Snicker RP- Open

((Can I play Sara?))

Sara Sidle had just pulled a double-shift yet again that month. She was getting used to the exhaustion that took over, and she was basically running on caffeine.
"Hey Nicky."
She said tiredly as she dragged herself across to a chair and dropped into it. Anytime he was around, she always found she had more strength to get through the next hour.
 
Sara smiled weakly.
"Just getting to the end of another double."
She said on a sigh.
"Brass arrested our murderer so everything's good here. You got a break in your case yet?"
She asked, genuinely interested. She was glad Grissom had kept her off the case Nick had been given - he knew as well as everyone else what domestic voielnce cases did to her. She ended up hanging on by one emotional thread and becoming snappy and tearful whenever anyone said anything she didn't particularly like.
 
"So I look as rough as I feel? Great."
She joked, rolling her eyes and stifling a yawn. Managing to get herself up off the sofa she headed toward the coffee machine. The beloved coffee machine.
"Greg's seriously gotta be more inventive. We're CSIs, does he seriously think that we won't find his coffee behind the plant?"
She laughed, lifting out the packet out from under some fake leaves.
 
"I know."
She smiled over her shoulder at him. Even when he was exhausted, he was still so goddamn hot.
After making them both coffees she went and sat next to him, leaning her head back on the sofa and letting her eyes fall shut lightly. It felt good to just rest her eyes for a moment.
 
For reasons unknown to her, Sara felt a shiver as soon as they made contact. She subconsciously leaned her head against his and sighed.
"Yeah..."
She agreed softly, her eyes open now and carefully focusing on an invisible spot on the ceiling.
"Nick...do you ever think about what would happen if...something happened to you?"
She was in an over-analyze-y mood and it had only been three months since he'd been locked in that box. She'd felt so helpless and terrified seeing him on that cmputer screen. She had fought hard to keep her composure. After they'd found him, the following night when everything had sank in, she had laid in bed and cried. She couldn't imagine ever losing him, and the very knowledge that they'd come so close to that being a reality made her sick. It was then that she'd realized how much she cared for him. She could deny it to everyone else, but she couldn't deny it to herself. Not now. She'd been noticing all the little things - his smile, how his amazing accent became that much more pronounced when he became passionate about something, the way he empathized with victims families' and wore his heart on his sleeve. She always felt her mood pick up a little when he was around, and he always seemed to be able to pull a smile from her, no matter how depressed she felt.
 
"The whole team found you Nick, it wasn't just me..."
She said quietly. To be fair, she had been the one who'd located the right area, but she'd never let herself have that credit. She felt guilty for him being in that box in the first place. There wasn't a reason for her to, but she still did. Guilt wasn't always rational.
She turned her face toward him and blinked back tears.
"I still have nightmares about it. I-I don't know what I'd have done if we hadn't..."
She trailed off, her voice betraying her.
 
"I blame me."
She admitted, tearing her eyes from his and keeping her gaze levelled on anything else. She found it hard to talk about this, and she knew he did too. But she needed him to know how much she cared about him.
 
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