Thanks
Lora.
Congrats on the 1000 posts by the way.
And Katie's back!
*Huggles*
And Colton, you haven't been forgotten!
Anni, it hasn't quite been worked out yet, but you'll see what I mean anyway, lol.
************
Hummerhome, on the road, two hours later
Katie: *sitting on couch* I can't believe you busted me out of there.
Calleigh: Ah you're fine.
Katie: *lifts brow* They didn't think so.
Calleigh: We think so.
Missy: This is so much fun. None of this made sense and YET WE DID IT!
JC: I feel like a million bucks!
Missy: You don't even
have a million bucks.
JC: I feel like twenty bucks!
Missy: Better.
Calleigh: So where are we off to?
Horatio: Louisiana.
Calleigh: OH GOOD! I'm from there!
Horatio: We'll be staying in an insane asylum.
Speed: Is that supposed to be a joke? Because it isn't funny.
Horatio: Relax, it's abandoned.
Speed: Not funny.
Katie: Um...I don't want to stay in a big scary happy home.
Anni: Me neither.
Jess: How did we get back from California so fast?
Delko: Oh I drove back when you were asleep. No biggie.
Jess: *frowns*
Carly: Okay that doesn't make sense.
Katie: It's a fic! It doesn't have to!
Carly: What?
Katie: ...Nevermind.
Josh's house
Josh: Alena! Get back here! Ethan! Put that fire out!
Cait: Daddy they're not listening.
Josh: *sigh* I know.
Cait: What do ya want me to do?
Josh: Just...Be a good girl.
Cait: Okay. *grabs Ethan* Come on, sit here at watch some tv. *turns on tv*
Ethan: *watches tv*
Cait: *puts Alena on the couch* Watch.
Alena: *watches tv*
Cait: Okay, done.
Josh: ...How did you do that?
Cait: I dunno.
Josh: Man I love you.
Cait: *smiles* YAY.
Josh: *sits on couch*
Cait: *jumps up onto couch*
Josh: So how was your day at school?
Cait: It's saturday, daddy.
Josh: Oh right. Sorry.
Cait: Sheesh.
Josh: *laughs*
Cait: Uncie Timmy said you used to be gay.
Josh: *blank stare*
Cait: He said that means you used to love boys.
Josh: ....
Cait: Why did you love boys?
Josh: Uh...Well sweetheart, if there's one thing you need to learn about life, is that it's okay to love anyone.
Cait: It is?
Josh: Yes.
Cait: But...Boys can't have babies.
Josh: You know what? I think it's time for dinner. Want to help me make it?
Cait: Yup!
Kitchen
Josh: *opens cupboards*
Cait: So how come you love girls again?
Josh: Uh...Like I said, it doesn't matter who you love, as long as you love them.
Cait: Oh. What's sex?
Josh: *drops pots*
Cait: *looks down at pots*
Josh: Where did your mother go again?
Cait: Road trip.
Josh: Oh great...She left me here alone...With my nine year old child and this topic.
Cait: *smiles*
Josh: It's not really something you need to know yet, Cait.
Cait: Why?
Josh: Because I don't explain things very well.
Cait: Oh.
Josh: Excuse me for a second. *grabs phone, dials*
Hummerhome
Missy: GIVE IT BACK!
JC: NO!
Missy: IT'S MY PEN YOU PEN STEALING FIRE BREATHING DRAGON!
JC: I AM NOT A DRAGON!
Cellphone rings
Speed: *grabs phone*
JC: NO I WANT TO SCRIBBLE FOR A WHILE!
Missy: NO IT'S MY TURN!
Megan: You guys stock pile guns in the closet and you don't bring more than one pen?
Speed: *opens phone* Yeah it's Speed.
Miami
Josh: Help me, help me, help me, help me.
Speed: With what?
Josh: Cait.
Speed: What's wrong with Cait?
Josh: She just asked me THE question.
Speed: Oooh. I have no idea what you're talking about.
Josh: THE question, Tim.
Speed: ...She wants to marry you?
