CSI:Miami RT #12 - 'Road To Nowhere'

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Finch

Finch

Funnier in Enochian
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Welcome to the CSI:Miami Road Trip. We're at thread number 12 in the series and this is either because the saga has many more stories ahead of it or I really can't finish anything I start. :p ;)

Summary: The CSI:Miami team travel around the world in their custom-built Hummerhome on loony expeditions. Horatio claims he wants to strengthen the bond of family but judging by the amount of alcohol, Cheez-its and mustard stashed in the closet, the 'family' has other ideas. Of course every now and then, we may find the team back at the lab to solve a few cases by dinner time. This is, afterall, CSI:Miami.

Genre: Satire/Comedy/Action/Drama

Rating: G to PG-13

Characters: Mostly the cast from season 2 but I've added in Ryan and Natalia. Also, some members of TalkCSI have generously allowed me to borrow their names and integrate them into the story as characters. THIS IS NOT AN RPG. Additionally, you'll find various OCs.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. I'm not even wearing my own t-shirt, I think it belongs to my sister. :shifty: Some of the OCs, however are mine. :)

Author's Note: Sorry, the other threads won't be linked to save for the 11th. :/

----------------------------------------------

Now for a small chapter to wet the whistle.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

CSI Garage, 5pm

Horatio: *walks over* What are you doing?

Delko: *slides out from under Hummerhome* Preparing for our fantastic journey into the unknown.

Horatio: I haven't scheduled a road trip in quite some time.

Delko: Exactly. So I took the liberty of scheduling everyone to go on a safari.

Horatio: Oh in Africa, I see.

Delko: No no. *stands, wipes pants* New Jersey.

Horatio: *lifts brow*

Delko: We're going to see them in their natural habitat. Maybe we'll learn something about ourselves in the process. That's what this is all about, right? Exploring new places, learning about new species?

Horatio: I think you're confusing this Hummerhome with a Starship.

Delko: It's a brilliant idea, you have to admit that.

Horatio: Eric, do you know why we don't let you hold the map?

Delko: No.

Horatio: Because whenever we do, no matter what the circumstance, we end up in jail or at the bottom of the sea.

Delko: Oh...then maybe I shouldn't have painted the Hummerhome's new name onto the side.

Horatio: *looks at Hummerhome* ...Titanic.

Delko: *taps chin* I knew I'd heard it somewhere before.

Horatio: *wide-eyed* Is that oil-based paint?

Delko: Yeah.

Horatio: NO! *falls to knees* NOT OIL-BASED PAINT!

Delko: It was either that or crayon.

Horatio: *grabs Eric by the collar*

Delko: AH!

Horatio: Get this graffiti OFF my Hummerhome.

Delko: I think it's rather beautiful.

Horatio: You spelled Titanic wrong.

Delko: *looks up* It doesn't have two Ns?

Horatio: No and it doesn't have a K in it either.

Delko: Huh. *scratches head* I guess that's what happens when you use Wikipedia as the source for all knowledge.

Horatio: Get it off.

Delko: But budget cuts took away our water hose. All I have is a bucket of spit and a half-eaten bologna sandwhich.

Horatio: I'm sure you'll figure something out. *stands* I...*puts on shades* am going to round up the crew. And we...*takes off shades* are going to take a trip....*puts on shades* a road trip....*takes off shades* to the 7 Wonders of the World.

Delko: Okay H, that sunglasses thing is starting to become a nervous twitch.

Horatio: You know, I never used to do this until I started seeing a therapist. I think he hypnotized me or something. At any rate, get this cleaned up.

Delko: ...Do you still see a therapist?

Horatio: Why yes I do. And now I have the uncontrollable urge to KILL everyone with a bad accent and thick moustaches! *cackles*

Delko: *blinks*

Horatio: Oh I meant to ask you. Do you ever find yourself speaking to someone and subtitles just appear to float by as if a monkey on crack found the Photoshop button and said "LET'S MAKE THINGS USELESSLY INTERESTING!"

Delko: ...No.

Horatio: Just me then. *sigh* Okay. Guess I have to take another trip to my therapist. *walks away*

Delko: *steps into Hummerhome*

Inside Hummerhome

Ann Donahinkle is seen ferociously typing on her laptop

Delko: Okay Donahinkle, he found you out. You can stop everything.

Ann: NO. NO! The world must bow to split screens! SPLIT SCREENS!

Delko: But th-

Ann: I'll shoot you in the head again. I will.

Delko: That's not fair. Give someone else a turn.

Ann: ...There are other characters in this show?

Delko: *stares blankly* Wait, what?

Ann: *smiles* How would you like to write a WHOLE episode?

Delko: Really? Me?

Ann: Yep. CSI:pensacola will totally smash everyone in the ratings AND will lend itself more credibility. Now don't worry about guest stars, I got it covered. All I'll need is a black garbage bag, 10 feet of rope and an elephant tranquilizer.

TBC.................................
 
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:guffaw::guffaw:ROFLMAO :guffaw::guffaw:

OMG! I so needed that today. That was absolutely classic...my poor Delko...he is so clueless

Congratulations on the new thread :beer:

Can I go on the hummerhome too please...I need to keep an eye on Eric...:lol:

Thanks for the laugh, I needed it.
 
Congrats on the 12th! Awesome where we find ourselves isn't it? Boy...I remember the first thread like it was yesterday...Good times...*sigh* good times...

H is looser here...I think I like that H...KEEP HIM! :)) He's sure better than the one DC totes around although, last season saw an upswing...But I digress...He's hilarious here... And the whole glasses thing...classic!

HAHAHAHAHAH

All I'll need is a black garbage bag, 10 feet of rope and an elephant tranquilizer.
Click to expand...

Enough said :guffaw:


EXCELLENT update!
 
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Thanks for the reviews! :D

LOL. Love your edit reason, Anni. :lol:

We'll see how it goes, Monica. :p

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Miami, forest, 5:30pm

Lori: *sits Steph on log*

Steph: *holding leg* Momma ma leg hurts.

Lori: I know baby. Let me see. *lifts material*

Steph: *winces*

Lori: Doesn't look too bad. Have you been putting lots of pressure on it?

Steph: *nods*

Lori: Good. We're going to find a highway and then you and I are going to go to the hospital. Okay?

Steph: 'Kay.

Lori: *looks around*

Steph: He hurted you, Momma.

Lori: *looks at Steph*

Steph: *lowers eyes*

Lori: But we got out. And we're going home.

Steph: We don't know where we are, Momma.

Lori: Won't be that hard to find out. *takes Steph's hand* Come on, get on my back.

Steph: *climbs onto Lori's back*

Lori: *wraps arms around Steph's legs, stands*

Hospital, 9pm

Scott: *runs over* Where is she? Did they find her?

Katie: They're both here.

Scott: What happened?

Katie: Lori went to take a phone call and she never came back. I had Dominick all afternoon.

Scott: Did she say what happened?

Katie: No. All she said was 'make sure Steph's okay'. She was shot, by the way but she's alright.

Scott: *nods* Lori's in the room?

Katie: Yeah. And Steph's across the-

Scott: *walks away*

Katie: -hall.

Hospital room

Scott: *walks in, stops*

Lori: *lifts eyes*

Scott: *stares at Lori*

Lori: *buttons up shirt*

Scott: *walks over, hugs Lori*

Lori: *winces*

Scott: *sigh* What happened? *lets go*

Lori: You know how my past is. *places ice on cheek* I pissed off a lot of people.

Scott: Enough to get Stephanie shot?

Lori: *stares at Scott*

Scott: Where were you? Who did this?

Lori: I was in an underground bunker. As to who did it, I don't know.

Scott: You don't know.

Lori: *lowers ice pack* Now you want to interrogate me?

Scott: *nods* Sorry. *sits*

Lori: *throws ice pack onto table*

Scott: How'd you get away?

Lori: I...negotiated my way out.

Scott: How?

Lori: *jumps off bed* You know how men are.

Scott: *looks at Lori* I do?

Lori: *rolls eyes*

Scott: *stands* Lori-

Lori: *leaves*

Scott: *sigh*

TBC...............................
 
Lori...omg...poor lori. I wish she didn't have to negiotate her way out of things. Sheesh, you would think she'd had enough already. How much more can she take? I really feel for her...she's gotta be so disillusioned right now. I hope she can trust Scott better than anyone. Something's telling me she's going to need him now more than ever.

YES! Steph's fine...well, as fine can go...

Awesome update...and there's gotta be more!
 
Yeah the Website finally got fixed! Hoo Ray !!! We have a brand new shine thread ! I will love it forever and call it George! Oh no wait thats Bugs Bunny! Oh Well ! At least Lori got away from Gaven and his cronies! I'm not sure that I liked the way she had to do it but at least shes still alive! I have a feeling theres gonna be a man hunt and some revenge in store ! Look out Loris about to go nija on Gavens ass!

I hope Scott Doesn't get al pissed at her negotiation tack ticks !

