ButterFlied92
Lab Technician
All right, I started this about three weeks ago, but I had to go away for the past three weeks, and the thread was pushed off of the board. So, to my followers, as I have promised, I am reposting all chapters created up to this point and will have the next chapter up sometime tomorrow. Hope you enjoy, for those just joining, and it refreshes, for the past readers who remember.
~Ash
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Chapter One
The sharp ringing of a cell phone awoke her, the brunette siting at a small table in the break room of the C.S.I. labs in Las Vegas. Wiping her eyes, wearily, she stole a glance at her watch. Cursing under her breath, she picked up the phone and groaned. The caller I.D. read, 'Gil Grissom'. "Sidle." Her head sank into her palm, the phone pressed against her ear, her eyes painfully eyeing the empty bottle of champagne on the table in front of her, tears stinging her eyes.
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"Sara! Where are you? Are you all right?!" My voice quickened, alarmed at her grogginess. There was no answer. "Sara!" A few cops gave me a glance as I screamed into the phone, chuckling and shaking their heads.
"Wha-? Yeah, yeah I'm fine, Grissom. I'm sorry, I lost track of time. I'll be there in a little bit." My eyebrows raised, speculating her over the phone.
"Sara..." My voice toughened, scolding her as if I was her father. I cringed instantly, regretting the horrible comparison. "Sara, you sound exhausted, are you sure you're all right to drive?" I leaned against the side of the small home, our latest crime scene, gazing absently up into the sky, cloudless and bright blue. I stood up and straightened, shocked at the sound coming from the other end of the line. "Sara...Sara, are you crying?" I pressed gently, but the sobbing only got louder.
"I'm sorry, Gil. I'm so, so sorry."
"Sara, what are you sorry about?" I started walking fast, almost jogging, to the main set up where my truck was. Her sobbing persisted, and now I started to run, the soles of my shoes hiting the sand quickly, knocking rocks from their holds and startling people on the way, including Catherine and Greg.
"I'm so sorry, I'm sorry." It was killing me, torturing me as to what was wrong. I hold the speaker away from my mouth as my breath becomes heavy. Hopping in the Tahoe, I frantically searched my pocket for the keys and thrust them into the ignition.
"Sara, Sara I need you to calm down. I'll be back to the lab within ten minutes, okay?! I'm coming Sara." The truck jumped to life as Catherine ran over, her hair blowing behind her in the breeze.
"No, Gil, don't. I'm fine. I'll be okay."
"Sara, I'm coming." Ending the call, I dropped the phone onto the passenger's seat and put the truck in reverse.
"Grissom! Where are you going?" Her face was blank with confusion as my eyes met her's.
"Watch Greg and process the scene." My voice was steady, firm, in control. I'm breaking apart with anticipated worry, and yet, my voice is calm. Catherine's mouth closed, head nodded, and backed off the truck as I backed up, speeding out of the barricade towards the lab.
'I've never felt so worried, so anxious, so...emotional. In one phone call, my head is reeling, my world spinning, and yet Sara's face is as clear as ever. Oh, hope no cops saw that.' I look back over my shoulder at the junction, the red light blazing like an omen. 'But an omen of what?' I murmur out loud, almost hitting another truck, distracted by Sara.
I pull into the parking lot, glancing at my watch. I made it in half the time. I practically leap from the Tahoe, only pausing slightly as I grab my keys and phone, slamming the door closed as I dash to the front door. Fumbling, I somehow manage to put my cell and keys into my pocket while swiping my key card. The red light turned to green and I sighed. ‘Too many red lights for my taste,’ I run through the hallway, yelling and catching glances. “Sara!Has anyone seen Sara?!” Panting, I skid into the lab, just as Archie was heading out. “Archie, have you seen Sara?” My eyes stay wide, staring at him as he looks me over.
“Gris, you o-”
“Where is she, Archie? ”
“Well, I did see her in the break room, she wasn’t looking too good. I think she was drinking.” My breath catches in my throat, stopping everything around me. My head swims through the times I saw her drinking, trying to stop her. Especially after I turned her down. Why oh why did I do that? Men make mistakes when they’re in love. ‘I love her. I love Sara Sidle.’ Reeling backwards, I run back out of the lab with Archie calling behind me, “You’re welcome?”
The offices and departments blur by as I run towards the break room, ignoring everyone and everything that’s in between me and Sara. Skidding to a halt, I enter the break room, and at the table, Sara sat slumped over in her chair. Sinking to one knee next to her, I gently lift up her head and look into her beautiful eyes. Something was wrong. They were blurred, dilated, and she was cold and pale. “Sara! Sara, what’s wrong?! Why are you sorry?!” I looked around the room, my widened blue eyes resting on a large bottle of champagne...empty on the table in front of her. My eyes widened even farther in sorrow and fear, heart breaking in two.
“Sara, what did you do?! Sara, what did you do to yourself?! ” My voice was soft, small, fearful, and it didn’t sound right. I was the no-emotions man. If I broke down, than how would everyone else manage? But it was true. I felt so small in that room, in the position, fearful of what Sara could actually do to herself. “I need the truth.” I pressed, her soft skin against my hands, her eyes dull and just staring back, a tear or two slipping from her eyes. Standing up quickly, I lifted her up bridal style and turned to lay her on the floor, to relax her from whatever happened, when...click Something fell on the floor, and when I looked, I sat her down in horror and stared at the object. An empty prescription bottle, a bright, neon red sticker reading plainly, ‘WARNING! Do not take with alcohol!' I collapse from my squatting position to my knees on the floor, suddenly realizing what she’s doing, too late.
“Sara, why?! Oh Sara! I’m sorry. I’m sorry I turned you down when I loved you. Still love you. I’ve watched you everyday, so worried about what your next move will take you. And this is what I get! I deserve it, but I truly, passionately love you. I just wanted so much more for you, more than what I could give you. Children, a family, someone your age, a man who you’ll look at more than a husband and a man you want to spend your life with than your boss and mentor.” Slipping my arm underneath her neck and knees, I somehow managed to get her laid across my lap, the one arm still supporting her neck. “I love you, Sara. Please don’t do this too me.” Tears pricked my eyes, but they didn’t come. Taking a finger, I gently trailed it across her jawline, flawed but still beautiful, and pushed a strand of her bright brown hair out of her eyes.
Steps entered the break room behind me, a gasp, followed by the crashing of glass on the tile floor. A body fell to their knees next to me, but I was too distracted to even care who it was, even if it was Ecklie. “S-s-s-sara?! Grissom, what’s wrong with her?!” I lifted my eyes to find Nick, gazing worriedly into Sara’s distancing face. I gulped down the tears threatening to fall before speaking, wanting so badly to go back to three years ago and say yes, yes I’d go out with her. I’d treat her so well, try to comfort and appreciate her.
“Nick, I-I need you to call an ambulance!” My voice was still small, gazing at Sara, her hands limply wrapped around my neck. There was no movement next to me, and I glared up at Nick, still staring at her. “Nick, NOW!!” My voice ripped to full fury, ripping with fear at the end. Startling him, Nick leaped up in one bound and dashed out of the room. I lifted her head and let it rest in the crook of my neck, embracing her with my arms, wishing this could have happened in a different set of events. “Sara, I’ve always loved you, since the first time I saw you.”
