Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY.

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Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

Sorry it took me so long but I was sick (again).Here goes the first one:
To show his love to Danny, Flack bought him a bicycle.So Danny begins riding it just like a little kid.
Danny:Look, Flack, no hands!
Danny:Look, Flack, no feet!
Danny:*crashes into a nearby tree*Look, Flack, no teeth!
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

Peyton "Mac dear, what would you say to a nice cup of tea?"
Mac "Feck off, cup!"

(borrowed yes, but I love the quote!)
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

Flack walks nude into the lab:

Stella: God, Flack! Why are you naked?
Flack: Danny forbid me this morning to wear any fuggly combo. All I has was fuggly, so I just came in Naked.
Stella: Don't you realise everybody is looking at you?
Flack: Actually, they look at me more when I'm dressed.
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

:lol: How would they get any work done? But oh no, don't let him chase any perps! :eek: *is scared*
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

:lol: i think the perps would just stop in shock and stare like:

Perp: Dude.... :eek: it's HUGE!!!!

:lol: :lol: :lol:
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

Mac gets a call one evening but nobody says anything.Fearing the worst, he calls back and a little boy answers the phone whispering:

Boy*whispering*: Hello!

Mac: Did you just call 911?

Boy*whispering*: No!

Mac: OK is your mommy home?

Boy*whispering*: Yes.

Mac: Can I speak to her, please?

Boy*whispering*: No.

Mac: Why not?

Boy*whispering*: Because she's busy!

Mac: Oh, OK. Is your daddy home then?

Boy*whispering*: Yes.

Mac: Can I speak to him?

Boy*whispering*: No!

Mac: Well, for God's sake, why not?

Boy*whispering*: Because he's busy too!

Mac: What the hell is he busy doing?

Boy*whispering*: Talking to the police.

Mac: Oh, so the police are there?

Boy*whispering*: Yes.

Mac: Can I speak to one of them?

Boy*whispering*: No!

Mac: Why not?

Boy*whispering*: Because they are really busy.

Mac: Well, what's your mom busy doing?

Boy*whispering*: Talking to the firemen.

Mac: Can I speak to one of the firemen then?

Boy*whispering*: No!

Mac: *sighs* Why not?

Boy*whispering*: Because they are really busy too!

Mac: Well what the hell are all of these people busy doing?

Boy*whispering*: Looking for me!
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

hey! I've heard of this one! it's in a FHM mag!!! :lol:
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

poison girl said:
Flack walks nude into the lab:

Stella: God, Flack! Why are you naked?
Flack: Danny forbid me this morning to wear any fuggly combo. All I has was fuggly, so I just came in Naked.
Stella: Don't you realise everybody is looking at you?
Flack: Actually, they look at me more when I'm dressed.
Click to expand...
:lol: :lol: OMFG I should *know* better than to eat anything while I read these! Now I have to clean a half choked bowl of cereal off my keyboard GODDAMMIT :lol: :lol:

Peyton "Mac dear, what would you say to a nice cup of tea?"
Mac "Feck off, cup!"
Click to expand...
:lol: borrowed perhaps, but still somehow gets me every time (maybe it just reminds me of a particular welshman I've worked with.)

Perp: Dude.... it's HUGE!!!!
Click to expand...
Is that a nightstick?? ...no, wait, *please,* don't beat me!! :p




Thanks for the laughs (and the mess...) :D
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

an FHM magazine. It's a magazine that they *should* have wherever you are. I have the entire book of FHM bar room jokes and true stories. and the gorilla and the lion is also from there and the parrot swearing as well.
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

Well we don't have such FHM magazines in my f***ing country (Bulgaria) but my quotes were inspired by jokes of an old jokebook!
Alright, you exposed me -- I'm a copycat! :eek:
Oh and what does FHM stand for?
:lol:Hope you don't dig this one up from a "Playboy" magazine or something :lol: :

Mac was sitting quietlyreading his paper one morning, peacefully enjoying himself, when Peyton sneaks up behind him and wacks him on the back of his head with a huge frying pan (lol imagine that :lol:).
Mac:What was that for?
Peyton:What was that piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Marylou written on it?
Mac:Oh honey, remember two weeks ago when I went to the horse races? Marylou was the name of one of the horses I bet on.
Peyton looks all satisfied, apologizes, and goes off to do work around the house.
Three days later Mac is once again sitting in his chair reading and Peyton repeats the frying pan swatting.
Mac:What the hell was that for this time?
Peyton:Your horse phoned.
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

*shrug* beats me! All I know is that it's hilarious! I don't copy the thing cuz most of the jokes are a little off (as in plain dirty) instead I watch a hell load of Jim Carrey movies and try to think something up
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

Let's keep this thread alive:
Little Flackie(I need a little variety):I will not wash my face!
Sid:Oh you are a naughty little boy!When I was a little boy I always washed my face!
Little Flackie:Yeah, and now look at it!

Another joke-inspired one! Most of my quotes are joke-inspired.
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

OMG, these are hilarious. I was trying to think of one, but my mind has gone blank, (probably due to my lack of imagination). Loved the DannyLindsay one with the pinata! :D
 
Re: Quotes you want to, should, or will never hear on CSI NY

Stella: Lindsay, are you going to come to my birthday party?
Lindsay: Of course, I'd never lose it!! Not every year you turn 30!!
Danny: Yes, that's what I said five years ago...
 
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