From the Mouth of High School

This was a slow, stressful week!

Monday, December 10, 2007

Algebra

-Mrs Perry: I gave you d-hall, Blake.
-Blake E: Why?
-Mrs Perry: Because you didn't let Ashley hit you the other day.
-Blake E: ...What?
-Mrs Perry: I didn't give you d-hall, Blake.
-Blake E: Oh...

-Blake E: Okay, I'm really hoping that the Governor of Arkansas doesn't come in and beat me...but I couldn't give two flying flips about the Target Test.

Biology

-Buster H: I liked the part of the movie where London was distroyed...but I didn't see the Eiffel Tower.
-Me:...That's in Paris...
-Jeremiah S: That explains it!

English

[Mrs Miers hands Jeremiah S a paper stocking]
-Jeremiah S: Neat! A severed leg!
[Mrs Miers hands Maggie P a paper angel]
-Maggie P: I got an angel, 'cause I'm an angel.
[Mrs Miers hands Taylor K a paper snowman]
-Taylor K: Is this a fat joke!?!
-Mrs Miers:...No...Its a snowman...

[Maggie P is eating a candy bar and trying to hide it behind her book]
-Mrs Miers: Is that a 3 Musketeers?
-Maggie P: [Shoves part of the bar in her mouth] ...No...
-Mrs Miers: Then what is it?
-Maggie P: ...A 3 Musketeers...
[Mrs Miers eats part of Maggie P's 3 Musketeers]
-Taylor K: At least you don't eat it like Maggie does. She picks off all the chocolate, eats it, then eats just the fluff.
-Jeremiah S: the way I eat it, I hardly see the bar...that's right, I made my own fat joke.

[Mrs Miers has 'elfed' several of us, but when she 'elfs' Walker S (her favorite), he's the only 'elf' and we insist on watching it twice]
-Mrs Miers: Walker, you're going to need therapy after this.
-Victoria W: No amount of therepy can save him now.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Band

[Terence H, Amy M, Christy E and myself are waliking to the band room when we meet Jeremiah S going the opposite direction looking confused]
-Terence H: Jeremiah...where are you going? Band is the other way.
-Jeremiah S: I know, but when I was in the instrument rooom someone covered my eyes and spun me around. I figured they wanted me to go that direction, so I did...and didn't stop.


Spanish

[Jeremiah S, Walker S, Meach and myself were discussing WW2 and the scientists who escaped. Dustin E was trying to be smart...it failed]
-Dustin E: You know, I heared Einstein couldn't tie his own shoes.
-Me: Uh...
-Dustin E: But, did they even have shoes to tie back then.
-Me: Einstein lived, like, in the '30s and '40s, they had shoes then.
-Dustin E: Really?! I thought he lived in, like, the 1700's or something.
-Walker S: Yes. He developed the atomic bomb in 1765.
-Me: We used it against the Japanese in the Revolutionary War.
 
If you thought teachers don't slash, well...
Zoya: Mr. Freeborn, is Horatio nobility or commoner?
Mr. F: He was more of a commoner.
Zoya: Then how'd they meet? And become such good friends?
Mr. F: Well, they went to school together, and one day their eyes met across a crowded room, it was the perfect moment, time slowed down, it was fate, like a bad movie. Hamlet needed a friend, and Horatio thought Hamlet was hot. Though the movie doesn't support that theory.
Me: Why?
Mr. F: Because Hamlet looks like a retard.
Zoya: And Horatio has a creeper mustache.
Mr. F: Which is why Hamlet didn't love him back.
Me: What was with those mustaches!
Mr. F: Give them credit, they're vikings.

Me: Aya, I don't want to write the field test.
Aya: okay.
Me: Let's skip English.
aya: and do what?
Me:um...work on our hamlet project?
Alicia: we're going to skip english to do english homework?

Physics:
Mr. M: Alright, Ms. G's not here, but I can help you if you need me to, I do teach physics.
Paul: Wait, you teach physics?
Mr. M: That's what I said.
Paul: Here?
Mr. M: Yeah, two doors down and across the hall.

Musical Theatre
Me: She wouldn't even listen to Nichol
Em: She ignored Nichol?
Me: Yeah.
EM: And lived to tell about it?

Mr. E: You're auditioning for Golde?
Me: Yep, I'm told I'm very mature.
Mr. E: ...okay.

Lunch:
Aya: Oh! By the way Maru, my mom has decided that you are not actually in high school, but a much older person, pretending to be in high school for some unknown reason.
Me: Why?
Aya: You were a really good Ma Bailey, and mom thinks that no teenager should be able to play an old person so well.

Tohru: My dad is coming to the school tomorrow so I can convince him that you're all normal.
Aya: We're normal?
Me: so it would be a bad thing if I dressed like a guy?

Meghan: I just realized I hang out with weird people.
Me: You're sitting with me and Scott, and you just realized we're weird?
Scott: Um, hello, I dressed like a girl for halloween and played a stoner in a effed up version of Charlie Brown.
Me: and it took you this long?
 
We were watching Pearl Harbor with our English teacher.

Teacher was switching through "Scene selections", there's a picture with the Japanese flag.