Josh: No! You know that thing that parents have to go through.
Speed: ...Ulcers?
Josh: No, she asked me about that word.
Speed: Ooooh. What word?
Josh: THAT word.
Speed: Okay let's jump onto the same page for a minute. What word.
Josh: The one that starts with an S and ends with an X. It has a an E in the middle.
Speed: Oh good lord, Josh.
Josh: What?
Speed: You're so juvenile.
Josh: What do I do? I don't know how to give THE TALK.
Speed: Stop giving emphasis on everything.
Josh: Sorry. Didn't you have to do that with Lori?
Speed: ...No I think she pretty much learned all of that on her own.
Josh: Oh. How about Holly?
Speed: Josh, just tell her the truth.
Josh: You're no help.
Speed: You're welcome.
Josh: Yeah yeah yeah. *hangs up phone*
Cait: Who was that?
Josh: No one.
Hummerhome
Missy: *smacks JC*
JC: *starts to cry*
Horatio: Okay children, let's stop hurting each other for five minutes.
Hummerhome hits a bump
Katie: AH! *falls backwards*
Horatio: Oops, we bottomed out.
Calleigh: Stop hitting all of the potholes.
Horatio: I can't, this is four wheel drive. I can do ANYTHING.
Anni: *frowning*
Katie: *sitting on Speed's lap*
Speed: *stares blankly* Alright this is one hundred percent not my fault.
Anni: *glares*
Katie: Haha...Um...
Anni: GET OFF OF HIM!
Katie: Good deal. *stands*
Anni: *grabs Speed by the hair* You love ME, you got that? ME!
Speed: Yes dear.
Katie: *sits in dinette* Colton, there you are.
Colton: Here I am. I wasn't forgotten, nope I wasn't.
Anni: *slaps Speed*
Speed: OW! What was that for?
Anni: You glanced at Calleigh.
Speed: So?
Anni: YOU JUST GLANCED AT MISSY!
Speed: Good God, there are more women in here than men, I don't really have a lot of options will you calm down?
Anni: Sorry. I'm just a little territorial. I should have mentioned that.
Horatio: You know what's fun? Staying quiet.
Calleigh: That's not very fun.
Horatio: Sure it is. You get to breathe through your nose, and listen to the rustling of the curtains via the A/C.
Calleigh: ...
Miami, after dinner
Cait: Daddy, can we get a puppy?
Josh: Uh, no.
Cait: Why?
Josh: They're messy.
Cait: I'll take care of it.
Josh: That's what they all say until it craps all over the floor and I have to clean it up.
Cait: Oh. Can we get a cat?
Josh: Those shed.
Cait: ..Parrot?
Josh: Too loud.
Cait: Mouse?
Josh: Too diseased.
Cait: Rhino?
Josh: Too big.
Cait: Lion?
Josh: Sweetheart, enough.
Cait: Sorry.
Alena: *screams*
Ethan: *cackles*
Josh: Ethan, leave Alena alone.
Ethan: *frowns*
Josh: Now.
Ethan: *rolls eyes*
Alena: Ha.
Ethan: *punches Alena*
Alena: *starts to cry*
Josh: *stands, grabs Ethan*
Ethan: *screams*
Josh: Go to your room, right now.
Ethan: NO!
Josh: NOW!
Ethan: Ergh! *kicks Josh*
Josh: You want a kick in the butt? Is that what you want? Because I'll be more than happy to bruise your keister.
Ethan: *runs upstairs*
Josh: *sigh*
Alena: *sniffs*
Josh: *walks over* Are you okay?
Alena: *nods*
Cait: Ethan's sitting on the stairs daddy.
Josh: *turns around*
Ethan: *frowning*
Josh: ...
Ethan: *smirks*
Josh: Ethan, what did you do?
Ethan: *runs back upstairs*
Josh: *follows*
Upstairs, Josh's room
Ethan: *lights match*
Josh: Ethan, stop.
Ethan: *throws match onto bed*
Match touches bed covered in vaseline, catches on fire
Josh: *grabs Ethan* Are you insane!
