From the Mouth of High School

Oh, i got loads..these are what my teachers said in class, but i don't think i can put them all out.. i've got them written on a sheet of paper *smirk* we always have those lines circulated around the whole school. ENJOY

Maths class:
"I'll let you work on yourself..."(you want us to take ourselves apart and try to stick them back together?)
".. you have to convince yourself that it is a pyramid"
".. and then you meditate about this question"
"I was young few times ago"
"No asking, just listen to the board. Better do some maths than talking under the chair. close your mouth, and if you have anything to say, push up your hand." (lol, what da heck)

Religious Knowledge Class:
"Do you know where Turkey is? It's in today's Turkey"
"What is the sex of the baby boy?"

History Class:
"Maybe i am going to insult some teachers..."(consult)
"Fighting is against people and people"

Geography Class:
"You don't have to be observant, just look more carefully."
"The very primitive people living in primitive areas used primitive farming methods and primitive tools"
"Chinese creates temptation..." (the teacher was referring to us revising for a Chinese test in her lesson)
"You stand next to a geyser (a ground hole which sprouts steam), you think it's a well, you look inside, and then the steam comes out, you are cooked. You become meat."

Chemistry Class:
"There are some scientist found in outer space..."
"This is the unpredictable nature of mother nature..."
"Women are like (the way) electrons (move), very unpredictable."

Art Class"
"I was caught by a teacher when i was coming up." (meaning that when she came up to the art room, she met a teacher and started chatting with her, so she was late)

Economics class:
(someone was day dreaming in class) "You are always dreaming! I want to dedicate a song to you! DREAM DREAM DREAM. DREEEEAM~"

btw, my school is in Hong Kong
Hahaha! Those are awesome no_reaction! Dream...hahaha! So funny! And women are like electrons, it's true you know. Hehehe... *runs away!*
These are all funny :lol:
I just thought of a good one from a few years back...

This was in tech ed:
Me and my computer partner were working on the electricity section, and we had to write down a lot of notes from the program on the computer. So, we got to the part about wire strippers and their use...and my partner tried to abbreviate it, but ended up writing: "proper use of a stripper" hahaha :lol: We were like, wait a minute, we should probably change that! It was so funny.
on an honor choir trip:
cole: mrs. mazotta's hot.
me: she's old enough to be your mother.
cole: i don't of my fantasies involves her...and her daughters.
mrs. murphy: how 'bout them yankees?

mr. swanson(right after his divorce): the woman always gets the child.

matt: i read an article where this guy says that all the bad things that happen in america are gay people's fault.
mr. tymchuk: matt, i blame you for hurricane katrina.

mr. tymchuk: people follow those who they idolize...we have chase over here, who worships britney spears....

mr. gross(the new principal): i think not going to the bathroom builds character.....

mr. wright: i'm sure you've all seen csi...
cody: i like the one where the guy's face is ripped off.

mr. gross: have a good day, or not...the choice is yours...

mr. fulps: J.R. do you know what happens when you let go of the bat and it hits me? *then he chucks the bat at J.R.*
Today I was in art class and my friend and I were talking to this guy (I don't know his name) but this was our conversation:

Amelia: Did you cut your hair?
Kid: No, why?
Me and Amelia: It looks different!
Kid:Oh, no, I just brushed it today!

Austin: *Laughs*
Amelia: I'm in love with your laugh! Can I marry your laugh?!
my friend looks out the window...; damn that guy has a belly
other friend: we all have bellies.. *yawn*

just the great way the latest sentence was said... the other one learned its lesson :lol:
"A pediatrician?" "Baby doctor." "That's what you want to be?" "Yeah, that's the job I want. It's not the job best suited for me. The job best suited for me is...flipping burgers."- Morgan and Brittany
"Okay, I've got a muffin."- Shane
"They have no idea I'm talking about them." "[in conversation with Shelly] No, he didn't?!" "Yes, he did!"- the teacher and Shelby
"Why do I have an eraser on my desk?" "Don't touch my eraser!"-Coty and Shane
"I'm setting next to an idiot that's smarter than me."- Brittany
"Yes, you should get dressed. We don't want to see nobody undressed!"-Brittany (triple negative???)
"She can hear you." "She don't know my voice." "Shut up, Brittany!"- Hannah, Brittany and Sarah
"Brittany, you're stupid." "Well, you're smart! What's the differance?"-Sandra and Brittany
"Do you know what's really annoying?" "When you talk."- Charlee and Brittany

