Need4Speed
Coroner
HAHAHA!!!!! OMFG!!!!!! I LOVE IT!!!!!!!
CSI:MIAMI - The Rebel side- Comedy skits
- Thread starter MacsLovlyAngl
- Start date
MacsLovlyAngl
Head of the Graveyard Shift
After Nick and Warrick helped Greg get the cows back into the yard, they headed to the barn to see how the rest of the team was doing pulling the thorns from Catherine and Calleigh's ass. :lol: :lol:
"How's it going, with the thorns", asked Nick
"How the fug you think it's going, you god damn chicken fugger". *oww*, *oww*.
"Fug sakes Grissom., this isn't supposed to be a scene from S&M, keep your hands above the waist", said Catherine.
"Listen Catherine, in about 5 seconds I'm gonna shove them thorns all the way in", just shut your dirty mouth for five minutes or I'll stuff a bug in it". :devil:
"
Calleigh stop wiggling damn it, said Mac and "H", just hold the fug still only about 50 more to go", said Mac.
"50 *oww*, your fuggin *oww* kiddin right"? "Come on "H", you sick freakin weirdo, I swear you're enjoying this", just fuggin pull them fast". :devil:
Once they had all the thorns removed, Greg brought out some cream.
"Who's gonna rub my ass"? said Calleigh. :devil:
"I'll do it calleigh", said Greg. :devil:
"There you go Greg, you get to touch a real woman, instead of your left palm". :lol: :lol:
"Fug you Nick, you motha luvin, chicken fugger".
"Does everyone know about my fuggin drunk night, in the chicken house"?
everyone started to laugh. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
"Yeah, Nicky baby, we all know". :lol:
Everyone settled down for the night, "H" was beside Mac, who was beside Grissom, who was beside Warrick, who was beside Nick, who was beside Danny, who was holding hands beside Flack, who was sleeping beside Sara, who was sleeping beside Catherine, who was sleeping beside Calleigh, who was sleeping beside Stella, who was sleeping beside Eric, who was sleeping beside Ryan.
Later that night, "H" felt someone licking his ear, "Stop that Calleigh, said "H", you know that fuggin aggrivates me". :devil:
"What the fug you talkin bout "H", Calleigh is down beside Stella", said Warrick.
"AUhhhhhhh!!!! You motha fuggin cow, eewww gross",get the fug away from me".
"H" jumped up and moved himself down the line beside Stella. :devil:
"Watch your hands "H"man, said Stella. *giggle* :lol: :lol: :devil:
All of a sudden *SLAM*, the barn door flew open.
"You motha fugger's get up now", said Stetler with Ecklie beside him.
Everyone took one look at them and started cracking up. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
"What the hell Stetler, you lost your fuggin dress, and your thong is full of stains".
"One more word Eric and I'll stuff a mudhole up your ass".
"Ecklie looked pissed and just as he was about to say something, a dog walked up and snorted his ass and started to hump his leg. :devil:
"Looks like you have a new lover Ecklie", said Warrick. :devil:
"Piss you Warrick, Ecklie is mine", said Stetler.
"Wow, said Greg he must really like you Ecklie, he's just a humping you" :lol: :lol: :devil: :devil:
Ecklie was having a hell of a time trying to get the dog off his leg, and as Stetler tried to help him, the CSI's snuck away. :lol: :lol: :lol:
TBC
"How's it going, with the thorns", asked Nick
"How the fug you think it's going, you god damn chicken fugger". *oww*, *oww*.
"Fug sakes Grissom., this isn't supposed to be a scene from S&M, keep your hands above the waist", said Catherine.
"Listen Catherine, in about 5 seconds I'm gonna shove them thorns all the way in", just shut your dirty mouth for five minutes or I'll stuff a bug in it".
:devil:"
Calleigh stop wiggling damn it, said Mac and "H", just hold the fug still only about 50 more to go", said Mac.
"50 *oww*, your fuggin *oww* kiddin right"? "Come on "H", you sick freakin weirdo, I swear you're enjoying this", just fuggin pull them fast". :devil:
Once they had all the thorns removed, Greg brought out some cream.
"Who's gonna rub my ass"? said Calleigh. :devil:
"I'll do it calleigh", said Greg.
:devil:"There you go Greg, you get to touch a real woman, instead of your left palm". :lol: :lol:
"Fug you Nick, you motha luvin, chicken fugger".