Great update Geni!
 
Awesome update Geni!

Glad Stephie is ok...

Can't wait to read more...

I'll stowaway on the hummerhome if I have too...LOL
 
Thanks for the reviews! :D

^ Hehehe. :devil: Wouldn't that be a surprise for the gang. Didn't they have Stetler stow away once? Or was he following behind them on a pink tricycle? :lol:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gables Estates, house, bedroom, 12am

Lori: *shuts drapes* ...*opens drapes*

Scott: *opens eyes*

Lori: *sits on bench*

Scott: *looks at Lori*

Lori: *stands, opens window*

Scott: *sits up* Something wrong?

Lori: Go back to bed.

Scott: I wish I could but you're running around like a headless chicken.

Lori: *closes window*

Scott: *stands*

Lori: *rips drapes closed*

Scott: *walks over* Are you okay?

Lori: *crosses arms* I'm fine.

Scott: *stares at Lori*

Lori: *uncrosses arms, scratches head*

Scott: You seem...fidgety.

Lori: I-I can't sleep.

Scott: *nods*

Lori: Don't you have something in the medicine cabinet I can use?

Scott: No.

Lori: *lifts brow*

Scott: Not for you, anyway.

Lori: Come on, it wouldn't hurt.

Scott: It'll hurt you.

Lori: *rolls eyes*

Scott: Why don't you lie down. *takes Lori's hand*

Lori: *shakes head*

Scott: *steps closer* Let's go.

Lori: If I do, will you get me something to help me sleep?

Scott: No.

Lori: *frowns*

Scott: I know what happened to you and I know you were only doing it to save Stephanie.

Lori: *frowning, lifts eyes*

Scott: It was a tough situation.

Lori: *lowers head*

Scott: *wraps arm around Lori*

Lori: *lies head on Scott's chest, starts to cry*

Scott: *sigh*

Lori: *crying* I d-didn't want to-

Scott: I know.

Lori: I thought they w-were goin' to kill her.

Scott: You did what you had to.

Lori: *grabs Scott's shirt* There h-had to be a better way.

Scott: Stephanie's safe. You're safe. That's all that matters.

Lori: *shakes head*

Scott: *kisses Lori's head* I love you.

Lori: *sniffs*

Scott: Let's get some rest, okay?

Lori: *nods*

Scott: *takes Lori's hand, walks over to bed*

Lori: *lies down*

Scott: *sits*

Lori: *grabs Scott's arm* Closer.

Scott: *lies down*

Lori: *wipes eyes*

Scott: *places thumb on Lori's cheek*

Lori: *closes eyes*

Miami Lab, 1am

Speed: *staring into microscope*

Katie: *walks over* Uh, hi. You're supposed to be at home.

Speed: Busy.

Katie: *takes microscope*

Speed: *lifts head*

Katie: How about we try...working on the day shift. Which you are on. Remember?

Speed: I have to get this finished.

Katie: You have to get sleep. *looks down at folder*

Speed: *shuts folder*

Katie: *lifts eyes* You're not supposed to be on Lori's case.

Speed: I'm just...taking a look.

Katie: *crosses arms*

Speed: *steps back, places hands on hips* It's a fiber that was collected from *angry sigh* Stephanie's pants.

Katie: If you're caught looking at this, the whole case could be thrown out.

Speed: I'll put it back.

Katie: *stares at Speed*

Speed: I just...borrowed it.

Katie: Put it away right now.

Speed: I found out something interesting.

Katie: I don't want to know.

Speed: It's a synthetic fiber used for durable materials like carpets and seat coverings.

Katie: So?

Speed: So it's transfer.

Katie: *sigh* Tim, I know you want to help but-

Speed: They transported Steph in the back seat of a car and with a little more time and testing, I can figure out the model. It'll narrow things down.

Katie: *places hand on Speed's arm* It doesn't matter what you find out, you're going to see what you want to see and that's the reason you're not on this case. You need to stop.

Speed: *looks down at table*

Katie: Another CSI will find the answers.

Speed: *nods*

Katie: Pack it up and let it go.

Speed: *looks at Katie*

Katie: I'll take you home.

Speed: *pulls off gloves*

TBC....................................
 
oh awww... The Speedle/ Finch family's pulling together. That's such a great thing. I love how MATURE Katie is being...I know...right? But this is the one time that it's warranted. I feel Speed's pain- he wants to find out who did this,no matter what the outcome is. His granddaughter and his daughter were taken, and brutalized. He wants answers. And I think he's going to get them in his own way. Scott's so understanding, and so loving...Lori definetly needs him in her corner.

