Road Trip - CSI:Miami - "Crazy Eights"

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He hasn't shot anybody because he hasn't gotten angry enough yet. :devil:

***********

Horatio's house, 7pm

Alena: *sitting at table, poking peas with fork*

Horatio: *sits down, places shades on table*

Alena: *sniffs peas*

Horatio: You haven't touched your food.

Alena: ...It's still frozen uncie H.

Horatio: Uh..Let me get you something else then. *grabs plate, walks into kitchen*

Alena: *grabs shades, puts them on*

Shades slide off Alena's face

Horatio: *walks over, with bread* Here you go.

Alena: ...

Horatio: Eat.

Alena: ...Eat what?

Horatio: The bread.

Alena: ...That's it?

Horatio: ...I'll...Order a pizza.

Alena: *smiles* YAY!

Doorbell rings

Horatio: You sit tight, I'll be right back. *walks to door*

Horatio opens door

Carly: Oh, good you're home.

Horatio: What are you doing here?

Carly: Josh got window cleaner in his eye, so I have to take him to the hospital. You mind watching Ethan for a while? He's too hyper to be in a hospital near machines and...Other people.

Ethan: *runs in*

Horatio: Wait a second, I've already got Alena here.

Carly: Yeah Jess said you offered to babysit.

Horatio: Yes, one child. I never agreed to two.

Carly: I'm sure you'll be fine. I'll be back in a few hours. *leaves*

Horatio: *closes door*

Ethan: *punches Alena*

Alena: *screams*

Horatio: *walks over* Ethan...

Ethan: *looks at Horatio*

Horatio: Sit down please.

Ethan: *sits in chair*

Alena: *rubs arm* Uncie H, he hit me.

Horatio: Ethan, what do you have to say for yourself?

Ethan: *frowning*

Horatio: Ethan...

Ethan: *kicks table*

Alena: UNCIE H, HE'S BEING BAD!

Ethan: *sticks tongue out*

Horatio: Ethan, keep your tongue in your mouth please.

Ethan: *crosses arms*

Alena: Beat him uncie H.

Horatio: Unfortunately, that's not in my job description this evening. Ethan, would you like anything to eat?

Ethan: *shakes head*

Horatio: Anything to drink?

Ethan: *shakes head*

Horatio: Do you want to watch some tv?

Ethan: *shakes head*

Horatio: Okay, then sit here and stop beating up Alena. I'll go order some pizza. *walks down the hall*

Ethan: *staring at Alena*

Alena: *staring at Ethan*

Ethan: *reaches into pocket, pulls out matches*

Alena: What's that?

Ethan: *smirks*

Alena: You're weird.

Ethan: *lights match*

Alena: ...

Ethan: *staring at flame*

Alena: That's gonna burn ya.

Ethan: *blows out match*

Alena: Oh...

Ethan: *lights another match*

Alena: Stop it.

Ethan: *jumps out of chair, walks toward Alena*

Alena: Ethan, no. Ethan!

Ethan: *brings match up to Alena*

Alena: NO! ETHAN STOP IT!

Ethan: *laughing*

Alena: UNCIE H! UNCIE, H!

Horatio: *walks over* What's going on?

Alena: *runs over to Horatio, hugs him* Ethan's being bad.

Horatio: *frowns* Ethan, what were you doing?

Ethan: *puts hands behind back* Nothin'.

Horatio: Ethan...

Ethan: *stares at Horatio*

Horatio: Let me see your hands.

Ethan: *shakes head*

Horatio: Right now, let's go.

Ethan: NO!

Alena: *tugs on Horatio's pants* Uncie H, it's matches.

Horatio: Ethan, give them to me.

Ethan: No.

Horatio: You're going to be sorry if you don't.

Ethan: NO!

Horatio: Hand them over, right now. Come on.

Ethan: *throws matches*

Horatio: Pick them up.

Ethan: *runs into bathroom*

Horatio: Ethan, come here. *follows*

Bathroom

Ethan: *turns around*

Horatio: Ethan, come pick up the matches.

Ethan: *smirks*

Horatio: *frowns*

Ethan: *lifts keys*

Horatio: ....How did you get those?

Ethan: Table.

Horatio: Ethan, give me my k-

Ethan: *drops keys down toilet*

Horatio: NO! N-

Ethan: *presses flusher*

Horatio: *places hands on hips*

Ethan: *waves down at toilet* Bye bye keys.