"Does everyone know about my fuggin drunk night, in the chicken house"?
everyone started to laugh. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
"Yeah, Nicky baby, we all know". :lol:
Everyone settled down for the night, "H" was beside Mac, who was beside Grissom, who was beside Warrick, who was beside Nick, who was beside Danny, who was holding hands beside Flack, who was sleeping beside Sara, who was sleeping beside Catherine, who was sleeping beside Calleigh, who was sleeping beside Stella, who was sleeping beside Eric, who was sleeping beside Ryan.
Later that night, "H" felt someone licking his ear, "Stop that Calleigh, said "H", you know that fuggin aggrivates me".
:devil:"What the fug you talkin bout "H", Calleigh is down beside Stella", said Warrick.
"AUhhhhhhh!!!! You motha fuggin cow, eewww gross",get the fug away from me".
"H" jumped up and moved himself down the line beside Stella.
:devil:"Watch your hands "H"man, said Stella. *giggle* :lol: :lol: :devil:
All of a sudden *SLAM*, the barn door flew open.
"You motha fugger's get up now", said Stetler with Ecklie beside him.
Everyone took one look at them and started cracking up. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
"What the hell Stetler, you lost your fuggin dress, and your thong is full of stains".
"One more word Eric and I'll stuff a mudhole up your ass".
"Ecklie looked pissed and just as he was about to say something, a dog walked up and snorted his ass and started to hump his leg.
:devil: "Looks like you have a new lover Ecklie", said Warrick. :devil:
"Piss you Warrick, Ecklie is mine", said Stetler.
"Wow, said Greg he must really like you Ecklie, he's just a humping you" :lol: :lol: :devil: :devil:
Ecklie was having a hell of a time trying to get the dog off his leg, and as Stetler tried to help him, the CSI's snuck away.
:lol: :lol: :lol:TBC
Need4Speed
Coroner
HAHA!!!! this is freaking awesome!!!!!!! i love it!!! this is one of the best fan fics i've ever read!!!!!! haha!!!! and guys please check out my fanfic...i seriously want some opinions on it. it's called "a love like no other -a Speed love story"
MacsGirlMel
Mac's Personal Assistant
ROFL....and ouch too. This is great
MacsLovlyAngl
Head of the Graveyard Shift
"How the hell we gonna get outta here"? asked Warrick. "We have no fuggin car".
Just at that second Greg pulled up with his Papa's pick up.
"Come on guy's let's go", said Greg. :lol:
Everyone hopped into the truck, as Greg sped away.
"Where the hell to guy's"? asked Greg.
"Anywhere but here", said Mac and "H" together.
Just as they thought they had gotten far enough away, Ecklie and Stetler were right behind them.
"Shit", said Warrick, "here come's the fuggin pansy patrol, hit it Grego" :lol:
"Hit what Warrick,the truck is older then your Mama", said Greg.
"What"! you not makin fun of my mama, are you Greg"?
At that moment Ecklie smacked into the truck.
"Yee haw", yelled Catherine this is like being in the Dukes of Hazzard and being chased by Rosco.P.Cotrain and Enis". :lol: :lol:
"Oh yeah! said Calleigh, I'm Daisy, and Warrick can be my man ,and Eric can be Cooter, and Grissom is the oldest so he can be Uncle Jessie, Ryan and Flack can be BO and Luke Duke". :lol: :lol:
"Fug you Calleigh, you short ass country bumpkin". "I didn't hear you complaining about "H"s age last week".
"Ooooh!! said everyone. :devil: :devil:
""H" and Calleigh, humping in a tree, just the Gorilla's and the Monkey's, teased Grissom.
"Fug you Grussom". "At least my Mama isn't fat and ugly".
"WHAT", your Mama, so fat she broke her leg and gravy fell out. said Grissom. :lol: :lol: :lol:
"Oh yeah! said calleigh, Yo mama so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning. :lol: :lol:
"Fug you Calleigh", and you Sara with your laughing, you sad excuse poster girl for Bones -R- Us stores.
"SMASH< SMASH<SMASH
"Back of Ecklie you dog humping motha fugger", yelled Grego.
At that moment a huge truck was coming down the road,
"Holy Mother of God"! said Mac, "Swerve Greg, swerve".
As they swerved and missed the truck, Ecklie and Stetler, didn't have enough time and had no choice but to move off the road and down back into the swamp. :lol: :lol:
As the CSI's started laughing, they missed the turn off and down they went into the swamp a few feet from Ecklie and Stetler.
