Road Trip! The Final Frontier.

Status
Not open for further replies.
:lol: Y'alls reviews seriously crack me up. (Is it possible to seriously crack someone up?) They make me smile. :D

Yes I agree, Lora needs to get to Russia before she starts rocking in a corner and reciting scriptures from the Bible. :lol:

Hehe Lora, I'm glad I made you clap. I live for that! Wee! Alternatively, I made you do it in class. Ten times better. ;)

Thanks so much for the reviews!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hummercraft, 1pm

Delko: Let's not blow this one up. I mean, this is our original Hummercraft, right?

Horatio: That is true my friend.

Lora: *snaps elastic at Eric's head*

Delko: OW! *rubs head* Cut it out. You've been doing it for 40 minutes. You out of elastics yet?

Lora: I bought a bunch in the gift shop before we left.

Lilly: I don't understand why they put gift shops in hospitals.

Carly: It's the sentiment. Buy a 'get well' card.

Lora: I saw a 'my sincerest condolences' card. I feel for the poor bastard that has to buy that one.

Delko: Am I missing any hair on the back of my head? I can't see it. *twirling around in middle of aisle*

Lora: You want a mirror or something?

Delko: You have one?

Lora: A makeup mirror. It might not be enough for your big head.

Katie: *looks at watch*

Colton: What are you doing?

Katie: I'm trying to see how long I can hold my breath 30 000 feet in the air as opposed to on the ground.

Colton: And you're hoping to use this skill when...

Katie: In case I get kidnapped in Russia and shoved into a metal box destined for the Arctic.

Lora: Oh planning ahead, I like that.

Horatio: No one's going to get kidnapped by the Russians.

Lora: You have no idea what we're getting ourselves into, do you?

Horatio: Apparently not.

Katie: Speed, can you check my pulse while I count on my watch?

Speed: You can't do two things at once?

Katie: No.

Speed: *grabs Katie's hand*

Katie: Excellent. *inhales air*

Jess: Eric can you help me out with something?

Delko: Sure. *walks over*

Jess: *opens laptop*

Delko: *sits* ...What's all this?

Jess: I'm trying to look into Horatio's history.

Delko: Why?

Jess: Because something's buggin' me.

Delko: The fact that he's inhuman or the fact that we can't prove he's inhuman?

Jess: *slaps Eric* Pay attention. He's being over-protective for a reason and I'm determined to figure out why.

Delko: A woman on a mission, I like that.

Jess: *smiles*

Near front of Hummercraft

Speed: *smirks*

Katie: *looks at Speed, lifts brows*

Speed: Someone's pulse is getting faster.

Katie: *exhales, chokes* UGH. *slaps Speed* DON'T DO THAT! I just lost count.

Colton: Huh. I just had a flashback to when we first got in this Hummercraft. It involved CSI:pensacola, season two.

Calleigh: And a lot less people.

Ryan: When did this happen?

Calleigh: You weren't there. This was the first road trip.

Ryan: I'm sorry I missed it.

Speed: *opens newspaper* It wasn't that spectacular.

Delko: Hey is there a mobile crime lab in here?

Horatio: Yep, I had one installed last summer. Just walk down those stairs at the back.

Delko: Great.

Jess: *whispers* You planning on using it?

Delko: Why not? That's how I found out information on the guy who was harassing you.

Jess: True.

Katie: *flipping channels on tv* Why's the satellite only picking up Canadian channels?

Lora: Um, we're flying over Canada.

Katie: Jeopardy doesn't quite seem the same when it's on foreign tv.

Carly: MANHATTAN!

Everyone: *looks at Carly*

Carly: It's bound to be an answer someday.

Katie: Alex Trebec looks like a beam of light if you squint really hard. I knew it. He's a robot.

Calleigh: He's not a robot.

Katie: Fine but he's definitely not human. I mean, the guy was old when Beta was popular.

Speed: *smirks*

Katie: *looks over* Something funny?

Speed: I'm reading a funny article.

Katie: ...In the Business section.

Speed: Business is very funny.

Katie: Sure it is.

Calleigh: Oh oh! I know this one! Agh! The capital of Florida i-

Katie: HORATIO'S HOUSE!

Calleigh: ...I think you're wrong.