Choking, she lifted her head and I kissed her on the forehead, wishing it wouldn’t be the last time I could hold her. “I know,” she whispered as her eyes met mine. “I’m just sorry now that you love me. Make it stop, Gil. Don’t leave me.” Kissing her on the cheek, a single tear slipped from my eye and down my cheek as I clutched her closer.
“Don’t worry, I’ll never leave you.”
Chapter One:Sara
'I can't do this, no, not anymore.' I swallowed another three pills with a large swig of the champagne. Shaking my head in disbelief, the last four pills flew into my mouth, mixing with the champagne on my tongue as I drank down the last of the licquor, the last of the pills going with it. I gripped the empty pill bottle in my hand, the other grasping my stomach. The nasuea was horrible and the room was spinning, my mind going blank. "I don't want to die," I groan, my forehead resting on the cool table. 'But he drove me to it. Ripped my heart out again and again, breaking it every single day to pieces. All I wanted was comfort when he hurts me as much as my past does. Gil Grissom drove me to suicide.'
It hurt, not the pills and champagne mixing(although it did), but my heart. I still love him, after all I went through. I love him, and yet he loves no one. He has no emotion, none at all. How could a man of no emotions help me? Will he miss me? Will he cry, tortured like I was? Maybe this'll show him what kind of hell he's put me through. Maybe he'll run to Sofia, little Sofia and she'll comfort him. He wasn't there for me. No one was. No one will miss me. They'll remember, but no one will miss. I'm no one. No one at all. In fact Archie just walked by, looked at me, and walked past. How typical.
The annoying chirping of my cell pulled me from my thoughts. 'Damn, I knew I forgot to do something. Who wants invisible Sara Sidle?' I turn my phone over and my breath catches in my throat. 'Gil Grissom' it read, so I open it, realizing that I was supposed to be at a scene. "Sidle."
"Sara! Where are you? Are you all right?!" His voice, sweet as nectar, was...worried? Worried for me? He doesn't care, just about the scene, I'm late. "Sara!" Or maybe not...
"Wha-? Yeah, yeah I'm fine, Grissom. I'm sorry, I lost track of time. I'll be there in a little bit." My voice, it's...different. It's taking hold of me.
"Sara..." He's concerned, maybe...maybe he does love me. Maybe he does feel. The tears, they're falling down my cheeks. I don't want to die, I love him and he might love me. I want to live. But there's nothing I can do except let my world fall around me. Sobs wrack my chest, breathing uneven.
"Sara...Sara, are you crying?" His voice was soft, comforting. I want this to stop. I'm so confused, and dizzy.
"I'm sorry, Gil." I sobbed, unable to control myself. "I'm so, so sorry." I started crying louder, thank God the door of the break room was closed. 'I'm sorry I didn't hold, convince you that you love me. I'm sorry I'm dying, because of you.'
"Sara, what are you sorry about?!" As if he read my mind. I just kept sobbing, holding the table. My throat was dry, my voice inaudible. No one would hear a cry for help. All I could do was cry.
"I'm so sorry, I'm sorry." I sobbed, regretting the fact I brought pills everywhere, and sorry that I brought a bottle of champagne in today, incredibly sorry that I believed that Grissom really didn't feel for me.
"Sara, Sara, I need you to calm down for me. I'll be back to the lab in ten minutes, okay? I'm coming, Sara." Over on his end, I heard a truck start and the sound of someone running. I couldn't let him find me. It would destroy me, him, us. I sobbed, I didn't want to die, and not in his arms.
"No, Gil, don't. I'm fine. I'll be okay." That's a lie, a huge one. I'm dying at the break room table, and I don't want too, yet I'll be okay?
"Sara, I'm coming." The call terminated, and somehow, I close the phone, dropping it on the table. I need help...now. I stand, miraculously walking to the end of the table before collapsing into the chair there. Everything's spinning, and I'm loosing my grip. I had to face him, my boss, my love. I let my aching head to fall to the cool table top again, my hand still clutching the empty pill bottle.
Yelling, somewhere. Farther away, in the front of the labs, was yelling. Only one voice though. "Sara! Has anyone seen Sara?!" Running, padded footsteps reaching the break room. Someone's next to me, lifting my face with their hands, warm and comforting. Grissom. Hope flooded me, with desperation and sorrow, lots and lost of sorrow. Pain wracked his face as he looked me over. "Sara!" he whispered, his voice cracking. "Sara, what's wrong?! Why are you sorry?!" His eyes left mine, searching the room for only for a moment though, before his body went rigid and turned back to me.
"Sara, what did you do? Sara, what did you do to yourself?!" The tears were spilling again as I silently tried to tell him, 'I overdosed, I'm dying, and I don't want to I love you, and you can save me.' "I need the truth." His bright blue eyes, so handsome, were glassed and lost, afraid as his thumbs traced my cheeks, so comforting. He moved, and I didn't want him to leave me, but then I was spinning faster, for real. I felt protected, safe in Gil's arms, and I couldn't feel my hands or feet anymore, and I heard the pill bottle hit the floor. He laid me down on the floor, and turned back with the bottle in his hands. His eyes threatened to overflow as they widened, his hands dropping the pills and looking to the champagne, then to me. The tears keep coming, I can't stop, I don't want to leave yet, not yet. His arms slid under me and pulled me to him, his hand supporting my neck.
"Sara, why?! Oh, Sara! I'm sorry. I'm sorry I turned you down when I loved you. Still love you! I've watched you everyday, so worried where your next move might take you. And this is what I get! I deserve it, but I truly, passionately love you. I-I just wanted so much more for you, more than what I could give you. Children, a family, someone your age, a man who you would see more as a husband, a man you want to spend the rest of your life with than a boss and mentor." He stopped for a minute, chest heaving heavily as I tried to absorb thrown at me through my grogginess. He loves me, he truly does, and this is what I give out. "I love you, Sara. Please, please don't do this to me."
My tears still fall down my cheeks, a meek smile on my face as his right ring finger traced my jawline, pushing away hair and tears. Someone walked in behind him, but he was blocking them. I gingerly, limply wrapped my arms around Gil's neck as a glass broke, Nick falling next to Grissom on his knees.
"S-s-s-sara?! Grissom, what's wrong with her?!" Nick's eyes were wide with concern. I could hardly feel anything now, besides Grissom. He swallowed quickly, gulping before turning to Nick.
"Nick, I-I need you to call an ambulance!" Nick's eyes connected with mine, as I tried to plead for the call. But Grissom's voice sprang to life, echoing in the room. "Nick, NOW!!" He jumped in one leap, speeding out of the break room into the opposite office, quickly picking up the phone, his mouth moving quickly as he kept glancing back and Grissom and me. His gentle hands holding me close to his chest, his sweet, delicious cologne(never knew he wore that...) wafting into my nose, but that too was slipping from me.
"Sara, I've always loved you, since the first time I saw you." The dryness in my throat burned, unbearable as I started wheezing, my pulse weakening yet. His lips met my clammy forehead, my eyes trailing to his as he reluctantly pulled away. How could he not be crying? Grissom, you'll never cease to amaze me, and that's one reason why I love you. I continue coughing before I whisper.
"I know. I'm just sorry now that you love me." And it was true. I was killing him with me, taking his love away. "Make it stop, Gil. Don't leave me." It was spinning again when I felt him lift me closer to him than before, when I felt him kiss my cheek tenderly, and his...moist? cheek on mine. He was crying. Gil Grissom had broken down. For me. Insignificant Sara Sidle.
