The Full Wallace/Hodges Experience #2

So to get the ball rolling and keep this thread alive while pabzi is away.

What are your favorite Hodges moments?
Mine are-

1) Hodges does the robot.

2) Hodges with the clothespin on his nose in "Dog Eat Dog"

 

A few more Hodges moments:

Pretty much anything from 4X4, but particularly "Preschool graduation parties are going to be off the hook." and checking out the sink, presumeably for mold.

David talking about getting back at his college professor. (Peeing on the handle of his car door.)

Giving Grissom the sweatshirt before Gris left for sabbitical.

Anyone else?

 

Any and every moment with Hodges is great but my favorites are...

__________

HODGES: The green powder on your vic's dress is open-celled phenolic foam,
holds more than forty times its weight in water. Reminds me of this girl I knew
in college--

GRISSOM: (interrupts) I don't need to hear about that.

_____

(Catherine walks through the hallway and into Trace. She puts a cup on the
table.)

HODGES: Oh, thank you, but there's no drinking or eating allowed in the lab.

CATHERINE: It's a urine sample.

HODGES: My bad.

CATHERINE: Get it to Tox. And ... (She gives Hodges the tampon.) Check this
for spermicide. Call me with the results.

(Hodges looks at the tampon.)

HODGES: Did you run out of proper swabs?

_____

(Hodges cuts the oven mitt open for Warrick.)

HODGES: I perfected my butterfly technique on chicken breasts. I sauté them in
a chardonnay reduction with herbes de provence. Drives women wild. (beat)
Well, mom. Now say the magic words.

WARRICK: "Shut up, Hodges"?

HODGES: No. "Open sesame."

_____

GREG: Hey, got some gasoline samples for you.

HODGES: Thanks, Greg. It's gonna take a little while to fill my tank. Why
don't I get you a funnel?

____

HODGES: I almost keyed a car once.

NICK: You what?

HODGES: I know, but, in the end, I couldn't go through with it. So I peed on
the door handles instead.

NICK: So they'd freeze up and can't get them open?

HODGES: No. It was San Diego.

NICK: Over a girl?

HODGES: Over a "B." Professor gave me one on my term paper. I felt I deserved
an "A".

_____

HODGES: Know what makes human bones glow in the dark?

GREG: Love?

HODGES: Tetracycline.

(Greg is reaching under the car seat and pulls out a revolver. He looks at it.
Hodges looks over his shoulder.)

GREG: You want to help me with a little experiment?

HODGES: Sure.

(Hodges goes to the counter to put on a pair of gloves. Greg gets out and goes
to the front of the car.)

GREG: Grab that evidence bag?

(Hodges walks over to Greg.)

GREG: Okay, let me see that.

(Hodges takes the hood ornament out of the bag and gives it to Greg. Greg gives
Hodges the hood ornament he’s carrying.)

GREG: Take this.

(Greg tries the hood ornament on the hood. It doesn’t match.)

GREG: No go.

(He swaps ornaments with Hodges and tries it on the hood. Hodges watches
intently. It matches.)

GREG: Okay. Looks like a match to me.

HODGES: This is your experiment?

GREG: Actually, it is. Thanks.

_____

(Grissom opens the present and finds a WILLIAMS sweatshirt inside. Hodges
stands in front of the desk and grins as Grissom takes the sweatshirt out of
the box.)

GRISSOM: How did you know about this?

HODGES: I saw an approved leave of absence form on Ecklie's desk. Don't worry,
I didn't say anything to anyone else. Did you think that you were going to
teach at my alma mater in the dead of winter without warm clothes?

GRISSOM: I thought you went to college in San Diego.

HODGES: Graduate school. Undergraduate was all about the Bay State. Crazy
times, my friend, crazy times. Those Hampshire girls down in Amherst? Insane.

GRISSOM: Thank you.

HODGES: You're welcome.

(Grissom sets the sweatshirt and box to the side. Hodges sits down in the
chair.)

HODGES: What are you teaching?

GRISSOM: The seasonal fluctuations in observed behaviors of the Walden Pond
swamp mosquito.

HODGES: Excellent. Yeah, I don't know what college was like for you, but for
me it was a new beginning, a chance to reinvent myself. For the first time in
my life, I felt like I fit in. Not like now. I mean ... you and I are close,
but sometimes I just don't think the others get me.

(Catherine knocks on the door.)

CATHERINE: You got a second?

HODGES: He's kind of busy.

(Grissom and Catherine both look at Hodges. Hodges gets to his feet.)

HODGES: Oh. When you get a chance, hit the Purple Pint. Ask for Cookie. Tell
her Davey Hodges sent you. Drinks'll be on the house.

GRISSOM: Crazy times.

HODGES: Yeah.

(Hodges leaves the office.)

_____

HODGES: (o.s.) You rang?

(Hodges walks into the lab.)

NICK: Yeah, I think I need a hand here, Hodges.

HODGES: Well, what is this?

NICK: It's from an '89 Jane Doe. I'm looking for anything that will help us
out.

HODGES: Those look like rat droppings.

NICK: That's because they are rat droppings, man.

HODGES: Are you familiar with the hantavirus? Carried by rodents, transmitted
to humans when they inhale vapors from contaminated urine, saliva or feces.
That crap will kill you.

NICK: (interrupts) Hodges ... glove up.

(Hodges sticks his gloved hands in the mess.)

HODGES: If I start leaking blood from my eyeballs, I'm blaming you.

There's tons more that I can think of.

 

I was just in San Diego ... crazy.

Hey NikkyJamez, I love the icon and banner. I see Josh Luca, Matthew McChounghey (sp?), and is that Christian Bale?

The Hodges Robot is one of my favorite moments. I posted a wallpaper of it awhile back.

 

robot rocks...

i like the conversation about housepaint on a car... about how he doesn't pay attention to what people do...
sara: that's smart
david: they're not

 

Ah so many great David moments. I think one of the differences between Greg and David's humor is that a lot of the times David isn't trying to be funny.

Another great moment that hasn't been mentioned:

David and Greg playing the Dukes of Hazzard game in GD. David--"Oh, and by the way, uh, this is just the work me. You haven't had the full David Hodges experience." Greg--"I think I'm having it now"

 

Yeah the icon had Josh Lucas and Matthew McConaughey (< correct spelling), I think it's a general rule here in Texas that you have to know how to spell his name :lol: and that was Christian Bale, but as you can see, I've changed those, I think I change them every week, I just can't ever find one I like .

Yeah Hodges dancing was a great moment, and so was the Dukes of Hazzard Game, I actually have a copy of that, and every time I play I get a big smile on my face because it reminds me of Hodges.

 

You're from Texas ... I'm from Texas too ... I just can't spell his name. "Not the Rum" ... love it.