Puzzle Pieces
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MrsWillows
Rookie
Great update! I cant wait for another chapter!!
ladyhunter
Head of the Swing Shift
Sorry it took so long to update this... I wrote this chapter over three times before I got it the way I wanted it.
AND, many, many thanks to Waiting for looking this over for me.
~~~~
He walked quietly into the house. He slid off his shoes and left them at the foot of the stairway. Silently he climbed the stairs to the end of the hall where Catherine lay sleeping.
Tony scanned the room and noticed a few things that brought a smile to his face. The sight of Catherine alone made his heart melt. Her body was curled up on its side with her legs outstretched in front of her. A copy of Forensics Quarterly sat untouched in front of her sleeping body while another magazine was opened, revealing an ad for a breast pump. The page was turned down at the corner. Smiling while he picked up both magazines, Tony gently tossed them on the bedside table. Although she was going to become a mother again, he noted that she was still a forensic criminalist and she would not give up that part of herself. He glanced at the alarm clock, it read precisely 11:45 pm. He sighed while slipping off the rest of his clothes except for his t-shirt and boxers, and slid into bed next to Catherine.
“You’re here,” Catherine whispered her squeaky, sleepy voice.
“Yeah, I finally made it,” he replied tiredly. “I’m home.”
“What took you so long, I thought were going to be here an hour ago?” She asked craning her head around to see him.
“Well,” he started softly. “It’s sort of a long story,” he said before he leaned towards her to kiss her cheek.
“My flight was overbooked, and they asked if someone would be able to take a later flight. So, I offered.”
“Why did you do that?” She asked as she turned her body towards him.
“Because,” he stopped without explanation.
“I gave up my seat for two soldiers from Fort Lewis. They were accompanying their dead comrade’s body back to Vegas for his funeral,” he replied flatly.
“I’m sorry,” she began after a few minutes. “That was a very nice…. no, respectable thing you did.
“I guess I should have called, but I didn’t want to wake you.” His hands crawled around to her front and found their way to her small bump. He spied a big smile on her face as she placed one of her hands on his.
“How are you feeling?” He asked as he leaned his head into the back of hers.
“I’m okay, just really tired lately, but I’m glad the morning sickness is over. I still crave things like… onion rings with chocolate milk, and my newest obsession is cashews and strawberries.”
“I’m glad you are feeling better. Lindsey said you weren’t doing so well for a while.”
“Wait…what?” Catherine asked catching his statement off guard. “You talked to Lindsey?”
“Yeah, I talked to her not too long ago…. sometime last week I think.” He answered the question before she could ask. “I called looking for you and she answered. We talked for a while, mainly about you. She did tell me that she got an A on her Biology test.”
“Somehow I feel left out,” she playfully stated.
A yawn crept from her mouth as she snuggled closer to him.
“We should get some sleep; we’ve got a lot to talk about,” his voice whispered in her ear.
He wrapped his arms around her leaving one hand on her stomach as her eyes fell closed. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” she whispered back as she closed her eyes in contentment. “I’m glad you are here.”
The night seemed to go by slow as she tossed and turned unable to get completely comfortable. Sleep came in spurts, only a couple hours at a time. When she did wake up, she was either too hot, uncomfortable or at one point she thought she was hungry. Then again, she lost count of the times she got up to use the bathroom. Being pregnant was really getting the better of her, especially this time of year.
Tony lay sleeping next to her when she decided it was time to start the day. The clock next to her read 7:45 am. The sound of his light snoring brought a smile to her face. She really did miss having him in her bed.
As she made her way to the bottom of the stairs, she spotted his wallet and keys on the table next to the door. Another sign of her pregnancy was the urge to tuck things away in their space. A soft smirk formed on her face as she thought about how his things didn’t look out of place where they were. She had never really been like this before, but this time it was different. She fought the temptation to take all of Tony’s clothes out of his travel bag and place them in a drawer she cleared out just for his things. She looked at the urge as a combination of being pregnant and her desire to combine both of their separate lives together.
She finished making the coffee and planned breakfast. Her growling stomach interrupted her thoughts. Over the past months, she had learned to feed her upset stomach rather than ignoring it.
“Something smells good,” she heard his voice from the stairs, “what are you making?”
Tony asked as he met her in the kitchen.
They stood for a moment or two just looking at each other. His eyes were almost a blue color Catherine noticed. Then he flashed his smile at her, his wonderful, brilliant smile. The one that always has the ability to make her heart melt. His hand traveled up to her cheek. He traced the visible dark circles under eyes with his thumb as she continued to take him in.
The ding of the coffee maker forced Catherine to look away from him.
“Before you even say it, my doctor said its okay for me to have coffee,” she smirked as she poured a cup her him then one for herself leaving them both on the counter.
“Hey, I’m not complaining, as long as you don’t try to feed me leaves and twigs, I’m fine,” Tony commented back with a smile still on his face. “Lindsey also said you have been on an ‘organic kick’ or that was how she referred to it.”
“Now I really feel left out,” she quipped playfully.
“Have I told you how much I have missed you?” He quietly said still standing in front of her with his hand still remaining on her cheek.
Catherine tilted her head towards his hand and lowered her eyes. A small blush came to her face. “I missed you too,” her breathless words escaped her mouth.
“God, you are beautiful pregnant,” Tony whispered tilting her head to face him.
His eyes were even more blue than grey as he leaned down to meet Catherine’s lips. His mouth met hers with passion, and she eagerly returned the kiss as her hand wrapped around the back of his neck.
He placed his hands on her middle as they continued to kiss. His body leaned into hers more as he pressed his hips into hers. Despite being pregnant, Catherine pressed her hips to meet his. His kiss became more passionate as one of his hands made its way to one her breasts. His hand stroked the soft cotton fabric of her nightgown.
Their lips parted and a small moan came from Catherine.
“Catherine, I really need you… I need to feel you and to love you,” He panted leaning his head in towards hers. “Please… I need,” he croaked out eagerly.
“I can’t,” Catherine whispered. Her hands reached up to his chest and pushed him gently away from her.
He took a step back. His eyes filled with hurt and disappointment. She watched as his chest heaved up and down. “It’s okay,” he said with coldness stirring in his voice. Catherine watched him wipe his mouth with the back of his hand. A gesture that reminded her of wiping away something that was unpleasant.
She could tell that he really wasn’t okay with her sudden decision to stop. His demeanor was usually very calm, collected and straight forward. Now he was agitated and frustrated with his eyes giving him away. His chest was still heaving even several minutes later. She could feel his resentment as he stood a mere foot away from her, but to Catherine, he felt miles away.
Her first instinct was to take a step towards him. She wanted to right the wrong that just happened between them. But his body language was keeping her from going near him. His arms were folded across his broad chest. He stood to the side not quite facing her. Something about seeing him so frustrated and upset almost frightened her. But in a sense it also comforted her. He wasn’t afraid to show his true feelings around her. But what she really wanted to know was… WHY?
He turned to her, “And now you say you can’t? Can’t what Catherine? Can’t be near me? Can’t love me?”
“So, this is about …what…sex?” She fired back at him. She kept her mouth partly open, her eyes became round and her heart began to beat louder in her chest. She stood now almost angry as an innocent conversation was bound to become an argument.
“Let’s just say, you are not the only one frustrated by this or our situation,” he said in a softer, less callous tone.
“I don’t get it,” he began turning to face her. “You beg me, no practically plead with me to come here to be with you and …” he stopped as one of his arms came off his chest and stretched out towards her. He turned his back and took steps away from her, increasing the cold distance between them.
