Late Motherhood - what's your opinion?

CSIgrad said:
i work in a hospital, and whenever we get a patient at age 60s, we consider them young, because now a day people are living longer and staying healthy longer and they stay working for longer amount of years
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Yeah, 60 is young, but not when you're talking about having a child. Most people consider 40s a quite an old age to have a child. I've heard of people in their 40s who had a child and couldn't physically cope with it. How's somebody in their 60s going to cope?

And you don't know what her health is going to be like in 10 years time, whether she and her husband will physically be able to take care of a child. I think there's a reason why the menopause happens at around 50.
 
I think it depends on your deffination of old. My parents were older when they had me..and yeah i'm not going to lie, it effected me a lot, I would have kids ask why my grandpa was picking me up from school when it was really my dad, when i was little I didn't know how to handle it..but now that i am older it's diffrent I don't think about it as much. The one thing I do think about it my children...if I choose to have any...my parents might not get to see as much as their life as I would like them to. But really, my parents love me and I think that is the most important thing, and my child hood wasn't "limited" becasue they were older, I still did all the kid stuff, i rode on my dads sholders, my mom swung me around and played with me, it wasn't any diffrent then ayone elses. I do however, think that being over 60 when you have a child isn't the most responsible thing to do, you're not exatly thinking about the childs futre and how your age will affect them ( my parents were younger then 60 needless to say).
 
I had the same issue, SarasGirl. Kids on the bus can be cruel when your parents are a little older than theirs. It's not cruel to have a child if you're defined as "over the child-bearing age."

She's a well-renowned psychologist, right? Even though she has three other children maybe she wanted to focus on her career more? You would be surprised, but a LOT of women are doing that rather than going out and having kids at the age of 20. Would you call those people selfish too?

My parents are older than most and they are just as capable of caring for me financially, emotionally and physically. Even though they couldn't lift me up and swing me around, my childhood wasn't limited either, they're not selfish people, they wanted to have a child later than other people, they wanted to live their lives before they decided to have another child, I don't think that makes them cruel in any sense.

And it's not as if this woman woke up one morning and said "hey...I'm gonna get pregnant today..." She put a lot of thought into having another child. She seems well-abled to take care of this child as well. She's not poor, she's not dead, and if she were in any health troubles the doctor would have strongly advised against it, or they would have lost the baby.

I'm sorry but I find your "cruel to the child" and "selfish" reasoning to be a little ill-informed. Cruel to the child is having a baby at whatever age and not putting any thought into it just accepting it as it comes. Cruel to the child is having it where you are in such a desolate state that you have no possible way to take care of it.

And as for the "cruel to the child" if they happen to die? So what? Everyone will die eventually, that doesn't make them cruel if they happen to die while their child is very young, that can happen to anyone, young or old. They could have cancer or know that they will die at a pre-determined age, but they still want to have a child, does that make these people cruel? For wanting to have their own baby?

For your argument, what if an older couple adopts a child and then dies? Is that not cruel as well?

The child may not have had their parents for as long as the rest of the children out there, but who's to say that their childhood, their life and all of its fairness was robbed of them?
 
My mom told me a story today. My dad was older when I was born, and one day, when I was about a year old, he was carrying me on his shoulders when a lady came up and said "What a beautiful little girl, is she your first grandchild?"

My dad was really embarassed, and I feel sort of bad, because people assume he's my granddad a lot, since he has grey hair and stuff. He looks older then he is, whereas my mom looks WAY younger then she is. They're an odd couple.
 
I read a study somewhere that women who have children in their forties tend to get themselves into shape pretty quickly because it is alot more effort to raise a child when you get older because let's face it you do slow down after 35.

I had my daughter at 30 and I wish I was a bit younger because I think I would have had more energy, but there are a lot of women in their forties and fifties who are in better shape then me and have more energy so sometimes physical shape depends on the person.

But at 55, I don't know. Most of the fifty year olds I know are at the stage where the kids have just left home and they are free so to speak so when I asked if they would like have another baby they just said, "Hell no!" They are starting to party again.

But, there's another trend that's growing and that's the number of grandparents looking after the kids while the parents are away at work because daycare is very expensive and the parents feel a lot safer having the kids at home.

So there are a number of kids who are being raised by older folks and maybe this woman just wanted her own kid. Time will tell, she might make a great parent and it's the quality of time you have with your kids, not the quantity.
 
I agree with you Beautiful Loser, I mean if the parents love the child I really think that is the most important thing.

And I also agree with you on having a child at any age and not caring for it is what is cruel. For example, I know a little girls whos parents were in their late 20s early 30s when they had her..and two of the most irrsponsible people I know. They ended up leaving their daughter behind and going out to party, she now live with her grand parents. People say that having a child when you are in your middle to late 20s is responsible because you have lived though life, well I don't think that is nessasarly true, I think it really depends on the person and their lives. The bottom line is that any one who chooses to have a child needs to plan and give the child alll their love and deovtion to their childhood, anything less is cruel, no matter what age the parents are.
 
myfuturecsi said:
I read a study somewhere that women who have children in their forties tend to get themselves into shape pretty quickly because it is alot more effort to raise a child when you get older because let's face it you do slow down after 35.
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Also, according to an article that came out in the news last year, it could be to do with genes too, as some older mothers (45 year olds) have a distinct genetic profile. According to this article, mothers who gave birth easily at age 45 and over have a select group of genes that are significantly different from younger mothers who found it difficult to give birth.

In addition to this, research has suggested other benefits of late motherhood, such as protection from onset of ovarian cancer, and the prolonging of life.

I'm not saying I believe these are true and that they are necessarily good reasons to have a child later in life, just raising awareness of a few arguments that weigh on the positive side here. :)
 
since her body would have NATURALLY stopped her ability to have children, she should not have had a kid. i was born when my mom was 30.my gramdna is now like 63 or something. that lady should be having moody teenage grandchildren at this point, just like mine and a lot of other people 60 and up, not just now having more children. it's just not right. she might die before the kid graduates from high school, and that's just not fair. that's all i have to say.
 
A little OT here Wibble, but about your quote, I didn't know that Dusty Springfield did a version of that song. More on topic...

What about people who can't have their own children naturally and choose to concieve through artificial means? Does that mean that they too cannot have a child? This argument can be the same as the abortion argument, people are going to do what they want to do. It's her life, it's her decision, and I think that child is going to be well taken care of. As stated several different ways earlier, it's the quality of time spent with the child not the quantity.
 
These days, people live longer and the technology is more advanced thereby giving women who are 28 years and upward the chance to bear children. However,the mother has to be in good health ---that's a given.I f she isn't , who knows what deficiency she'll pass on to her offspring?
 
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