Hi everyone! It's my first fan fiction and english isn't my first language so don't be rude with me!tell me what u think about it and tell me the english mistake i've made! After a hard day of work she was standing there in the cloakroom of nyc scientific police , her hair was wet she was lost in her toughts when as she was closing the door of her rack she heard: " Hey stella" " You've scared me mac" she says " Sorry" " Do u often watch girls while they're taking a bath?she asked to tease him " " I wasn't watching u or I was but not that way" " Which way?" " You're so beautiful" " You must be kiding me i look like a wet dog when my curly hair is wet" " I'm serious, u know i'm realizing that i've never looked at u like I should have" " mmm u 're worring me mac do u feel good?" " I've never felt that good in my entire life he answered just before taking her in his arms with pasion, they were so closed that she could feel his breath on her face " R u sure that's what u want mac?" " Yes i'm sure" Several minutes after as they were on the floor stellaa little bit out of breath said: " That was whaouh I didn't know u could be so passioned" " So do I" As they were enjoying this moment of tenderness Mac 's bip rang : " Damn it it's flack he's got news about my murder case sorry see you later" " Yes , see u later and as he was crossing the door she said : "Hey mac i l....." " You what?" " No nothing take care" Few days after as they were is their car going back on a crime scene for finding evidence stella finally said : " So u didn't call me after we ....u know" " Sorry I was busy" " That's all u have to answer, we ' ve made love I tought that maybe it 's been as important for u as it's been for me" " Yep but u know me let's do like if nothing had never happened " " U must be kiding me mac?nothing , it was nothing ? You know I love u since the first day I've saw u but before u were married but now maybe it's time for u to close this chapter of ur life don't u think?" " You're right i was married and i'm still i'm not ready for that" " U know what , forget it nothing happened" she bruttaly answered as she was getting out of the car As they were in the stair of the building she was just furious after him and he could feel that. " Let's talk about it later we're here to investigate a murder right"? " Right if u say so" They enterred in the appartement and mac said " Go on the left in the bed room i'll go in the living room we must find something here" "Ok boss" she answered ironicly, but as she was walking towards the bed room she saw a guy with a gun and she just had the time to said macccccccccccc and bang she felt on the floor. "Stella" he yelled as he was running towards her and took her in his arms "No not again I won't lose the love my life one more time please stay with me i love u" " Me to " she said before falling inconsious. "Stay with me please I need u" whe have a wounded dectective here please send an ambulance here " he screamed on his radio . As he was hearing the ambulance outside getting closer he was still talking to her "Please, please don't leave me alone in this world I won't ever be able to live here without u" It was the first time he was crying since clair 's died I didn't mean it when i said it was nothing please of course it was important you're my everything please.... 3 days after stella was still in coma and mac was walking in the corridor of the hospital again and again near her room when aidan came : "Have u caught him?"he asked "No not yet but we will i promise"she said to confort him " I want every NY officer on this case working day and night until we 've got him!" "Of course" " U know I should have been more careful when we came in the appartement" "It's not your fault" "Of course it's my fault I wasn't careful enough when , you came on a crime scene you must be really careful even if it's not the first time criminals sometimes came back and I didn't see him but Stella did and she just jump in front of me to protect me she saved me I 'm the one who should be here between death and life not her" "She knew what she was doing that's part of the job I would have done the same for you or for her we're like a family we are ready to risk our lives to each others you know that and Stella would never let anyone hurt you or anyone else it's tipically her : others come first "I know but I'm the boss you know when some of you is in trouble I take care of it and i'm the one who's supposed to die for saving your lives to the opposite" " We're going to find him and he will pay I promise, and she the strongest woman I've ever met she will be fine u won't lose her mac believe me" " I'd like to be as optimistic as you aidan thanx for coming i'm gonna stay here until she 'll awakes. Stella was still in coma , Mac was sitting on her bed looking at her, remembering all the good moment they had together, she was the only personn who was able to touch him in his heart mac wasn't the kind of guy who liked to talk about his fellings but with stella it was differents they don't have to talk to understand each other a simple look at her and he know what she thinks and she's also the only one who dares to say " hey mac you're wrong" they often fight that was like their relation was ... Mac was holding her hand thinking how beautiful she was when she slowly moved her hand ....
thanx a lot i was desperate that someome has read it!and you're french it's great!i wish other fans were nice and read it but they didn't ...
thanx a lot it was my first and english is not my native langage but i did my best i hope i will become better writting others fictions!
yes i'll write more soon for now i'm little sick but i'm thinking about it at the end stella get out the coma but i don't know i will me her react after what happened so i have to think about it i want it to be as good as the first so i have to think carefully about it!thanx for reading it!
heya, aww this was great, your english i spretty good, i understood it all, there were few mistakes, but you an tell what you meant i could beta for you if you like?, or try to, when i'm not at college, was great story, i really like it, can't wait for more, if you would like me to beta my e-mail is sara_sidle_rocks@hotmail.co.uk, add me to your msn messenger if you have it, just letme know where you added me from, lol , loved your story, thanx, luv CalleighRox xxxxxxxxxxx
thanx a lot i added u on my msn hoping we'll take soon and maybe u could correct my mistake and i think i'm going to uptade it tonight if i have the insiration but i can't get of my head last night episodes with frankie so maybe he will be on my next fan fiction stella may have cheat on him in my story with mac i will think about it but i didn't considered the fact that she was with him in the show but thanx to last night ep i remember now i will see!bye
Finally i uptade my fiction hope u like it! chapter 2 : She slowly opened her eyes : " Hey sleeping beauty, it's good to see you back how do you feel?" " Like someone who has been shot, a little confused " she answered trying no to look too bad. " I 'm sorry for what happened I Should have been more careful when we came back on the crime scene, I wish he 'd shot me ......" " Don't blame yourself , it wasn't your fault ok?" " I know but if I had ever loose you you know I don't know if I...." " I know mac you don't need to tell me anything you'd never had to I Know you as well as I know myself " she said to him trying to reassure him ,but tell me you got him" " Not yet , but we're getting closer, considering the evidences he 's the murderer we were looking for he was there to destroy evidences and he did but he left his print and they match we the one we found one the murder weapon I'll find him I promise, now all you have to worry about is your health, you've been very lucky the ball didn't caused big dammage expect a little scar on your chest you will be fine" " Damn it the most perfect part of myself with my brain" That how stella was she was suffering but she hide it because she didn't want mac to blame himself and she also felt embarassed so she laughted about it. She also hope that would avoid the inevitable conversation and the truth was that even she was uncouncious she heard everything he said to her and she only remember saying I love you too but thanx god he doesn't know that she heard the whole declaration. But what makes her feel unconfortable was that she didn't know if he said that because he was about to loose her or because he was ready to move on with his morn. But she didn't care he was here for her that was all that mattered. " yeah ,but you know everyone worried about you even frankie..." " He came here?" " Yes" " Did you tell him that we..." " Of course no but he told me you dumped him after we..." " What did you expected? I cheated on him with you and I'm not a cheater I had to broke with him" " Sorry when I kissed you I wasn't thinking about the collateral dammage it will cause in reality I wasn't thinking at all I just let myself ......." " You hurt me mac" " I know would you forgive me, the way I treated you?" " I don't know? you know how I feel for you but I didn't expected that I could die for you and I know your goal wasn't to hurt me and I really think you're not ready to have a real relation ship and you're not even ready to give or tell me what I need " " Just tell me I'll do everything you want me to I won't let someone I really care about leave me not again, so just tell me" " Just let me alone now I need sometimes alone with myself to think about it, I mean we're not teenager I can do sex like no strings attached I can't handle it but the way you treated me...I was expected more from you I don't blame you Mac cause I know you more anyone in the world, but you l know I have to think about it , I'm tired now" "Ok but let me tell you it was special for me since claire died i'd never felt that way , you know what I mean" " Of course I do bye" " Take care, I'll be back " He left her room thinking wishing he could be more expressive about his feeling but he could'nt not yet he wanted to be with her but something was bugging him. But he knows that she understand him and that she could be patient but for how long ?And did he has lost her with his attitude? TO BE CONTINUED, hope u liked it
Woot woot update finally heh. I liked it very much. The angst and tension between the pair is very fun to read. I do hope they make up in the end!
i hope !the think is that i put i little of myself in stella's reaction!and i inclued frankie in the story because when i saw last's night episode it was oubvious that he has to be here ! i will uptade soon i hope!thanx
Yay! an update! I'm so glad Stella broke up with Frankie, now if only that happenned on the show.... PLease update soon
yes i didn't think about including frankie in mly story but when i saw last night ep i was like she has to dump him so i made her cheat on him!thanx for reading it i really like that i'll uptade tomorrow i think and there will be more action !
You better honey! We gotta get our SMAcKED action from somewhere, and where better than great fan fiction like yours?