“And WHAT?” She answered too astonished to even think about what he was saying to her. The hungry feeling she had when she woke up disappeared. Instead, her stomach was twisted in knots. Uneasiness filled her as she placed her hand on her stomach somehow shielding the two small beings from what was happening around them.
“What is it you want, Catherine? I mean, what do you want from me? Do you really want us to be together?” He questioned with hurt still lingering in his voice. “Sometimes I get the feeling that you like it this way, me being 1,800 or so miles away from you.”
“Why would you even ask that?” Catherine eked out while tears filled her eyes. “Tony, I’m scared, I’m alone and I’m pregnant, what do you think I’m going to say?”
Irritation filled him again as he almost yelled, “I know, you remind me of that every time we talk!” Wincing, he realized how harsh it must have sounded to Catherine. He balled up his hand and released it again trying to find the right words.
Forgetting that she was pregnant once more, Catherine pulled her thoughts together and was ready to defend herself and her decisions. She took in a deep breath and let it out. “What about you? You are, like you said, 1,800 miles away from me. You don’t have to endure the looks; you have to explain the quote, unplanned pregnancy, unquote. You live in another city for God’s Sake. To me, it seems like YOU are the one that doesn’t want to be with me.”
“So, what do you want me to do about it?” He almost immediately returned ready to defend himself to her.
The scene was beginning to become reminiscent of the arguments she had with Grissom. But this time she was arguing with the man she loved, the man she wanted to be with and the father of the children she was carrying. She wanted to show Tony, most of all, that she wasn’t going to back down.
“Tony, I’m tired,” she sighed as she shook her head in agitation. “I’m tired from being pregnant. I’m tired from defending myself. I’m tired of trying to explain why I live here and you don’t. I’m tired of trying to find a reason why we aren’t together. Most of all, I’m almost too tired to fight for us anymore.” She stood in her same spot. Glued to the place where she wasn’t going to abandon herself.
“Is that what you want?” Anger filled his question. “Because if it is, then I’ll walk out of here and you never have to see me again. Is that what you want?” He asked again this time his inflection was laced with hurt and confusion.
“No, that’s NOT what I want,” she flew back at him. “It’s just…” she started as she took her eyes off of him. “I want… I want… I WANT YOU!” She found herself yelling as if under attack.
“I want you. I want you and me, living together. I want us to raise our children together. I want to wake up with you every morning; I want to hear you snore at night. I love the idea that you bought a house because it doesn’t matter to me where we live, as long as it’s with you and me and our family. You are the most laid back, low-key, attractive, and inferiorating man I have ever known. No one has ever touched me the way you do. Or even loved me the way you do. Sometimes I have to remind myself that you are not going to be sleeping next to me when I wake up. All I want is be surrounded by…YOU! ” She had to stop. She took a few short, stuttered breaths then continued this time less animated. “I’m tired of people wanting things from me, answers that I can’t give them. It’s bad enough I feel like I have to explain everything to Grissom, I really don’t want to have to feel that way with you…. It’s just when you and I were in the kitchen…” More sobs came from her as she hung her head in her hands.
Her tear filled eyes couldn’t stay open anymore as she closed them and covered her face. Tears flowed into her hands. Her body shook as sobs poured out from her setting free a much needed release.
AND, many, many thanks to Waiting for looking this over for me.
~~~~
He walked quietly into the house. He slid off his shoes and left them at the foot of the stairway. Silently he climbed the stairs to the end of the hall where Catherine lay sleeping.
Tony scanned the room and noticed a few things that brought a smile to his face. The sight of Catherine alone made his heart melt. Her body was curled up on its side with her legs outstretched in front of her. A copy of Forensics Quarterly sat untouched in front of her sleeping body while another magazine was opened, revealing an ad for a breast pump. The page was turned down at the corner. Smiling while he picked up both magazines, Tony gently tossed them on the bedside table. Although she was going to become a mother again, he noted that she was still a forensic criminalist and she would not give up that part of herself. He glanced at the alarm clock, it read precisely 11:45 pm. He sighed while slipping off the rest of his clothes except for his t-shirt and boxers, and slid into bed next to Catherine.
“You’re here,” Catherine whispered her squeaky, sleepy voice.
“Yeah, I finally made it,” he replied tiredly. “I’m home.”
“What took you so long, I thought were going to be here an hour ago?” She asked craning her head around to see him.
“Well,” he started softly. “It’s sort of a long story,” he said before he leaned towards her to kiss her cheek.
“My flight was overbooked, and they asked if someone would be able to take a later flight. So, I offered.”
“Why did you do that?” She asked as she turned her body towards him.
“Because,” he stopped without explanation.
“I gave up my seat for two soldiers from Fort Lewis. They were accompanying their dead comrade’s body back to Vegas for his funeral,” he replied flatly.
“I’m sorry,” she began after a few minutes. “That was a very nice…. no, respectable thing you did.
“I guess I should have called, but I didn’t want to wake you.” His hands crawled around to her front and found their way to her small bump. He spied a big smile on her face as she placed one of her hands on his.
“How are you feeling?” He asked as he leaned his head into the back of hers.
“I’m okay, just really tired lately, but I’m glad the morning sickness is over. I still crave things like… onion rings with chocolate milk, and my newest obsession is cashews and strawberries.”
“I’m glad you are feeling better. Lindsey said you weren’t doing so well for a while.”
“Wait…what?” Catherine asked catching his statement off guard. “You talked to Lindsey?”
“Yeah, I talked to her not too long ago…. sometime last week I think.” He answered the question before she could ask. “I called looking for you and she answered. We talked for a while, mainly about you. She did tell me that she got an A on her Biology test.”
“Somehow I feel left out,” she playfully stated.
A yawn crept from her mouth as she snuggled closer to him.
“We should get some sleep; we’ve got a lot to talk about,” his voice whispered in her ear.
He wrapped his arms around her leaving one hand on her stomach as her eyes fell closed. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” she whispered back as she closed her eyes in contentment. “I’m glad you are here.”
The night seemed to go by slow as she tossed and turned unable to get completely comfortable. Sleep came in spurts, only a couple hours at a time. When she did wake up, she was either too hot, uncomfortable or at one point she thought she was hungry. Then again, she lost count of the times she got up to use the bathroom. Being pregnant was really getting the better of her, especially this time of year.
Tony lay sleeping next to her when she decided it was time to start the day. The clock next to her read 7:45 am. The sound of his light snoring brought a smile to her face. She really did miss having him in her bed.
As she made her way to the bottom of the stairs, she spotted his wallet and keys on the table next to the door. Another sign of her pregnancy was the urge to tuck things away in their space. A soft smirk formed on her face as she thought about how his things didn’t look out of place where they were. She had never really been like this before, but this time it was different. She fought the temptation to take all of Tony’s clothes out of his travel bag and place them in a drawer she cleared out just for his things. She looked at the urge as a combination of being pregnant and her desire to combine both of their separate lives together.
She finished making the coffee and planned breakfast. Her growling stomach interrupted her thoughts. Over the past months, she had learned to feed her upset stomach rather than ignoring it.
“Something smells good,” she heard his voice from the stairs, “what are you making?”
Tony asked as he met her in the kitchen.
They stood for a moment or two just looking at each other. His eyes were almost a blue color Catherine noticed. Then he flashed his smile at her, his wonderful, brilliant smile. The one that always has the ability to make her heart melt. His hand traveled up to her cheek. He traced the visible dark circles under eyes with his thumb as she continued to take him in.
The ding of the coffee maker forced Catherine to look away from him.
“Before you even say it, my doctor said its okay for me to have coffee,” she smirked as she poured a cup her him then one for herself leaving them both on the counter.
