SCIENCE
-Dustin opens the stapler and it shoots a stick of staples across the room
Dustin: ...Well, that was cool.
Buster: Maybe it'd work better with staples in it.
-Dustin: Why do you have a Lightning McQueen pen?
Brandon: Because Lighting McQueen is a pimp.
-Hannah: You need to go to American Idol so I can laugh at you.
Sarah: No!
Hannah: And they always put the ones who suck really bad on TV, so everyone would see you...You should dance, too.
-Mrs. Louks: What state of matter is this desk in?
Josh: Wood!
-Mrs. Louks: This table is actually frozen...
Me: So you could melt wood?
Mrs. Louks: Yes...
Jeremiah: Sweet! Liquid wood!
-Buster: She's got a knife!
Mrs. Louks: Yes, and I will be asking you for blood donations later.
-Mrs. Louks: You wouldn't want to use a bimetal strip on a building. Because what would happen when it got hot?
Jeremiah: You'd have modern art.
-Jeremiah: I had no idea I was going to blacksmith class to day.
-Jeremiah...again: Smelt something!
GEOMETRY
-Blake: Yeah, I could never keep a little kid. I'd be like, you see that old lady walking with a cane? Yeah? Go kick it out from under her.
-Mrs. Butler: This is easy...I say hesitantly because no sooner than I say that you'll say, 'You said this was easy.'.
Blake: You said this was easy!
-Mrs. Butler: Write down what you will learn.
David: Okay. Nothing...well, I'm done.
-Mrs. Butler: Write! Write! Write!
Matt: Left! Left! Left!
-Blake: What do you mean 'people like me'?
Mrs. Butler: I said you could take that however you want.
Blake: So; hot, sexy supermodels?
Mrs. Butler: No, not at all.
Blake: You said I could take it however I want.
-Blake: I'm gonna write a book called 'Geometry for Idiots'.
Mrs. Butler: ...I'm biting my tongue...
-Micah: Why do you go to that one instead of ABC?
Blake: Why don't you go to LMNOP?...XYZ?...Next time won't you sing with me?
-Mrs. Butler: This is one of the problems you'll have on your homework.
David: I'm sorry, I don't speak Spanish.
-Blake: Sierra, I've got to tell you, I love you like a fat kid loves cake...
Sierra: You would know!
-Blake: Other than baseball, I'm not in any club. Oh, and I joined FBLA so I could skip 2 days of school.
John: Spanish Club!
Blake: Oh yeah! We joined Spanish Club just to mess with the teacher. We were gonna run for President and Vice-President but they didn't tell us about the meeting. Then she was like, 'That's Blake! Scribble him out! That's John! Scribble him out! Oh, Timmy won...but it was a close race between Timmy and these two names that I couldn't read because they're scribbled out.' 'Who's Timmy?' 'I don't know.'
ENGLISH
-Tony: I'm keeping the pencil in case I get hungry.
Mrs. Free: In case you get hungry? That's an awful lot of fiber, isn't it?
Tony: I'm just messin' with you.
Mrs. Free: Oh. Well, with you people I've learned to not assume.
HISTORY
-Jeff: What's that noise?
Ms. G: What noise?
Jeff: I swear I hear something...I'm freaking out.
Ms. G: That's not new for you, Jeffery.
Jeff: No! I know I hear something!
Ms. G: Jeffery, calm down. Take a deep clensing, calming breath...
Jeff: AHHHHHHH!!!
Ms. G: What is that noise?
Sierra: I'm looking at pictures on my camera.
Ms. G: Weel, stop, because Jeffery is spazing out back there.
-Josh is setting in the back of the class listening to his iPod
Ms. G: I assume you all know what the Crusades were. What's that, Josh?
Josh: Actually...I don't know what the Crusades were.
Ms. G: I'm surprised you actually knew what I said.
Josh: It's turned down.
A moment of odd silence...
Ms. G: Anyway!
-Ms. G: The weapon of choice was the crossbow. Basically, because you didn't have to know what you were doing to use it. It's like a camera, you point and shoot and you're bound to hit something.
ORAL COMM.
-Mrs. Overstreet: Where's Mrs. Free?
Nose: I don't know, but I'm the teacher's aid...What?!
Mrs. Overstreet: I'm a little worried about what you're teaching them
-Adam is cleaning his desk and humming in a very high tone
Jon: You missed a spot.
Adam scrubs frantically
Richard: It's amazing how much smoother that stuff makes your desk
-Mrs. Free: We'll just ignore Adam, he's been huffing cleaner.
Adam: Huh?
-Alan: Yai! Yai! Yai! Yai! Yai! Yai! Yai!
Mrs. Free: Was that an invitation to mate?
Nose: That was his mating call.
Alan: Mrs. Free, guess what.
Mrs. Free: That WAS your mating call?
Alan:...No...
A rare occurance but this is from BAND
-The principal comes over the intercom and makes an announcement that the class was too loud to hear
Mr. Mitchell: Did you hear that? He said, 'Mr. Mitchell is getting a big, fat raise.'
A few kids cheer and several woodwinds say, "Yay! We'll get new reeds!"
SPANISH
-Anna's mom: I need to see Anna for just a second...Money honey!
Buster: Money?
Josh: I'll take money!
-Mrs. Hutchings: How much does it say a torta costs?
Maggie: Twelve.
Mrs. Hutchings: In Spanish?
Keri: Twelve.
Mrs. Hutchings: In Spanish!
Buster: Twelve.
-Mrs. Hutchings: He says a la una. What time is that?
Josh: Uno o'clock.
:lol: Wow! When I started this thread I didn't expect it to be so popular. Thanks for posting, ya'll. It's so much fun to see what funny and stupid stuff goes on in your schools