The Rant and I Cannot Say This Out Loud Thread #2

To little puppy: You are stupid. I love you ! Gah, even though you eat dirt from the plants, which is somewhat annoying, but I still love you !

To my phone: I really do hate you. I cannot wait until I get a new phone, after I get paid, and actually get paid a decent amount to have spending money.

To my boyfriends dad: I'm going to smack you across the face with a frying pan. You have no idea the stuff I am dealing with right now...actually, NO idea. I am freaking out, I've never been this scared in my life, and you're telling me I have to 'tough it out' and can't talk to my boyfriend for the night ? This is where I say, f*ck you.

To my boyfriend: Invest in either living closer to me and not with your stupid family, or buy a cellphone. I can't deal with this by myself.

To pasta: Cook faster.

 

To L:
GOD! could you be anymore of a self-absorbed, egotistical, smart-ass bastard? I think no. could you at least pretend to take notes, and that you are on the same intellectual level as the rest of us. You're taking REGULAR classes so you can't be the genius you claim you are. If your that good go do AP and get the hell outta my life. On second thought stay in your regular classes so I don't have to deal with you in Calculus too. I noticed you need extra time to do your exams, so I don't know what your problem is, but deal with it on your own time. If I hear one more of your 'I don't need to study to get the top marks in Chem' rants I'm gonna beat you into the ground with my cell phone! It won't hurt you that much, but it will make me feel better and hopefully stop you from opening your mouth again. ARG! You piss me off to no end!
M

 

To Person A: Please stop messing with me. I've loved you for all the great work you've done but come on. Now you're just bordering on arrogance and annoyance with the cheap tricks you're pulling on me! I know, I know you're just trying to get attention but come on, you don't have to completely squish my heart doing it! It's just a frekin' project! One I'm probably too invested in for my own sake anyway. And this is why, I don't like working with people sometimes. *sigh*

 

To myself: You're silly. Stop changing your avatar on here. I get the urge to change it to a new one every day. :/

To ____: You're stupid. But I love you for that. :lol: But seriously, that was really fucking stupid. Your story was hilarious, though. I wish I could have been there to see it, ahah. Also, I C WUT U DID THAR.

To ____: You're so nice. Why!? I just want to hug you. And your eyes are soo blue. How come I haven't noticed them before? They're really gorgeous. You're a sneaky snake, yes you are. Don't scare me like that again. I have to get you back now. xD

To Mrs. ______: LMFAO. You fail! Ahaha. I can't believe you did that. Probably made my entire day, thanks. How do you even have your job? You're pathetic.

To ____ & ____: O_O Well, hello, there.

 

Dear Customers at work: We are not Psycic!!! No i don't know what sauces you want so when you say "are sauces in there" the answer is no because i can't read your mind.
And please stop at the stupid speaker post... if one care goes past don't follow it stop and let someone take your order, its simple and it works and it means us poor stafff don't get frustrated and watch other peoples food get cold and have to redo it.

And lastly... Not all Mcdonals employees are stupid so don't treat us like we are, I'm in my final year at uni so screw you i'm not some dumb spotty teenager!

 

To evil woman: Just because i don't go to the most expensive private school does not mean i'm poor and stupid. I work at a skate rink because I need money to pay to get my car fixed and other things. I don't have a uber-rich doctor/lawyer husband that pays for everything. Then when your daughter has problems with the skates she hired as the clasp is broken you automatically assume it's my fault. Well it's not. And then you question my abilty to skate just because i fell over. God woman. I hope you don't come back in a hurry.

To C-I actually might like you more than i like myself. You are wonderful. It's such a shame you go out with T. Hes not that great underneath all of that. Hell I would know, I've known him long enough. You deserve better.

To Gr-You have no idea how much i dislike you right now. You are actually so stupid its funny. No offensive but your hardly goodlooking and yet you think your like the next Kate Moss. And if that wasn't bad you've got the biggest God complex ever. You are the most self obessed person ever, you spend 3 HOURS talking about yourself and how much you love your ex bf. Um newsflash you met him via txt and never met him and then you get p!ssy at me when I don't tell you anything, excuse me but I try but your too wrapped um in your own world. I think your hitting on my bf as whenever we have hockey you bat your eyelashes at him and flirt. Go away. Most of our hockey team hates you and your nickname is fat slag. Sorry but if you expect me to be your friend your wrong.

To R-Why are away in Aussie? I need a hug

To J-I am not a physco satanic bitch. Just because i said you creepied me out....

To K-YOU ARE THE BIGGEST PERVERT i have ever met. Get a life retard

To kids I babysat for-Satisfied? You made my Saturday even more crap than it already was. Your horrible and spoilt. Don't expect to babysit you again. You cannot watch Kill Bill. Your mother won't let you so don't say your allowed to.

 

To C - Oh shit I'm sorry sorry I did that at your house. I really hope you don't kill me or anything...

To C & D - But holy crap that was the most fun thing I've ever done on a weekend. We seriously need to do that again. :lol:

To GZ - Come back please. I really miss you.

To PP - Good grief, what the hell do you want? I told you I wouldn't be on today, and yet you still find a reason to yell at me. I'm not your slave.

