Besides a shot of Flack's toned, white Irish ass as he bends over to tie his shoe, you mean?:drool:
Seriously, though, after the limp debacle that was the majority of S4, anything would be an improvement. Others have covered most of my wish list, but I have one more.
No more new recurring characters. TPTB shouldn't be playing with new dollies until they've adequately dressed and developed the ones they've got. Let's look at the doll hierarchy, shall we?
-Mac: He's the swanky, heirloom dolly, dressed to the nines in his Marines dress uniform, a uniform that comes complete with tiny, spit-polished little shoes and a ceremonial rifle. He gets all the attention and is the star of every scenario, whether it's Fort or Grocery Store, but Mama always keeps him clean because he's a valuable collectible.
-Stella: Stella is the limited-edition Rambo Barbie with kung-fu grip and nad-chopping action. She's pretty and has all the accessories, and Mama wishes you'd leave her in the box, but Stella gets to play fort with the boys. One of her eyes won't close and her dress is dirty from lying in the foxhole, but Stella is one tough dolly. And don't call her "dolly".
-Danny: Danny is the My Buddy Doll. He's rough-and-tumble and can play Fort, but he also likes to be hugged and get picked as the bedtime cuddle buddy. With his fat, Cabbage-Patch arms, he's just begging for a hug. He's been dropped on his head a time or three and chewed on by the dog, but he's always ready for more.
-Flack: Poor Flack. He's the rugged, dependable patchwork teddy you've had since you were three. He's protected you from the bed monster. You've drooled on him and barfed on him, and once you stuffed him into the toilet to see if it would beam him up like the transporter in Star Trek. After a wash, he was good as new. He's the one you want on a sleepover because he's always got your back. He's missing an eye(the cat ate it), and he's dirty, but he still loves you best. Even if you're embarrassed by him because he's a baby toy.
-Lindsay: Lindsay is that ugly, annoying friend of Barbie, Skipper. She tries so hard to be cool but fails miserably. She's the doll only desperate GI Joes want to bang. You'd get rid of her, but she was almost as expensive as Stella, so there she sits, smug in the knowledge of her invulnerability. Like a turd on a hornets' nest.
Hawkes: Hawkes is the naked, bald doll lying on his head in the corner, looking like a pinup for Pederast's Monthly. He was cool for five minutes, until you got him home. Now he sucks, and Mama hardly notices him.
There. Isn't that nice? Everyone in a nutshell. Clearly some of these dolls need love. Like Hawkes. Surely it's not too much to ask to give the doll some clothes and a little dignity before you go tearing off to the toy store for more shiny, trendy, plastic pieces of crap?