Horatio: I can't believe this.

Ethan: *runs out of bathroom*

Horatio: *turns around* Ethan, get over here.

Ethan: *opens fridge*

Horatio: Ethan, no, stay out of the f-

Ethan: *throws pickle jar onto the floor, it breaks* Ha.

Horatio: Ethan, stop!

Ethan: *pours mayonaise all over floor*

Horatio: *slips* AH! *falls over*

Alena: *runs over to table*

Ethan: *laughing*

Horatio: *stands* Go sit on the couch and wait for me.

Ethan: No.

Horatio: NOW.

Ethan: *sigh* ...Fine. *walks away*

Alena: *hands Horatio his shades* Here.

Horatio: Thank you sweetheart.

Alena: Ethan's nuts.

Horatio: I'll talk to him, you go play in the other room.

Alena: Okay. *runs away*

Horatio: *sits on couch*

Ethan: *looking at pictures of magazine*

Horatio: You want to tell me what's going on, son?

Ethan: *shakes head*

Horatio: You're about five or six, right?

Ethan: *nods*

Horatio: So you understand that hurting Alena and hurting me, is very wrong.

Ethan: *nods*

Horatio: Why did you bring the matches?

Ethan: *shrugs* They're fun.

Horatio: Fun....Do you think disobeying your parents is fun?

Ethan: *shrugs*

Horatio: There is a behavior expected from you.

Ethan: *ripping magazine pages*

Horatio: Do you act this way around your parents?

Ethan: *nods*

Horatio: Okay.

Ethan: Are you gonna punish me?

Horatio: I might not have to, if you shape up.

Ethan: How?

Horatio: Well...For starters you can clean the mayonaise up off the floor while I call the plumber to get my keys. *whispers* Nice trick by the way, I did that to my dad when I was your age.

Ethan: *smirks*

Horatio: Okay, get to it.

Ethan: *jumps off couch*

Downtown, Aid Facility

Speed: *walks over to front counter*

Woman: *smiles* Can I help you sir?

Speed: I'm looking for a patient.

Woman: I'm sorry, patients cannot be visited until their treatment is completed.

Speed: *places badge on counter*

Woman: ...We also promise our patients that the law will not interfere with their treatment.

Speed: I need to talk to one of your patients, not arrest her.

Woman: No. We have rules here.

Speed: Then I would like some information about the patient.

Woman: I'm sorry we can't divulge that without a warrant.

Speed: Where's her doctor?

Woman: She's in the building.

Speed: I want to speak with her.

Woman: I'm sorry, you'll have to make an appointment.

Speed: Look, it's my ex-wife in there.

Woman: All the more reason why you should stay out.

Speed: Our marriage ended amicably.

Woman: I'm sure it did.

Speed: I just want to check her condition. My boss found her this place, and I drove her here.

Woman: That's very kind of you.

Speed: Can I speak with her?

Woman: No.

Speed: Could I phone her then?

Woman: No.

Speed: *frowns*

Woman: You can come back when she's released.

Speed: When will that be?

Woman: 90 days.

Speed: Can I see her admittance chart?

Woman: Not without a warrant.

Speed: If I start a case on her, I'll get arrested.

Woman: Why?

Speed: I'm the one who bought her drugs.

Woman: *disgusted face* You bought your ex-wife drugs? What kind of sicko are you?

Speed: She was already on them.

Woman: Oh.

Speed: I've been down this road before.

Woman: With her?

Speed: Me, actually.

Woman: You were an addict?

Speed: No, I wanted to kill myself.

Woman: Why?

Speed: It doesn't matter why.

Woman: Do you still want to kill yourself?

Speed: Why, are you recruiting more patients?

Woman: I'm just curious.

Speed: No, I don't.

Woman: Who helped you?

Speed: My ex-wife. I owe her my life.

Woman: *nods* What's her name?

Speed: Katie, she was checked in a few days ago.

Woman: *typing on computer*

Speed: *looks around*

Woman: Ah, here it is. She's in room 24.

Speed: Thanks. *walks away*

Room 24

Speed: *knocks on door*

Katie: *opens door* ...

Speed: Hey.

Katie: *looks down at floor*

Speed: You look a little better.

Katie: Well I have pills to make me stop puking, if that's what you mean.

Speed: Right.