“Hey, I’m not complaining, as long as you don’t try to feed me leaves and twigs, I’m fine,” Tony commented back with a smile still on his face. “Lindsey also said you have been on an ‘organic kick’ or that was how she referred to it.”
“Now I really feel left out,” she quipped playfully.
“Have I told you how much I have missed you?” He quietly said still standing in front of her with his hand still remaining on her cheek.
Catherine tilted her head towards his hand and lowered her eyes. A small blush came to her face. “I missed you too,” her breathless words escaped her mouth.
“God, you are beautiful pregnant,” Tony whispered tilting her head to face him.
His eyes were even more blue than grey as he leaned down to meet Catherine’s lips. His mouth met hers with passion, and she eagerly returned the kiss as her hand wrapped around the back of his neck.
He placed his hands on her middle as they continued to kiss. His body leaned into hers more as he pressed his hips into hers. Despite being pregnant, Catherine pressed her hips to meet his. His kiss became more passionate as one of his hands made its way to one her breasts. His hand stroked the soft cotton fabric of her nightgown.
Their lips parted and a small moan came from Catherine.
“Catherine, I really need you… I need to feel you and to love you,” He panted leaning his head in towards hers. “Please… I need,” he croaked out eagerly.
“I can’t,” Catherine whispered. Her hands reached up to his chest and pushed him gently away from her.
He took a step back. His eyes filled with hurt and disappointment. She watched as his chest heaved up and down. “It’s okay,” he said with coldness stirring in his voice. Catherine watched him wipe his mouth with the back of his hand. A gesture that reminded her of wiping away something that was unpleasant.
She could tell that he really wasn’t okay with her sudden decision to stop. His demeanor was usually very calm, collected and straight forward. Now he was agitated and frustrated with his eyes giving him away. His chest was still heaving even several minutes later. She could feel his resentment as he stood a mere foot away from her, but to Catherine, he felt miles away.
Her first instinct was to take a step towards him. She wanted to right the wrong that just happened between them. But his body language was keeping her from going near him. His arms were folded across his broad chest. He stood to the side not quite facing her. Something about seeing him so frustrated and upset almost frightened her. But in a sense it also comforted her. He wasn’t afraid to show his true feelings around her. But what she really wanted to know was… WHY?
He turned to her, “And now you say you can’t? Can’t what Catherine? Can’t be near me? Can’t love me?”
“So, this is about …what…sex?” She fired back at him. She kept her mouth partly open, her eyes became round and her heart began to beat louder in her chest. She stood now almost angry as an innocent conversation was bound to become an argument.
“Let’s just say, you are not the only one frustrated by this or our situation,” he said in a softer, less callous tone.
“I don’t get it,” he began turning to face her. “You beg me, no practically plead with me to come here to be with you and …” he stopped as one of his arms came off his chest and stretched out towards her. He turned his back and took steps away from her, increasing the cold distance between them.
“And WHAT?” She answered too astonished to even think about what he was saying to her. The hungry feeling she had when she woke up disappeared. Instead, her stomach was twisted in knots. Uneasiness filled her as she placed her hand on her stomach somehow shielding the two small beings from what was happening around them.
“What is it you want, Catherine? I mean, what do you want from me? Do you really want us to be together?” He questioned with hurt still lingering in his voice. “Sometimes I get the feeling that you like it this way, me being 1,800 or so miles away from you.”
“Why would you even ask that?” Catherine eked out while tears filled her eyes. “Tony, I’m scared, I’m alone and I’m pregnant, what do you think I’m going to say?”
Irritation filled him again as he almost yelled, “I know, you remind me of that every time we talk!” Wincing, he realized how harsh it must have sounded to Catherine. He balled up his hand and released it again trying to find the right words.
Forgetting that she was pregnant once more, Catherine pulled her thoughts together and was ready to defend herself and her decisions. She took in a deep breath and let it out. “What about you? You are, like you said, 1,800 miles away from me. You don’t have to endure the looks; you have to explain the quote, unplanned pregnancy, unquote. You live in another city for God’s Sake. To me, it seems like YOU are the one that doesn’t want to be with me.”
“So, what do you want me to do about it?” He almost immediately returned ready to defend himself to her.
The scene was beginning to become reminiscent of the arguments she had with Grissom. But this time she was arguing with the man she loved, the man she wanted to be with and the father of the children she was carrying. She wanted to show Tony, most of all, that she wasn’t going to back down.
“Tony, I’m tired,” she sighed as she shook her head in agitation. “I’m tired from being pregnant. I’m tired from defending myself. I’m tired of trying to explain why I live here and you don’t. I’m tired of trying to find a reason why we aren’t together. Most of all, I’m almost too tired to fight for us anymore.” She stood in her same spot. Glued to the place where she wasn’t going to abandon herself.
“Is that what you want?” Anger filled his question. “Because if it is, then I’ll walk out of here and you never have to see me again. Is that what you want?” He asked again this time his inflection was laced with hurt and confusion.
“No, that’s NOT what I want,” she flew back at him. “It’s just…” she started as she took her eyes off of him. “I want… I want… I WANT YOU!” She found herself yelling as if under attack.
“I want you. I want you and me, living together. I want us to raise our children together. I want to wake up with you every morning; I want to hear you snore at night. I love the idea that you bought a house because it doesn’t matter to me where we live, as long as it’s with you and me and our family. You are the most laid back, low-key, attractive, and inferiorating man I have ever known. No one has ever touched me the way you do. Or even loved me the way you do. Sometimes I have to remind myself that you are not going to be sleeping next to me when I wake up. All I want is be surrounded by…YOU! ” She had to stop. She took a few short, stuttered breaths then continued this time less animated. “I’m tired of people wanting things from me, answers that I can’t give them. It’s bad enough I feel like I have to explain everything to Grissom, I really don’t want to have to feel that way with you…. It’s just when you and I were in the kitchen…” More sobs came from her as she hung her head in her hands.
Her tear filled eyes couldn’t stay open anymore as she closed them and covered her face. Tears flowed into her hands. Her body shook as sobs poured out from her setting free a much needed release.
MacsGirlMel
Mac's Personal Assistant
wow I hope things get better soon
ladyhunter
Head of the Swing Shift
Well, since this was a very long chapter, here is the rest of it.
Again, thanks to Waiting for looking this over. You are the best
~~~~
Within a few minutes, she felt his hand on her shoulder. His arm wrapped around her as he led her to the couch and gestured for her to sit. He gently took her hands away from her face as he kneeled in front of her. His hand gently stroked her cheek as his long slender fingers wiped away the remaining tears on her now red, blotchy face.
“I’m sorry I made you feel that way. That’s the last thing I wanted to do.”
She looked up at him. She couldn’t help from noticing his eyes as they became glossy. Perhaps he too was having a weak moment.
“You and I,” she began quietly. “It wasn’t supposed to happen this way.”
“What do you mean?” Concern filled his quiet voice.
“You and I, we were supposed to stay locked away together, sheltered, possibly in bed together, until the outside world needed us. We would get old together, watch Lindsey grow up together as you and I stayed tucked safely away only needing each other. But it didn’t happen that way…” she stopped taking in short breaths again.
“I never in my life thought I would alter my life so drastically for a man, but I did. I did it for you and for me and it scares me, Tony, it scares me a lot. You are away from me and I’m doing this alone. I feel like there is so much pressure on me… that I can’t take it,” she barely got out to him before she covered her face again as more tears flowed from her red eyes.
Shortly after realizing he wasn’t in front of her, she felt his presence again.
He reached his hand out to hers and pulled it away from her face again. He placed something in it. Her eyes opened to see half of a chocolate-zucchini muffin that she had left on the counter.