Colton: She is. It's Tallahassee.

Katie: Then why does Horatio seem to be the center of everything in Florida?

Colton: Alex Trebec doesn't know about Horatio.

Ryan: Alex Trebec doesn't make the questions.

Katie: Yes he does, how do you explain him knowing all the answers?

Ryan: He has the answers in front of him.

Katie: Uh that's impossible otherwise he would have made a mistake. There's like a hundred questions.

Carly: Just once I'd like to see him correct the stupid people with the wrong answer. Now THAT is reality tv.

Katie: People would riot in the streets.

Calleigh: Jeopardy's not that important.

Katie: If we didn't have Jeopardy, do you know how stupid Americans really would be? This is like a guaranteed grade 3 education.

Speed: *laughs*

Katie: *looks over*

Speed: *clears throat* Ziggy said something funny.

Katie: You're still in the Business section.

Speed: I flipped back there.

Katie: Right.

Lora: Ugh get a room already you two.

Katie: I'm going to choose to ignore that statement.

Colton: So what are we supposed to do when we get to Russia?

Lora: Uh duh, trip around the roads. That's why it's called a 'road trip'.

Horatio: Lora, you've made the itinerary, correct?

Lora: Oh yeah. I have a lot of cool places lined up. We'll be so busy, there won't be time for petty arguments and sexual tension.

Ryan: Damn then I don't want to go.

Lora: Shut up.

Katie: ERIC KNOWS RUSSIAN!

Delko: *looks up* What?

Katie: You know Russian, right?

Lora: Pfft not as much as I do.

Delko: I barely speak Spanish and you want me to speak Russian.

Calleigh: What are you talking about? You speak Spanish.

Delko: Not very well.

Calleigh: That is true.

Lora: Eric, we're going to have a Rush-off.

Delko: A what?

Lora: Russian standoff. You say something and then I'll say something and we'll vote who has the better understanding of Russian.

Delko: I already said I didn't.

Lora: Too bad. I need to be better than you and I need to prove it. GO.

Delko: What am I suppose to be say-

Lora: You just lost. That was all in English.

Katie: I know the F word in Russian.

Lora: GO.

Katie: Backwards R, upside down N and a P.

Lora: That's not the F word.

Katie: Oh. Well then I haven't been insulting the Russian prostitutes in downtown Miami very well.

Speed: *closes eyes*

Katie: *looks over* You okay?

Speed: *covers eyes* Mhm.

Katie: Are you laughing?

Speed: *shakes head*

Katie: Yes you are.

Missy: Remember when we learned Stetler's middle name was Ho-

Anni: *covers Missy's mouth* Shhhh! Horatio's not supposed to know.

Missy: But it was hilarious.

Horatio: Know what?

Missy: Stetler's middle name is Ho-

Anni: SHUT UP!

Colton: Why do I keep hearing Stetler's middle name as being 'Ho'.

Katie: Seriously, are you gonna make it?

Speed: *clears throat* I'm um...I'm *coughs* Sorry.

Katie: It wasn't even that funny.

Speed: I'm very visual.

Katie: You were picturing me yelling the wrong swears at Russian prostitutes?

Speed: Oh my God.

Katie: Is he high or something?

Anni: *rolls eyes* Not on drugs.

Lora: Wait there are Russians in Miami and no one told me? I want to meet these people.

Colton: You probably don't want to meet them.

Katie: Can you stop laughing?

Speed: Yeah. *clears throat* Sorry.

Katie: Thank you. Geez.

Colton: Did anyone pack coats? It's going to be cold in Russia.

Everyone: ...

Colton: Okay, that's what I thought. I've always wanted to freeze.

Katie: It can't be any colder than Canada.

Colton: Uh, we're still in winter.

Katie: Good point.

Speed: I'll go see what we brought. *stands, leaves*

Calleigh: We could always buy what they wear in Russia.

Horatio: I want to spend the least amount of money possible.

Lora: You're so cheap. Stop penny pinching.

Horatio: If I didn't penny pinch, we wouldn't have Hummerhomes.

Missy: You use Stetler's Visa for those.

Horatio: And I still have money, don't I?

Back room

Speed: *opens closet*

Anni: *walks over* Subtle.