"Don't worry," he whispered in my ear, sirens approaching in the background, his voice cracking with fear.
"I'll never leave you..."
Chapter Two:Grissom
She wasn't moving, at all. The only thing that told me she was alive was her shallow breathing. I was crying, the tears drenching me cheeks as my hand cradeled her head, fingers running through her hair. I was the one at fault, guilty of killing her. My other hand shakily reaches out for her wrist, grasping it for a pulse. "You shouldn't be sorry, I'm the one who should be apologizing. I'm sorry, please don't do this. Hang on, Sara. I know you can!"
There was noise all around me. The door of the break room pushes open, two men giving orders to each other as there's clicks of locks. One man, caucasian, thirty something, smoothed black hair bent down to me, wearing an EMS uniform. "Sir, I need to put Ms. Sidle on the gurney. You can come in the ambulance." My blue eys dried somewhat, hope coming back, but still glassy. I stood up, still holding Sara, my beautiful Sara, and gently laid her on the gurney. Her eyes are glazed, but her hands defiantly stay wrapped around my neck. Kissing her cheek, I gingerly pry her fingers away as the paramedics strap her down.
"I'm not leaving you, I promised. Not now, not ever." The scene's surreal, as if in slow motion right out of a movie. Standing at the door is Jim, Nick, and Warrick, all solemn. All sporting sorrow in their eyes. But they don't know the pain I'm feeling, the regret and guilt I feel. I just glance at them, tears running down my face, before dashing after the paramedics out the back of the labs. The bright sun is blinding, and I'm thankful for the shade of the ambulance as I jump in, doors slammed behind me. But none of that matters, because as every second goes by, I see Sara's pulse grow weaker on the screen.
The sirens wail as the ambulance jerks forward, speeding out of the parking lot and onto the road. Instantly grabbing her hand, I bend my face down to her's, her eyes growing distant and cold. The paramedics are calling readings to the driver, calling them into the hospital. Her soft hair runs through my fingers as I gently caress her face. The beeping keeps slowing, yet Sara is alive, still. And hopefully will for a long time.
"Gil, I-"
"Shhhhhhhh. Rest, Sara. You'll be fine. I love you, too. I won't let anything happen to you." A meek smile spreads across her face, eyes drooping shut in weakness as I feel a small smile spread across my face too. But it's short lived. Another sound, so heart-wrenching and stomach dropping screams out through the ambulance.
The pulse flatlines.
Chapter Three:Grissom
"SARA! SARA, NO!!!" No, she can't die No, she's not going to I promised her I lean over her, my lips touching her's, as if a single kiss could bring her back.
"John! Stop the ambulance! I need you to resusitate!" Two hands grabbed my shoulders, pulling me away from her into the back corner of the ambulance. The heart-wrenching, never ending squeel of the machine still echoes out over the calls of the paramedic.
"Charging...Clear!" My eyes widen in horror, even farther as tears leak, as her body jumps a little, the straps pulling her back onto the gurney.
"SARA!!"
"George, grab the seditives! He's going ballistic!"
"Charging up to 260 now. Clear!" Her body jumps again, the pulse does not. I'm sobbing shaking in the younger man's arms as the third paramedic's trying to find a needle for the seditives. But I can't leave Sara.
"Sara, I know you can pull through! Sara, I love you! Don't do this to me!!!" I'm struggling against his push against the wall, trying to see around his head.
"Charging to 380. Clear!"
"Other cabinet, George!! The needles are in the OTHER cabinet!"
"SARA!!!!"
"Recharging, clear!!" Her body jumps again and my eyes dance horribly between the screen, that horrid screen, and her beautiful face. And that evil screech is louder than ever. The paramedic with the irons just stands loosely, gazing upon her body.
"No, SARA!!" Pushing the paramedic away, finally, I crawl to her side, her motionless side, throwing myself over her. Her hands, cold, eyes closed and unfluttering, limp. "No, no, no, NO, she's not gone!"
Once again, my lips fall upon her's as I hear in the background, "Dan! Toss the seditives! I got the syringe!" I pull back, not wanting to let go, and feel a painful stinging in my neck and fall to the floor in a faint.
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Seconds later, baffling the paramedics as Grissom lies unconscious on the floor of the ambulance,the pulseometer jumps from it's evil squeel to a slow, steady beating.
Chapter Four:Grissom
The smell, that's what hits me first. My head is throbbing, and my neck feels inflamed on the right side. My blue eyes flutter, and everything rushes back.
Overdose.
Seditives.
Resusitacion.
Flatlined Pulses.
Ambulances.
Sara.
My beautiful Sara. I sit up quickly, instantly sorry for that. The room spins unevenly as I determinely swing my legs over the bed. The bed? The white walls, disinfectant smell, iron barred beds. I'm in the hospital. My hand instinctively goes to my head, a large bump over the entire back of my head. I groan, and a nurse comes around.
"Ah, Mr. Grissom, you've awoken. You're free to go as soon as you're ready."
"How long has it been?"
"Ummm," checking down to her wrist, the young brunette shakes back the scrubs and looks back at him. "It's been two and a half hours since admittance." 'At least two and a half hours she's been dead. I'm at fault, I killed her. I promised I'd never leave, protect her, and look what that did.' "Mr. Grissom, are you okay?" The nurse pulled closer, eyeing me as I teared, tears falling down my face. My eyes shut defiantly, shaking my head back and forth.
"No." My voice cracks as I turn, looking around the room. My utility belt lays on the chair next to me, the gun fully loaded in the holster still. Not even stalling, watching the nurse hurry quickly out of the room, back to the nurses' station most likely, I grab the gun. Its smooth, gentle appearance puts a smile on my face. I can finally be back with Sara, and truly stay with her forever. The holster unbuckles and I pull the gun up to my eyes, looking it over. Jim insisted I kept it, just for emergencies. Does this qualify, Jim? Losing your most loved possesion, not even a possesion, a love, and feeling at fault? Feeling guilty for her death and now you can't live without her? Well, who gives a damn what he thinks, I can't go on like this. Tormented and cruelly tortured as I continue on, her lifeless body in the ground.
The barrel feels so comforting, against my temple. The nurse runs back in with Security guys and screams, followed by a second scream, Catherine. "GRISSOM!!! What do you think you're doing?!"
I shake my head, cocking the gun. "I loved her, more than anyone could possibly understand or know, even her. Now I'm at fault for her death, and I can't live without her or the guilt. I'm sorry, Cath." My finger tenses as I'm about to pull the trigger when realization crosses her tormented face.
"Is this about Sara?!"
"Who else could I be talking about? Now, please let me finish thi-"
"She's alive!"
"What do you mean? I watched her die in front of me! I held her cold, limp body in my arms! I watched her die because I killed her inside, time and time again! How could she possibly be ALIVE??!!" I was furiated, tears rappidly streaking my cheeks as I stared Catherine down. How stupid does she think I am? I watched the love of my life die in front of me and she's trying to tell me she's alive??!
"Sara! She came back after they knocked you out!! Grissom, Sara's ALIVE!!" The gun fell from my hands onto the tile floor and just in time, I grabbed the iron sides of the bed, cold and slippery on my clammy hands, as my knees buckled from beneath me.