"Nice work Grego, said Warrick.
"Fug you Warrick", you worthless excuse of a CSI.
From down the swamp they could here Ecklie calling, "Get the hell over here and help us out, you worthless bunch of .......
Knowing they had no choice, they walked over and helped the two pansy's out of the swamp. :lol: :lol:
"Now that we're all stuck out here together, does anyone have any matches"? asked Nick.
"Fug You Nick", your a Boy Scout make us a fire", said Warrick.
"Auh come on, Why not get "H" to make it , he;s the dinasaur of the group".
"Listen you mother as fuggin excuse for a bulls ass, your Grissom is the dinasaur, one more word about my age and you'll be pushing up fuggin daisy's". Understand, as he put on his sunnies he said it again, "Understand".
"Why the hell does he say everything twice asked Greg and why wear shades at night"?
"DON'T ASK"!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yelled everyone.
"well son, I'll tell you only once so listen, so listen", "IT's INCASE YOU DON'T HEAR ME THE FIRST TIME". yelled "H", now back off, young'en before I shove my $350 dollar sunnies up you ass".
TBC
Just at that second Greg pulled up with his Papa's pick up.
"Come on guy's let's go", said Greg. :lol:
Everyone hopped into the truck, as Greg sped away.
"Where the hell to guy's"? asked Greg.
"Anywhere but here", said Mac and "H" together.
Just as they thought they had gotten far enough away, Ecklie and Stetler were right behind them.
"Shit", said Warrick, "here come's the fuggin pansy patrol, hit it Grego"
:lol:"Hit what Warrick,the truck is older then your Mama", said Greg.
"What"! you not makin fun of my mama, are you Greg"?
At that moment Ecklie smacked into the truck.
"Yee haw", yelled Catherine this is like being in the Dukes of Hazzard and being chased by Rosco.P.Cotrain and Enis". :lol: :lol:
"Oh yeah! said Calleigh, I'm Daisy, and Warrick can be my man ,and Eric can be Cooter, and Grissom is the oldest so he can be Uncle Jessie, Ryan and Flack can be BO and Luke Duke". :lol: :lol:
"Fug you Calleigh, you short ass country bumpkin". "I didn't hear you complaining about "H"s age last week".
"Ooooh!! said everyone.
:devil: :devil:""H" and Calleigh, humping in a tree, just the Gorilla's and the Monkey's, teased Grissom.
"Fug you Grussom". "At least my Mama isn't fat and ugly".
"WHAT", your Mama, so fat she broke her leg and gravy fell out. said Grissom.
:lol: :lol: :lol:"Oh yeah! said calleigh, Yo mama so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning. :lol: :lol:
"Fug you Calleigh", and you Sara with your laughing, you sad excuse poster girl for Bones -R- Us stores.
"SMASH< SMASH<SMASH
"Back of Ecklie you dog humping motha fugger", yelled Grego.
At that moment a huge truck was coming down the road,
"Holy Mother of God"! said Mac, "Swerve Greg, swerve".
As they swerved and missed the truck, Ecklie and Stetler, didn't have enough time and had no choice but to move off the road and down back into the swamp.
:lol: :lol:As the CSI's started laughing, they missed the turn off and down they went into the swamp a few feet from Ecklie and Stetler.
"Nice work Grego, said Warrick.
"Fug you Warrick", you worthless excuse of a CSI.
From down the swamp they could here Ecklie calling, "Get the hell over here and help us out, you worthless bunch of .......
Knowing they had no choice, they walked over and helped the two pansy's out of the swamp. :lol: :lol:
"Now that we're all stuck out here together, does anyone have any matches"? asked Nick.
"Fug You Nick", your a Boy Scout make us a fire", said Warrick.
"Auh come on, Why not get "H" to make it , he;s the dinasaur of the group".
"Listen you mother as fuggin excuse for a bulls ass, your Grissom is the dinasaur, one more word about my age and you'll be pushing up fuggin daisy's". Understand, as he put on his sunnies he said it again, "Understand".
"Why the hell does he say everything twice asked Greg and why wear shades at night"?
"DON'T ASK"!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yelled everyone.
"well son, I'll tell you only once so listen, so listen", "IT's INCASE YOU DON'T HEAR ME THE FIRST TIME". yelled "H", now back off, young'en before I shove my $350 dollar sunnies up you ass".