Katie: *walks back into room*

Speed: *follows*

Katie: So how'd you get in here?

Speed: Doesn't matter.

Katie: *walks to bed*

Speed: *grabs Katie's hand*

Katie: *sits, nods*

Speed: So before...In the lounge-

Katie: That wasn't me. I'm sorry.

Speed: It's okay. I should have known something was wrong.

Katie: You couldn't have.

Speed: I'm a cop.

Katie: Yeah but...*holds stomach* Your guard is usually let down around me.

Speed: And how would you know that.

Katie: Because you don't look at me the same as everyone else. Don't worry, I'm not saying you love me, but we this thing and it's not going to go away. We're too close for that.

Speed: Do they stock psychology books in here or something?

Katie: I just know you.

Speed: Apparently.

Katie: So how's everyone?

Speed: They're worried about you.

Katie: *nods*

Speed: Why did you do this?

Katie: ...You ever feel like...Everything you do, isn't good enough? That it's easier to just leave everything in someone else's hands for a while? To just rid yourself of the responsibility?

Speed: *stares at Katie*

Katie: ...People do destructive things to themselves when they feel they don't have any other options.

Speed: You'll always have options.

Katie: Yeah and I'll always have them alone.

Speed: You're not alone.

Katie: I don't have anyone. I left you, my kids are gone, my friends barely talk to me, and...I hate this feeling. I thought maybe if I did something that might make me happy even for a second, then it was worth it. But it's not, because now I feel even worse.

Speed: *wraps arm around Katie*

Katie: *leans head on Speed's shoulder* ...Thanks for being here.

Speed: You'd do the same for me.

Katie: I would?

Speed: Sure. Well, if we were still married.

Katie: Yeah.

Speed: Funny, no matter how many times you break up with me, you still end up in my arms.

Katie: *laughs*

Volvohome, 9pm

Delko: *looking at map* Where are we?

Jess: *driving* We're on the highway.

Delko: *looks at Jess* Yeah but which one?

Jess: The one that goes to California.

Delko: ...

Jess: What? I know where I'm going.

Delko: ...I hate this thing. It's too small and it smells funny.

Jess: It smells fine.

Delko: It smells like decomp.

Jess: It does not. It's probably the air freshener that the dealer put in.

Delko: Where did he get the air freshener? Leaves from a Body Farm?

Jess: I sure hope not.

Delko: So what are we doing first when we get there?

Jess: Well we have to stay in a camp ground tonight.

Delko: Ah man. Not in this thing.

Jess: Yes in this thing. Although I should tell you it has no heating and I forgot the jacks.

Delko: So...The Volvohome will be able to move.

Jess: Not if we don't move.

Delko: That's impossible. What if I have to pee?

Jess: It doesn't have a bathroom.

Delko: It doesn't?

Jess: Nope.

Delko: ...Then where am I supposed to do my business?

Jess: Outside like everyone else.

Delko: I'm not an animal.

Jess: Sure you are....The human kind.

Music starts to play

Jess: Whoa, sorry my knee was on the radio.

Delko: I think you're a little tall for the driver's seat.

Jess: Hey your fat butt couldn't fit either.

Delko: At least I already knew I wouldn't fit.

Jess: What's that supposed to mean?

Delko: Nothing.

Jess: That's it, you're sleeping on the shag carpet tonight, right next to the lava lamp and bell-bottom jeans.

Delko: ...Who owns those jeans?

Jess: It came with the Volvohome as a perk.

Delko: ...Gross.

Carly's house

Carly: Okay Ethan, go get ready for bed.

Ethan: *walks upstairs*

Josh: *walks in*

Carly: Horatio sure controlled him.

Josh: Yeah, he's almost a saint. He didn't even throw anything at my head on the way home.

Carly: How's your eye?

Josh: It's fine.

Carly: Good. I wouldn't want my wonderful husband to go blind.

Josh: *smirks* Why, because then no one would be able to stare at your gorgeous figure and beautiful eyes?

Carly: A lot of people still could. Just not you.

Josh: *sigh* Whew, that would be unfortunate.

Carly: *smiles* Why?

Josh: *kisses the back of Carly's hand*

Carly: *laughs*

Josh: *winks*

Carly: Ah man, we should have left all the kids with Horatio.

Josh: Too bad, huh.

Carly: *sigh*

TBC.....................
 