"She...she's alive? Oh my..she's alive." My hands cover my face, torn in confusion, love, sorrow, and hope as I lay on my back, too fatigued and dizzy, tormented, to get up. "She's...alive," was all I could whisper between sobs as Catherine sat me up and wrapped her arms around me, embracing me.
Chapter Five:Grissom
"Shhhhhh, Gris, it's okay. She's alive. She's just asleep right now. It's alright."
"No, it's not alright You have no idea what I've just been through. The phone call she answered and I felt pure terror. When I found her, sorrow, burning pain, fear ripped through me. In the ambulance I went from hopeful to shocked, from torn to heartbroken beyond belief. Add the knowledge that I forced this upon her with all I've done, and I'm just a broken, confused, and lost wreck." Catherine just looked at me before gently rubbing her hands down my back, trying to soothe me. It wasn't working. "Where is she? Where's Sara? I need to see her."
"Sir, Mr. Grissom, we should take you down to the ward, just for a check up..." One of the Security guys stepped forward, young and forceful, nodding his head.
"No! I'm not going to the psych ward on a gurney, I'm walking there to see Sara." Shakily standing, my head felt on fire, the familiar sensation of everything collapsing around me flooding my head as I staggered forward, the Security detail holding their guns out toward me.
"Mr. Grissom, it's standard procedure when someone attempts suicide, even on false belief, on hospital property, they must be taken to the psych ward. Now, we can take you gently, or you we can forcibly take you." I shake my head, but Catherine’s grip tightens as I try to step forward.
“Gil, calm down. They just want to make sure you’re okay...”
“Make sure I’m okay? Make sure I’m OKAY? Of course I’m not okay! Did you not just listen to me?! I thought I lost her, the sunshine of my life, the point of my living! I wouldn’t have been able to live without her, I just wouldn’t have been able to pass the buck of her death to anyone but myself.” My head hangs low, and my eyes catch Catherine motioning them back.
“He’s just had a long day, traumatic event. They were very, very close. He’s not suicidal. If Gilbert Grissom was determined for death, he’d be long gone.” Her arm wrapped around my shoulders, but it wasn’t the same. I needed Sara. She was my life, my oxygen to breathe. Without her, I’d be dead. If it wasn’t for Catherine, I would be dead. Laying on the cold tile floor. While Sara was still alive. I shudder, and continue to walk forward, staring at the ground as we enter the wing where Sara’s being kept and into the waiting room. Everyone’s there. Nick, Warrick, Al, Jim, Greg, Archie, Hodges, even Ecklie? But there my boss sat, solemn with everyone else, but there was an evil glitch in his eyes. Or was it just my mind playing tricks on me. It wouldn’t be the first time... The first one to rise was Jim, walking slowly over to me. Our eyes meet, both swelling with tears. My hand extends forward, but I’m pulled slowly into a hug, a strong, supporting hug.
Then came Nick, and Warrick, one by one they all came forward, arms around me, trying to soothe what could only be soothed by Sara. Even Greg, the jokester he is, was crying and threw his arms around me. For a while we stood there, as I, Gil Grissom, the one falling apart, was trying to comfort him. “Will she be okay?” he whispered, and that’s when I pulled away. I couldn’t take it anymore. Slowly, full of melancholy I walked to the most uninhabited part of the waiting room, burrying my face into my hands. Even Ecklie, prick that he is, came over and patted me on the back.
“It’s alright, Gil. She was destined to try anyway.” I stopped, dead in thought, and gazed up at him, his evil maniacal face twisted into a grin.
“What did you say?” My voice was quiet, full of anger, and the whole room stopped, the team’s eyes upon the two of us.
“I said, Sara was going to kill herself anyway. She’s a waste, Grissom. Just an emotional psychopath.” I stood quickly and walked toward him, Ecklie backing off a little.
“Grissom...” Nick’s voice rumbled as I stalked Ecklie, farther across the room. My fist flew, full into the nose, sending him crumbling on the floor.
“Don’t you EVER talk about her like that again!! EVER!!” My knuckles throbbed, nothing compared to my head though. I turn, walking back to my seat to return to mourning her dangling life.
“GRISSOM!” Archie's yell rings out in the room and I turn, and cold spreads from my stomach. Ecklie’s evil grin stares me in the face as I look down, a knife fully imbedded into my abdomen. “Payback’s a bitch, ain’t she, Gil?” I sway, everything going black and fall into Warrick’s arms as I see Nick and Jim launch on Ecklie before everything tumbles into darkness and cold, and unfeeling. Just like death.
“A Doctor!! We need a doctor, NOW!!!”
Chapter Six: POV 3rd Person
It was chaos, mass chaos in the waiting room at Desert Palms Hospital. Conrad Ecklie fenced off Nick and Jim with a knife, as they counter acted with their guns. Greg ran forward and out of the room, screaming down the hallway for Security and doctors. Catherine and Warrick gazed over Grissom, eyes fluttering, a crimson tide flowing from his stomach onto the mint green carpet. Ripping the cotton button up jacket from herself, Catherine wrapped the white cloth around Grissom's stab, wide and deep across the front, as Warrick supported his head.
Al Robbins ambled toward Grissom and put pressure on the wound, ordering one of them to perform CPR after finding Gil's weak, decreasing pulse. Catherine looked to Warrick, the man's eyes wide. "I don't know how!" he exclaimed, as Catherine lowered her lips to Grissom's, moving her blonde, lengthy hair out of the way.
A shot rang out in the air, Jim standing over a falling Ecklie, a bullet in his heart as blood spilled from a slice in the officer’s arm. A wave of doctors, nurses, and Security men filled the room, Greg leading the way and kneeling at his boss' side. Four Security men stood dumbfounded, gazing at the dying body of the man they had tried to take to the psych ward not even fifteen minutes earlier. Catherine, Warrick, and Al were all pushed back by doctors, yelling out orders to the nurses running in and out of the room. A bed was wheeled in, and with the utmost care, Grissom’s unconscious body was loaded onto the bed as the doctors shouted to head to the ER.
Security ushered the remnants of the LVPD crime lab team out of the murder scene and called in the police, requesting a nearby forensics team since the actual team was the crime itself. They stood there, dumbfounded. All in an instant, Sara was overdosed, Grissom barely hanging onto life, not even sure if he’ll make it, and Ecklie lay dead in the waiting room. Catherine broke down first, sobbing into Warrick’s shoulder as he smoothed her hair, everyone standing next to the room. Al looked down at his clothes, covered with blood and a doctor ushered Jim to the ER for stitching of the slice to the bone. In an instant, the whole family was falling apart.
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“Put the mask on him, serious bleeding and organ damage. Extensive surgery, and be gentle, he...he might not make it through. This isn’t the average citizen, so let’s give it all we got, for Miss Sidle’s sake.” The worried expressions upon their faces, young and old, reflected the grave face Sara Sidle displayed in her bed.
“Where’s Grissom? I want him now! Where’s the team?!” She was tired, exhausted, and weak. The nurse just shook her head, in the know about the situation down the hall.
“You can’t see them right now. There’s been...an accident.”
“What?! What do you mean an accident? ” Her face was frightened, even paler than when she died, knuckles almost transparent from clutching the blanket over her legs. No, if something happened to Grissom, or Cath, or Nicky, or Greg, any of them, her miraculous revival was worth nothing.