Such a great picture of family coming together in a crisis... Awesome work!
 
Aww Poor Lori! She did what she had to to save them ! At least Scott is an understanding husband! But it does make you wonder whats going through his head at a time like this!

I guess we know what going through Speeds head! He wants to find who did this to his family even if he risks blowing the whole case! well at least a small voice of reason has stepped in ! notice i said a Small voice of Reason!

Great update Geni!
 
Awww...Speed...he wants to find who ever hurt his grandbaby...I love him

Poor Lori, she feels so guilty.

Great update Geni! Can't wait to read more
 
Thanks so much for the reviews. :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Coral Gables, street, 2am

Katie: *turns key*

Speed: Thanks.

Katie: It's no problem.

Speed: I guess I just want to be there for them, you know?

Katie: *nods*

Speed: They don't deserve to go through that.

Katie: *takes Speed's hand* You can go see Lori tomorrow. As a father, not as a CSI. That's what she needs.

Speed: *nods*

Katie: *reaches over* Goodnight, Tim. *kisses Speed's cheek*

Speed: *leans closer*

Katie: *looks at Speed*

Speed: *kisses Katie*

Katie: *blinks, pulls head away*

Speed: *looks at Katie*

Katie: *stares at Speed*

Speed: ...You want to come inside?

Katie: ...

Speed: *stares at Katie*

Katie: I think I'd like that.

Speed: *smirks*

Miami PD, interview room, 9am

Scott: Have a seat.

Steph: *jumps into chair* Am I in trouble, Daddy?

Scott: *smiles, sits* No, you're not in trouble. The Lieutenant just wants to ask you some questions.

Steph: *nods*

Horatio: *pulls chair over, sits* Welcome.

Steph: Hi.

Horatio: How are you feeling?

Steph: Good.

Horatio: Well that's good. I'd like to ask you some questions about what happened the other day, would that be okay?

Steph: *nods*

Horatio: What can you tell me about the room you were in?

Steph: It was cold.

Horatio: Cold.

Steph: Yup. And dark. There was um...one light. It was hangy.

Horatio: *nods*

Steph: The walls were cold too. Metal.

Horatio: Metal walls.

Steph: Mhm. *grabs glass, drinks water*

Horatio: What about before you got to the dark room? Where were you before you were there?

Steph: School.

Horatio: You were at school. How did you get from school to the dark room?

Steph: A man took me.

Horatio: What did this man look like?

Steph: Tall. *points to Scott* Daddy tall.

Horatio: *looks at Scott*

Scott: *stares at Steph*

Horatio: What else? What about his face?

Steph: He had glasses. *picks up Horatio's shades* Like these. *puts shades on*

Horatio: Sunglasses.

Steph: *nods*

Shades slip off Steph's face

Steph: He smelled like Tommy.

Horatio: ...Like Tommy.

Steph: *nods* Smokey.

Horatio: He smelled like smoke, okay.

Steph: Yup. But he wasn't nice like Tommy.

Horatio: *nods*

Steph: He took me into a car.

Horatio: Okay, do you remember what color the car was?

Steph: *shakes head* He put a bag on ma head. I couldn't see nothin'.

Horatio: So how did you know it was a car?

Steph: He bended down to get me inside. And the ground sounded real close to the floor. Momma always tells me to use all my senses. Y'know, yer ears *points to ears* and yer eyes *points to eyes* and yer NOSE too.

Horatio: *smirks*

Outside interview room, 1 hour later

Horatio: *shuts door*

Scott: What do you think?

Horatio: Well it's a start but I would prefer Lori's statement.

Scott: She won't even tell me anything and I don't want to push her.

Horatio: I understand that but without much physical evidence, it's important that the victims can tell us everything they remember.

Scott: ...I think she knew the guys. Or, at least one of them.

Horatio: Have any idea who?

Scott: *shakes head* Sorry.

Horatio: Okay. We'll call you if we need anything else.

Scott: Sure.

TBC............................
 
Stephie was such the TROOPER! She really does rock...just like her mother! She's so smart, and observant...YOu just gotta love the little tyke! She's going to be just fine.
Poor Lori though, still not talking about her ordeal. I see that she's going to experience some difficulties in getting through this... First seat on the loony bin train coming right up...

Speed and Katie..>FINALLY... Enuf said.

Awesome update!
 
OOO! Tra la la boom di a Speeds gonna get him some today ! lol! its about time him and Katie got itt together ! now if he can manage to pull himself together for his kids he'll be fine!

