Are We Paying You By The Word? - The CSI Booklist

Nice thread. I'll add some of my too(sorry if I repeat and if they're not too funny)


101 Ways How To Successfully Suck Up To Your Boss by David Hodges.

1001 Awesome One-Liners + Sunglasses + Even Better Pose by Horatio Caine.

101 Ways How To Get Rid Of Bugs by Gilbert Grissom.

How To Get Hurt In An Explosion by Horatio Caine.

How To Pick A Right Woman by Nick Stokes.

How Not To Urinate At A Crime Scene When You're A Newbie by Greg Sanders.

How To Pick A Perfect Husband by Catherine Willows.

101 Ways How To Be Loved By Your Co-workers by Conrad Ecklie and Rick Stetler.

101 Ways How To Be Angry by Greg Sanders.

How To Wear A Tie At A Crime Scene by Ray Langston.

Can't think anymore, gotta go sleep :(
 
Views From The Shadows: A Tarantula's Take On Ten Years Of Las Vegas Crime, by Stevie, with forward by Miss Piggy
 
:lol: Great ones... Here are some that came to me...

The Long Goodbye. How to Avoid a Hasty Exit . By Stella Bonasea. Special section by Riley Adams.

Avoiding the Dreaded 'Pink Slip'. By Wendy Simms and Jesse Cordoza

What? I'm Not Pregnant, I've Just Gained a Few.. By Calleigh Duquense
 
midnight_tiptoes said:
You're Never Fully Dressed Without A Smile: Achieving Complete Happiness by Horatio Caine, foreword by Calleigh Duquesne

The Luckiest Little Girl That Ever Lived (a children's book) by Madison Keaton

Be A People Person: A Guide by Gilbert Grissom

Love And Marriage: Learn To Trust And Respect Your Co-Workers by Ryan Wolfe

Ka-Boom!: My Life In This Fucking Lab by Greg Sanders

Little Boys Bible Storybook for Mothers and Sons: For Mothers and Sons (Little Boys) by Paul Millander, illustrations by Charles Shultz
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:lol::lol:

I have few:

'I just have it...aka how to create perfect one-liner' - by Horatio Caine
'How not to put yourself in danger at work' - by Eric Delko
'Rules are everything - strong will can prevent you from dating your attrative co-workers' by Calleigh Douquesne
 
How Not To Turn Your Back On A Psycho (Even If He Is In A Cell) by Doctor Ray Langston

How To Create A Celebrity Morgue Photo Book by Doctor Al Robbins

How To Avoid Flipping Over A Car by Nick Stokes

How Not To Lose Your Badge by Danny Messer and Eric Delko
 
Breakroom Etiquette: What To And What Not To Say During Meals When You Work In A Forensics Lab, by Nick Stokes
 
Here's some I was able to think of, sorry if there are any similar ones

How To Take Better Care of Your Car by Nick Stokes

My Relationship Advice by David Hodges

Ways To Keep Secrets Right Under Your Colleagues' Noses by Gil and Sara Grissom

How To Pick Up On Secret Relationships by Greg Sanders

Myths and Legends: Ways To Get Better Screentime by Greg Sanders

The Journey From Lab Rat To CSI by Greg Sanders and Wendy Simms

How To Be Heard But Never Seen: Part One by Mrs. Robbins and Mrs. Phillips

How To Be Heard But Never Seen: Part Two by Mrs. Robbins, Mrs. Phillips, and Gil Grissom
 
midnight_tiptoes said:
I thought it might be fun. The idea is you write the title and author of a book that would be incredibly short given their knowledge on the subject. In other words, topics our CSIs would be REALLY bad at writing. Example:

Ethics, Schmethics: Interpersonal Relationships In The Workplace by Gilbert Grissom and Sara Sidle

You Have The Right To Remain Fabulous! A Guide To Appropriate Workplace Attire by Catherine Willows, foreword by Stella Bonasera

¡Libérate Hombre! The Day Of Judgement Is Closely At Hand: Don't Let Your Co-Workers Push You Around by Nicholas Stokes (also available in broken Spanish)

Gay Spirit Warrior: An Empowerment Workbook for Men Who Love Men by Donald Flack, foreword by (wishes to remain anonymous)

We're All Pink Inside: Approaching Racial Issues in the Workplace With Tact by Frank Tripp

Necrophilia For Dummies: 101 Funny Uses For The Word 'Stiff' by Dr. Alexx Woods

Surviving Loss, Betrayal, Lies, Death, Drowning, Demotion, Addiction, And Geriatric Sex With Class and Professionalism by Catherine Willows

Labels Disable: Fat and Loving It! by Tony Vartann

Crazy And Me: A Survival Guide For Men Who Love To Give by Eric Delko

Whip It! The Long Lost Art of Communication by Lady Heather, illustrations by Gilbert Grissom

"Oh, What The Hell" - A Love Story by Gilbert Grissom, edited by Sara Sidle

"..." : Helping Your Co-Workers Mourn by Calleigh Duquesne

I'm Gonna Pretend I Didn't Hear That: When No Means No by Sara Sidle

Lil' Kid Lover: Using Proximity And Gratuitous Touching To Help Children Through Trauma by Horatio Caine (rejected titles: Let Me Kiss Your Boo-Boo Away and Funny Uncle Horatio Has Loving Hands)

He's Just Not That Into You by Rick Stetler, foreword by Sara Sidle (foreword retracted after printing)

Cancerous And Fabulous! Don't Let Your White Blood Cell Count Drag You Down by Marisol Delko
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I also think so.
 
How To Get Info From A Child Witness By Talking to Her Doll by Jim Brass

How Not to Fall Off a Building While Chasing A Suspect by Ryan Wolfe

How Not to Get Called A Jackal by Erica Sykes
 
1000 ways to not seem like a paedophile - by Lt. Horatio Caine
A Guide to Fathering - by Lt. Horatio Caine
What not to wear while Chasing a Suspect across a Roof - by Det. Stella Bonasera
Effective Ways to Tackle a Gun off of Suspect - by Holly Gribbs
 
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