The Rant & I Cannot Say This Out Loud Thread

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SaraSidle_girl said:
To my ex-girlfriend
I want to burn every letter, every card you ever send me. I want to tear up every picture I have off you. I want you out of my life. Nothing should remember me of you.

But I can't.
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*hugs* X1000 million trillon gazillion.
I know what you're going through, it hurts, and even as stupid as it sounds with that whole stupid "time will heal everything" it might take a while, but it eventually will.

To my mother: I guess I did miss you. I spent 5 years telling myself I hated you and never wanted to speak to you again. I told myself I would never miss you, and that I hated you. But I guess I didn't hate you, I did miss you, and I'm glad that things are getting better, I really am. Because I really did miss you so much. It just took a long time to see that...

To my stupid idiotic friend: :mad: :mad: :mad: #&$%, aghhhh. You bug me so much. You are just like, the stupdiest person ever. Whene were kidding around about stuff about people you go running up to them and be like "they're planning to hit you with a bus" like yes, we were ACTUALLY planning to run over people with a bus. You are so stupid, that was a joke. And then freaking out on Katlynn because you adore Makenzie but Katlynn doesn't because she was constantly mean to Katlynn. She was always being a super bitch, then you freak out on her and tell her she hates everyone and she's being stupid and an idiot for hating "such a nice person". Well, I don't know about you, but I don't generally love people who made me cry. You just make me soooo madd! Like AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

(Hehe, sorry about that one, I really had to get that out though :lol:)

To my uncle: I really miss you. I miss your funny comments you always made. I miss your smile, the drinks you made, your sarcastic comebacks. When I was putting myself down, you did it right with me, in a funny way, that made me feel better. I miss it so much, I miss you so much. I keep remembering being together, so many memories are filling my thoughts latley. Like when someone said "thank god your pretty" and I replyed with "but im not" and you said "well, i guess your screwed". It was so funny, made me feel so happy, made me laugh so hard. Or when Allie told us that fasting made you hungry, you laughed so hard. And that one time I like, couldn't get your satellite to work and you were like "you're an idiot, all you had to do was press the on button" I just miss you so much. I wish you were here, you always were able to make me happy. I wish you could see how much I fixed in my life, but you can't. I just want you back. I love you.
 
CatherineWillows said:
SaraSidle_girl said:
To my ex-girlfriend
I want to burn every letter, every card you ever send me. I want to tear up every picture I have off you. I want you out of my life. Nothing should remember me of you.

But I can't.
Click to expand...

*hugs* X1000 million trillon gazillion.
I know what you're going through, it hurts, and even as stupid as it sounds with that whole stupid "time will heal everything" it might take a while, but it eventually will.
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Thank you, Levon.. I've been trying to catch you on msn but everytime I'm online, you're not :p

To my uncle: I really miss you. I miss your funny comments you always made. I miss your smile, the drinks you made, your sarcastic comebacks. When I was putting myself down, you did it right with me, in a funny way, that made me feel better. I miss it so much, I miss you so much. I keep remembering being together, so many memories are filling my thoughts latley. Like when someone said "thank god your pretty" and I replyed with "but im not" and you said "well, i guess your screwed". It was so funny, made me feel so happy, made me laugh so hard. Or when Allie told us that fasting made you hungry, you laughed so hard. And that one time I like, couldn't get your satellite to work and you were like "you're an idiot, all you had to do was press the on button" I just miss you so much. I wish you were here, you always were able to make me happy. I wish you could see how much I fixed in my life, but you can't. I just want you back. I love you.
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A big hug back to you... x10.0000

To my shrink:
I have to go see you this afternoon. Don't want to. I don't like you. I pretend I do. I hope that after today I don't have to come back. A part of me knows it might be good if I do come back but I just had enough :mad: I don't want it anymore.

So I put on my happy face and fake it all again..
 
gregslabmouse said:
To: My dad
you have a lot of nerve calling and asking us to pick you up from jail today. All I have to say is you're lucky I didn't answer the phone, I wouldn't have been half as nice as mom was about saying f*** off. You're the parent, YOU should be taking care of US, NOT the other way around. When you decide to grow up and take responsibility, we'll talk. Until then, stay the hell out of our lives.
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I understand what you must be going through, If you ever want to talk just PM me.

To my dad:
You are one lucky person. Thank god they didn't have something and at least postponed you trial. but I'm saying this as someone who is concerned GET A FRIGGIN LAWYER!!!!! You make me sooooo mad! you refuse to get a lawyer because your ego would get hurt. Screw you ego! I thought you wanted to see me soon. I thought you wanted to get out.Don't be so full of yourself. You can't defend yourself. I want to be able to see you. I love you soo much. But I almost hate you as much.
 