"So, it's like a magic vending machine?"- Evan
"I did my homework. Look at it! It's orange!"- Matt
"That's all I hear...all these people complaining, violins. Violins playing a sad, little song."- Matt
"Yahtzee! Oh, my bad, wrong game."- Matt about BINGO
"Yeah! Yahtzee! Get out of jail free card! No, bingo!"- Evan
"What'd you drive?" "A truck 'The Beast'." "By yourself?" mom was with me."- Matt and Blake
"You've got more excuses than Carter has peanuts!"- John
"Quit!" "[mocking]'Qui-it!' I will eat your soul." "And I will eat your heart."-the teacher, Blake and Matt
"Red-necks!" "[in an exaggerated southern accent] He's gonna tuck his pants' legs into his boots, he's gonna get his John Deere hat, and he's gonna leave." "The neck is red."-Matt and Blake
"Did you get the grill?" "Yeah, I'm gonna grill some Pringles." "You should make shish-ka-bobs."-Evan and McKinley
"Did somebody touch my butt?" "No." "Do you wanna touch it?"- Matt and Walker

"So they stripped down naked, rubbed themselves down with olive oil, wrestled and worshipped the god of poetry?"- Josh about ancient Greeks
"Name somebody with money who is not invoved in politics." "Jeb Bush?" "Jeb Bush is the governor of Florida...He's involved in politics..."-the teacher and Josh

[Alan sets off a timer] "Do I have cookies in the oven?..." "I wish!"- the teacher and Jeremiah
" I look like Cousin Itt." "No, you look more like Marilyn." "Monroe?" "Manson."-the teacher and Adam
Okay, another new game from the crazy Washingtonian people! This one's called Poison Dart and the rules are that if you and another person stare at each other then the first on to blow air through their hand when it is cupped around their mouth "kills" the other person and the only way to come back to life is to have another person touch your ear. Weird, huh?
Yeah, I'm not even going to go into what the latest "game" around here is. Let's just say it in voves people saying a *ahem* certain body part loudly during class. You win by how loud you say it and the risk factor of when you say it. It's really disturbing...
The latest round from my school:

"I don't like the force, it's like cheating!" - Melissa (on Star Wars)
"I didn't spell the word wrong, I just had a vowel movement!" - Stephanie
"You need a trick to live..." - Claire (playing euchre)
"Gummy bears are like a multiracial family!" - Jenny
Okay, I finally remembered my new ones...

In Geometry
"You go back and make sure they don't color outside the lines." "Yeah." "Is it wrong that we give an administrator that much crap?"- John, our Geometry sub/ kindergarten- 3rd grade principal and Blake

In World History
"If you had all blue hair I would so date you." - Lil' Josh

"Well, you can just hold your little horses!" "I like to hug my little horses, but that's just me." - Kayla and the teacher

In Oral Comm...on speech day
"And in summary, you just do what I said the first time. Any questions?" "Does your chain hang low?" - Cody giving a speech on how to change a bike chain and Nose

And last week in Oral Comm. when we didn't have a teacher...
"A as in 'apple'!" "Sh as in 'shot'!" - Audrey and Phillip playing hangman

"Teachers, I need you to add Jeremiah to the honor roll list..." "Yay! I'm pretty!" - The principal and Jeremiah
In English
(talking about the bible/genesis):
"Yes. Dinosaurs did exist. They got transformed into lizards when Moses took them onto the arc."-- English Substitute

In Geometry
(whole class was talking and then all of a sudden everyone got quiet..and:)
"Mrs. Pronema, what do racoons eat in their natural habitat."--Danny

Study Hall
(The room is silent and then all of a sudden:)
"Shut up! All of you! Stop talking or you all get blue slips!" "no one is talking." "You two. move. split up." "we aren't talking." "nevermind." --Proctor/John/Proctor/John/Proctor.
I've had some multicultural issues from high schoolers in my day...

Me: I lived in Austria.
Dork: dead seriousWait, you can speak European?
Me: :headdesk:

Me: I lived in Austria.
Other Dork: Do you have kangaroos in your backyard?
Me: What?
Other Dork: Do you...
Me: Are you serious?
Other Dork: What?
Me: You're an idiot.
Other Dork: blonde voice What-EVER.
Me: :headdesk:

Idiot: Do they eat off plates in Austria?
Me: No. We eat off bark and live in treehouses and swing neighbor to neighbor on vines. Because of the dangerous man-eating anteaters.
Idiot: Anteaters?
Me: Yeah.
Idiot. COOL!
Me: :headdesk: