CSI:Miami Answering Machines. What would they say??

kinkapoodles

kinkapoodles

Judge
I've been watching this in the NY forum and got to thinking. What would the Miami team have on their answering machines?

Here's my picks:

Horatio: You've reached Lt....Horatio Caine....I'm not at home because...I'm always...at work...No need to leave a message because...I'll never get it....call me on my cell. *beep*

Calleigh: Hey, this is Calleigh. I can't answer the phone right now (shots fired in background) because I'm either in the ballistics lab or at the firing range. Where else would I be? Leave me a message and I'll return your call when I run out of ammo. *beep*

Delko: You've reached Delko. Stop calling me you crazy, psycho women. One sniper is enough. I can get all the girls I want on my own. Anyone else, leave a message and I'll get back to you *beep*

Alexx: Hi, you've reached Alexx Woods. Please oh please, leave me a message. I'm stuck in the morgue all day talking to dead people and they don't talk back. I promise I'll return your call. *beep*

Frank: What the hell do you want? Don't you know I'm busy? Leave a message if you want. *beep*

Ryan: You've reached Ryan Wolfe. I can't answer the phone right now because I am obsessively cleaning my gun. Leave me a message and if I get the time, I'll return your call. *beep*

Speedle: You know who this is. You know what to do. So do it. *beep*
 
Horatio: you reached Horatio Caine...here's what i want you to do...here's my mobile nummber ********* , call me, and nobody gonna hurt you again! *beep*

Frank: What? you stuck on stupid? leave a message!! *beep*

Delko: hay girls, you reached Delko. Brown eyes, black hair,love sports....now tell about yourself! leave a message! *beep*

Calleigh: (guns are shooting everywere) sorry, can't hear you... leave a message! *beep*

Alexx: you reached Alexx Woods. honey...baby...sweetheart, i am busy right now..so leave a message please! *beep*

Speedle: yeah...well um...leave a message. *beep*
 
Horatio: Call me on my cell...it is never turned off.

Eric: Press one if your a guy, press two if your an ordanry girl...if your sexy and want a good time leave your name and number after the tone.

Ryan: I wont return your call because I will take the credit for your work.

Calleigh: Leave a message after the beepy thing with the calibure of your gun and the crime and I will be there!

Alexx: Oh my sweetie what have they done to you...leave your name number and message and I will phone you back and be nice.

Frank: What are you doing...dont you have one of thoese phones with the wheeee baning fireworks and gizmothings with flashing lights?

Speed:...you've reached the undercover agent line were open btween 3.02am and 3.06am.

Stetler: Please leave the fellony Horatio Caine has commited this time along with your name and number and I will deal with it. Thank you.
 
Calleigh: Hi, this is Calleigh. If you want me to come to work, fire a 22. If you want to talk, fire a 38. If you want a date, fire a 44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, because you know how to get a girl excited.

Speed: Thank you for calling the heavenly hotline. I am not in right now. Please leave your message at the sound of the harp music.
 
I thought of another one.

Ryan: Hi, this is Ryan Wolfe. I'm too busy either kissing Horatio's a** or chasing Natalia around the office trying to keep her away from Delko. Anywho, if you leave a message, I will call you back. *beep*

Natalia: You've reached Natalia. If this is Eric, come on over. If this is Ryan, leave me alone. I'm unavailable right now so leave me a message but please don't remind me that I am the mole and hated by the entire lab. *beep*

Valera: Hey, this is Maxine. Valera to my friends. Haha I'm not the mole. If this is Natalia, keep your hands off my Eric. You know what to do. *beep*
 
Megan: Sorry, the number you're dialing does not exist. Please check your number first... Sorry, the number you're dialing does not exist. Please check your number first... Sorry, the number you're dialing does not exist. Please check your number first...

(coz you have to put in your password right after her phone number...)

:lol: :lol: :lol:
 
Yelina: I am currently in South America. I plan to be back in Miami ASAP so please leave a message. I apologize for the inconvenience - blame the writers!

;)
 
LtKitty said:
Horatio: you reached Horatio Caine...here's what i want you to do...here's my mobile nummber ********* , call me, and nobody gonna hurt you again! *beep*

Frank: What? you stuck on stupid? leave a message!! *beep*

Delko: hay girls, you reached Delko. Brown eyes, black hair,love sports....now tell about yourself! leave a message! *beep*

Calleigh: (guns are shooting everywere) sorry, can't hear you... leave a message! *beep*

Alexx: you reached Alexx Woods. honey...baby...sweetheart, i am busy right now..so leave a message please! *beep*

Speedle: yeah...well um...leave a message. *beep*
Click to expand...

I love the Horatio Quote here's what i want you to do :lol: that is his trademark line :D
 
Raymond: Hello, this is Ray Caine. If I'm not in at the moment, then I'm probably off getting shot again, and shipped off to some other country. Leave me a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I stop faking my own death. *beep*
 
carlz31 said:
Raymond: Hello, this is Ray Caine. If I'm not in at the moment, then I'm probably off getting shot again, and shipped off to some other country. Leave me a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I stop faking my own death. *beep*
Click to expand...

^I'd have added "If you are calling because you have a kid and I'm the father.... please rather contact my brother. He knows how to handle that stuff"

or something :rolleyes:
 
H: Hi, this Horatio. I'm bullying araound over my suspects to vent my frustration after Season 4. Leave a message after the signal.
 
HAHA :lol: I love the 'here's what I want you to do' line! So funny and so H! And Frank's :lol:

Horatio: Umm hello...I'm busy right now because here in Miami, WE...NEVER...CLOSE...please leave a message and I'll get back to you.
 
Horatio: Hello, I can't come to the phone right now because I'm either chasing my wife's murderer, staring at the horizon with my hands on my hips, or putting on my sunnies in slowmotion. Leave a message. [beep]
 
(didn't see this thread)

Horatio: Hi, this is Horatio, I'm either at the lab or playing with my sunglasses. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you. If it's Stella, I'll be on a plane to New York as soon as possible, just tell me where the secret meeting point is. If it's Mac, just get down here and tell me about the case when you get here.

(is Ray Horatio's brother?)
 
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