TBC
MacsGirlMel
Mac's Personal Assistant
lol....yeah but H wouldn't, 'cause that'd kill the sunnies and he loves them too much.
*thinks Grissom is the real dinosaur...he's older than H, right?*
*thinks Grissom is the real dinosaur...he's older than H, right?*
Need4Speed
Coroner
HAHA!!!! I love the yo mamma jokes!!!!! LMAO!!!!!!!!
MacsLovlyAngl
Head of the Graveyard Shift
Thanks for all the feedback guy's. I'd like to say it's been great. Due to having a comedy block at this moment, I'm not sure when I'll post again.
Thanks, LMH :lol:
It came back.... :devil:
After they had started the fire, everyone sat huddled together, except for Stetler and Ecklie, who where on the opposite side.
"Hell , I'm starving", said Mac, does anyone have something to eat"?
"Yeah right Mac, we'll just pull it out of our Hanes for you". "God you're dumb". said "H".
"What's that you got Nicky baby"? asked Catherine.
"Notin", Nick said with his mouth full.
"Nicky", what have you got"? "Come on Nicky, you greedy fugger, hand it over".
"I have nothing see"! As he opened his mouth he had stuck the piece of chocolate on the roof of his mouth.
"I smell chocolate"!, said Sara. "Come here Nicky", let's see what's in your fuggin pant's".
Nick got up and started to run, he knew if they caught him he would have to share his pocket full of chocolate caramels.
As he looked behind him he tripped on a piece of branch.
"Fug me"! "Damn that hurt", "Shit, Nick was good and dazed when the teams got there.
Catherine walked up and stuck her hand in Nicky's pants, "Ohhhhh!!! stop that Cat, that is not chocolate".
Laughing Catherine said, "Look caramels".
After she passed them out to everyone , they went back to the fire and found Ecklie and Stetler holding on to each other.
"Christ not again", said Warrick. "This is a No touch Zone" Ecklie, so go play over there".
Greg was watching, he had no idea Ecklie was a Cakeboy.
"Sara, when the hell did this happen"? asked Greg.
Eric inturrupts....
"Hey does anyone have any good jokes or stories"?
"I have a great blonde joke", said Greg. "Okay here goes",
A blonde lady was driving along the highway when a blonde police officer pulled her over for speeding.
Officer: May i see your licence?
Lady: what does it look like?
Officer: its a rectangular thing with a photo of you on it.
The lady looks through her bag and pulls out her compact mirror and hands it to the officer.
The officer opens it up and says 'if you had told me you were a police officer I wouldn't have pulled you over.'
All the guy's started laughing.
"That's a good one Greg, I could so see Calleigh doing that". said Ryan
"Fug you Ryan, Your mama is so fat that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean.....
Everyone howled, out of all the Mama jokes they liked that one.
"Whatever, you blonde bimbo, your Mama is so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.
*hahahahahahahhahahha* giggle*hahahahaha*
"Fug you all, said Calleigh as she walked down to the swamp, picked up a mud ball and threw it down Ryan's pants. "Now you can say, I stuffed a mudball up your fuggin ass Ryan".
"You blonde cow", Ryan put his hands down his pants to grab the mud. As he threw it back at Calleigh, she ducked, and he got "H"s face smacked dab on his sunnies.
"HELL", "HELL"! said "H", "Those are my sunnies"!
"Run Ryan, run little Ryan, run", laughed the team.
Thanks, LMH :lol:
It came back.... :devil:
After they had started the fire, everyone sat huddled together, except for Stetler and Ecklie, who where on the opposite side.
"Hell , I'm starving", said Mac, does anyone have something to eat"?
"Yeah right Mac, we'll just pull it out of our Hanes for you". "God you're dumb". said "H".
"What's that you got Nicky baby"? asked Catherine.
"Notin", Nick said with his mouth full.
"Nicky", what have you got"? "Come on Nicky, you greedy fugger, hand it over".
"I have nothing see"! As he opened his mouth he had stuck the piece of chocolate on the roof of his mouth.
"I smell chocolate"!, said Sara. "Come here Nicky", let's see what's in your fuggin pant's".
Nick got up and started to run, he knew if they caught him he would have to share his pocket full of chocolate caramels.
As he looked behind him he tripped on a piece of branch.
"Fug me"! "Damn that hurt", "Shit, Nick was good and dazed when the teams got there.