“I assume this is what you wanted us to have for breakfast?” He asked smiling to her.
“Yeah,” she quietly replied managing a small smile. “I made them myself, just for you. I wanted to show you how good of a cook I have become.”
“Then we should eat them then?” His playful tone kept the smile on her face.
They sat, this time Tony sat on the couch next to her, quietly eating. Not a word was said for several minutes. Catherine cherished the quiet closeness. It gave her an opportunity to pull herself together.
She turned towards him, “I’m …. I’m …So….” She began.
“Shhhh,” he whispered putting his finger to her lips. “You don’t have to be.”
“Catherine, I have to admit, I was freaked out at first when you told me you were pregnant. But, it’s only because there were so many uncertainties. You seemed so sure about everything, I had no idea you were feeling this way.” He stopped and began to stroke her face again. His finger slid across her face from the corner of her lips to the side of her ear. "I hate being away from you just as much. I want to be there for you. All I’ve ever wanted was to be with you. To protect you. To love you. I want you to know, I would never walk away from something I created. I wouldn’t take away that night for anything," he whispered as his hand rested protectively over her belly. “I want to wake up next to you and witness as your stomach grows with a creation that is mine. Damn if I never wanted to pamper someone more than I want to at this very moment."
She took his hand, and without a word stood up and walked to the stairs. Her eyes never left his face as she climbed to the top leading him then to her bedroom. Silently they entered the bedroom then she turned to face him...
"I want to be surrounded by you," she panted leaning into him as her lips met his.
“Hold on,” his head tilted down as their lips parted. “I want to give you something.”
“Can it wait?” Catherine’s husky voice replied while her hands wrapped around his neck.
“Sort of… well, I guess it can wait,” he leaned down to kiss her again.
Her arms remained around his neck as he laid her tenderly down on the bed. Their kiss deepened as he stretched his body as gently as he could over hers. She released her embrace around his neck and laced her hands with his as her body rose to meet his. Even pregnant, Catherine’s body felt so good next to his.
“Marry me Catherine,” Tony whispered into her ear. “I love you and I want to marry you.”
“I love you too, “she practically growled.
“Marry me,” his low soft voice repeated as his hips pressed against hers.
A small moan came from her between short breaths. She felt his lips next to her ear as his hands tightly grasped onto hers. His hips continued to press into hers ever so gently beginning a rhythm between them.
He opened his eyes to look at her. His eyes were a solid color grey. This time there was no hurt or frustration in them, just his passion and his longing to be next to her.
As their rhythm became stronger and more passionate his words kept repeating in her ear. “I love you, marry me… I love you, marry me”. His quiet gravely voice stated almost like a mantra. Catherine felt from his body movements that he wasn’t going to stop until he got an answer.
Catherine was so taken aback. Her body was filled with excitement and anticipation of the moment to give him an immediate answer. Her mind was too caught up in the way his hands felt on her. Too many months had gone by since she felt his touch. It was true; all she wanted was to be surrounded by him and to feel his body on hers. She wanted to be with him, to make love to him and for him to love her in return. The idea that he would propose marriage during this process was surreal.
She didn’t quite know what to say. Catherine secretly had hoped that one day they would get married. After searching for what would be best in the long run for Lindsey and herself; she knew that yes, she would undoubtedly marry Tony and that they would become an extended family. But, becoming pregnant was an unexpected surprise that was emotionally taxing for the both of them. The pressure was overwhelming, and she felt that marriage was the last thing that would be on either of their minds. She worried that maybe they would have married for all of the wrong reasons, and the idea of winding up bitterly married 20 years later was unsettling and disheartening. But, all those thoughts quickly disappeared when she saw him lovingly staring at her awaiting a response. She realized then that it was him who she wanted to love and cherish for years to come. Or it was his strong arms that she wanted to hold her 20 years from now, that prompted her to say.
“Oh…Go…d!” Well that wasn’t what she had planned on saying, but she ended up distracted by him. Or the way he made her body tingle.
One of his hands had escaped hers and his finger smoothly slid from her neck down to her waist. His finger then made its way up her leg stopping on her thigh just short of her cotton underwear. With his face locked on hers, he felt her body quiver.
He stopped his rhythmic pressing against her and asked quietly, “Is that a YES?”
Her heart was beating so fast she couldn’t make sense of what he was asking. She had to slowly take a few moments to regain her thoughts. “You aren’t going to stop torturing me until you get an answer,” her voice broke in.
“Yeah, something like that,” he smiled.
Her hands wrapped around his neck again pulling his head closer to hers. She lifted her chin up and turned to whisper. “What took you so long?” She asked before placing a kiss on the underside of his chin.
She felt a smile form on his face as he leaned in to place a kiss on her neck.
His hand continued its trek up her thigh as he continued to tease her body delightfully. She felt him finger the outside stitching of her underwear as her eyes fluttered shut at the soft contact. Tilting her head back into her pillow, she let out a small moan as she felt his breath lingering on her neck again.
~~~~
After their bodies untangled, Catherine stretched in a cat-like fashion and rolled over to her side. She felt the bed move as Tony flipped over to face her. One of his long fingers slid along her face from the bridge of her nose to the outer edge of her eye. He traced the small lines around her eyes as she studied him.
“I love you,” he whispered as he quietly leaned in to her. “I’m glad I’m here.”
“Me too,” she cooed.
“You still look tired,” he said as his finger traced the dark circles still remaining under her eyes. “Tell you what, I’m going to go for a run and leave you here in bed,” he smiled. “When I get back, I’ll make you something to eat and we’ll see where the day takes us. How does that sound?”
“MMMM, fantastic,” she said relaxing into the bed.
Tony got up, changed his clothes and found the small box he brought from Seattle. He found a notepad on the table beside her bed. Another thing that had not really surprised him was that Catherine wrote her notes on personal stationery. Handwriting might take longer, but he knew she appreciated the intimate level that it provided. Grabbing a piece of the stationery, he wrote a quick note and placed it next to the black box. By the time he got back to the bed, Catherine had fallen asleep. A sight he loved to look at, Catherine sleeping. He placed the small black box on the pillow next to her as he softly pushed back a small amount of hair that had fallen in her face, and then placed a kiss on her forehead before he left the room.
An hour or so had passed while Catherine slept. A feeling she had come to enjoy, sleeping during the day when no one needed anything from her.
She slowly opened her eyes and immediately focused on the black item that happened to be in her line of view. Her eyes scanned the pillow and rested on a piece of paper that was sitting next to the black box. She reached for the note excitedly wanting to know exactly what Tony would say to her…..
Catherine,
Just to let you know, I would have proposed to you no matter where we lived or what might have happened between us.
I love you. I want to be your husband and I want you to be my wife.
Love,
Tony
Without haste or thought she opened the box, and slipped the ring on in one seamless motion. A smile crept across her face as she watched the diamond solitaire ring sparkle in the afternoon light.
Lost in her thoughts, she slowly rolled out of her bed. She patted her small tummy and headed for the shower. A small ache began to emit along the bottom of her bump. She thought nothing of it as she undressed still focused on her new engagement ring. It was always a mystery to her why men fell asleep after sex. Her body was still tingling; her senses were still flaming after their passionate encounter. Another feeling Catherine savored, the long lasting effects of lovemaking. She winced at a small cramp that came from the same place only moments ago. Still not thinking anything of her now uncomfortable aches, she entered the shower blowing them off as problematic gas, hoping they would go away soon.