“I’m not at liberty to discuss that Miss Sidle. Now please, you need rest.” She nodded curtly and exited, leaving Sara in the dark room alone. She rolled onto her side, gazing out the window onto Las Vegas, the slim streaks of dawn just peaking over the horizon, illuminating silent tears racing down her cheeks.
~Ash
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Chapter One
The sharp ringing of a cell phone awoke her, the brunette siting at a small table in the break room of the C.S.I. labs in Las Vegas. Wiping her eyes, wearily, she stole a glance at her watch. Cursing under her breath, she picked up the phone and groaned. The caller I.D. read, 'Gil Grissom'. "Sidle." Her head sank into her palm, the phone pressed against her ear, her eyes painfully eyeing the empty bottle of champagne on the table in front of her, tears stinging her eyes.
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"Sara! Where are you? Are you all right?!" My voice quickened, alarmed at her grogginess. There was no answer. "Sara!" A few cops gave me a glance as I screamed into the phone, chuckling and shaking their heads.
"Wha-? Yeah, yeah I'm fine, Grissom. I'm sorry, I lost track of time. I'll be there in a little bit." My eyebrows raised, speculating her over the phone.
"Sara..." My voice toughened, scolding her as if I was her father. I cringed instantly, regretting the horrible comparison. "Sara, you sound exhausted, are you sure you're all right to drive?" I leaned against the side of the small home, our latest crime scene, gazing absently up into the sky, cloudless and bright blue. I stood up and straightened, shocked at the sound coming from the other end of the line. "Sara...Sara, are you crying?" I pressed gently, but the sobbing only got louder.
"I'm sorry, Gil. I'm so, so sorry."
"Sara, what are you sorry about?" I started walking fast, almost jogging, to the main set up where my truck was. Her sobbing persisted, and now I started to run, the soles of my shoes hiting the sand quickly, knocking rocks from their holds and startling people on the way, including Catherine and Greg.
"I'm so sorry, I'm sorry." It was killing me, torturing me as to what was wrong. I hold the speaker away from my mouth as my breath becomes heavy. Hopping in the Tahoe, I frantically searched my pocket for the keys and thrust them into the ignition.
"Sara, Sara I need you to calm down. I'll be back to the lab within ten minutes, okay?! I'm coming Sara." The truck jumped to life as Catherine ran over, her hair blowing behind her in the breeze.
"No, Gil, don't. I'm fine. I'll be okay."
"Sara, I'm coming." Ending the call, I dropped the phone onto the passenger's seat and put the truck in reverse.
"Grissom! Where are you going?" Her face was blank with confusion as my eyes met her's.
"Watch Greg and process the scene." My voice was steady, firm, in control. I'm breaking apart with anticipated worry, and yet, my voice is calm. Catherine's mouth closed, head nodded, and backed off the truck as I backed up, speeding out of the barricade towards the lab.
'I've never felt so worried, so anxious, so...emotional. In one phone call, my head is reeling, my world spinning, and yet Sara's face is as clear as ever. Oh, hope no cops saw that.' I look back over my shoulder at the junction, the red light blazing like an omen. 'But an omen of what?' I murmur out loud, almost hitting another truck, distracted by Sara.
I pull into the parking lot, glancing at my watch. I made it in half the time. I practically leap from the Tahoe, only pausing slightly as I grab my keys and phone, slamming the door closed as I dash to the front door. Fumbling, I somehow manage to put my cell and keys into my pocket while swiping my key card. The red light turned to green and I sighed. ‘Too many red lights for my taste,’ I run through the hallway, yelling and catching glances. “Sara!Has anyone seen Sara?!” Panting, I skid into the lab, just as Archie was heading out. “Archie, have you seen Sara?” My eyes stay wide, staring at him as he looks me over.
“Gris, you o-”
“Where is she, Archie? ”
“Well, I did see her in the break room, she wasn’t looking too good. I think she was drinking.” My breath catches in my throat, stopping everything around me. My head swims through the times I saw her drinking, trying to stop her. Especially after I turned her down. Why oh why did I do that? Men make mistakes when they’re in love. ‘I love her. I love Sara Sidle.’ Reeling backwards, I run back out of the lab with Archie calling behind me, “You’re welcome?”
The offices and departments blur by as I run towards the break room, ignoring everyone and everything that’s in between me and Sara. Skidding to a halt, I enter the break room, and at the table, Sara sat slumped over in her chair. Sinking to one knee next to her, I gently lift up her head and look into her beautiful eyes. Something was wrong. They were blurred, dilated, and she was cold and pale. “Sara! Sara, what’s wrong?! Why are you sorry?!” I looked around the room, my widened blue eyes resting on a large bottle of champagne...empty on the table in front of her. My eyes widened even farther in sorrow and fear, heart breaking in two.
“Sara, what did you do?! Sara, what did you do to yourself?! ” My voice was soft, small, fearful, and it didn’t sound right. I was the no-emotions man. If I broke down, than how would everyone else manage? But it was true. I felt so small in that room, in the position, fearful of what Sara could actually do to herself. “I need the truth.” I pressed, her soft skin against my hands, her eyes dull and just staring back, a tear or two slipping from her eyes. Standing up quickly, I lifted her up bridal style and turned to lay her on the floor, to relax her from whatever happened, when...click Something fell on the floor, and when I looked, I sat her down in horror and stared at the object. An empty prescription bottle, a bright, neon red sticker reading plainly, ‘WARNING! Do not take with alcohol!' I collapse from my squatting position to my knees on the floor, suddenly realizing what she’s doing, too late.
“Sara, why?! Oh Sara! I’m sorry. I’m sorry I turned you down when I loved you. Still love you. I’ve watched you everyday, so worried about what your next move will take you. And this is what I get! I deserve it, but I truly, passionately love you. I just wanted so much more for you, more than what I could give you. Children, a family, someone your age, a man who you’ll look at more than a husband and a man you want to spend your life with than your boss and mentor.” Slipping my arm underneath her neck and knees, I somehow managed to get her laid across my lap, the one arm still supporting her neck. “I love you, Sara. Please don’t do this too me.” Tears pricked my eyes, but they didn’t come. Taking a finger, I gently trailed it across her jawline, flawed but still beautiful, and pushed a strand of her bright brown hair out of her eyes.
Steps entered the break room behind me, a gasp, followed by the crashing of glass on the tile floor. A body fell to their knees next to me, but I was too distracted to even care who it was, even if it was Ecklie. “S-s-s-sara?! Grissom, what’s wrong with her?!” I lifted my eyes to find Nick, gazing worriedly into Sara’s distancing face. I gulped down the tears threatening to fall before speaking, wanting so badly to go back to three years ago and say yes, yes I’d go out with her. I’d treat her so well, try to comfort and appreciate her.
“Nick, I-I need you to call an ambulance!” My voice was still small, gazing at Sara, her hands limply wrapped around my neck. There was no movement next to me, and I glared up at Nick, still staring at her. “Nick, NOW!!” My voice ripped to full fury, ripping with fear at the end. Startling him, Nick leaped up in one bound and dashed out of the room. I lifted her head and let it rest in the crook of my neck, embracing her with my arms, wishing this could have happened in a different set of events. “Sara, I’ve always loved you, since the first time I saw you.”
Choking, she lifted her head and I kissed her on the forehead, wishing it wouldn’t be the last time I could hold her. “I know,” she whispered as her eyes met mine. “I’m just sorry now that you love me. Make it stop, Gil. Don’t leave me.” Kissing her on the cheek, a single tear slipped from my eye and down my cheek as I clutched her closer.
