CSI:NY...Don't forget to say Good-bye

When Angell got in the car Don whispered....

"Take me to the Crime Lab Jess."

"Don...you need to go home and rest. The lab is the last place you need to be."

"I said to the lab Jess. You either take me or I take myself."

Jess knew it was pointless to argue. She only hoped that Sheldon and Sid had had the body transported already to the Mortuary. Pulling into the Station Don got out and walked straight down to see Sid. While Jess called Mac.

"Hello."

"Mac...it's Jess. I need you down at the Crime Lab now. Don made me bring him here. I'm not sure how he'll react with Sid."

"I'm on my way Jess. Stay with him."

Following down the stairs Jess could hear Don through the door.

"Where is he Sid? I want to see him. I need to see him. I need to say good bye. Don't you undrerstand that. I need to see him."


"I'm sorry Don. He's not here. He was sent over to the Mortuary. Why don't you have a seat."

"I don't need a seat....I need Danny."


Tossing the tray out of the way Sid moved, as all his instruments went flying. Watching Don with fear he began opening all the coolers.

"I know he's here. I know he is. So either you can help me Sid, or I can tear this place apart."


Slamming his hands against the cooler over and over he sobbed...

"Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanny........pleeeeeeeeeeease Danny........I need you. Pleeeeeeeeeeease...God why?? Why didn't you take me. Please God bring him back to me...take me instead. God I don't want to live without him. Pleeeeeease help me die. take me to Heaven too. Pleeease God, I want to go too."

Mac came through the door.

"Don....Don ...look at me Don. I want you to focus. Don...."

Facing Mac with anger and pain he attacked him. Only this time Mac was ready for him. Grabbing him in his arms, he held him. Held him tightly as he screamed and pushed to try and get out of Mac's arms.

"Listen Don...Danny's gone. He's gone. He's never coming back. I know this hurts. But you need to understand Danny is dead Don. He's gone."


"Then I want to die too Mac....I don't want to live. Why doesn't anyone understand...it should have been both of us...I don't want to live anymore."


"What about Angell Don...Do you plan on leaving her behind. Do you?? Who's going to look after her if you leave. What about Mitch. Did you think about your nephew. He's already lost one Uncle. Do you want him to lose two?? Think about it Don...you are needed here. You can't leave those who love you behind.... We all loved Danny. We are all in pain and dispare from him leaving us this way. But we can't change what happened Don. You need to understand that."

"Noooooooooooo....noooooooo...it's not true...Danny wouldn't leave me alone like this. He wouldn't. It's always been the two of us. He wouldn't leave without saying good bye. He wouldn't Mac. Why can't you understand that? He wouldn't leave without a good bye."

Sid was in tears. God he could feel Don's pain at the loss of his best friend. He could feel his suffering as he faught to get out of Mac's arms.

"Shh....come on Don....shhh...it's going to be okay. I promise you will get to say good bye. It's just now isn't the time Don. I swear to you...you will get to say good bye."

Angell stood beside Sid with his arms wrapped around her as Don cried for the second time in Mac's arms.
 
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While Angell took Flack home. Mac helped Sid clean up.

"Do you think Don is going to be alright Mac. I'm really concerned about him. I've never seen him so heartbroken."

"To be honest Sid. I don't know? I can only hope with time he'll be alright. I can understand his pain with not being able to say good bye. I felt the same way when my Claire died. All Don's pain is what I felt. There were several nights I wanted to die. Just to be in Heaven with Claire. "

Sid understood. He could feel Mac's pain. Even though it had been years he could still feel Mac's loss.

"Then I found Stella. Sure it took us several years to realize that we were always in love, but when we finally figured it out I've had nothing but happiness ever since. She's my new world. Her and Mitch are my today and tomorrow. Claire is now my past."

"Thanks for helping me clean up Mac. I really appreciate it."

"Anytime Sid. Take care."

"Oh...hey Mac?"

"Yeah??"

"Any idea when the Memorial will be?"

"Soon Sid. Within the next couple days."

Walking out Mac headed home.

Once Angell had the perscription filled for Don she gave him one with a glass of water. Helping him into the bed he fell asleep. Walking back out into the living room she felt the wave of nausea hit her. Running into the bathroom she threw up.

God all this stress was taking its toll on her system. Or so she thought.

Sheldon was at the Hospital waiting for Brenda to finish her shift. When she was ready to go they headed home.

"Any idea how Don is doing?"

"I spoke with Mac a few minutes ago. It seems Don did head over to lab to find Danny. Mac had to race over there and get him back under control. He's in alot of pain."