Standing under the jet of the shower, Catherine let the warm water rinse over her body. The water streamed down her as she felt no need to hurry. She would take all the time she needed. Another luxury she loved about days off, not rushing in the shower and being able to enjoy the feel of the water as it caressed your skin. Every time her ring caught her eye, she could not help but smile. She couldn’t wait to show Tony how it looked on her finger or to begin discussing the future.
Catherine was in the point of her life where she wasn’t on a chase for a man. She had finally met the perfect man, or the perfect man for her. Starting a family at 44 was not in her plans, but as her friend Warrick said, ‘life is so short.’ The puzzle pieces were starting to form a nice picture. Corny as it sounded, she couldn’t wait to see what the final picture would look like.
“Catherine?” Tony called up the stairs after returning from his run. His run was more of a reason to let Catherine rest rather than to have an actual workout. But, he forgot how unforgiving the desert heat can be even in the early afternoon. Sweat beaded on his forehead as he wiped it off climbing the stairs.
He heard the rush of the shower as he drew closer to her bedroom. “Cath, are you here?” Tony’s voice called a little louder as he stepped into the bedroom.
He heard a commotion coming from the shower. With a sigh, he sat down on the bed and began to take off his shoes. More commotion came from the bathroom as he heard a sound almost like Catherine crying.
“Are you okay?” He called again still not hearing a response from Catherine.
Her body could barely make it out of the bathroom towards his voice. The once mild and uncomfortable cramps now were extremely painful. In her flurry of finding a robe or something to put over her wet body, she didn’t see or ignored all together the small stream of blood that was running down the drain.
The force of her legs gave out underneath her, and she fell almost immediately upon seeing him. His arms upon instinct reached out and grabbed Catherine as she faced him.
Her pale face and red eyes were all the indication he needed. The panicked look on her face as both hands grasped around her middle made it even harder to get the words out that she desperately wanted to.
“Tony,” She breathed as she looked at him pleading for help. “Something… something… is not right,” her voice barely eked out before leaning all of her body into him.
Again, thanks to Waiting for looking this over. You are the best
~~~~
Within a few minutes, she felt his hand on her shoulder. His arm wrapped around her as he led her to the couch and gestured for her to sit. He gently took her hands away from her face as he kneeled in front of her. His hand gently stroked her cheek as his long slender fingers wiped away the remaining tears on her now red, blotchy face.
“I’m sorry I made you feel that way. That’s the last thing I wanted to do.”
She looked up at him. She couldn’t help from noticing his eyes as they became glossy. Perhaps he too was having a weak moment.
“You and I,” she began quietly. “It wasn’t supposed to happen this way.”
“What do you mean?” Concern filled his quiet voice.
“You and I, we were supposed to stay locked away together, sheltered, possibly in bed together, until the outside world needed us. We would get old together, watch Lindsey grow up together as you and I stayed tucked safely away only needing each other. But it didn’t happen that way…” she stopped taking in short breaths again.
“I never in my life thought I would alter my life so drastically for a man, but I did. I did it for you and for me and it scares me, Tony, it scares me a lot. You are away from me and I’m doing this alone. I feel like there is so much pressure on me… that I can’t take it,” she barely got out to him before she covered her face again as more tears flowed from her red eyes.
Shortly after realizing he wasn’t in front of her, she felt his presence again.
He reached his hand out to hers and pulled it away from her face again. He placed something in it. Her eyes opened to see half of a chocolate-zucchini muffin that she had left on the counter.
“I assume this is what you wanted us to have for breakfast?” He asked smiling to her.
“Yeah,” she quietly replied managing a small smile. “I made them myself, just for you. I wanted to show you how good of a cook I have become.”
“Then we should eat them then?” His playful tone kept the smile on her face.
They sat, this time Tony sat on the couch next to her, quietly eating. Not a word was said for several minutes. Catherine cherished the quiet closeness. It gave her an opportunity to pull herself together.
She turned towards him, “I’m …. I’m …So….” She began.
“Shhhh,” he whispered putting his finger to her lips. “You don’t have to be.”
“Catherine, I have to admit, I was freaked out at first when you told me you were pregnant. But, it’s only because there were so many uncertainties. You seemed so sure about everything, I had no idea you were feeling this way.” He stopped and began to stroke her face again. His finger slid across her face from the corner of her lips to the side of her ear. "I hate being away from you just as much. I want to be there for you. All I’ve ever wanted was to be with you. To protect you. To love you. I want you to know, I would never walk away from something I created. I wouldn’t take away that night for anything," he whispered as his hand rested protectively over her belly. “I want to wake up next to you and witness as your stomach grows with a creation that is mine. Damn if I never wanted to pamper someone more than I want to at this very moment."
She took his hand, and without a word stood up and walked to the stairs. Her eyes never left his face as she climbed to the top leading him then to her bedroom. Silently they entered the bedroom then she turned to face him...
"I want to be surrounded by you," she panted leaning into him as her lips met his.
“Hold on,” his head tilted down as their lips parted. “I want to give you something.”
“Can it wait?” Catherine’s husky voice replied while her hands wrapped around his neck.
“Sort of… well, I guess it can wait,” he leaned down to kiss her again.
Her arms remained around his neck as he laid her tenderly down on the bed. Their kiss deepened as he stretched his body as gently as he could over hers. She released her embrace around his neck and laced her hands with his as her body rose to meet his. Even pregnant, Catherine’s body felt so good next to his.
“Marry me Catherine,” Tony whispered into her ear. “I love you and I want to marry you.”
“I love you too, “she practically growled.
“Marry me,” his low soft voice repeated as his hips pressed against hers.
A small moan came from her between short breaths. She felt his lips next to her ear as his hands tightly grasped onto hers. His hips continued to press into hers ever so gently beginning a rhythm between them.
He opened his eyes to look at her. His eyes were a solid color grey. This time there was no hurt or frustration in them, just his passion and his longing to be next to her.
As their rhythm became stronger and more passionate his words kept repeating in her ear. “I love you, marry me… I love you, marry me”. His quiet gravely voice stated almost like a mantra. Catherine felt from his body movements that he wasn’t going to stop until he got an answer.
Catherine was so taken aback. Her body was filled with excitement and anticipation of the moment to give him an immediate answer. Her mind was too caught up in the way his hands felt on her. Too many months had gone by since she felt his touch. It was true; all she wanted was to be surrounded by him and to feel his body on hers. She wanted to be with him, to make love to him and for him to love her in return. The idea that he would propose marriage during this process was surreal.
She didn’t quite know what to say. Catherine secretly had hoped that one day they would get married. After searching for what would be best in the long run for Lindsey and herself; she knew that yes, she would undoubtedly marry Tony and that they would become an extended family. But, becoming pregnant was an unexpected surprise that was emotionally taxing for the both of them. The pressure was overwhelming, and she felt that marriage was the last thing that would be on either of their minds. She worried that maybe they would have married for all of the wrong reasons, and the idea of winding up bitterly married 20 years later was unsettling and disheartening. But, all those thoughts quickly disappeared when she saw him lovingly staring at her awaiting a response. She realized then that it was him who she wanted to love and cherish for years to come. Or it was his strong arms that she wanted to hold her 20 years from now, that prompted her to say.
“Oh…Go…d!” Well that wasn’t what she had planned on saying, but she ended up distracted by him. Or the way he made her body tingle.
One of his hands had escaped hers and his finger smoothly slid from her neck down to her waist. His finger then made its way up her leg stopping on her thigh just short of her cotton underwear. With his face locked on hers, he felt her body quiver.
He stopped his rhythmic pressing against her and asked quietly, “Is that a YES?”
Her heart was beating so fast she couldn’t make sense of what he was asking. She had to slowly take a few moments to regain her thoughts. “You aren’t going to stop torturing me until you get an answer,” her voice broke in.