Ethan: *laughing*
Josh: *picks up Ethan, runs downstairs*
Kitchen
Josh: *sets Ethan on floor* Cait, take him outside and grab Alena.
Cait: Why?
Josh: Just go.
Cait: *grabs Ethan and Alena, runs outside*
Josh: *grabs fire extinguisher, runs upstairs*
Outside
Cait: *turns around*
Ethan: *pushes Alena*
Alena: *falls over* NO! *starts to cry*
Cait: *smacks Ethan* Knock it off.
Ethan: OW. *rubs head*
Alena: *crying*
Cait: *kneels* You okay?
Alena: *hugs Cait*
Cait: It's okay, he's just mean.
Ethan: *kicks grass in Alena's face*
Alena: *screams*
Cait: HEY! Stop it.
Josh's room
Curtains catch fire
Josh: Ah! *points extinguisher at curtains*
Fire spreads to armoir and then wallpaper
Josh: *backs up* Oh crap.
Fire engulfs room
Josh: *backs out of room* Um...Well this is a dilly of a pickle.
Smoke fills the hall
Josh: *coughs* Oh great. *coughing*
Outside
Cait: *looks at house* Why isn't he out yet?
Alena: *shrugs*
Ethan: HA.
Cait: *runs back to house*
Ethan: *pushes Alena over*
Alena: *screams*
Inside house
Josh: *coughing, drops fire extinguisher down the stairs*
Cait: *crawls into house* Daddy! Daddy where are you!
Josh: *falls over*
Cait: *crawls upstairs* Daddy! Daddy!
Josh: *closes eyes*
Cait: Daddy! *crawls over to Josh* Daddy, are you okay? *pokes Josh* Daddy?
Josh: *coughs*
Cait: Daddy I'm gonna call 9-1-1 okay? *grabs Josh's cellphone, dials* ......Yup, I need some firemen here pronto. Um, somewhere in Coconut grove....The house that's on fire. It's gonna be easy to find. Okay? Okay. *drops phone* Come on daddy, we have to go.
Josh: *reaches for Cait*
Cait: *grabs Josh's hand*
Josh: *squeezes Cait's hand*
Cait: ...Daddy?...Come on we have to go. *drags Josh down the stairs* Ugh! You're so heavy. You gotta stop eating so darn much. *coughs*
Sirens are heard
Cait: *coughs* Oh good daddy, *coughs* The firemen are here.
Josh: *whispers* Cait...
Cait: What?
Josh: *coughs* Get...Out.
Cait: Why?
Josh: Go.
Cait: Okay daddy. *runs downstairs, out of house*
Beams fall, wood cracks
Josh: *flinches*
Wood crashes onto floor
Firemen run in
Outside
Cait: *grabs Alena, walks across street* You'll be safe over here, okay?
Alena: *nods*
Ethan: *runs over* Ha.
Cait: Why'd you do that?
Ethan: *shrugs* It's fun.
Ambulance pulls up, paramedics get out and run into the house
Cait: *stares at house*
Inside house
Fireman: *grabs Josh* Come on.
Josh: Wh-Where are my kids. *coughs*
Fireman: They're outside, they're safe.
Josh: *coughing*
Fireman: Try to breathe normally.
Josh: *frowns*
Outside
Fireman: *runs out* They'll take you.
Paramedic: *grabs Josh*
Roof collapses, firemen grab hoses
Josh: *lays on gurney*
Cait: *runs over* Daddy! Daddy are you okay?
Josh: *coughing*
Paramedic: *hands over oxygen mask* Put this on.
Cait: Is he okay?
Paramedic: We'll figure that out.
Cait: *starts to cry*
Josh: *opens eyes, looks at Cait*
Cait: *crying*
Josh: *takes off oxygen mask* It's *coughs* okay, Cait.
Cait: *looks at Josh*
Josh: I'll be okay.
Cait: *nods*
Paramedic: Put this back on please.
Josh: Yeah.
TBC......................