Nathalie: Yes that's the one! It was the scene with the Japanese.
Teacher: Well the Japanese *kinda* appear more than once in this movie..

-

Teacher: This part is really hot.
(the making out starts)
Me: You mean this part?
Teacher (very happy): YEP!

-

The makeout scene between Danny & Evelyn in the parachute hangar..

Teacher: Nice getting all the germs on the parashutes..
Me: Real shame.
Teacher: Shame when you need one!
 
So because it's the last week of school before Christmas there are some Christmas-themed activities going on each day. Today they were showing Christmas episodes of Seinfield in the caf at lunch. Normally they show Friends, but they didn't for some reason this year. We all like Friends, and don't like Seinfield.
Chelsea: I don't like that guy's shirt.
Me: Or his glasses.
Chelsea: Or his voice.
Me: Or him.
Flavia: I just don't like the show.

We had to pick up a piece of paper with a PIN number on it to apply to unversity. The paper was attached to itself and the back was blacked out, which was stupid because they didn't need to keep it that confidential. Anyway...
Renee: To open, remove stub. Which part is the stub?
Me: I don't know.
Renee: I'll just ask my mom.
Me: Yeah, that's what I was gonna do too. (beat) Don't you think that's a little sad? Potential unversity students and we can't figure out what a stub is?
For the record, we did eventually figure it out.

A couple from Law:
Ms. S had us working in groups and putting our answers on the board. Then she was going through them and we each had to say which one we put up and explain it.
Ms. S: Okay, what about this one? (silence) Who put it up? (more silence) Why are we afraid to admit to our answers?

In the middle of a lecture there's a knock at the door. It was a really loud banging sound that made me nearly jump out of my skin. Ms. S goes to open it and finds that it's only Jensen, a guy in my class.
Ms. S: Your knock makes you sound like an axe murderer.

Reading off a list of people who have library fines:
Ms. S: Foreed, you have a fine, Michelle, you have a lot of fines...

Also part of the Christmas thing is morning trivia. One day the question was: How many reindeer does Santa have?
Maleeha: Seven.
Phil K: Seven? You actually think seven reindeer could drag that fat guy around?

In Families we're watching a movie:
Brittany W: What's the movie about?
Ms. B: Families.

Today was pajama day. I'm in class with my pregnant-and-getting-larger-by-the-day Families teacher. The class president, Ashley, is in the class and she's really big on spirit days like this. She makes it clear she isn't happy with the people who don't participate. Ash comes in decked out in her red and white pajamas:
Ms. B: (before Ashley can say anything) I swear I was gonna wear my pajamas, but they don't fit anymore.

We had a sub in Families one day. Sara gets up to go to the bathroom, which is right down the hall and around the corner. She's gone for a long time. When she finally comes back:
Sara: Sorry, I got lost on the way to the bathroom.
Mr. G: Yeah, it's easy to do that. They should just have the school be one big room, it'd be so much easier.
Sara: Totally.

We also had a sub in World History. Brett is trying to get a sheet out of Ms. P's file cabinet, but because she wasn't there he didn't have the key. He and the sub are yanking at it, with no such luck.
Mr. H: Well, keep working at it, you'll find a way to open it.
Brett: Yeah, right...you got a hammer?

Also from pajama day:
Flavia: Before we go I have to change out of these.
Me: Yeah, I gotta go to the bathroom too.
Hedyeh: Okay, let's go to the bathroom. (starts to walk to the left)
Me and Flavia: Hed, wrong way.

Back in Law:
Simon: I'm gonna sit next to you because I'm annoying like that.
Me: You're not that annoying.
Simon: I'm not?
Me: No.
Simon reaches out and pokes me in the side. I let out a yelp.
Simon: Was that annoying?

We got our marks back on a group project, for which there is only one rubric. I was anxious about getting the mark, and Simon knew that, but he got the rubric first, before I noticed it.
Simon: Not bad.
Me: What?
Simon: Our mark on the concept map. It's okay. Always room for improvement, right?
Me: Gimmie!
Simon holds it out and then yanks it away.
Me: Simon, gimmie!
He gives me the sheet and I look at it. Our marks are 15/15 5/5 5/5 and 5/5. 100%.
I look up and Simon's smirking at me.
Me: That was so not funny.

Not many people go to school on the last day before the break. I'm assuming that's similar where you guys are. The teachers all know it and don't really care:
Ms. S: I've booked the lab for Friday and you'll have time to work on your research, we're not going to be doing anything new in case some of you decide to 'work from home' that day.

Also in Law:
Ms. S: I may be stating the obvious here, but your essays have to incorporate the law.
Simon: (gasp) What?!
 
Before class I was playing a game on my computer called Alien Hunter

Me: Come on die, worthless aliens die, die for me, die for papa.
Kristen: I love how you're talking to your game
Me: You couldn't begin to imagine how I talk to my computer when I'm online
Kristen: I can imagine, I just can't say it/
Me: You know me too damned well


Geometry

Me: Am I the only who's really hot right now?
Everyone else: No we're good

Few Minutes Later

Me: Is it me or is it freezing in here.
Kristen: Weren't you hot a few minutes ago?
Me: Yeah
Kristen: It's almost like you're going through menopause
Me: *Shocked*
Scott: Wanna tell us something Austin?
 