“Yeah, something like that,” he smiled.
Her hands wrapped around his neck again pulling his head closer to hers. She lifted her chin up and turned to whisper. “What took you so long?” She asked before placing a kiss on the underside of his chin.
She felt a smile form on his face as he leaned in to place a kiss on her neck.
His hand continued its trek up her thigh as he continued to tease her body delightfully. She felt him finger the outside stitching of her underwear as her eyes fluttered shut at the soft contact. Tilting her head back into her pillow, she let out a small moan as she felt his breath lingering on her neck again.
~~~~
After their bodies untangled, Catherine stretched in a cat-like fashion and rolled over to her side. She felt the bed move as Tony flipped over to face her. One of his long fingers slid along her face from the bridge of her nose to the outer edge of her eye. He traced the small lines around her eyes as she studied him.
“I love you,” he whispered as he quietly leaned in to her. “I’m glad I’m here.”
“Me too,” she cooed.
“You still look tired,” he said as his finger traced the dark circles still remaining under her eyes. “Tell you what, I’m going to go for a run and leave you here in bed,” he smiled. “When I get back, I’ll make you something to eat and we’ll see where the day takes us. How does that sound?”
“MMMM, fantastic,” she said relaxing into the bed.
Tony got up, changed his clothes and found the small box he brought from Seattle. He found a notepad on the table beside her bed. Another thing that had not really surprised him was that Catherine wrote her notes on personal stationery. Handwriting might take longer, but he knew she appreciated the intimate level that it provided. Grabbing a piece of the stationery, he wrote a quick note and placed it next to the black box. By the time he got back to the bed, Catherine had fallen asleep. A sight he loved to look at, Catherine sleeping. He placed the small black box on the pillow next to her as he softly pushed back a small amount of hair that had fallen in her face, and then placed a kiss on her forehead before he left the room.
An hour or so had passed while Catherine slept. A feeling she had come to enjoy, sleeping during the day when no one needed anything from her.
She slowly opened her eyes and immediately focused on the black item that happened to be in her line of view. Her eyes scanned the pillow and rested on a piece of paper that was sitting next to the black box. She reached for the note excitedly wanting to know exactly what Tony would say to her…..
Catherine,
Just to let you know, I would have proposed to you no matter where we lived or what might have happened between us.
I love you. I want to be your husband and I want you to be my wife.
Love,
Tony
Without haste or thought she opened the box, and slipped the ring on in one seamless motion. A smile crept across her face as she watched the diamond solitaire ring sparkle in the afternoon light.
Lost in her thoughts, she slowly rolled out of her bed. She patted her small tummy and headed for the shower. A small ache began to emit along the bottom of her bump. She thought nothing of it as she undressed still focused on her new engagement ring. It was always a mystery to her why men fell asleep after sex. Her body was still tingling; her senses were still flaming after their passionate encounter. Another feeling Catherine savored, the long lasting effects of lovemaking. She winced at a small cramp that came from the same place only moments ago. Still not thinking anything of her now uncomfortable aches, she entered the shower blowing them off as problematic gas, hoping they would go away soon.
Standing under the jet of the shower, Catherine let the warm water rinse over her body. The water streamed down her as she felt no need to hurry. She would take all the time she needed. Another luxury she loved about days off, not rushing in the shower and being able to enjoy the feel of the water as it caressed your skin. Every time her ring caught her eye, she could not help but smile. She couldn’t wait to show Tony how it looked on her finger or to begin discussing the future.
Catherine was in the point of her life where she wasn’t on a chase for a man. She had finally met the perfect man, or the perfect man for her. Starting a family at 44 was not in her plans, but as her friend Warrick said, ‘life is so short.’ The puzzle pieces were starting to form a nice picture. Corny as it sounded, she couldn’t wait to see what the final picture would look like.
“Catherine?” Tony called up the stairs after returning from his run. His run was more of a reason to let Catherine rest rather than to have an actual workout. But, he forgot how unforgiving the desert heat can be even in the early afternoon. Sweat beaded on his forehead as he wiped it off climbing the stairs.
He heard the rush of the shower as he drew closer to her bedroom. “Cath, are you here?” Tony’s voice called a little louder as he stepped into the bedroom.
He heard a commotion coming from the shower. With a sigh, he sat down on the bed and began to take off his shoes. More commotion came from the bathroom as he heard a sound almost like Catherine crying.
“Are you okay?” He called again still not hearing a response from Catherine.
Her body could barely make it out of the bathroom towards his voice. The once mild and uncomfortable cramps now were extremely painful. In her flurry of finding a robe or something to put over her wet body, she didn’t see or ignored all together the small stream of blood that was running down the drain.
The force of her legs gave out underneath her, and she fell almost immediately upon seeing him. His arms upon instinct reached out and grabbed Catherine as she faced him.
Her pale face and red eyes were all the indication he needed. The panicked look on her face as both hands grasped around her middle made it even harder to get the words out that she desperately wanted to.
“Tony,” She breathed as she looked at him pleading for help. “Something… something… is not right,” her voice barely eked out before leaning all of her body into him.
MacsGirlMel
Mac's Personal Assistant
uhoh I hope she's okay
ladyhunter
Head of the Swing Shift
Re: China's Stand on South-South Cooperation
ghij749 This thread is for replying to the previous posts. I'm sure there is another spot where you can post your thought about today's economy. In case you don't know, this board is for dicussion of CSI.
ghij749 This thread is for replying to the previous posts. I'm sure there is another spot where you can post your thought about today's economy. In case you don't know, this board is for dicussion of CSI.
ladyhunter
Head of the Swing Shift
Re: China's Stand on South-South Cooperation
In case anyone was wondering...
I'm going on vacation next week, but I am working on an update. Two paragraphs are already done.
In case anyone was wondering...
I'm going on vacation next week, but I am working on an update. Two paragraphs are already done.
racefh853629
Pathologist
Re: China's Stand on South-South Cooperation
Ooo... a cliffhanger...
I have to admit, I'm kinda sucked into this now... haha. Can't wait for more.
Ooo... a cliffhanger...
I have to admit, I'm kinda sucked into this now... haha. Can't wait for more.
I'm a Gil/Cath shipper, but Vartann would be my second choice for Cath. So, I'm really enjoying this story.
ladyhunter
Head of the Swing Shift
Thanks GregNickRyanFan
I appreciate all the feedback.
It makes it easier to finish the story.
I appreciate all the feedback.
It makes it easier to finish the story.
ladyhunter
Head of the Swing Shift
Finally an update
Many, many, many, thanks to my wonderful beta Waiting
:luvlove: :adore:
Enjoy
This isn’t good
Her muffled cries couldn’t be heard as much as she tried. Her eyes continued to slam shut as quickly as she opened them. The flurry people came and went from beside her. Words came from all around her, words she knew but couldn’t place a meaning to at the moment. Words like; miscarriage and no longer viable. Those were just a few of the many words spoken that Catherine could make out as the swarm of nurses, techs, and other medical staff worked busily around her. Her body lay still on the bed as she was poked and prodded. Her knees bent and her body positioned as to reveal a not so flattering position. More than one IV was practically shoved into her veins. Catherine was too shocked to even mutter out ouch. With all the commotion surrounding her and her desire to cradle the two beings inside her, made her head spin. Unfortunately as the chaos began to die down some, she began to grasp the meaning of the words floating around her….
“Catherine, I need you to relax.” Dr. Torres voice suddenly became clear. “I know this is uncomfortable, but I need you just to relax and let us take care of you.”