“Don’t worry, I’ll never leave you.”
Chapter One:Sara
'I can't do this, no, not anymore.' I swallowed another three pills with a large swig of the champagne. Shaking my head in disbelief, the last four pills flew into my mouth, mixing with the champagne on my tongue as I drank down the last of the licquor, the last of the pills going with it. I gripped the empty pill bottle in my hand, the other grasping my stomach. The nasuea was horrible and the room was spinning, my mind going blank. "I don't want to die," I groan, my forehead resting on the cool table. 'But he drove me to it. Ripped my heart out again and again, breaking it every single day to pieces. All I wanted was comfort when he hurts me as much as my past does. Gil Grissom drove me to suicide.'
It hurt, not the pills and champagne mixing(although it did), but my heart. I still love him, after all I went through. I love him, and yet he loves no one. He has no emotion, none at all. How could a man of no emotions help me? Will he miss me? Will he cry, tortured like I was? Maybe this'll show him what kind of hell he's put me through. Maybe he'll run to Sofia, little Sofia and she'll comfort him. He wasn't there for me. No one was. No one will miss me. They'll remember, but no one will miss. I'm no one. No one at all. In fact Archie just walked by, looked at me, and walked past. How typical.
The annoying chirping of my cell pulled me from my thoughts. 'Damn, I knew I forgot to do something. Who wants invisible Sara Sidle?' I turn my phone over and my breath catches in my throat. 'Gil Grissom' it read, so I open it, realizing that I was supposed to be at a scene. "Sidle."
"Sara! Where are you? Are you all right?!" His voice, sweet as nectar, was...worried? Worried for me? He doesn't care, just about the scene, I'm late. "Sara!" Or maybe not...
"Wha-? Yeah, yeah I'm fine, Grissom. I'm sorry, I lost track of time. I'll be there in a little bit." My voice, it's...different. It's taking hold of me.
"Sara..." He's concerned, maybe...maybe he does love me. Maybe he does feel. The tears, they're falling down my cheeks. I don't want to die, I love him and he might love me. I want to live. But there's nothing I can do except let my world fall around me. Sobs wrack my chest, breathing uneven.
"Sara...Sara, are you crying?" His voice was soft, comforting. I want this to stop. I'm so confused, and dizzy.
"I'm sorry, Gil." I sobbed, unable to control myself. "I'm so, so sorry." I started crying louder, thank God the door of the break room was closed. 'I'm sorry I didn't hold, convince you that you love me. I'm sorry I'm dying, because of you.'
"Sara, what are you sorry about?!" As if he read my mind. I just kept sobbing, holding the table. My throat was dry, my voice inaudible. No one would hear a cry for help. All I could do was cry.
"I'm so sorry, I'm sorry." I sobbed, regretting the fact I brought pills everywhere, and sorry that I brought a bottle of champagne in today, incredibly sorry that I believed that Grissom really didn't feel for me.
"Sara, Sara, I need you to calm down for me. I'll be back to the lab in ten minutes, okay? I'm coming, Sara." Over on his end, I heard a truck start and the sound of someone running. I couldn't let him find me. It would destroy me, him, us. I sobbed, I didn't want to die, and not in his arms.
"No, Gil, don't. I'm fine. I'll be okay." That's a lie, a huge one. I'm dying at the break room table, and I don't want too, yet I'll be okay?
"Sara, I'm coming." The call terminated, and somehow, I close the phone, dropping it on the table. I need help...now. I stand, miraculously walking to the end of the table before collapsing into the chair there. Everything's spinning, and I'm loosing my grip. I had to face him, my boss, my love. I let my aching head to fall to the cool table top again, my hand still clutching the empty pill bottle.
Yelling, somewhere. Farther away, in the front of the labs, was yelling. Only one voice though. "Sara! Has anyone seen Sara?!" Running, padded footsteps reaching the break room. Someone's next to me, lifting my face with their hands, warm and comforting. Grissom. Hope flooded me, with desperation and sorrow, lots and lost of sorrow. Pain wracked his face as he looked me over. "Sara!" he whispered, his voice cracking. "Sara, what's wrong?! Why are you sorry?!" His eyes left mine, searching the room for only for a moment though, before his body went rigid and turned back to me.
"Sara, what did you do? Sara, what did you do to yourself?!" The tears were spilling again as I silently tried to tell him, 'I overdosed, I'm dying, and I don't want to I love you, and you can save me.' "I need the truth." His bright blue eyes, so handsome, were glassed and lost, afraid as his thumbs traced my cheeks, so comforting. He moved, and I didn't want him to leave me, but then I was spinning faster, for real. I felt protected, safe in Gil's arms, and I couldn't feel my hands or feet anymore, and I heard the pill bottle hit the floor. He laid me down on the floor, and turned back with the bottle in his hands. His eyes threatened to overflow as they widened, his hands dropping the pills and looking to the champagne, then to me. The tears keep coming, I can't stop, I don't want to leave yet, not yet. His arms slid under me and pulled me to him, his hand supporting my neck.
"Sara, why?! Oh, Sara! I'm sorry. I'm sorry I turned you down when I loved you. Still love you! I've watched you everyday, so worried where your next move might take you. And this is what I get! I deserve it, but I truly, passionately love you. I-I just wanted so much more for you, more than what I could give you. Children, a family, someone your age, a man who you would see more as a husband, a man you want to spend the rest of your life with than a boss and mentor." He stopped for a minute, chest heaving heavily as I tried to absorb thrown at me through my grogginess. He loves me, he truly does, and this is what I give out. "I love you, Sara. Please, please don't do this to me."
My tears still fall down my cheeks, a meek smile on my face as his right ring finger traced my jawline, pushing away hair and tears. Someone walked in behind him, but he was blocking them. I gingerly, limply wrapped my arms around Gil's neck as a glass broke, Nick falling next to Grissom on his knees.
"S-s-s-sara?! Grissom, what's wrong with her?!" Nick's eyes were wide with concern. I could hardly feel anything now, besides Grissom. He swallowed quickly, gulping before turning to Nick.
"Nick, I-I need you to call an ambulance!" Nick's eyes connected with mine, as I tried to plead for the call. But Grissom's voice sprang to life, echoing in the room. "Nick, NOW!!" He jumped in one leap, speeding out of the break room into the opposite office, quickly picking up the phone, his mouth moving quickly as he kept glancing back and Grissom and me. His gentle hands holding me close to his chest, his sweet, delicious cologne(never knew he wore that...) wafting into my nose, but that too was slipping from me.
"Sara, I've always loved you, since the first time I saw you." The dryness in my throat burned, unbearable as I started wheezing, my pulse weakening yet. His lips met my clammy forehead, my eyes trailing to his as he reluctantly pulled away. How could he not be crying? Grissom, you'll never cease to amaze me, and that's one reason why I love you. I continue coughing before I whisper.
"I know. I'm just sorry now that you love me." And it was true. I was killing him with me, taking his love away. "Make it stop, Gil. Don't leave me." It was spinning again when I felt him lift me closer to him than before, when I felt him kiss my cheek tenderly, and his...moist? cheek on mine. He was crying. Gil Grissom had broken down. For me. Insignificant Sara Sidle.
"Don't worry," he whispered in my ear, sirens approaching in the background, his voice cracking with fear.
"I'll never leave you..."