Ah, things seem to be much better for the couples now. Oh, poor Katie, *hugs* you've had it way too rough lately. It'll be okay, I'm sure. Good job, Geni! Hey, now that I have my lap top back, I may be able to get on every night. :D
 
What an awesome update. The entire scene with Horatio and the kids was pure genius, and hilairious. I couldn't stop laughing at the sight of Horatio running around( oddly controlled) with his head chopped off. I could also see Alena with his sunglasses on and them sliding off her nose. What a cute scene. Ethan is just crazy. But Horatio sure got that together,.... real quick.


I knew the trip with Jess and Eric was going to go just like that. Hilarity will ensue from that point on I'm willing to bet. Those two... who knows where they are going to end up at... And Volvohome... Poor Eric has been spoiled with the Hummerhome and it's vast facilities.:lol:


Speed visiting Katie was just wonderful. I'm glad that she is doing better, and that they still have this thing between them that will never die (when you are that close, it's hard to just let go is my opinion. But I hasten to say, a happy marriage is all I'm looking for. Is that selfish or what?). But that being said, I'm glad he was there for her, and maybe she will be making a comeback soon.

The update was fab, as always. Waiting for more, patiently , of course :D
 
*sings* All by mysellllf. Don't wanna be...all by mysellllf. :lol: Now Carly and Josh are all happy and I sit still in my tensed up relationship. Is it still a relationship? lol

Update Soon. :)
 
Okay, I have loooootttsa stuffs to say :p.

Let's go in order, shall we? Start with H-man. Actually, let's start with an RT related story.

Rob: Where is my periodic table?
Me: *had seen it there about ten minutes before* It's behind you.
Rob: *looks at me, takes periodic table from behind him*
Me: I know all
Rob: You're not God, he knows all.
Me: *thinks* Horatio is God, he knows all :p

Okay, now for the review. H would be a GREAT father. It'd be really cool to see him father a child in the future, RT or on TV lol. Alena is ADORABLE with him. I love how she calls him Uncie H! SO CUTE! and, my next point, I haven't brought up since about a month ago, but SEE CARLY! I told you Ethan was the devil, and you tried to prove me wrong, but I think that this evidence suggests beyond a reasonable doubt that Ethan is possessed by the devil :p

Alena: That's gonna burn ya.
Click to expand...
Did anyone else recognize the accent? Yep, that's a Jersey girl/NY accent she's got there. I can't wait to see how she grows up! I couldn't be more proud of her..........and she's not even real.....haha.

Speed and Katie. I LOVE the interaction between these two. It implies that they still care for each other, and that's not gonna change, yet Speed is a married man, and he's going to stay that way. But poor Katie, I'm glad she's getting better though. Personally, I don't think this storyline could have been any more clean, or any more beautifully written. That was my favorite section of the whole update.

Jess/Delko. Do I see a breakdown in the near future? I don't know what you have planned or even if you have anything planned, but if I were to guess, I see a breakdown on Jess' part.

You know those sort of people that are all cheery cheery and then the other person tries to point out what is wrong, and the cheery person is just so optimistic? Yeah, that would be me. Then, when everything falls apart, and the cheery person has nothing left to look up to, they totally break down and admit that everything sucks and because it was their idea, it was stupid and all that good stuff........but you know, I could have explained all of that for no reason and I could be wrong. But you know.......whatever lol. Overall, I would like to see them have a bit of fun on the trip, hopefully you can fit that in for whatever you have planeed :p

Carly/Josh So cute. I love these two. They honestly couldn't be a better pair, though I question them as parents :p Let me tell you, Delko+Speedle= DISASTER haha

Great update Geni, I can't wait to see some more!
 
SHE CALLED HIM UNCLE!! :D

What do you mean he's not angry enough yet?! That Hummer incident....oh. OH! Heh heh heh :devil: Can't wait Geni.

I can actually picture a little Horatio fluching keys down a toilet... :D

Poor Katie! *huggles*

NO I DON NOT THINK YOU SHOULD OF LEFT ALL THE KIDS WITH HOARTIO. Have you gone mad woman?!