She scanned the room searching for anything or anyone familiar. Her mind was focused on trying to find Tony. Then she remembered that within the almost immediate the flurry of activity, she blinked her eyes open and saw a nurse, no bigger than Lindsey, literally shove him out of the room. Unfortunately, at that moment, Catherine was lost trying to focus amongst the flurry of activity.
“What….what’s happening?” Words finally came out of her mouth. “The babies? Are they okay?” Panic filled her questions as yet one more person touched her stomach.
“Catherine, are you in pain?” The doctor asked much to the surprise of Catherine.
She had to think about it though. While she thought, all the noise and background clutter seemed to disappear for the moment. All the machines practically fell silent as if they were waiting for her answer.
“No, not really,” she whispered.
“Good”, replied the doctor, “This is what I want you to do. Just relax and I’ll let you know exactly what is happening.
The Ultrasound Tech is going to do an Ultrasound to confirm our suspicions,” The doctor immediately responded.
“Catherine, I need you to listen to me again,” Dr. Torres started again, “Baby B is no longer viable she stated after looking at the small monitor. We want to make sure Baby A is okay. Sometimes this happens in multiple pregnancies, but not usually this late in the first trimester. I know this is uncomfortable for you, but please know we are doing everything we can to keep Baby A. Again, I’ll ask, are you in pain?”
Pain is such an odd word, especially in a situation like the one she was in. Pain, as in the physical pain she was in an hour ago? The pain, as in the emotional pain, of explaining to Tony, her mother, and her daughter that she wasn’t strong enough to carry both babies? As in the pain of trying to tell Tony that he lost his son? And lastly, of trying to convince herself, the pain and the conflict, of telling herself that having not one but two babies at age 44 was in fact a good idea. That’s were she felt the real pain, of her self examination.
A heavy silence filled the room. The machines were still beeping and some fuss had begun again, but nothing like what was happening when she was first brought in. Still confined to her bed with while the panic that subsided momentarily was creeping back inside her, she asked in a week but confident voice, “What about the other one?”
“Baby A is okay for the moment. But this is what’s going to happen. You will begin to expel some matter, some material. It won’t be pleasant or comfortable. Then we need to take a look at Baby A. Do you understand what I am telling you?” The doctor’s serious face was mere inches from Catherine’s. She could see the doctor was sitting beside her bed talking to her and instructing the others.
“Yes,” Catherine said softly.
Sugarcoating life altering events, such as the one taking place, has never been Catherine’s practice. Evidence doesn’t lie, why should the person reporting do any different?
Now, facing a life altering situation of her own, the truth about her baby somehow made the situation better.
The flurry of activity died down some as not as many people seemed to be needed at the moment. Catherine could finally collect her thoughts
All she wanted to do was to close her eyes and hope the situation she was in would go away. If she closed them and fell asleep, maybe, just maybe she would wake up and find herself at home, in bed with Tony, instead of lying in a hospital bed desperately trying to hold on to one of the two babies she was carrying.
“Catherine,” the doctor shook her back to reality, “I’m going to give you some medicine to reduce the bleeding. You might feel nauseous, but if you once again, experience and pain or the nausea becomes really bad, you let me know, okay?
“And,” the doctor added with a genuinely sincere look on her face, “I’m really truly sorry this happened.”
“Thanks,” Catherine replied trying to get comfortable.
“Oh,” The doctor added as she began to step out of the room, “I’ll try to find your husband for you, I’m sure you want to see him.”
Catherine didn’t bother correcting the doctor, “Thanks I’d appreciate that.” She got out before the doctor stepped out of the room.
Now the commotion has stopped, Catherine is alone, alone with her thoughts. She begins to cradle the baby still inside her.
“This isn’t your fault.” A voice came from across the room. All the noise and flurry had died down as quiet began to fill the room.
A nurse who stayed behind to fill the doctor’s order stroked Catherine’s arm. Her face was small and her eyes were full of sympathy and concern the same as the doctors. Catherine wasn’t the first patient to be in this situation but the nurse treated Catherine that way, something Catherine appreciated right away.
“I know,” mumbled Catherine as she turned her head. The nurse had put in the medication into Catherine’s IV tube.
“We’re going to take you to another room in a few minutes. That way you can rest. Sound good?” The nurse asked not expecting an answer.
Catherine nodded slowly. She didn’t want to move to quickly or suddenly. She didn’t want to move her legs or any part of her lower body in fear of the other baby sliding out of her. Because that is what she surmised happened…. the baby slid right out of her leaving a trail of ‘material’ and ‘matter’ in his wake. A thought Catherine could not get out of her head and with a few tubes hooked up to her, she wouldn’t be allowed to forget either.
Within a few blinks of her eyes, her surrounding had changed. The room wasn’t that much different than the one she was brought into. But it was quiet and that is exactly what she wanted, quiet. No one around to plague her with her thoughts or bugging her to answer the inevitable question…. How did this happen?
Catherine tried to get her body comfortable. She moved gingerly amongst the tubes and wires still attached to her body. Again, not letting her, or anyone else that would see her, forget what has happened to her.
Crying didn’t seem appropriate, at least not at that moment. Once again her mind travelled to the idea of closing her eyes and forgetting she’s in a hospital room. Her body felt more sedated than tired, but her body seemed to want to rest and she wasn’t going to fight it. Her eyes slowly closed, her hands both resting on the somewhat smaller mound protruding from her belly. Tony was the only thing on her mind as she pictured his face….
~~~~
Catherine’s eyes opened, who knows how many hours later. A familiar sensation was filling her as she became cognizant of where she was; it was one of Tony’s hands interlacing with hers. A ‘thing’ they had between the two of them. He would slip his hand into hers and slide his long fingers in between hers. She loved how that brought them closer, just by touching hands.
Her eyes focused on him….
“Hey,” was all she could make out.
“He needs a name,” came shortly afterwards when he didn’t reply.
“What?” He quietly responded, “Who needs a name?”
“The baby,” Catherine replied weakly, “the baby needs a name, and I think he should have his father’s name.” He watched her face wince as words were a chore for her.
He didn’t say anything back, just put his finger up to her lips and motioned her to remain silent.
Suddenly her stomach churned, the urge to vomit was approaching fast. She leaned her head towards him, but instead of words that came out of her mouth….. It was vomit! Tony quickly responded by shoving the closest thing, the garbage can next to the bed.
Silence and a bit of embarrassment filled Catherine. She turned her head away from him but he turned it back towards her. The idea that he didn’t run away or even say a thing about her throwing up and it nearly hitting him was an excellent sign that he was an exceptional man. Something she already knew, the point was just made again as they both struggle to figure out what do say.
“I like that idea,” Tony finally said speak first. He really didn’t care since the baby wasn’t ever going to be part of their lives, but if it meant a lot to Catherine to have their son have his name; then he wasn’t going to fight it.
“I’m sure Lindsey would think so too,” Catherine smiled a small smile. Then she stopped mid-thought. He mind immediately went to her oldest daughter…
“Lindsey…” she breathed…..
Many, many, many, thanks to my wonderful beta Waiting
:luvlove: :adore:
Enjoy
This isn’t good
Her muffled cries couldn’t be heard as much as she tried. Her eyes continued to slam shut as quickly as she opened them. The flurry people came and went from beside her. Words came from all around her, words she knew but couldn’t place a meaning to at the moment. Words like; miscarriage and no longer viable. Those were just a few of the many words spoken that Catherine could make out as the swarm of nurses, techs, and other medical staff worked busily around her. Her body lay still on the bed as she was poked and prodded. Her knees bent and her body positioned as to reveal a not so flattering position. More than one IV was practically shoved into her veins. Catherine was too shocked to even mutter out ouch. With all the commotion surrounding her and her desire to cradle the two beings inside her, made her head spin. Unfortunately as the chaos began to die down some, she began to grasp the meaning of the words floating around her….