 

To Person A: Stop climbing down my throat just because I don't happen to share the same view points as you. Yes the whole darn thing is stupid, but I don't like you, so it makes the entire thing even more stupid. You need to stop talking to me pronto, and I wouldn't really mind if you disappeared forever and ever and ever. The problem is that it might actually get boring without you around to snap at all the time. *sigh* Why don't you have a mute button?

To Person B: I love you. You make me happy. We're like...long lost twins or something because we share some obnoxiously cliched form of telepathy. Dang it you need to be here right now so I can give you a hug!

To Person C: Why do you exist? Solely to make me angry and annoyed? Well if so, you continuously serve your purpose in life. Good for you. Not.

To Person D: I hope to god you know what you're doing. If you so much as screw this whole thing up, you know I'll be right there in your face, holding a heavy yet sharp object - as will the other dozen guys who don't like you. But she puts up with you and that's the ONLY reason why we let you hang around.

To Person E: I'm going to believe you. If you don't pull through, too bad, I'm never trusting you again. If you do, I'll just be sceptical of you the next time because that's the kind of person I am. Don't take it personally.

 

To boredom: Leave. I do not like you. You are..well, boring!
To my friend: I am starting to ignore the "dancers". I like my freedom thank you very much. We're two and they are what? 20? Leave them alone. We had our share of fun and also victory but this is getting ridiculous. Following us around the city? Really? Stop it! It is annoying. It amazes me that you say that you have no interest in our lives whatsoever, but you spend 3 hours following us around. Interesting. Next time, I'm calling the police. I'm sick of you morons!
To my parents: Are you serious? I haven't seen you guys in a month, and when I finally come home you say that you have plans, and you leave? Wonderful. I don't complain, but next time when you call me to come to visit make sure that there are no plans involved, as I lied to my boss that I was sick so I could leave work. Yay!
To my eyes: Don't fail me. You have worked well almost 20 years, I don't want glasses. You live inside my head, you should now that I may slip and fall and break many pairs of glasses.
To the city: There are days when I hate you and I want to go wherever the path may lead me, and there are days when I love you. Today does not fall into the latter category. The stupid rain caused me a flu (thank you very much weather!), the idiot cab driver helped me take a bath as he sped right near the sidewalk into a giant lake, I lost almost half of my money because I was in a hurry and I couldn't get them in my wallet the right way.
To my job: Please, oh please get interesting! I don't want to quit, although I hate you, but give me something a tad fun. Please?

 

To life- just when I get everything sorted, it all turns upside down again. Why me? I do not have the time or energy atm to deal with all of this again
To college- Spring break? haha what a joke, when your schedule revision classes all through the holiday that we have to go to- when am I gonna get time off?
To Matt- I can't believe you're being deployed already? and to Afghanistan It's just typical that all the feelings I have for you are coming up now you've told me that. And I can't tell you now because it'll be a distraction for you, and I don't wanna do that to you. And I'm so confused right now I don't know what to do. But please, please be careful and stay safe and just please come back. I wish I could say this to your face but if I do, then I'll probably upset you too, and I just can't do that to you.

 

To__________: Ha! I caught you, loser. Whatcha gonna do now? Run around ranting about me because I don't let you live in your "I rule the world" universe? Too bad.

To__________: I really don't know what to think right now, but I trust you know what you're doing. It's just so hard to believe it's been so long and now all of this? Can't life give us a break for once?

 

Uni, first day back and I already hate you again.

Trains- why must you be delayed. i had to run from the station to uni to stop myself beign pathetically late, and then it took me like 3 hours instead of one to get home. STUPID. and you are sooo expensive. Over £9 for 1 return, only 30 miles away. GRR

 

N:
OH MY GOD! You are the biggest idiot, and most arogant, pig headed, self-centred, high and mighty, bastard I have ever met in my life! And that includes the egotistical know it all that sits beside me in Chem! I cannot believe that you thought it was your responsibility to rat on Allie and Heather on Saturday. You, who takes every possible chance to look like you're working, but really do nothing. You who hides in the Deli cooler to avoid helping customers. You who takes forty minute breaks because you think nobody notices. You of all people had no right to complain about us. And above all you had NO RIGHT to throw away our writing. Just because you think it's a 'waste of time' doesn't mean it is. Doesn't mean you get to throw away our crack induced but still totally awesome paper towel manuscript. That work was going to be editied, flourished and published one day, but NO you had to destroy it because you don't appreciate the art that is alien invasion literature. Why could you not have spent your time getting Eric to work? Or doing what you're supposed to be doing? Instead you have to go and destroy our perfect day by crumpling up our work.
I'm just glad you had the decency to leave me out of this, even though I know you only did that because I've worked here three months longer than you have and you know that Cindy wouldn't have believed you if you told her I wasn't working.
Oh, and just so you know, after they got a pep talk about how they need to stay focused because they can't depend on the guys to do anything around the department, Heather got a raise and makes almost as much as you do now. So take that!
Jack ass.
Sincerely,
M

 

To certain annoying people that will remain un-named: Stop being so annoying! Boo hoo, you didnt get your way, stop whining.

To my dog: Your so cute!
To my other dog: If you dont like me, fine. Just stay away then! Stop growling whenever I pet you. Geeeez what did I ever do to you?

To this smiley :guffaw:: You crack me up :guffaw:
(I just had to add that one )