Great part! I still wish i could quote. :(

PS, Genevieve (sp), i get 2 more posts until i have 1000 posts. I'm gonna set it up so i have my first post as Pathologist in your fic. :) Yes, i love it that much. *hug Geni to pieces*
 
awwwwwwwwww Geni that update was just beautiful!!all the different sections-mixture of humour and poingance(sp??) just beautiful...
Man Alive, is Ethan's middle name Damian??Bless Alena trying to be all good! but look at how Ethan has turned...Horatio is SUPER NANNY!!!!

Speed and Katie-just beautiful. I love it when Speed is being all sensitive and you know what??I'm not smelling trouble, Speed is awwwwwwwww so-DA MAN!!!!and Katie *joins in huggles* I'm sure you'll be ok soon *cough* right Geni *cough* ;)

and Jess and Eric....:lol::lol: *looks round room and see lava lamp AND bell bottom jeans in drawer* *hangs head in shame*

and Josh and Carly are ok....WOOOO
awww this made me feel all nice. Thanks cause I know my day at work is going to be solid today!

Update soooon as possible Geni :D
 
Wow! Thanks guys, it means a lot to know that y'all like the storylines. :D

And Hunter, congrats on the numbers. ;)

Jess, you crack me up, you really do.

Anni, you are so awesome! *huggles* :D

Colton, I will put you in there in the next couple of chapters, lol.

************

Hallways, Miami lab, one week later

Horatio: Mister Wolfe, progress on the case.

Ryan: Alexx managed to find a bullet inside the vic. I ran the casing through IBIS, and got a hit. Melvin Atwater. *hands over paper* He was put in prison about two years ago for theft and assault with a weapon.

Horatio: When does he get out?

Ryan: He was released two weeks ago.

Horatio: Hmm, so he could have definitely made our victim swallow the gun.

Ryan: Yeah he could have stabbed him too. I was looking at the knife in comparison with everything on the boat, and I didn't find a matching set. The knife didn't belong to the victim so I figure the killer must have brought it in.

Horatio: You get any prints off of it?

Ryan: No but I was looking at the knife this morning and found some dried blood on the inside of the hilt. I sent it to Valera.

Horatio: Good work. *walks away*

Ryan: *nods*

Calleigh: *walks over* Ryan, we need a word.

Ryan: *turns around* Hey Calleigh.

Calleigh: There was Trace on the gun and I asked you to collect it. I just got back from Tim and he says he never recieved it.

Ryan: Uh...There was Trace on the gun?

Calleigh: Yes, do you remember I was telling you to make sure not to destroy any other potential evidence while collecting it?

Ryan: ...No, Calleigh you never told me anything about Trace.

Calleigh: I did, I remember telling you that.

Ryan: You didn't tell me anything.

Calleigh: Okay, look, I know you're new and you don't want to mess up on your first investigation, but you have to tell me the truth. I won't be mad.

Ryan: You're already mad! Cal, you never told me anything about Trace, I swear it.

Calleigh: Ryan, you need to tell me right now why you didn't collect it. Did you forget? Maybe you couldn't find it?

Ryan: I'd tell you but you never told me about any Trace. You had the gun, remember?

Calleigh: Come on, let's go to Trace.

Ryan: Fine.

Trace Lab

Calleigh: *walks in*

Ryan: *walks in*

Calleigh: Tim, I told Ryan to collect the Trace right outside of the Trace Lab, right?

Speed: Uh...Not that I remember, no.

Calleigh: What? Come on, I told him to collect it off the gun and send it to you for analysis.

Speed: I think if you had said that, I would have heard it.

Calleigh: Come on Tim, we're on the same team.

Speed: I realize that but you didn't say anything to Wolfe about any Trace.

Calleigh: I did. He was standing right there.

Speed: *looks at Ryan*

Ryan: *looks at Speed*

Calleigh: Come on guys! I asked someone to collect it.

Speed: Why didn't you do it?

Calleigh: I had a lunch date.

Speed: ...You had a lunch date.

Calleigh: ...

Speed: Wow, wrong thing to say to your superior.

Calleigh: What?

Speed: You disregarded evidence to go on a lunch date while the gun was left in the ballistic lab unprocessed. It isn't Wolfe's responsibility to look after evidence, it's yours.

Calleigh: I told him to collect it!

Speed: Between you and Wolfe arguing over it, the gun could have been processed by now. You know what, I'll do it myself. *takes off labcoat, leaves*

Ryan: *crosses arms*

Calleigh: ...I don't know what happened, I could have sworn I told you. Maybe I was just thinking of telling you.