Chapter Two:Grissom
She wasn't moving, at all. The only thing that told me she was alive was her shallow breathing. I was crying, the tears drenching me cheeks as my hand cradeled her head, fingers running through her hair. I was the one at fault, guilty of killing her. My other hand shakily reaches out for her wrist, grasping it for a pulse. "You shouldn't be sorry, I'm the one who should be apologizing. I'm sorry, please don't do this. Hang on, Sara. I know you can!"
There was noise all around me. The door of the break room pushes open, two men giving orders to each other as there's clicks of locks. One man, caucasian, thirty something, smoothed black hair bent down to me, wearing an EMS uniform. "Sir, I need to put Ms. Sidle on the gurney. You can come in the ambulance." My blue eys dried somewhat, hope coming back, but still glassy. I stood up, still holding Sara, my beautiful Sara, and gently laid her on the gurney. Her eyes are glazed, but her hands defiantly stay wrapped around my neck. Kissing her cheek, I gingerly pry her fingers away as the paramedics strap her down.
"I'm not leaving you, I promised. Not now, not ever." The scene's surreal, as if in slow motion right out of a movie. Standing at the door is Jim, Nick, and Warrick, all solemn. All sporting sorrow in their eyes. But they don't know the pain I'm feeling, the regret and guilt I feel. I just glance at them, tears running down my face, before dashing after the paramedics out the back of the labs. The bright sun is blinding, and I'm thankful for the shade of the ambulance as I jump in, doors slammed behind me. But none of that matters, because as every second goes by, I see Sara's pulse grow weaker on the screen.
The sirens wail as the ambulance jerks forward, speeding out of the parking lot and onto the road. Instantly grabbing her hand, I bend my face down to her's, her eyes growing distant and cold. The paramedics are calling readings to the driver, calling them into the hospital. Her soft hair runs through my fingers as I gently caress her face. The beeping keeps slowing, yet Sara is alive, still. And hopefully will for a long time.
"Gil, I-"
"Shhhhhhhh. Rest, Sara. You'll be fine. I love you, too. I won't let anything happen to you." A meek smile spreads across her face, eyes drooping shut in weakness as I feel a small smile spread across my face too. But it's short lived. Another sound, so heart-wrenching and stomach dropping screams out through the ambulance.
The pulse flatlines.
Chapter Three:Grissom
"SARA! SARA, NO!!!" No, she can't die No, she's not going to I promised her I lean over her, my lips touching her's, as if a single kiss could bring her back.
"John! Stop the ambulance! I need you to resusitate!" Two hands grabbed my shoulders, pulling me away from her into the back corner of the ambulance. The heart-wrenching, never ending squeel of the machine still echoes out over the calls of the paramedic.
"Charging...Clear!" My eyes widen in horror, even farther as tears leak, as her body jumps a little, the straps pulling her back onto the gurney.
"SARA!!"
"George, grab the seditives! He's going ballistic!"
"Charging up to 260 now. Clear!" Her body jumps again, the pulse does not. I'm sobbing shaking in the younger man's arms as the third paramedic's trying to find a needle for the seditives. But I can't leave Sara.
"Sara, I know you can pull through! Sara, I love you! Don't do this to me!!!" I'm struggling against his push against the wall, trying to see around his head.
"Charging to 380. Clear!"
"Other cabinet, George!! The needles are in the OTHER cabinet!"
"SARA!!!!"
"Recharging, clear!!" Her body jumps again and my eyes dance horribly between the screen, that horrid screen, and her beautiful face. And that evil screech is louder than ever. The paramedic with the irons just stands loosely, gazing upon her body.
"No, SARA!!" Pushing the paramedic away, finally, I crawl to her side, her motionless side, throwing myself over her. Her hands, cold, eyes closed and unfluttering, limp. "No, no, no, NO, she's not gone!"
Once again, my lips fall upon her's as I hear in the background, "Dan! Toss the seditives! I got the syringe!" I pull back, not wanting to let go, and feel a painful stinging in my neck and fall to the floor in a faint.
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Seconds later, baffling the paramedics as Grissom lies unconscious on the floor of the ambulance,the pulseometer jumps from it's evil squeel to a slow, steady beating.
Chapter Four:Grissom
The smell, that's what hits me first. My head is throbbing, and my neck feels inflamed on the right side. My blue eyes flutter, and everything rushes back.
Overdose.
Seditives.
Resusitacion.
Flatlined Pulses.
Ambulances.
Sara.
My beautiful Sara. I sit up quickly, instantly sorry for that. The room spins unevenly as I determinely swing my legs over the bed. The bed? The white walls, disinfectant smell, iron barred beds. I'm in the hospital. My hand instinctively goes to my head, a large bump over the entire back of my head. I groan, and a nurse comes around.
"Ah, Mr. Grissom, you've awoken. You're free to go as soon as you're ready."
"How long has it been?"
"Ummm," checking down to her wrist, the young brunette shakes back the scrubs and looks back at him. "It's been two and a half hours since admittance." 'At least two and a half hours she's been dead. I'm at fault, I killed her. I promised I'd never leave, protect her, and look what that did.' "Mr. Grissom, are you okay?" The nurse pulled closer, eyeing me as I teared, tears falling down my face. My eyes shut defiantly, shaking my head back and forth.
"No." My voice cracks as I turn, looking around the room. My utility belt lays on the chair next to me, the gun fully loaded in the holster still. Not even stalling, watching the nurse hurry quickly out of the room, back to the nurses' station most likely, I grab the gun. Its smooth, gentle appearance puts a smile on my face. I can finally be back with Sara, and truly stay with her forever. The holster unbuckles and I pull the gun up to my eyes, looking it over. Jim insisted I kept it, just for emergencies. Does this qualify, Jim? Losing your most loved possesion, not even a possesion, a love, and feeling at fault? Feeling guilty for her death and now you can't live without her? Well, who gives a damn what he thinks, I can't go on like this. Tormented and cruelly tortured as I continue on, her lifeless body in the ground.
The barrel feels so comforting, against my temple. The nurse runs back in with Security guys and screams, followed by a second scream, Catherine. "GRISSOM!!! What do you think you're doing?!"
I shake my head, cocking the gun. "I loved her, more than anyone could possibly understand or know, even her. Now I'm at fault for her death, and I can't live without her or the guilt. I'm sorry, Cath." My finger tenses as I'm about to pull the trigger when realization crosses her tormented face.
"Is this about Sara?!"
"Who else could I be talking about? Now, please let me finish thi-"
"She's alive!"
"What do you mean? I watched her die in front of me! I held her cold, limp body in my arms! I watched her die because I killed her inside, time and time again! How could she possibly be ALIVE??!!" I was furiated, tears rappidly streaking my cheeks as I stared Catherine down. How stupid does she think I am? I watched the love of my life die in front of me and she's trying to tell me she's alive??!
"Sara! She came back after they knocked you out!! Grissom, Sara's ALIVE!!" The gun fell from my hands onto the tile floor and just in time, I grabbed the iron sides of the bed, cold and slippery on my clammy hands, as my knees buckled from beneath me.
"She...she's alive? Oh my..she's alive." My hands cover my face, torn in confusion, love, sorrow, and hope as I lay on my back, too fatigued and dizzy, tormented, to get up. "She's...alive," was all I could whisper between sobs as Catherine sat me up and wrapped her arms around me, embracing me.