Imperfect said:
gregslabmouse said:
To: My dad
you have a lot of nerve calling and asking us to pick you up from jail today. All I have to say is you're lucky I didn't answer the phone, I wouldn't have been half as nice as mom was about saying f*** off. You're the parent, YOU should be taking care of US, NOT the other way around. When you decide to grow up and take responsibility, we'll talk. Until then, stay the hell out of our lives.
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I understand what you must be going through, If you ever want to talk just PM me.

To my dad:
You are one lucky person. Thank god they didn't have something and at least postponed you trial. but I'm saying this as someone who is concerned GET A FRIGGIN LAWYER!!!!! You make me sooooo mad! you refuse to get a lawyer because your ego would get hurt. Screw you ego! I thought you wanted to see me soon. I thought you wanted to get out.Don't be so full of yourself. You can't defend yourself. I want to be able to see you. I love you soo much. But I almost hate you as much.
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*Hugs you both*

To my shrink:
Thanks for whatever... I did it myself, like everyone else says. I don't need you anymore :) Thank God you saw that too. Goodbye.
 
To Lieske:

When do you start giving me some trust back, this time you made the appiontment wrong, what will you do next time. I hate it, i hate that i can call you when i am in a crisis at nights. It really sucks. You are a bitch and i wish i could say it to you. But i cant because i dont want to fight or show myself to you. I dont want you to see how i feel or what there is inside my head. It is my problem now. I make this choose. I know you are my therapist but you dumped me and that makes me still so f***ing mad. I dont understand it anymore like i said before because i dont want to. You must help me that is your job, just start doing it and dont walk away from me like you are doing now. I can manipulate you already and that is not a good thing. You need to be strong and find out who and what i am. Dont let me trick you because then it would be easy to make you think somethings that isnt true. LIke that i am doing so good while I am doing worse. You are so stupid about that. Try to see into my eyes and behind my smile. Its up to you to make the right stap now and dont let me slip away..
 
*Hugs Berylla Nienna*

To D... (my beloved teacher)
Talking to you today was so nice. You just let me talk. You even told me I looked nice and sweet. I felt my heart going crazy when you said that. And you kept looking at me, hardly ever taking your eyes of me. As much as I liked it, it felt uncomfortable too. I wonderd if you know I love you.
We talked. And when we were finished I mentioned something was wrong with my grades. You took my list and checked it, saw something was off and immidiatly you went to make it right for me. You never even taught me that class and still you were sticking up for me, demanding they let me pass. You said I made every test. You don't know that. Its true but you can't know! But you were sticking up for me.
And now I have an excuse to see you again next week. I have to pick my list up again at your office.. Yeey!
You wished me luck on my oral test and I swear that is what made me do so well! You did.
You are so beautiful and I wish I could just have you. For just one night. In my arms. Just one night..

To myself
You did great on your oral exam. A 7.8 is very good! and another 7.8 for your report.. You're some student.
But please just stop loving D. In a few weeks you'll never see her again. Just let her go. She's too old for you, she's already with someone. Quit those stupid dreams you're having. Stop smiling whenever you see her or think of her. Just.. get her out of your head.

But she's way to loveable!
 
To the guys I will call M.G.: Dude, tell that girl that you love her! You are going to leave during the summer and she thinks that you like me. Make her stop! We obviously don't have feelings for each other(you have showed that well enough to me) and she is oblivious to that fact that you are in love with her. Go get her before it's too late!

To a girl I will call M.M: M.G is in love with you! Stop thinking that he likes me and telling him that he loves me, he loves you and everyone can tell that. I don't want anything to do with him and get this straight; I DON'T LIKE HIM AND NEVER WILL. So open your eyes to the fact that he is in love with you and doesn't know how to say it to you. He's going to move to North Carolina over the summer. Time is ticking!
 
To the Greatest person I Know:
Even though, I know we messed up everything together, and it's basically all my fault, I would do anything to have you over, and just watch movies, like we used. or like that time you hit me in the face with a baseball. I miss you, and I just want us back. I miss you touching me and kissing me and everything else. I just want you to call.

To My Brother:
Today you would have been 18. I miss you. more than anything. I wish you could be here. For anything, I'd trade it all. I love you and miss you. RIP.

To My Other Brother:
Okay, I've tolerated your drug use, drug sales, and even you screwing over the best thing you've ever had. but you know how Mom gets today. You couldn't call, You couldn't stop buy, you couldn't e-mail, or make an effort. just forget where we live, I never want to hear from you again.
 
AshleyWillows said:
To My Brother:
Today you would have been 18. I miss you. more than anything. I wish you could be here. For anything, I'd trade it all. I love you and miss you. RIP.

To My Other Brother:
Okay, I've tolerated your drug use, drug sales, and even you screwing over the best thing you've ever had. but you know how Mom gets today. You couldn't call, You couldn't stop buy, you couldn't e-mail, or make an effort. just forget where we live, I never want to hear from you again.
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Awwe. *Gives Super Big Hug*


Randomness I need to get out: I can't believe how much of my life you've missed! I've mentioned my friends in almost all my letters. But I forgot, you've never met any of them. And yet, you were the one (are still the one) I would tell my secrets to. Not Mom. Lissa hasn't even heard all of them. You're the one I wan't to tell. I disgust myself that I still have this need for you. This need to be good enough for you, you were never good enough for me, for mom. And yet I still need your assurence that you care. That you're still the same, even though we both know you're not. I still can't believ how much it tore me up that you didn't sign your letter no big looping 'Love Dad' written at the bottem. Instaed just a 'hope you have fun durign your break'. I just wanted to see your name written by you. Just so I know that's it's still you. I'll heal over like always, and you'll tear me apart again.
 
To myself:
What will you do when you loose her? What will you do when you have to leave and will never see her again? Face it. In a few weeks you'll be gone and she will still be there..
Get her out of your head while you still can cause you will crash and burn the night you are forced to say goodbye to her. Quit hoping she will hug you when you leave. Quit hoping she will kiss you when you leave. Quit hoping. Quit loving. But my damn heart won't listen

To my parents:
You are actually proud of me. First I had good grades and you were proud. Now I am invited for a job interview and I made both of you proud again.
Never expected you would ever be proud of me again. I kinda felt you never loved me enough. Maybe I was wrong.
 
To my roommate:

I am so sorry that I am not great and helpfull today. But I am so sick of pretending. I am not in the mood for a party and want to be alone but i cant because the party is over here. It sucks now i have to put op a smile on my face, be kind and helpfull, all that i want today is sitting on the couch and watch the telly. Be with my cat and do nothing. Having my baggy close on and feel the way i feel. Because I feel terible. I hate the world today, dont want to like it. I want someone around me and put a arm around me and stay with me. Be nice to me and tells me that i am not a hatefull stupid b*tch. That i can be good and nice and sweet. I need compliments from the ones i love. And not this stupid party, not to dress up and be nice to people i dont even know. I hate it that they are going to be in my house and taking away my safeness. I hate it and it sucks. I cant be angry but i feel angry, i want to scream, hit you or yell/call you names. I want to make the people disappear and leave me alone, cant be safe in my own home and that really really sucks and hurt.. Damn it..
 
To my chem teacher: what the f**K! who the hell gives you the right to talk t me like that. Some of those things you said were really uncalled for and to blurt out stuff my tutor told you in confidence to the WHOLE class was about as low as it gets. You're lucky i didn't slap you and i mean it. It takes alot to make me cry but well done you did it! I hate you so just leave me alone.

To my tutor: How can i ever thank you enough for everthing you've helped me with this year. A couple of yrs ago i wouldn't have dreamed about seeking help on you know what and now you like know me better than anyone! I appreciate you going out of your way to tell her she's in the wrong and how sweet are you! "come chat to me more often i helps" awww bless ya your just brill!

To my friends: OMG i love you all sooooo much i know im meant to be the strong one of the group and it must have been hard to see me in that state but thanks to you lot im feeling great again!
 
To *****: I'm sorry, what i said last night, I didn't mean it. I sat alone and thought about it. I made the right desision before. I don't love you in the way I did. I don't want to ruin the relationship we've built despite the fact that it seemed the world was against us at times. We've had our fights. Their over. We've had our love. That kind of love is over for us. I'm Sorry. The way you hugged me last night, it made me feel specail again. Made me feel so loved, but I can't return what I felt you give me. I'm So Sorry.

To self: You're so stupid for leading her on, even though you didn't mean to. You should have known she would have wanted you back, been willing to give you eveything. Why did you have to say you wanted her back. You sould've tooken time to think it out clear headedly.

To self (again): Go ahead. I thought you said you wern't afraid to show yourself. to do your own thing with everyone looking. Go for it.

To *****: Plaese forgive me. I'm So Super Sorry.
 
To someone: I gots a little secret, but I will probably never tell you. It's nothing bad, but I still probably won't tell you.

To a friendy friend: What is happening to you? You're all "hi, you are no longer my friend" latley, I didn't even take sides in the stupid fight! Yeeeshh.

To my mother: This will be weird when I give you a mothers day present! But I do not care, you still get one, it looks horrible, because I had 4 different things to create a scrabook with, but ohh well :p
 
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