Ok, since I heard it was so suck-tacular, I watched it and tried to make my commentary amusing. The result is more than slightly slash-tastic. :devil:
~ Lulz. Is it bad that I'm laughing at the opening sequence? It's so...dramatic.
~ *tackles Angell and does unspeakably naughty lezbean things to her*
~ 5 seconds into the dialogue and I can already tell the episode is going to feel
off somehow. Clearly, we need the writers involved.
~ Oh dear, a human meteorite. Wouldn't there be more splatter if you fell from space? Bits and pieces all over the place, if you will.
~ Another
galaxy, Danny? Sorry, but that wasn't even funny. It's probably because I'm a dweeb that likes to read about astronomy and such, but a
galaxy? The closest stars to Earth other than the Sun (the Alpha Centauri system, although Proxima Centauri is technically the closest of the three) are about four light-years away, and it's within the
same galaxy. Blah blah, I'm a dork. The body coming from outer space is ridunkulous enough, but another galaxy isn't even amusing to me. [/loser] Long story short, I wouldn't have grinned, I would have rolled my eyes at him.
~ Besides, if the dead kid is coming from another galaxy, he should do it right: in the TARDIS.
[/loser^2]
And thusly, I will never get laid.
~ SID!
~ The lyrics to this song made me curl my lip like, 'WTF are they playing?'
~ *ruffles Danny's hair* Sorry, this scene isn't thrilling me and I need to amuse myself.
~ Cannibal? Sid, you're so morbid. *gives you cookies*
~ Poor Bob, having to deliver that line about re-entry. >.< And to think Adam was reluctant to disagree with his expert opinion in "Child's Play".
~ Hai hai, we're casting a chick who has to go poo-dooby. Run around like an imbecile, plz...Perfect, you get the job!
(Yes, I know she could have to pee rather than poo, but poo is funnier and so I'm going with that instead.)
~ You gotta pay to poo?! This is an outrage! Pooing is a basic human right, damnit, how dare you make me pay?! *shakes fist angrily*
~ Who's betting her bowels let go when the water flew at her? Lulz.
I'm sorry, forgive me--pooing your pants is no laughing matter. *is ashamed*...*snickers*
~ Flack, I shall now do unspeakably naughty things to you--but only after I take that tie and burn it on the ground while dancing gleefully in a circle around it.
~ Dishwasher/Port-A-Potty OTP!
Look, they had a wittle baby-thing:
Aww!
~ I just had the mental image of Flack and a bunch of other cops standing around outside the bathroom like 'LOL, no,
you do it!' 'I dare you!' Aww, boys, they never grow up, do they? ^_^
~ LOL, you, non-descript dude, are in charge of guarding the fancy port-a-potty. Your buddies are gonna rag on you later.
~ Mmm, Sheldon. :devil: Even a self-cleaning port-a-potty couldn't handle the unspeakably dirty things I'm thinking about doing to you. *purr* But don't worry, it's okay to be dirty sometimes. :devil:
~ Ooh yeah, baby--only you could disassemble a bathroom and make it sexy. *spanka spanka*
~ LOL, the sign behind him says "No Loitering"--I don't know why, but that amuses me.
~ Kendall's all, 'Look at me process evidence while being pouty *pout*'
~ I suppose Adam is busy lurking around corners and hiding under tables so he can pounce on Sheldon and do unspeakably filthy sexual things to him--I can't blame him. After all, Sheldon is a hot brick of sexual chocolate. It's what I would do.
Still, I'd like to see his pretty, bearded face.
~ OMG, I'm only ten minutes in?! *weep*
~ *pout and process, pout and process*
~ Long processing scene is long.
If you're trying to fill time, do it by having Sheldon go undercover as a pimp.
Whaaat?
~ Why does everybody seem so sluggish?
~ Damn, Danny looks hot. O.O
I'm betting Adam tackled him and took advantage of his sluggish behavior to do unspeakably naughty things to him before sending him on his way.
I know
I would.
~ "...eclipses your spaceman theory", el-oh-el.
~
Overkill: an excess of what is required or suitable, as because of zeal or misjudgment. (See: the spaceman crap in "Playing With Matches")
~ "Butt board", did she say? Was that her code for telling Lindsay that she's going to tie her up and spank her later or something?
'
DO NOT WANT! x_X
~ Oh Danny, don't be so uncomfortable when ladies are discussing balls--or are you still feeling shameful and dirty after what Adam did to you? It's okay, have a good cry. The shame will go away. *pet pet*
~ "I bore easily"--so do I, apparently, because the combo of Kendall, Lindsay and sluggish!Danny is boring me out of my frickin' mind.