Chapter Five:Grissom
"Shhhhhh, Gris, it's okay. She's alive. She's just asleep right now. It's alright."
"No, it's not alright You have no idea what I've just been through. The phone call she answered and I felt pure terror. When I found her, sorrow, burning pain, fear ripped through me. In the ambulance I went from hopeful to shocked, from torn to heartbroken beyond belief. Add the knowledge that I forced this upon her with all I've done, and I'm just a broken, confused, and lost wreck." Catherine just looked at me before gently rubbing her hands down my back, trying to soothe me. It wasn't working. "Where is she? Where's Sara? I need to see her."
"Sir, Mr. Grissom, we should take you down to the ward, just for a check up..." One of the Security guys stepped forward, young and forceful, nodding his head.
"No! I'm not going to the psych ward on a gurney, I'm walking there to see Sara." Shakily standing, my head felt on fire, the familiar sensation of everything collapsing around me flooding my head as I staggered forward, the Security detail holding their guns out toward me.
"Mr. Grissom, it's standard procedure when someone attempts suicide, even on false belief, on hospital property, they must be taken to the psych ward. Now, we can take you gently, or you we can forcibly take you." I shake my head, but Catherine’s grip tightens as I try to step forward.
“Gil, calm down. They just want to make sure you’re okay...”
“Make sure I’m okay? Make sure I’m OKAY? Of course I’m not okay! Did you not just listen to me?! I thought I lost her, the sunshine of my life, the point of my living! I wouldn’t have been able to live without her, I just wouldn’t have been able to pass the buck of her death to anyone but myself.” My head hangs low, and my eyes catch Catherine motioning them back.
“He’s just had a long day, traumatic event. They were very, very close. He’s not suicidal. If Gilbert Grissom was determined for death, he’d be long gone.” Her arm wrapped around my shoulders, but it wasn’t the same. I needed Sara. She was my life, my oxygen to breathe. Without her, I’d be dead. If it wasn’t for Catherine, I would be dead. Laying on the cold tile floor. While Sara was still alive. I shudder, and continue to walk forward, staring at the ground as we enter the wing where Sara’s being kept and into the waiting room. Everyone’s there. Nick, Warrick, Al, Jim, Greg, Archie, Hodges, even Ecklie? But there my boss sat, solemn with everyone else, but there was an evil glitch in his eyes. Or was it just my mind playing tricks on me. It wouldn’t be the first time... The first one to rise was Jim, walking slowly over to me. Our eyes meet, both swelling with tears. My hand extends forward, but I’m pulled slowly into a hug, a strong, supporting hug.
Then came Nick, and Warrick, one by one they all came forward, arms around me, trying to soothe what could only be soothed by Sara. Even Greg, the jokester he is, was crying and threw his arms around me. For a while we stood there, as I, Gil Grissom, the one falling apart, was trying to comfort him. “Will she be okay?” he whispered, and that’s when I pulled away. I couldn’t take it anymore. Slowly, full of melancholy I walked to the most uninhabited part of the waiting room, burrying my face into my hands. Even Ecklie, prick that he is, came over and patted me on the back.
“It’s alright, Gil. She was destined to try anyway.” I stopped, dead in thought, and gazed up at him, his evil maniacal face twisted into a grin.
“What did you say?” My voice was quiet, full of anger, and the whole room stopped, the team’s eyes upon the two of us.
“I said, Sara was going to kill herself anyway. She’s a waste, Grissom. Just an emotional psychopath.” I stood quickly and walked toward him, Ecklie backing off a little.
“Grissom...” Nick’s voice rumbled as I stalked Ecklie, farther across the room. My fist flew, full into the nose, sending him crumbling on the floor.
“Don’t you EVER talk about her like that again!! EVER!!” My knuckles throbbed, nothing compared to my head though. I turn, walking back to my seat to return to mourning her dangling life.
“GRISSOM!” Archie's yell rings out in the room and I turn, and cold spreads from my stomach. Ecklie’s evil grin stares me in the face as I look down, a knife fully imbedded into my abdomen. “Payback’s a bitch, ain’t she, Gil?” I sway, everything going black and fall into Warrick’s arms as I see Nick and Jim launch on Ecklie before everything tumbles into darkness and cold, and unfeeling. Just like death.
“A Doctor!! We need a doctor, NOW!!!”
Chapter Six: POV 3rd Person
It was chaos, mass chaos in the waiting room at Desert Palms Hospital. Conrad Ecklie fenced off Nick and Jim with a knife, as they counter acted with their guns. Greg ran forward and out of the room, screaming down the hallway for Security and doctors. Catherine and Warrick gazed over Grissom, eyes fluttering, a crimson tide flowing from his stomach onto the mint green carpet. Ripping the cotton button up jacket from herself, Catherine wrapped the white cloth around Grissom's stab, wide and deep across the front, as Warrick supported his head.
Al Robbins ambled toward Grissom and put pressure on the wound, ordering one of them to perform CPR after finding Gil's weak, decreasing pulse. Catherine looked to Warrick, the man's eyes wide. "I don't know how!" he exclaimed, as Catherine lowered her lips to Grissom's, moving her blonde, lengthy hair out of the way.
A shot rang out in the air, Jim standing over a falling Ecklie, a bullet in his heart as blood spilled from a slice in the officer’s arm. A wave of doctors, nurses, and Security men filled the room, Greg leading the way and kneeling at his boss' side. Four Security men stood dumbfounded, gazing at the dying body of the man they had tried to take to the psych ward not even fifteen minutes earlier. Catherine, Warrick, and Al were all pushed back by doctors, yelling out orders to the nurses running in and out of the room. A bed was wheeled in, and with the utmost care, Grissom’s unconscious body was loaded onto the bed as the doctors shouted to head to the ER.
Security ushered the remnants of the LVPD crime lab team out of the murder scene and called in the police, requesting a nearby forensics team since the actual team was the crime itself. They stood there, dumbfounded. All in an instant, Sara was overdosed, Grissom barely hanging onto life, not even sure if he’ll make it, and Ecklie lay dead in the waiting room. Catherine broke down first, sobbing into Warrick’s shoulder as he smoothed her hair, everyone standing next to the room. Al looked down at his clothes, covered with blood and a doctor ushered Jim to the ER for stitching of the slice to the bone. In an instant, the whole family was falling apart.
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“Put the mask on him, serious bleeding and organ damage. Extensive surgery, and be gentle, he...he might not make it through. This isn’t the average citizen, so let’s give it all we got, for Miss Sidle’s sake.” The worried expressions upon their faces, young and old, reflected the grave face Sara Sidle displayed in her bed.
“Where’s Grissom? I want him now! Where’s the team?!” She was tired, exhausted, and weak. The nurse just shook her head, in the know about the situation down the hall.
“You can’t see them right now. There’s been...an accident.”
“What?! What do you mean an accident? ” Her face was frightened, even paler than when she died, knuckles almost transparent from clutching the blanket over her legs. No, if something happened to Grissom, or Cath, or Nicky, or Greg, any of them, her miraculous revival was worth nothing.
“I’m not at liberty to discuss that Miss Sidle. Now please, you need rest.” She nodded curtly and exited, leaving Sara in the dark room alone. She rolled onto her side, gazing out the window onto Las Vegas, the slim streaks of dawn just peaking over the horizon, illuminating silent tears racing down her cheeks.