Ryan: Well you didn't.

Calleigh: *sigh* Great, and now Stetler's going to hear about it.

Ryan: That IAB guy?

Calleigh: Yeah. *sigh* I was so stupid. I know not to leave the evidence unprocessed.

Ryan: It's okay, Speedle's getting it.

Calleigh: I was supposed to collect the Trace.

Ryan: Cal, it's not your fault. People make mistakes, right?

Calleigh: IAB doesn't see it that way. I'm already treading on thin ice with them because of my boyfriend's rap sheet.

Ryan: You two made up?

Calleigh: That's why we went on the lunch date, to work things out.

Ryan: And did you?

Calleigh: We had another argument, so I came back to the lab to cool off.

Ryan: Well don't worry, we'll get things fixed.

Calleigh: *smirks* Thanks Ryan.

TBC.............
 
*smirks* AH! Geni, you're rubbing off on me. :lol: She went out to lunch with me. :D *"accidentally" skipped over the arguing part* ;) :lol:

No problem Geni, just remember to: Update Soon. :D
 
Great update. What's up with Calleigh forgetting to tell Wolfe about the evidence? That is sooooooooo not Calleigh. Hey, and check Speed out, he's being all supervisory... Ain't it cool? :D Gotta love the guy... Superior update, Geni! Waiting for more :lol:
 
See, Stetler was murdered in thread 1. :lol: Ah well. :D

And Ryan not being idiotic, damn. :lol:

By the way, WHEN IS SPEED GONNA SHOOT RYAN? Or at least punch him? :lol:

(Don't stop with the Mister Wolfe Geni! :D)

(Nope not 1000 posts yet! But coming soon...)
 
Oh, Ethan is not the devil, jeez. They're what, five? Don't you remember being that age, thats what happens, the boys pick on the girls and then the teachers yell at the boys. And besides, he's a Speedle and she's a Delko, so they're genetically prediposed to fight :lol: But Horatio sure seemed to straighten him out so see, no harm no foul.

Aww, yay, the tension is gone with me and Joshie. At least I think ;) But poor Colton and Calleigh. Calleigh is losing her mind, and Colton is still...ok, I really didn't have a have to end that sentence :lol:

Hm, Calleigh seems to be under a lot of stress. I mean, I know what she means, I forget to tell people stuff all the time, but thats just my bad memory. Aww, I hope she and Colton work things out, they are so cute together!

please update soon!
 
:lol: Colton. *huggles*

**********

On the highway

Delko: *looking at map* I'm telling you, you missed the turn.

Jess: I didn't miss the turn.

Delko: It was two miles ago.

Jess: It was not two miles ago. That was an access road.

Delko: No that was an exit.

Jess: Access road.

Delko: Exit.

Jess: Access road.

Delko: Exit.

Jess: ACCESS ROAD!

Delko: EXIT!

Jess: Eric, I'm not lost.

Delko: I didn't say you were lost, I said you took the wrong turn.

Jess: I didn't take any turn.

Delko: Exactly. We were supposed to turn.

Jess: No we weren't.

Delko: I'm looking at the map right now, and it says to turn left on Junction 24.

Jess: Well the map is wrong.

Delko: It's not wrong.

Jess: Where did you buy it?

Delko: A homeless man in Arkansas.

Jess: The map is wrong.

Delko: Oh come on, he was giving them away.

Jess: Yeah because the maps are wrong.

Delko: Um, the map isn't wrong.

Jess: Do you want to drive?

Delko: Yes.

Jess: Too bad.

Delko: You know, the man is supposed to drive and the woman is supposed to be looking at the map making sure the man doesn't get lost.

Jess: *presses breaks*

Volvohome stops

Delko: ...Jess we're in the middle of the highway.

Jess: Was that a sexist comment?

Delko: ...No.

Jess: *narrows eyes*

Delko: I heard it on tv and I copied it.

Jess: You're not three.

Delko: I still heard it on tv. It was on a sitcom.

Jess: And what did the wife do in the sitcom?

Delko: She hit the husband over the head with a rubber mallet.

Jess: *lifts brow* What?

Delko: Oh wait, maybe that was a dream. I remember Fred Flinstone being there. He was eating Dino's arm and Barney was watching Titanic on the stone television.

Jess: *presses gas pedal*

Delko: Man that dream was so weird. You were in it. You were Wilma.

