Re: Will the REAL Horatio Caine Please Stand Up?
Whilst still on the subject of "Reward Offered for the Whereabouts of One Horatio Caine, Last Seen in May 2005", let’s see if I have this latest cockamamie straight...
Based upon the Season 3 DVD audio commentaries, at the end of Season 3, THEY claimed THEY were exhausted and had run out of ideas hence THEIR abruptly ending Season 3 with Raymond’s resurrection and the unceremonious packing off of Horatio’s raison d’etre, to Brazil for an Addams Family type reunion. THEY then claimed that for Season 4, THEY would refresh and revitalize the series, ostensibly one would imagine by offering something at least on par with the substance of Seasons 1- 3 but with some sort of inspiring creative angle.
So, in Seasons 1 – 3, there was the canon storyarc involving "dead/alive brother-Horatio-sister-in-law". Then in a flash of "inspiration" from their collective musings over the entire intervening summer, for Season 4, THEY offer us THEIR new and improved and refreshed and revitalized canon storyarc involving er, "dead mother-Horatio-junior staff’s sister."
How, pray tell by all that has a smidgen of originality, is THIS new and refreshed and revitalized and different from what was successfully and originally offered in Seasons 1-3? Give me strength!.
I can see the pattern emerging now; this new chickadee comes on board for this season, will be made a regular next season and then the following season she will be day-old toast. Horatio will get a spelling period, THEY will hit THEIR inbuilt “Ctrl-Alt-Delete” panic buttons and we will get the instantaneous Version 3.0 of Horatio Caine’s alternate reality.
Honestly! Is it possible to take out a class action suit against THEM for character and series assassination in the first degree? Ok, Steven Maeda, we really, really need you to get off Gilligan’s Island whilst THEY need to be stranded there, not just for a three-hour tour but for a long, long time.
After this latest piece of drivel from THEM regarding H’s personal scenario, I believe I owe an apology to sea cucumbers everywhere for denigrating its level of wit, creative or otherwise.
In closing...
"We seek him here,
we seek him there
The Real Miami seek him everywhere.
Is he in dark collusion or
Is he still sad but sane?
That damned elusive Horatio Caine..."
(To Baroness Orczy: Madam, my abject apologies.)