Yesterday was a classic moment in University after spending hours trying to work out how to do something it worked and my words.

"It works... don't ask me how I did it and its a tad back to front... But it works!"
 
LibertyBell said:
Prime Minister (Conservative party leader): Let's not debate whether or not the elected Senators would be competent enough for the positions. You have to be smart to reach high levels of government.
Bloc leader (not me): Um, Mr. Prime Minister, are you familiar with President Bush?
Click to expand...

Hahaha that's great! Whoever said that, I like him/ her! *g*

(whoever posted that): You watch Pearl Harbor in class? Lucky you! I love that film! And yeah the parachute scene IS hot! :D
 
At this store today I thought I saw a friend put something in his pocket and I thought he was shoplifting (he wasn't). This takes place outside with someone who didn't see the original conversation.

Me: Scott I still think my assumption what I saw you do in the store is correct.
Scott: You were wrong want me to take it out of my pants pocket and show you
Me: Yeah
(He takes out his wallet)
Meanwhile a female friend of ours hears this and thinks it sexual you need to have seen the look on her face, she was horrified.

We were talking about a female student who'd be the only female student next year.

Jolene: That's gonna be awkward for her being the only female.
Mr C: I was once the only male student in a class it was very uncomfortable.
Me and Scott shoot each other looks and burst out laughing.
Mr C: What'd I do or say now?
Scott: Ya know most guys love to be the only male in a class filled with females.
Mr C: I didn't think that through
 
I have a crazy LA class and there is one girl named Britney and another guy named Paul who are always really mean to our teacher, but I have to admit that it is pretty hilarious some days.

Yesterday Ms. G's third hour class was talking about Shakespseare being gay and she got really mad so a few people from that class told people in my class (7th hr) so that we could just mess with her. (I know it's mean, but sometimes it's funny.)
Ms. G- What did you guys learn about Shakespeare last year?
Britney/Paul- He was gay.
Ms. G-That has nothing to do with the poem, guys.
Britney- But he was.
Ms. G- No, it really doesn't have anything to do with anything right now.
Britney-(By this time she's bummed bc Ms. G hasn't really reacted much so she just yells...) I think gay marriage should be legal!

Needless to say, after that Ms. G was pretty ticked off. But it had the entire class in tears.

Then, today, we were talking about poems again and my friend Amelia was trying to explain that one character in the poem had a lot of faith in another characer, she just didn't know how to word it.

Amelia- The writer of the poem is inside the guy he's writing to. Well, not literally inside of him. He's just inside him, you know. (By now the entire class is laughing) I mean, he's in his blood. Does that make any sense?
 
3 of my classmates are discussing something out loud and Freja gets annoyed by it.

Freja: HEADACHE! (she shouts right in my ear)
Me: Me too now!
 
We had the best moment in Study Period today,
Me and My friend had nothing to do so Mr S gave us a book to read. We go to a Catholic all girls school by the way..


Mr S: Louise, don't you have any work to do
Me: No its 2nd period
Mr S: Why don't I give you a book. It is by a hip happening author going by the name of Shakespeare about a Black Man falling in love with a white woman
Marie: Why would we want to read that?
Mr S: Because it is better then sitting here doing nothing
Me: I am all for that

*give us a book*
*5 min later*

Me: This is so boring
Mr S: Shh be quite Louise or I will have to move you
Marie: But this is a boring book
Mr S: Look I will show you the dirty bits.
Me and Marie: WHat?
Mr S: Feel special. Most schools rip these pages out you know.

*5 min later*

Me: Its like Sex Ed all over again
 
^lol

Our first lesson with a my Social Studies teacher for a the year. We were discussing the treaty of Waitangi and we were supposed to be the Maoris. The cake was supposed to sybolise the land (New Zealand) lol.

Mr Harmon: You have a spirtual bond to the cake. You are a part of the cake and the cake is a part of you"
Allie: Can't we just eat it?
Rachel H: It's like 'Biggest Loser'
Israel: The ultimate temptation :lol:!

Mr Harmon: Okay, we need half of you to die.
Me: Why would we want that?
Mr Harmon: Because it's good if you come to my side... And I'll give you more M&Ms :D
*More than half the class moves*

hehe
 
Hannah said:
^lol

Our first lesson with a my Social Studies teacher for a the year. We were discussing the treaty of Waitangi and we were supposed to be the Maoris. The cake was supposed to sybolise the land (New Zealand) lol.

Mr Harmon: You have a spirtual bond to the cake. You are a part of the cake and the cake is a part of you"
Allie: Can't we just eat it?
Rachel H: It's like 'Biggest Loser'
Israel: The ultimate temptation :lol:!

Mr Harmon: Okay, we need half of you to die.
Me: Why would we want that?
Mr Harmon: Because it's good if you come to my side... And I'll give you more M&Ms :D
*More than half the class moves*

hehe
Click to expand...

omg that's hilarious. i'll have to have a think. <3
 
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