Jess: *looks at Eric*

Delko: ...Maybe this wasn't the best time to bring it up.

Jess: You think?

Delko: Sorry.

Jess: I think the air freshener is getting to your head.

Delko: I'm actually getting used to it. It kind of tingles the nose. *rubs nose*

Jess: *rolls eyes*

Delko: So where's my teddy?

Jess: Taped to the roof.

Delko: 0_0

Jess: He needed some fresh air.

Delko: NO! NO HE DOESN'T! He's probably scared to death! *runs to exit hatch on roof, opens it*

Jess: Eric, you're letting the air in.

Delko: *grabs teddy* Oh thank God he's okay. *kisses teddy*

Jess: Haha you kissed a guy bear.

Delko: *frowns, hugs teddy* We have a complicated relationship.

Jess: Now I feel a little jelous.

Delko: No one could take your place, not even my teddy.

Jess: Good to know.

Delko: I just...Like the feel of his fur.

Jess: ...Too much information.

Calleigh's house

Calleigh: *opens door*

Colton: Hi.

Calleigh: *smirks* Hi.

Colton: I thought I'd come over and apologize.

Calleigh: You don't need to apologize to me.

Colton: I was an ass.

Calleigh: It's okay, really.

Ryan: *walks over* Who's at the door?

Colton: *looks at Ryan*

Calleigh: ...

Ryan: Hey, I heard about you. You're Colton.

Colton: *frowns* Who the hell are you.

Ryan: Ryan Wolfe. *extends hand*

Calleigh: Colton, Ryan's just staying here until he can get a place.

Ryan: Oh! Oh you think her and I...No, no way. We're not...No. *waves hands* No way.

Colton: *eye twitches*

Ryan: Seriously, I'm just bunking here for a while.

Colton: So that's what they're calling it these days.

Calleigh: It's nothing. Nothing's going on between us, I swear.

Colton: Then why does he have your toothbrush?

Calleigh: What? *looks at Ryan*

Ryan: *holding toothbrush*

Calleigh: EW! *grabs toothbrush*

Ryan: Sorry.

Colton: So, he's your new puppy or something?

Ryan: Excuse me?

Colton: I wasn't talking to you.

Ryan: Well it sure seemed like you were talking about me.

Colton: Why don't you go home.

Ryan: I don't have one.

Colton: I'm sure the street will welcome you back with open arms.

Ryan: That's impossible. Streets don't have arms.

Colton: They will when I rip you apart.

Calleigh: Guys! Can we cut it out, please?

Ryan: He's the one getting all defensive!

Colton: Yeah well you're the one sleeping in my girlfriend's house!

Calleigh: Both of you stop! Ryan, get out. Colton, get out. I don't want to see any of you. *pushes Ryan outside, slams door*

Front lawn

Colton: *frowning*

Ryan: ...Man I left my burrito in there.

Colton: AAAAAGH! *punches Ryan*

Ryan: AH! *falls*

Colton: *jumps on top of Ryan* I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!

Ryan: NOT UNLESS I GET THERE FIRST!

Colton: *strangling Ryan* DIE!

Ryan: *kicks Colton in his danger zone*

Colton: *screams, falls backwards*

Ryan: *grabs Colton, punches him in the face*

Colton: OW! *rips Ryan's shirt*

Ryan: MY SHIRT! *rips Colton's shirt* HA!

Automatic sprinklers switch on

Colton: *punches Ryan*

Ryan: *punches Colton*

Calleigh: *opens door* ...

Colton: *kicks Ryan*

Ryan: *head butts Colton*

Colton: AH! *falls over*

Calleigh: *clears throat*

Ryan/Colton: *look at Calleigh*

Calleigh: ...Could y'all put some clothes on please?

Colton: *looks down*

Ryan: *looks down*

Calleigh: *smiles*

Colton: *crosses arms, gets into car, drives away*

Ryan: YEAH YOU KEEP DRIVING!

Apartment

Doorbell rings

Anni: *in towel* I have the door! *runs to door, opens it* Mom! Hi!

Mom: Why are you wearing a towel?

Anni: I was in the shower.

Mom: *looks around* ...Kill any rats recently?

Anni: *rolls eyes* Come on in.

Mom: *walks in, places finger on small table* Dusty place, isn't it?

Anni: Why are you here?

Mom: I came to apologize for my behavior the last time we spoke. I wasn't exactly supportive.

Anni: No, you weren't.

Mom: I hope you can forgive me.

Anni: We'll see.

Mom: *sits in chair, looks around* Your father and I have decided to sell the house back in England.

Anni: Why?

Mom: Your father has a new job in the United States. It wouldn't be practical to keep a house across the other side of the world. I was thinking that maybe you could buy it.

Anni: *laughs* Um, I don't think we have the money for that.

Mom: How much does that brute of a husband make anyway?

Anni: That's not really any of your business.

Mom: Where is the lad?

Anni: The shower.

Mom: ...But you said you were in the shower. You have two showers?

Anni: ...So why did you want to sell me the house?

Mom: Our family has to own something that will last generations.

Anni: I'm not really interested in a mansion.

Mom: Oh rubbish, you used to live there.

Anni: I like my life here.

Mom: You could have an even better one in England.

Anni: What's wrong with how I'm living now?

Mom: Nothing. I just think, you need to set some priorities if you're going to have a family.

Anni: I don't want a family.

Mom: Who will carry on our name?

Anni: No one.

Mom: Did you know it took me twenty minutes to find the lift around here? The building is dreadful. You need a more secure and private place.

Anni: Thanks for the advice.

Mom: *pulls out cigarettes*

Anni: Uh, please don't light that.

Mom: What's one more stench in here?

Anni: I'd prefer you do that outside.

Mom: *mumbles* Lord it's impossible to light a fag around these American cities.

Anni: *rolls eyes*

Mom: So where's your stairs?

Anni: There are none.

Mom: You only have one floor?

Anni: Well I could drill a hole into the ceiling and scare the neighbors but I don't think they'd appreciate that.

Mom: *sigh* It's a shame.

Anni: What.

Mom: Your accent. It's so...American.

Anni: Is that a problem?

Mom: Not at all. It's just that you Americans never pronounce anything correctly, is all.

Anni: *frowns*

Speed: *walks over* Who was at the d....Oh. You.

Mom: *stands* How are you dear.

Speed: *frowns*

Mom: *shrugs* I was only being polite.

Anni: Mother, I forgive you and I don't want the house. Can you leave now?

Mom: Let me ask him something. Do you want a family?

Speed: *looks at Anni*

Anni: *lifts brow*

Speed: Uh...Whatever Anni wants is fine.

Mom: I asked you what you wanted.

Speed: It's kind of a touchy subject, actually.

Mom: Why?

Speed: Get out.

Mom: *nods slowly* Point taken. Anni, I'll see you later. *nods* Timothy. *walks out*

Anni: I'm sorry.

Speed: It's okay.

Anni: She always sticks her nose into everything.

Speed: Hmm, kind of reminds me of someone I know.

Anni: *laughs* That's not getting you any points with me.

Speed: Oh we have a point system now?

Anni: *smiling* Yeah.

Speed: How many do I have?

Anni: None. *walks away*

Speed: *lifts brow*

TBC...............
 
OMG! GENI! I FREAKING LOVE YOU! I GOT TO FIGHT WITH RYAN! OMG! I AM LIKE SO ECSTATIC! *hugs Geni supertight* That was an awesome update. :D Hey, it was a rational conclusion. Plus, I hate Ryan. :lol: I loved the Jess/Delko scene. (got it right that time. ;) :lol:)

UPDATE SUPER DUPER SOON! :D
 
Fantastic update! I was laughing soooooooooo hard at it all. All of it was ridiculously hysterical. From The RoadTrip from Hell with Eric and Jess as your tour guides, to the fight that turned obsecene in one sprinlker moment, to the meeting of the English mother and her American daughter who doesn't seem to care a rats ass about what she thinks, ALL of it was hilairous!!! It's kinda cool that I'm a undercover brit. ( you know, when mom said something about England, I instantly thought about that raisin bran crunch commerical where the dude says he loves the box becaues there is a little saying that is hidden, "ello govenor.." ....Don't ask, I'm insane, didn't you already know that? ;))

Ok now that I'm back from my break from reality, I also loved the little give and take with Speed and my self...Such cuteness, I thought I was going to giggle myself to death. Something tells me that there will be talk of another Speedle child, no? Of course, as always, I could be wrong... just speculation and conjuncture on my part....Anywhoo... Awesome update! :D
 
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