"This is terrible Sheldon. So close to Christmas too. Any idea when the memorial is yet?"

"Mac said in a coulple days. I guess this is going to be Don's time to say good bye to Danny."

"Aww...hopefully when all is put to rest he'll heal."

"I'm sure he will. He has Angell, Mac and Mitch."

"Don't you go forgetting about yourself Sheldon. You are there to help too."

"I know Brenda. Let's go home. I'm starving."
 
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I'm going to get to the next chapter soon. I need some time as I'm working on a Memorial for Danny. I'm just waiting for input from a friend. As soon as I get this I'll post the chapter. I need Don's good bye to be perfect.:);)
 
Flashback

Get up against the wall now. I said now!!! Don't move.

*bang, bang, bang.*

"Daaaaaaanny...Danny...come on man breathe. Breathe Danno."

Waking Jess from sleep. She shook Don awake.

"Don...Don...wake up. Wake up Don.." She cried.

Quickly waking up he grabbed Jess in his arms and sobbed into her neck.

"He's gone Jess. He's really gone. How am I supposed to go on without him. He was my other half, my best friend, best pal. How can......."

"Shh...I know Don...I know you're hurting really bad. I'm right here for you. Right beside you, holding you, comforting you, helping you through."

"I still see it Jess...I see the blood pouring out of him as I pumped on his chest. God Jess it was like a fountain. I tried so hard to control the bleeding. But everytime I tried more would pour out. Then he opened his eyes for the briefest of moments. He looked right at me Jess...at me..begging me to help him."

"Ooohhhh Don...I'm sure he knows you did everything you could. Did you ever think he knew he wasn't going to make it, so he opened his eyes to say good bye...she cried."

"I just don't know Jess...all I know is I feel empty inside. It's like someone stole part of my soul. It just hurts so bad....he sobbed.

Jess knew Don would need alot time to heal, to accept what had happened. She also knew all she could do was be there for him every second of everyday he needed her.

Leaning over she gently took her hand and caressed his face, stroking her thumb at his tears as they fell. then leaning in Don kissed her through his tears. Mixing their kiss with the pain, the hurt, that he was feeling. Knowing that he needed to feel love, needed to feel he was still alive in this world.

Meanwhile....Mitch was having a fitful night. Walking into the room Mac picked him up and sat him in the rocker.

"Hey now little Angel...what is it? Why all the tears?"

Kissing his sons head he continued to rock as Stella came in.

"Is he okay Mac?"

"I'm not sure love. He seems really restless tonight. Maybe we should bring him in with us."

Taking their son into their room they laid him on his tummy between them. While caressing his little back in soft strokes he finally fell back into sleep.

"I wonder how Don's doing Mac? Maybe I should call and check on him."

"I'm sure he's fine love. Jess is with him. If there were any problems she would have called."

"Mac...."

"Mhmmm.."

"How are we all going to get through this? How can we ever feel like a team when one of the family is missing?"

He could see the tears dancing in her eyes. Pulling her closer towards him and Mitch, he passionately kissed her.

"I promise you love. We will all heal together as a family. You have to remember Danny is still with us. He's with us everyday. We keep him alive and warm in our hearts."

Wrapping her tighter they fell into sleep.
 
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With the daylight shinning through the window Mac knew it was going to be another difficult day. Not only was down two CSI's, he was also down Don.

"Adam...I'm going to need to pull you into the field again for a while. Stella's still ML and with Danny gone, I'm down two."

"Umm..sure Mac. Listen...how's Don doing?"

"I'm not sure yet. I haven't spoken to him or Angell this morning. Have you seen Sheldon yet?"

"Yeah...he's in the breakroom. Just give me a call when you need me Mac."

"I will Adam. Thanks."

Walking into the breakroom he found Sheldon writing a note.

"Morning Sheldon...what are you up too?"

"Just writing a small uligy for Don's Memorial."

Nodding that he understood Mac left the room. When he got to his office he noticed an envelope from the EMT's office. Opening it he found Danny's dog tags, badge and wallet. Removing it from the bag he noticed the blood was still wet.

Taking the tags into the washroom he washed them along with the wallet and Danny's badge. As he took the I.D and papers out of the wallet he noticed a small folded paper with Mitch's name on it.

Opening it it read....Mitch...your Uncle Danny here bud. I'm writing this note for you in case anything should happen to me. If it does little buddy I want you to keep my tags safe. These are yours now. Yours to wear and remember your Uncle Danny through your life. Know that I loved you little bud.