~ Oh my, Kendall and Lindsay are sharing lingering glances. We all know what
that means. *wink wink nudge nudge nudge wink nudge* :devil:
~ Lulz at the way Sheldon is walking! Either he's jaunty because Adam rocked his world or he's trying to cover for the fact that he's got a sore--never mind. :devil:
~ Also: daaaaamn, I can't blame Adam for lurking around corners. Sheldon is nummeh. :devil:
~ Oh my, Sheldon's been consulting with Adam about evidence. Convenient. :devil:
~ Also: glasses. Guh.
~ Stellaaaaaaaa, don't hide your chesticles from me.
~ That zoom in on Manhattan thing was kinda lame.
~ Also, Kendall, move your scrawny ass out of Adam's nerd chair. Once he's done with his latest booty call and releases Sheldon, he's gonna be back--and
so not amused. *taps foot impatiently*
~ Lindsay's sweater looks ill-fitting or something.
~ LOL, it's like they didn't even try to get Anna's hand-movements to match what was happening on the screen. Did they just tell her to randomly poke at it or something?
~ Bess, darling, could you please
try to inject some life into your lines? Or is your only purpose to try to make your delivery as flat as Anna's to make her look better by comparison?
Here, have your free ticket on the failboat. *hands over*
~ I will not chuckle at Sheldon's handling of the graduated cylinder. I will not chuckle at Sheldon's handling of the graduated cylinder. I will not chuckle...*snorfle*
GRAB IT LIKE YOU MEAN IT, MAN!
There, that's a bit better.
Oh my! Sheldon,
Mac is standing right there!
...:devil: No, I will not apologize.
~ LOL, it sounded like he said "automatic puppet toilet". :lol: *is easily amused*
~ Geez, I'm only 19 minutes in?!
~ Sorry, the luge crap doesn't thrill me. *yawn*
ZOMG I'M BECOMING KENDALL O NOEZ!
~ Hee, I love you, Angell my dear, but quit swinging your ponytail.
~ See, that's my girl. She thinks quick. Plus, she's clearly resourceful. Mama likey. :devil:
---Resumed much later because I was interrupted by the need to go to the bank and give away monies, buy groceries, bicker with my sister, write news articles, eat, squee about Chad Allen on my LJ, stare off into space, twiddle my thumbs, pick my boogers and otherwise waste time doing things that don't involve finishing this episode.
Ok, I'm situated again, wearing my retainers. *grumble grumble* Luckily for you, the speech impediment they give me doesn't translate to my notes.
---
~ As I was saying: Me/Angell OTP! ^_^
ILU BB!
~ Sucky guest-stars. *sigh*
~ Did Danny just stop a runaway rolling stool? LOL, were they rushing to finish, mistakes and all?
~ Danno needs a nappy-nap. *pats chest* Here, lovey, I'll snuggle you amongst my ample bosom.
~ Wow, talk about casting the wrong guy to deliver Seth's lines. >_<
~ So Adam figured out the wax and Sheldon comes back with the results--and a new shirt. Oh dear, clearly Adam got the other one all dirty while doing unspeakably naughty things. :devil: Good thing our dear Dr Hawkes has a spare.
~ God, Sheldon is one fine specimen of manflesh--too bad he's barely in this damn episode to show that he's
more than that. *sigh*
~ (I love the little wristband though--reminds me of something Adam would wear.
Hehe.)
No, I won't apologize.
~ If that guy had been in jail, wouldn't they have his DNA in the system already? (I'm not sure how that all works.)
~ Lulz at Danny tapping the window with his badge and gesturing for the guy to come there.
~ Hai hai, more crappy guest-acting.
~ Aww, poor Flack. *chuckles* U so funny.
~ Gah, Mac, change your &*@$# ringtone!
~ I can almost see Stella's chesticles!!! ^_^
~ It's seriously called "wee-lit"? That's what it sounded like to me. Lulz.
~ Hee, Flack is in the Horatio pose. Hide the sunglasses!
~ *snickers* Oh Sheldon, stop holding big tubes up near your face, please--it makes me giggle like a 13 year-old!
*snorfle* Knock it off!
~ Aww, Sheldon is so cute when he's all pleased with himself. ^_^
~ 'And turn into a human torch'--U so cute, Danny. :lol:
~ Sounded like Stella was reciting from a book about the gold thing. She aint Reid from Criminal Minds, yo--I ain't buying it.
~ Mac was all like, 'Bitch plz, you've been pwnd', and Seth was all like *glare*.
**********
And thus ends my long--but hopefully amusing--commentary on the episode. Don't applaud, just send Sheldon wearing nothing but a silk robe and a smile. :devil: