Re: Nick Fic Song Fic Challenge
mfcsi don't worry about it, your reviews are fine! No such things as one that's too short. Hope you feel better soon.
One more review from me. More coming tomorrow! Sorry its taking me so long!
ETA: I managed to sneak in another review...
A Southern Boy’s Mama
Love the dialogue as your opening line. Heck it nearly made me turn around!! You really brought Catherine to life from the start with your descriptions and it’s easy to see why Nick has sympathy for her.
Interesting little take on Greg! Unapologetic gossip, I love it! Nice bit of background information with the reference to Sam Braun. I love that Nick is caring enough to want to try and help Catherine out, very true to character.
Your dialogue flows easily, I can almost hear them in my mind! Catherine still seems edgy and moody as you’ve managed to capture the emotion through their words.
Your introduction of Walter was interesting, showcasing the important details leaving the rest to imagination. Almost like a CSI who instantly notes the things that are ‘off’, you’ve drawn our attention to Nick’s observations and shown us what’s important without giving anything away.
I had to google Pearl/Jack and I *think* I get the reference. In which case it’s brilliant! The dialogue between Nick and Walter was captivating. You’ve written Walter with such clarity that I honestly want to reach through the screen and pelt him myself. Well done getting me so upset over an OC!
Nick hoping the interview ‘went the right way’ caught my attention. What does he know that we don’t hmmm? This certainly piqued my interest and had me reading on for more! You didn’t leave me waiting long though, I was in stitches reading about how Walter got his injuries. He did deserve every single one though!! Beat up by his own kids, how priceless
I sniggered along with Nick but had the luxury of actually being able to laugh out loud.
I love the mercurial change of mood. Really attention grabbing. From laughing to ‘wtf?’ in the space of a few sentences. The transition was genius.
I felt like Nick did, incredulous at Walter’s obvious chauvinistic ways and ineptitude. And you could just tell the moment he’d gone too far. I’ve seen Nick’s stern glare too often and could totally picture it here. Too bad Walter didn’t back down!
I love Officer Mitch btw, thank you for writing him in your story!
The dialogue during the arrest was great, it really flowed and again, I could hear it all in my mind as I read. Walter still doesn’t get it, and your gift as a writer shows as you kept him entirely within his own character, one that is easy to loathe.
I absolutely love that Walter was the one to speak the line that became your title. That was unexpected and a stroke of genius.
Your ending was good, and sad in a way. Nick unable to handle any more change. It was a nice touch that he was open enough with Catherine to admit that, and a lovely way to reinforce the friendship they have between them.
Your story was an interesting interpretation on the song, and I think it is unique in that you didn’t refer to the song at all in your fic. I did have to read it twice to see where the inspiration was but once I did it was so obvious.
Bravo!
For A Minute There I Lost Myself
The lyric you used to introduce the story is my favourite part of the song. Gives it a nice feel for the story to come.
I like how your story starts just as a case ends, and we’re immediately invested into how Nick feels about Oliver Hudson. I felt bad for Brass, he’s only doing his job and he can’t act outside the law. This scene was an excellent use of foreshadowing and dialogue to set the stage for your later scenes.
Nick’s interaction with Hudson was spot on in character, I can really picture Nick struggling to hold himself back. His disgust was palpable and I really empathized with him. Honestly I wanted to spit!
I like how you used the lyrics to separate and introduce your scenes. Gives us a little hint as to what’s ahead, although nothing could have prepared me for your final scene!
Nick walking in a daze down the strip was poignant and sweet. You get a real sense of his loneliness with a sea of humanity around but he’s so lost in thought he doesn’t notice them. Excellent imagery here.
Nick’s thoughts are a perfect mix of reason and self-recrimination. He’s so honest with himself here that you have us really feeling for him. I found myself thinking he really didn’t have to be so hard on himself! You’ve kept Nick in character with his honesty, empathy and humility.
I think Nick should be proud he didn’t hit the guy. He’s been physical before (Gumdrops, Fannysmackin’) so we know what he is capable of. I like how his train of thought progresses here. Asking himself questions so that his thought randomly drifts into a daydream.
Interesting technique here, leaving us to imagine for ourselves what kind of plans he’d make, the things he’d have to do and actions he would have to take. A little tribute to the concept of the challenge, each writer coming up with their own interpretation. I’m sure each reader had their own image in their mind. Genius of you to give us that opportunity.
And yeah, if a guy suddenly stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and started laughing, I’d give him a wide berth too! I love how he’s all of a sudden part of the crowd again though. Beautiful transition here. And the humour, yes I had to laugh at the idea of Nick as a comic book superhero.
Great way to end the story, with Nick chuckling at himself and his bad mood dissipated.
Your story was a great read taking us from one emotion to the next effortlessly. Your transitions were beautifully timed and I really enjoyed the atmosphere you set with Nick against the world and then suddenly a part of it again. (And I will never, ever let go of the image of Nick in tights
)
Well done!