“Catherine, I need you to relax.” Dr. Torres voice suddenly became clear. “I know this is uncomfortable, but I need you just to relax and let us take care of you.”
She scanned the room searching for anything or anyone familiar. Her mind was focused on trying to find Tony. Then she remembered that within the almost immediate the flurry of activity, she blinked her eyes open and saw a nurse, no bigger than Lindsey, literally shove him out of the room. Unfortunately, at that moment, Catherine was lost trying to focus amongst the flurry of activity.
“What….what’s happening?” Words finally came out of her mouth. “The babies? Are they okay?” Panic filled her questions as yet one more person touched her stomach.
“Catherine, are you in pain?” The doctor asked much to the surprise of Catherine.
She had to think about it though. While she thought, all the noise and background clutter seemed to disappear for the moment. All the machines practically fell silent as if they were waiting for her answer.
“No, not really,” she whispered.
“Good”, replied the doctor, “This is what I want you to do. Just relax and I’ll let you know exactly what is happening.
The Ultrasound Tech is going to do an Ultrasound to confirm our suspicions,” The doctor immediately responded.
“Catherine, I need you to listen to me again,” Dr. Torres started again, “Baby B is no longer viable she stated after looking at the small monitor. We want to make sure Baby A is okay. Sometimes this happens in multiple pregnancies, but not usually this late in the first trimester. I know this is uncomfortable for you, but please know we are doing everything we can to keep Baby A. Again, I’ll ask, are you in pain?”
Pain is such an odd word, especially in a situation like the one she was in. Pain, as in the physical pain she was in an hour ago? The pain, as in the emotional pain, of explaining to Tony, her mother, and her daughter that she wasn’t strong enough to carry both babies? As in the pain of trying to tell Tony that he lost his son? And lastly, of trying to convince herself, the pain and the conflict, of telling herself that having not one but two babies at age 44 was in fact a good idea. That’s were she felt the real pain, of her self examination.
A heavy silence filled the room. The machines were still beeping and some fuss had begun again, but nothing like what was happening when she was first brought in. Still confined to her bed with while the panic that subsided momentarily was creeping back inside her, she asked in a week but confident voice, “What about the other one?”
“Baby A is okay for the moment. But this is what’s going to happen. You will begin to expel some matter, some material. It won’t be pleasant or comfortable. Then we need to take a look at Baby A. Do you understand what I am telling you?” The doctor’s serious face was mere inches from Catherine’s. She could see the doctor was sitting beside her bed talking to her and instructing the others.
“Yes,” Catherine said softly.
Sugarcoating life altering events, such as the one taking place, has never been Catherine’s practice. Evidence doesn’t lie, why should the person reporting do any different?
Now, facing a life altering situation of her own, the truth about her baby somehow made the situation better.
The flurry of activity died down some as not as many people seemed to be needed at the moment. Catherine could finally collect her thoughts
All she wanted to do was to close her eyes and hope the situation she was in would go away. If she closed them and fell asleep, maybe, just maybe she would wake up and find herself at home, in bed with Tony, instead of lying in a hospital bed desperately trying to hold on to one of the two babies she was carrying.
“Catherine,” the doctor shook her back to reality, “I’m going to give you some medicine to reduce the bleeding. You might feel nauseous, but if you once again, experience and pain or the nausea becomes really bad, you let me know, okay?
“And,” the doctor added with a genuinely sincere look on her face, “I’m really truly sorry this happened.”
“Thanks,” Catherine replied trying to get comfortable.
“Oh,” The doctor added as she began to step out of the room, “I’ll try to find your husband for you, I’m sure you want to see him.”
Catherine didn’t bother correcting the doctor, “Thanks I’d appreciate that.” She got out before the doctor stepped out of the room.
Now the commotion has stopped, Catherine is alone, alone with her thoughts. She begins to cradle the baby still inside her.
“This isn’t your fault.” A voice came from across the room. All the noise and flurry had died down as quiet began to fill the room.
A nurse who stayed behind to fill the doctor’s order stroked Catherine’s arm. Her face was small and her eyes were full of sympathy and concern the same as the doctors. Catherine wasn’t the first patient to be in this situation but the nurse treated Catherine that way, something Catherine appreciated right away.
“I know,” mumbled Catherine as she turned her head. The nurse had put in the medication into Catherine’s IV tube.
“We’re going to take you to another room in a few minutes. That way you can rest. Sound good?” The nurse asked not expecting an answer.
Catherine nodded slowly. She didn’t want to move to quickly or suddenly. She didn’t want to move her legs or any part of her lower body in fear of the other baby sliding out of her. Because that is what she surmised happened…. the baby slid right out of her leaving a trail of ‘material’ and ‘matter’ in his wake. A thought Catherine could not get out of her head and with a few tubes hooked up to her, she wouldn’t be allowed to forget either.
Within a few blinks of her eyes, her surrounding had changed. The room wasn’t that much different than the one she was brought into. But it was quiet and that is exactly what she wanted, quiet. No one around to plague her with her thoughts or bugging her to answer the inevitable question…. How did this happen?
Catherine tried to get her body comfortable. She moved gingerly amongst the tubes and wires still attached to her body. Again, not letting her, or anyone else that would see her, forget what has happened to her.
Crying didn’t seem appropriate, at least not at that moment. Once again her mind travelled to the idea of closing her eyes and forgetting she’s in a hospital room. Her body felt more sedated than tired, but her body seemed to want to rest and she wasn’t going to fight it. Her eyes slowly closed, her hands both resting on the somewhat smaller mound protruding from her belly. Tony was the only thing on her mind as she pictured his face….
~~~~
Catherine’s eyes opened, who knows how many hours later. A familiar sensation was filling her as she became cognizant of where she was; it was one of Tony’s hands interlacing with hers. A ‘thing’ they had between the two of them. He would slip his hand into hers and slide his long fingers in between hers. She loved how that brought them closer, just by touching hands.
Her eyes focused on him….
“Hey,” was all she could make out.
“He needs a name,” came shortly afterwards when he didn’t reply.
“What?” He quietly responded, “Who needs a name?”
“The baby,” Catherine replied weakly, “the baby needs a name, and I think he should have his father’s name.” He watched her face wince as words were a chore for her.
He didn’t say anything back, just put his finger up to her lips and motioned her to remain silent.
Suddenly her stomach churned, the urge to vomit was approaching fast. She leaned her head towards him, but instead of words that came out of her mouth….. It was vomit! Tony quickly responded by shoving the closest thing, the garbage can next to the bed.
Silence and a bit of embarrassment filled Catherine. She turned her head away from him but he turned it back towards her. The idea that he didn’t run away or even say a thing about her throwing up and it nearly hitting him was an excellent sign that he was an exceptional man. Something she already knew, the point was just made again as they both struggle to figure out what do say.
“I like that idea,” Tony finally said speak first. He really didn’t care since the baby wasn’t ever going to be part of their lives, but if it meant a lot to Catherine to have their son have his name; then he wasn’t going to fight it.
“I’m sure Lindsey would think so too,” Catherine smiled a small smile. Then she stopped mid-thought. He mind immediately went to her oldest daughter…
“Lindsey…” she breathed…..
Aww, that's so sad. I'm glad Tony was there for her. And that he didn't get mad or disgusted that she almost puked on him.
MacsGirlMel
Mac's Personal Assistant
aww yeah it was sad *hugs them*
*hugs them*