Catherine walked up and stuck her hand in Nicky's pants, "Ohhhhh!!! stop that Cat, that is not chocolate".
Laughing Catherine said, "Look caramels".
After she passed them out to everyone , they went back to the fire and found Ecklie and Stetler holding on to each other.
"Christ not again", said Warrick. "This is a No touch Zone" Ecklie, so go play over there".
Greg was watching, he had no idea Ecklie was a Cakeboy.
"Sara, when the hell did this happen"? asked Greg.
Eric inturrupts....
"Hey does anyone have any good jokes or stories"?
"I have a great blonde joke", said Greg. "Okay here goes",
A blonde lady was driving along the highway when a blonde police officer pulled her over for speeding.
Officer: May i see your licence?
Lady: what does it look like?
Officer: its a rectangular thing with a photo of you on it.
The lady looks through her bag and pulls out her compact mirror and hands it to the officer.
The officer opens it up and says 'if you had told me you were a police officer I wouldn't have pulled you over.'
All the guy's started laughing.
"That's a good one Greg, I could so see Calleigh doing that". said Ryan
"Fug you Ryan, Your mama is so fat that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean.....
Everyone howled, out of all the Mama jokes they liked that one.
"Whatever, you blonde bimbo, your Mama is so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.
*hahahahahahahhahahha* giggle*hahahahaha*
"Fug you all, said Calleigh as she walked down to the swamp, picked up a mud ball and threw it down Ryan's pants. "Now you can say, I stuffed a mudball up your fuggin ass Ryan".
"You blonde cow", Ryan put his hands down his pants to grab the mud. As he threw it back at Calleigh, she ducked, and he got "H"s face smacked dab on his sunnies.
"HELL", "HELL"! said "H", "Those are my sunnies"!
"Run Ryan, run little Ryan, run", laughed the team.
Need4Speed
Coroner
HAHA!!!! LMFAO!!! oh and by the way i posted the begining of the sequel to my Speed/Sarah romance story.
MacsGirlMel
Mac's Personal Assistant
LOL he better run fast. I'm also cracking up
MacsLovlyAngl
Head of the Graveyard Shift
This is a new Chapter guy's, just the begining, the story will be posted sometime today
Once morning came everyone was picked up and had to say Good-bye.
"Damn this had to be the coolest time ever, said Mac to Grissom and "H". :lol: :lol:
"That's for sure Mac, that's for sure".
"Keep in touch , who know's maybe we'll meet up again sometime, said Warrick. :devil:
As the teams departed, "H" and his guy's headed back to the Lab.
"Jesus "H", this is damn boring now"! what the fug are we supposed to do now"?
"Well Eric, let's go on vacation". :devil:
"Vacation, to were?, asked Calleigh".
"Well to LV of course,
*key heme song*........
Meanwhile over in NY, Mac had just given his team the news that they needed to go too Vegas and help out with a case. :devil:
"Fuggin A, said Danny, Look out Vegas, here comes the Danman". :lol: :devil:
"You're such a fuggin moron", said Stella.
"Oh my God"! yell Flack, "I just heard from Eric and they are all headed to LV for vacation". "Fuggin A, look at all the fun we will have reeking havic in LV. :lol: :devil: :lol:
"Well then let's go".......
*Key theme song*
Once morning came everyone was picked up and had to say Good-bye.
"Damn this had to be the coolest time ever, said Mac to Grissom and "H". :lol: :lol:
"That's for sure Mac, that's for sure".
"Keep in touch , who know's maybe we'll meet up again sometime, said Warrick. :devil:
As the teams departed, "H" and his guy's headed back to the Lab.
"Jesus "H", this is damn boring now"! what the fug are we supposed to do now"?
"Well Eric, let's go on vacation".
:devil:"Vacation, to were?, asked Calleigh".
"Well to LV of course,
*key heme song*........
Meanwhile over in NY, Mac had just given his team the news that they needed to go too Vegas and help out with a case.
:devil: "Fuggin A, said Danny, Look out Vegas, here comes the Danman". :lol: :devil:
"You're such a fuggin moron", said Stella.
"Oh my God"! yell Flack, "I just heard from Eric and they are all headed to LV for vacation". "Fuggin A, look at all the fun we will have reeking havic in LV. :lol: :devil: :lol:
"Well then let's go".......
*Key theme song*
MacsGirlMel
Mac's Personal Assistant
ooooh nice Can't wait for that part.
Can't wait for that part.