Speed: What?

Anni: Are you kidding me? You couldn't stop laughing at something Katie said. Katie isn't funny.

Speed: *nods* Yeah I know.

Anni: You're weird.

Speed: I know that too.

Anni: *smiles* Still, it's kind of nice to see you happy.

Speed: *lifts brow*

Anni: *walks away*

Hummercraft area

Delko: *hands over coffee* So find anything out?

Jess: *typing* A lot of inconsistancies.

Delko: Really.

Jess: Well I mean, he has no parents, no siblings, no former addresses but I have a P.O. Box in New York.

Delko: That's...More than I found.

Jess: You found something?

Delko: *hands over paper* An article from the 80s when H started working for the bomb squad.

Jess: He made it into the newspaper?

Delko: Yeah. Not that it never happens but it's still something, right?

Jess: I guess. I'd have to read the article.

Delko: So you don't know what you're looking for.

Jess: I just need to know what's going on and to do that, I need to look into his past.

Further up

Ryan: *looks out window* Hey we're coming up over the ocean.

Lilly: There's no possible way we can crash, right?

Horatio: No. This is the safest mode of transport.

Lilly: That's what you said about the Hummerhome.

Horatio: High speed chases aren't recommended for them.

Lilly: Obviously.

TBC.............
 
it's great to see Speed laughing for a change instead of his usual gloomy self, and do I sense that Anni is getting a little jealous of Katie again?

Loving this roadtrip Geni, update soon please.
 
Speed is laughing? *rubs eyes* Delko is acting normal? *rubs eyes again* what kind of crazy world did I land in?

Horatio is the unusual suspect? Lora and Horatio are in cahoots, aren't they? I just know they are up to no good.

Great update, Geni.

MANHATTEN!
 
It's so great that Speed is laughing, I mean, the universe might explode, but yeah, it's great to see. Delko is back YESSSS!

And yes, I detect just a slight green eyed monster in Anni. But do you blame her? :lol:

Excellent work;)
 
Thanks for the reviews. :)

Sorry for dropping you into the wrong universe, Heather. :lol:

Anni, I don't blame her at all. :p


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

4pm, Hummercraft

Horatio: Hm.

Speed: What does 'hm' mean?

Horatio: I'm getting a call on the radio.

Calleigh: Who is it?

Horatio: I don't know. *presses button* Hello?

Voice: Unidentified aircraft, this is CAF. You are entering an unauthorized part of our air space.

Horatio: What the hell's a CAF?

Missy: Canadian Air Force.

Horatio: *presses button* Um, this is the Hummercraft from um, Miami. We're just passing through on our way to Russia.

Voice: Please follow one of our aircrafts to a landing area for verification.

Horatio: *presses button* We don't really have time for that.

Voice: Please follow one of our aircrafts to a landing area for verification. This is your final warning.

Calleigh: I think we should cooperate.

Missy: Yeah I don't want to go to prison again.

Horatio: Alright.

Lora: NO! Just fly away, they're Canadians! What are they going to do!

Horatio: I can't just evade them, it's not honest.

Lora: You evaded the cops in California.

Horatio: You must always respect the laws of foreign countries.

Lora: But not your own?

Horatio: ...

Lora: Ugh. I can't believe we're being detoured from Russia AGAIN.

Military airport

Horatio: *opens Hummercraft door*

Guns click

Horatio: Whoa. *lifts hands* I think there's been a bit of a misunderstanding here.

MP: Please exit the aircraft.

Horatio: Okay. Come on guys.

Inside interrogation room

MP: *crosses arms* You're under arrest.

Horatio: What? For what?

MP: For being in our air space without permission.

Horatio: I was sure I was still flying in US air space.

MP: Does Canada look like US space to you?

Horatio: This seems a little excesive.

MP: We don't get out much. Stand up please.

Jail cell

Calleigh: *walks over* Oh Horatio.

Horatio: *sitting on bench*

Delko: How come they only arrested you?

Lora: I managed to convince them we were hostages and Horatio's part of the former KGB and we're trying to escape back to Russia to save our families.

Katie: Wow. That's quite the lie.

Lora: I didn't want to sit in a jail cell again.

Horatio: *sigh* Go on to Russia without me. I'll get there eventually once I clear this up.

