Since a new chapter is long overdue, here you go
June 15, 2006
Dear Diary,
I don’t know how much longer I can wait.
I don’t wanna be too forceful, and I’ve said before, I don’t wanna feel like a “rebound” guy.
But I want to be with her.
She means the world to me.
And lately, our relationship seems to be entering the “beyond awkward” stage.
“Hey Sara,” I greet her as she walks into the break room. “Hi Greg. What’s up?” ‘What’s up’!? Is she serious? “Not much. I just needed to take a break.” I give her a small smile, which she returns. “Yeah, extremely busy shift, isn’t it?” My God, do we have to talk about work? “Yeah, among other things,” I look away, knowing I’ve over talked again. “Yeah, well, I better get to the garage. Warrick’s got the victim’s car and it’s ready to be processed, so…” I totally blew it! “Later Sara,” I say as I watch her leave the room. “Later Greg,” She responds, not even looking back at me.
See what I mean?
Awkward!
All we do is talk about work, and whenever I try to change the subject, she almost cowers away from me.
How much does that suck?!
I’m so afraid that our relationship will never be the way it was.
Or the way it should be.
Our friendship is suffering horribly over this.
But everyone knows I’ve always wanted
so much more than just friendship.
And I truly believe that she does too. She’s just afraid of getting hurt again.
I want to show her that I would never, ever hurt her. Never!
I love her more than anything else in the universe.
Gosh, I love her more than rock music, surfing, DNA,
everything.
I have to let her know somehow, before I lose what may be my only chance.
My chance to love Sara Sidle the way she’s always deserved to be loved.
XOXO
Greg