Yeah ! Steph was such a good girl tellin uncle H. all about what she remembered! I have a feeling Lori is gonna be the lone Ranger on this caper! Unless she desides to drag her father into as she usually does! lol!

Why does some of this have the familiar Smell ! What is that scent I've smelled it before recently ! Oh yeah ! i know what it is ! Is that Stupid old Fart Judge Finch and his drunk ass wife ! Thats the smell!

Great update Geni!
 
Thanks so much for the reviews! :D

:lol: Flash.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gables Estates, house, 11am

Lori: *runs over to door, opens it*

Speed: *smiles* Hi.

Lori: *stares at Speed*

Speed: *steps in, hugs Lori*

Lori: *lifts brow* ...You got laid.

Speed: *lets go*

Lori: *looks at Speed*

Speed: *frowns* Hi Dad, how are you? Gee Lori, I'm fine.

Lori: *smirks, walks away*

Speed: *shuts door*

Kitchen

Speed: *walks over* Where's Steph?

Lori: *wipes table* She's with Scott, he's taking her out for ice cream.

Speed: *nods*

Lori: So who was it?

Speed: Hm?

Lori: *smiles* Your lady friend.

Speed: *frowns*

Lori: *stands straight* Well?

Speed: ...Katie.

Lori: *lifts brows* ...My mother Katie?

Speed: *places hands in pockets* Yeah.

Lori: Huh. And she was sober.

Speed: Lori...

Lori: *smiling*

Speed: *angry sigh*

Lori: I thought you two were working things out, not getting a workout.

Speed: I-

Katie: *runs in* Oh good, you're home. Okay. I have t-...*looks at Speed*

Speed: *looks at Katie*

Katie: *smiles* Tim.

Speed: *smirks*

Lori: *crosses arms*

Katie: *blinks* Oh right. *looks at Lori* I was going to take Dom to the pier, you have him ready?

Lori: Yeah. Just don't drop him off into the ocean. I wouldn't want my only son to float off to Colombia.

Speed: *looks at Lori*

Lori: *walks away*

Katie: *smiles* You want to come to the pier?

Speed: Why are you going to the pier?

Katie: Lunch.

Speed: By yourself.

Katie: I'm not going to be by myself, I'm going to be with my grandson.

Lori: *walks over* Here you go. *hands baby to Katie*

Katie: *wraps arm around baby* Ah there you are, you handsome little man.

Lori: *slams large bag onto table*

Katie: *looks at bag*

Lori: Diapers, wipes, milk, toys, spare clothes, the kitchen sink, everything you need.

Katie: *stares at bag*

Lori: *smiles* I sure hope you guys used protection last night.

Katie: *looks at Lori*

Speed: *scratches head*

Katie: *looks at Speed* You told her?

Speed: Not exactly.

Katie: *sigh* Well I'm going to take off. See you tonight?

Speed: Sure.

Katie: *kisses Speed, grabs bag, leaves*

Speed: *looks back*

Lori: Why are you here?

Speed: *looks at Lori* I wanted to see you. Make sure you're okay.

Lori: *nods*

Speed: It's been a long time since I've seen your face like that.

Lori: Yeah well...at least it wasn't Scott's handiwork.

Speed: Whose was it?

Lori: Don't know.

Speed: You're lying.

Lori: *stares at Speed*

Speed: *narrows eyes* You're going to take care of it on your own. Aren't you.

Lori: I don't know what you're talking about.

Speed: You can't administer justice, it's not up to you.

Lori: *shrugs* I'm just a housewife.

Speed: We both know that's not true.

Lori: *smirks*

Scott: *walks in* Hey! We're home!

Speed: *looks back*

Steph: *runs over* MOMMA! *hugs Lori's leg*

Lori: *smiles* Hey baby.

Steph: Daddy got me a BIG ice cream cone!

Lori: Is that right.

Scott: *walks over* And Daddy finished it for her.

Steph: *smiling* It was real big.

Lori: *laughs* Yeah I can see the trail it left all over your face. *looks at Scott, mumbles* I hope it's not all over my truck.

Scott: *shakes head*

Lori: Why don't we get you cleaned up. *picks up Steph, walks away*

Scott: *sits at table, pulls laptop over*

Speed: She's going to find him, Scott.

Scott: *lifts eyes*

Speed: Do you realize what she's capable of?

Scott: *looks back at laptop*

Speed: Scott.

Scott: It was good of you to stop by, we appreciate it.

Speed: *stares at Scott*

TBC..................................
 
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