Missy: It's still funny that they only arrested YOU.

Horatio: *sigh*

Jess: *looks at Eric* Can I talk to you alone?

Delko: Sure.

Corner of building

Delko: So what is it?

Jess: He doesn't really seem like himself.

Delko: He doesn't?

Jess: *rolls eyes* He seems hopeless, unmotivated, regretful...

Delko: He was just shoved in a prison cell.

Jess: See I think there's still something up with him.

Delko: Why don't you just ask him?

Jess: Because getting a straight answer out of him is impossible. It's always fragmented sentences.

Delko: So put the sentences together and they won't be fragmented.

Jess: ...Okay did you just drop 20 IQ points?

Delko: I thought you wanted me to.

Jess: I did but this is the one time where I'd like your cooperation.

Delko: So I'm not allowed to be smart unless you want my help?

Jess: Yes.

Delko: That doesn't make any sense.

Jess: When you're part of this team, NOTHING makes sense.

Outside

Katie: What are you doing?

Speed: Checking the flow tanks on the Hummercraft.

Katie: Do we have enough fuel to get to Russia?

Speed: Well unless you count frozen fuel as 'enough' then no.

Katie: How'd it freeze?

Speed: There's a hole in one of the tanks.

Katie: So what do we do?

Speed: Nothing for the moment. *wipes hand on cloth*

Katie: *scratches head*

Speed: What?

Katie: ...Anni told me why you two split.

Speed: Really.

Katie: *sigh* I guess we could get into the millions of reasons why you should still be with Anni but she seems to understand. *shrugs* People change.

Speed: What exactly did she tell you?

Katie: That's what she told me. Why? Was there more?

Speed: *stares blankly*

Katie: *rolls eyes* Relax, I'm not that stupid.

Speed: *looks down at cloth*

Katie: You okay?

Speed: Just a while ago Anni and I seemed okay. And now...*sigh* She hasn't been happy for a while. Apparently she got into marriage before she knew what the hell she was doing. That and her issue with you.

Katie: I'm sorry.

Speed: *nods*

Katie: I thought you didn't think of me as more than a friend.

Speed: It's complicated.

Katie: I see that.

Speed: Anyway, we need to repair the fuel tanks before we can take off again. It's a good thing we landed here or we'd have crashed.

Katie: And Horatio says it's the safest mode of transport.

TBC...............
 
:lol: Horatio being arrested is such an oxymoron. hehe

Katie and Speed banter. Jess and Delko banter. Just like old times. *le sigh*

And Lora. :lol: I thought you loved the man. ;)
 
OH MY GOD DRAMA!
I don't have the competence at the moment to put into words just how amazing this is!
Personally like the mature Delko more, and Speedle drama is flaring again, and we're still not in Russian, but not arrested, but WE GOT PULLE OVER BY CANADIAN MILITARY POLICE! That is a first. I think...
GENI! IS! AMAZING!
 
Ha..Anni's understanding but not that understanding :lol: And I guess the real reason she's not been happy bc her husband's been making goo goo eyes at katie at every turn....lol..but yeah, she's understanding. I'm just looking for her to just lose it all over that Hummer home...that would be something to see:lol:

Horatio...in a ...jail cell....Hhahahahahahah...poor Horatio.

And whats with the cloak and dagger with Jess and Eric concerning the Red one?

And poor Lora...hasn't gotten to Russia yet...

Excellent work!
 
Who would have thought it huh....Horatio being arrested....interesting. :eek:

I have to feel sorry for Anni I mean with Katie hanging around and Speed still having feelings for her it must be tough for her. I have a sense that something is going to explode between Anni and Katie, I mean Speed is certainly worth fighting for don't you think? :devil:

thanks Geni , more updates soon please. :D
 
I didn't mean that the ways that we lost the other hummerhomes were not interesting as well lol, I just think that evading being arrested and crashing into a tree with a giant hummer has got to be the best one yet lol. Great updates, hopefully we get to russia soon before Lora blows up lol. *little calming voice herd* in case of lora exploding go into the fetal position and kiss ur bottom goodbye!!!!
LOL
Can't wait for more, although I won't be able to check until the 26th after tonight seeing as I'm getting dragged out of calgary and off to a little town where rush hour is one person walking down the street, and theres no internet ... how will i survive????
 
LOL! Anni definitely is understanding but she will definitely lose it. Maybe not specifically due to the afforementioned dilemma with her hubby but it'll play a role in it. The proverbial 'last straw' as it were.

And no worries Jaci, lol, I knew what you meant. ;) (Good luck in the empty town, by the way. :eek:)

Thanks for the reviews everyone!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next morning--Military base

Calleigh: So have we got some fuel?

Ryan: Yeah Speed just picked some up and I finished repairing the tanks.

Calleigh: ....You repaired the tanks.

Ryan: What? I used to work at a garage with my uncle when I was a teenager.

Calleigh: *smiles* I didn't know that.

Ryan: Not a lot of people know about my personal life.

Delko: Is H out of the prison cell yet? I'm getting bored and sleeping on these chairs really hurt my back.

Horatio: *walks over* I'm out, sorry for the delay.

Delko: You need to stop doing that.

Horatio: Jess, may I speak to you?

Jess: Uh..Sure. *stands, leaves*

Horatio: Why don't you all get back to the Hummercraft and warm it up.

Calleigh: Sure.

Lobby

Horatio: *sits on bench* Have a seat.

Jess: *sits*

Horatio: I found this lying on the ground outside near the Hummercraft this morning. *hands over paper*

Jess: *looks down* Ugh. Eric, stupid idiot.

Horatio: This article's from a while ago. Any reason why you printed it off?

Jess: How did you know it was me?

Horatio: *stares at Jess*

Jess: *sigh* So what, am I in trouble?

Horatio: No. Not at all. But I'm curious as to why you've been looking into my past.

Jess: Because you're weird around me and don't give me this 'you're not used to the dangers we face every day' crap because Eric should probably be dead 10 times over.

Horatio: Jess...I wasn't completely honest with you, I'll admit that. But-

Jess: What is it?

Horatio: *looks down at paper* ...Did you read the article?

Jess: I skimmed it. Bank robbery in Miami gone wrong, a few people died.

Horatio: *nods* That's right.

Jess: So?

Horatio: One of the people who died that day was your mother.

Jess: ...Wh-What...What are you talking about? She died in a car accident when I was eight. My father told me that they were in Miami on vacation and their rental was run off the road by drunk driver.

Horatio: Unfortunately that's not what happened.

Jess: *frowns* So what the hell happened? Why would he lie?

Horatio: I don't know why he would lie.

Jess: Tell me what happened.

Horatio: ...Your parents were at the bank to exchange some of their cash into smaller bills. Three men walked in with the intention of robbing the bank. Patrol found out they were setting bombs around the hostages. We learned they had robbed a series of banks across the US with the same M.O. They would steal the money and escape as the police entered the building, blowing them up along with the hostages.

Jess: Weren't you on the bomb squad?

Horatio: It was my second week. The negotiator managed to get three hostages out after five hours of talking. Your father was one of those three people. By the time we finally got the green light to enter the bank, the men were gone and bombs surrounded the rest of the hostages.

Jess: *staring at Horatio*

Horatio: Our first action was to locate the bombs and then figure out what kind they are. From then on our next step was to defuse them before they could be detonated. But...They all had pressure switches. It wasn't like the other robberies. There was no remote switch and all of the hostages were sitting on them.

Jess: ...

Horatio: Your mother panicked, I couldn't calm her down. *looks down at floor* ...I couldn't keep her still. That was all it took.

Jess: *glares* So you just let her move. She was probably in shock and scared out of her god damned mind! Why did you live!

Horatio: I don't know.

Jess: *stands* Great, not only did you not do anything, but you got my mother killed in the process. Don't you even dare try to blame that on her. Thank you, I really appreciate the fact that I grew up without a mother. *leaves*

Horatio: *sigh*

Hummercraft, 20 minutes later

Calleigh: *switches buttons on* Are we ready to take off?

Ryan: If we don't explode.

Calleigh: Ye of little faith.

Lora: So we're FINALLY going to Russia?

Calleigh: Hopefully we'll be there in the next few hours.

Lora: Good because until we get the new Hummerhome, I rented us a hotel.

Colton: I hope it's not some dingey thing.

Lora: *slaps Colton* Would I do that?

Colton: ...Yes.

Lora: *rolls eyes* It's not dingey. Think of it as The Hilton but without service.

Everyone: *grumbles*

Lora: Oh shut up, it was the cheapest thing I could find. It was either this or sleeping in the streets which isn't the best idea in Russia.

Katie: Can't we find something on Expedia?

Lora: You'll sleep in the hotel I picked. Horatio put me in charge of it and you're going to like it.

Katie: I probably won't.

Lora: Look on the bright side, you all have your own rooms.

Delko: Isn't that expensive though?

Lora: No.

Delko: ...How big are the rooms?

Lora: 12 feet by 12 feet.

Everyone: ...

Speed: So...Just so I can clarify it for myself, we're staying in a prison?

Lora: It's a hotel!

Ryan: Give me the laptop.

Lora: Get your own laptop.

Ryan: We're not staying in some low-cost hotel.

Lora: Too bad.

Ryan: I DON'T WANT TO SLEEP IN A SHOE BOX!

Lilly: Or alone...Russia scares the crap out of me.

Lora: The whole point of a road trip is to have fun, discover new things and have an ADVENTURE. It's no adventure when we stay in 5 star hotels with room service, satellite tv and complimentary breakfasts.

Horatio: Agreed. I think this will be a good experience.

Lora: See? He's on my side. So whatever he says, goes.

Ryan: I'd rather sleep in the cubby hole under my seat.

Lilly: *slaps Ryan*

Ryan: OW.

Katie: Um *raises hand* I have a teeny problem.

Lora: What.

Katie: I'm scared of enclosed spaces.

Lora: So?

Katie: ...So I'll freak out.

Lora: You'll get over it.

Katie: Lora, you don't understand. I can't sleep in a small room.

Lora: TOO. BAD.

Katie: ...You're really mean.

TBC...................
 
Aw come on, Russia's not THAT scary... of course, you haven't met me yet. XD

Great job!!! Can't wait to see what happens next.
 
And Lora. :lol: I thought you loved the man. ;)
Click to expand...
Hey i DO Happy. :lol: I'm just not the one writing the fic.

Lora: Eric, we're going to have a Rush-off.
Delko: A what?
Lora: Russian standoff. You say something and then I'll say something and we'll vote who has the better understanding of Russian.
Click to expand...
:lol: *laughing* That's one of the funniest things i've heard. :lol: My youth friends behind me are now coming with other ones suck as 'Jap-Off'' and 'Span-Off.' :lol:

Missy: Remember when we learned Stetler's middle name was Ho-
Anni: *covers Missy's mouth* Shhhh! Horatio's not supposed to know.
Missy: But it was hilarious.
Horatio: Know what?
Missy: Stetler's middle name is Ho-
Anni: SHUT UP!
Colton: Why do I keep hearing Stetler's middle name as being 'Ho'.
Click to expand...
:lol: :lol: I still have that scene saved to a Word Doc. :lol: CLASSIC.

Oh my goodness, Jess's mom died because of Horatio? Oh wow, i wonder how Jess is going to act around Horatio from now on. (Wouldn't that suck though? Finding out the reason one of your parents aren't alive is because of your boss??)

Horatio: What the hell's a CAF?
Missy: Canadian Air Force.
Click to expand...
WHOA. We have an Air Force? I only thought we had the tv show Air Farce! Wow, i would of though those jets would of fallen apart by now.

Ok, are we going to Russia or no? Like we're were supposed to go like 3 pages ago, in the other thread! :lol: Thanks for the updates Gen! Marry Christmas everyone! :D
 
Anni definitely is understanding but she will definitely lose it.
Click to expand...

So, Anni's going to have a breakdown... DUDE, I'm so there. I mean this is the one person who hasn't broken down through out this roadtrip (with the exception of the yelling match between her and Katie- but I don't count that.)

What a revelation about Jess' mom???? Granted, she had the right to be upset, but still Horatio's just human ( still being proven at the present time), and he was green on the job. He already feels guilty enough...

So, Lora finally gets underway to Russia, and the accomdations she made were less than stellar. I can't wait to see what's next! :)

Excellent work!
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top