Quotes you WON'T hear - Pt 2

(Sara is walking into the lab one evening, kind of uncomfortable and adjusting her pants and scratching her inner thighs. She goes into the locker room still doing this and making really uncomfortable, itchy faces. Greg sees this and decides to be a smart-aleck.)

Greg: Whatsa matter? Fall in some poison oak?

Sara: No. I've got beard burn...

Greg: Huh? Women don't have beards at all, let alone on their inner thighs... :eek: (Greg suddenly pauses, then his eyes get really wide and he gets a majorly appalled and disgusted facial expression) NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! (Greg then runs out of the locker room screaming.)

Sara: (Reaches into Greg's locker and grabs a bottle of aloe vera gel) Well, now I can use his Aloe without him caring... :lol:
 
Ecklie smiled as he signed off the budget.
Deciding in haste, the Lab's money he would not waste
In Christmas bonuses and overtime
Or other things his mind would never rhyme.

Greg cried, "How could he do this, do this to us all."
And Grissom surmised, "I guess it's because his heart is three sizes too small."


As Ecklie rubbed his hands in glee, Catherine walked in, leaned over his desk and started to sing:
You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch.
You really are a heel.

Ecklie sat back aghast then Nick popped up beside the desk, startling as the Texan sang:
You're as cuddly as a cactus,
You're as charming as an eel.
Mr. Grinch!!!

Warrick popped up on the other side of the desk and sang

You're a bad banana
With a greasy black peel.



Merry Christmas!!!
 
Grissom: Conrad, we are running low on supplies. The luminol is watered down. The DNA swabs are almost out and no, we can't wash them out and reuse them. You'll have to increase the budget. And a couple of my team members requested Christmas Day off and were rejected.
Ecklie: Bah, humbug!
 
myfuturecsi said:
Idea taken from a Levi's commercial-check it on You Tube.

Nick's hallucination autopsy takes a new twist.

Nick opens up his eyes to Doc Robbins whistling 'Tainted Love'.

He opens his mouth and starts to sing:

Sometimes I feel I've got to
Run away I've got to
Get away

Doc jumps back: WTF!

Super Dave runs over: what


Nick continues to sing despite having an open cavity in his chest
From the pain that you drive into the heart of me

Super Dave stares at Doc Robbins and then continues the song:

The love we share
Seems to go nowhere

Nick: And I've lost my light
For I toss and turn I can't sleep at night


Doc Robbins, Super Dave and Nick sing gother:

Once I ran to you

Wendy runs into the moruge singing
(I ran)


Now I'll run from you

Hodges runs intot he morgue singing to Wendy:

This tainted love you've given
I give you all a boy could give you

All of them sing:
Take my tears and that's not nearly all
Oh...tainted love
Tainted love

Nick continues: Now I know I've got to
Run away I've got to
Get away
You don't really want IT any more from me

Grissom and Sara waltz into the lab singing:
To make things right
You need someone to hold you tight

Catherine and Warrick samba into the lab singing:

And you'LL think love is to pray
But I'm sorry I don't pray that way


Nick sings:

Don't touch me please
I cannot stand the way you tease
I love you though you hurt me so
Now I'm going to pack my things and go

All together they sing:

Tainted love, tainted love (x2)
Touch me baby, tainted love (x2)
Tainted love

Check out the commercial

LOL thats well funny
Imagine a CSI musical...
 
(Grissom and Ecklie are in the Sheriff's Office)

Grissom: Sheriff, we need your permission to take the day off. Aliens have kidnapped Nick!

Sheriff: Excuse me?

Grissom: It's true! The even kidnapped Ecklie and gave him an Anal Probe!

Ecklie: That's just a little joke, therel Sheriff!


* * * * *

(We see Hodges and Ecklie walking around the lab conspiratorilly)

Hodges: NARF! So, Conrad, whaddaya wanna do tonight?

Ecklie: The same thing we do every night, Davie: Try to get Grissom fired!

Singers: (voiceover) They're Hodges and Ecklie!
Yes, Hodges and Ecklie!
One thinks he's a genius
the other's just gay!
They're laboratory hacks!
They're both kinda whack!
They're Hodges,
Hodges and Ecklie-lie-lie-lie
lie-lie-lie-lie....

Before The Night-shift's done
Their plan will be inspired
By the dawning of the sun
Gil Grissom will be fired.

They're Hodges and Ecklie!
Yes, Hodges and Ecklie!
Their twilight reverie
Is plain for all to see.
To exert their Baldly Bliss
They'll get Grissom dismissed
They're Hodges,
Hodges and Ecklie-lie-lie-lie
lie-lie-lie-lie....

Hodges: NARF!!!
 
Greg: NARF! So, Grissom, whaddaya wanna do tonight?

Grissom: The same thing we do every night, Greg: Try to solve every murder ever committed in the state of Nevada.

Greg: And they call me the dumb one. NARF!
 
shazza_018, I sent you a pm regarding your signature, if you haven't seen it please referre to the blinking icon at the top of forum. ;)
 
Nicky Stokes-The Demon Barber of Vegas

Nick has been fired from the Lab,so he takes Mandy with him and they open up a barber shop.

He gets a visit from Ecklie, who threatens to blackball him through the US.

So Nick invites him for a shave and the proceeds to ...well..you know..

Nick tosses Ecklie's body into a chest just as Mandy walks in with tea and cookies for them.

Mandy: Mr. S, you didn't!
[looks into the chest and sees Ecklie's dead body. Shuts it]
Mandy: You're barking mad! Killing a man what done no harm to ya!
Nick: [polishing his razor] He recognized me from the old days. Tried to blackmail me. Half me earnings.
Mandy: [relieved] Oh, well that's a different matter then. For a moment there I thought you lost your marbles.

Nick turns away from Mandy and smiles evily.
 
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