Also know that I'm very sorry we never got a chance to play Basket ball, Baseball, Football, all those cool sports that Uncles do. Give me a second little bud...Uncle Danny has to wipe his tears. There we go. Anyways little bud know that you were the light in my every waking day. You were the reason I had to get out of bed, to go to work and keep pushing forward with my life. So thanks for all you've done for your Uncle Danny. Remember without your sweet belly laughs and gurgles I would never know real happiness. Love always your Uncle Danny.

Mac tried to stop his tears, he tried to hold them back but with no luck he couldn't. Laying his head onto the note his heart wretching sobs could be heard throughout the lab.

Meanwhile...

Jess woke with nausea again. Trying to get out of bed she felt the room spin. Running to the washroom she threw up. Waking Don from sleep he walked in to check on her.

"You okay Jess?"

"I don't know Don. I think I may be pregnant."

Don gripped the sink for leverage. In about two seconds he was going to tell Jess to move over.

"Did you....are...."

"Yes Don...I think we're pregnant."

"Ohh...I feel queasy I need to sit down."

Sitting on the tub, Jess laid her head on his knee.

"Are we happy about this Don? Do we have a right to be happy and sad at the same time?"

Caressing Jess's hair he wasn't sure what he felt. For there was still an emptiness missing from his soul. Just one more thing he wouldn't be able to share with his best friend.

Not hearing Don's response she became worried.

"Don....answer me please. Are we happy?"

Lifting Jess's face in his hand, he bent his head and whispered...

"Yes Jess...we should be happy."

Stella was still having trouble with Mitch. She just couldn't get him to settle down. Nothing was making him happy. Seeing the tape on the table she placed it in the VCR and turned it on.

As soon as Uncle Danny came on the screen Mitch flaied his hands and feet in his little chair. Gurgling and giggling as he heard his Uncles voice. Watching her son between her tears she knew Mitch was missing Danny. For it was everyday Danny would stop by. Morning and night to play with Mitch.

It was like clockwork. Seven in the morning, and seven at night. Mitch had gotten into the routine of it. He knew his Uncle hadn't come by for his daily visits. He knew he was missing from his life.

Question now was....how were they going to handle it with someone so young?
 
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When Jess walked into the lab she seen Mac in his office.

"Morning Mac. How's Stella and Mitch?"

"They're doing okay. How are you? You look awful pale this morning."

"I know....Don and I are pregnant."

Mac looked up from the letter. "I'm sorry?"

"Don and I are going to have a baby."

"Aww...congrat's Jess. Where's Don I'd like to congratulate him too."

"He headed over to see Stella and Mitch. Is that....."

"Yeah....the EMT's sent them over this morning."

"Oh my....Danny's tags."

"Mhmm...he left them to Mitch. Along with a letter."

"A letter? Why would he write a good bye letter?"

"I don't think it was a good bye. It was more incase something happened to Danny. He wanted to make sure Mitch had something to remember him by."

"If it's not's being to personal may I read the letter?"

"Sure. Just keep the tissue close by. As it's very sad."

Once Jess read it Mac held her in his arms.

"God Mac....it's almost as if he knew. How do we put someone to rest when it doesn't even feel like they're gone?"

"I know Jess....I keep asking myself the same thing."

Taylor Home

With Mitch asleep in his little rocker Stella turned off the tape.

*Knock, knock.*

"Hi Don. Come on in. Where's Jess?"

"She went into work. I was hoping I could spend some time with Mitch."

"Sure...if you can wait a couple hours. He just fell asleep watching Danny's video. Mitch hasn't been sleeping well..it took me a little while to figure out it was because he was missing Danny."

"You're kidding."

"No...I'm serious. You see Danny would come by every morning at seven and then at night at seven...most time like clock work. I guess Mitch got into the habit of having him here. As soon as I put on the tape this morning...he was out an hour later."

Stella could tell something was bothering Don.

"Are you okay Don? Is it still about Danny?"

"Yeah Stel...but also I found this morning that Jess is pregnant. We're going to have a baby."

"What??? Oh my God....that is wonderful news. You should be happy."

"I'm really trying to be Stel. But I just can't. My heart just isn't ready for it. I mean I haven't even said good bye to Danny yet...and until I do that...I can't move on."

Stella wished they would hurry with the Memorial too. But she also understood the need to wait for Danny's parents.

"I'm sure it will be within the next day Don. Then you will get to say good bye."

Sitting down beside him, they watched Mitch sleep.
 
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