The Dating Game “Good evening ladies and gentlemen, I’m Edward Pellew and I’m your overenthusiastic host tonight on the Dating Game! Let’s meet our lucky contestant! He’s one of the finest Detectives I’ve ever seen, please welcome, Horatio to our stage!” Gangly, shy, awkward Horatio walks out on stage and takes the victim’s chair. “Hello Horatio, are you ready to play the Dating Game?!” “Sir, I really would rather not. Could I go? “No! We are going to bring out our lovely contestants now!” We are to reveal three contestants, Calleigh Duquesne , Natalia Boa Vista and the current Queen of England. “Contestant number one enjoys Bullets and Guns, and doting affections on those she loves. Please welcome Calleigh Duquesne from Miami!” Audience cheers. “Contestant number two enjoys working, and DNA, please welcome Natalia Boa Vista from Miami!” Audience cheers. “And contestant number three enjoys walks in the royal garden, waving to her subjects while she spends their money and wearing the Crown jewels, please welcome Queen Elisabeth the Second of England.” Audience cheers, a little confused. “Now, let’s begin our game. Horatio you will now ask each contestant the questions on those cards.” “Sir, I would rather not.” “You will.” “If you say so sir.” “Contestant number one, what is your best attribute?” Calleigh grins, “I would have to say my job as a CSI.” “Sir-“ “Continue Horatio.” Pellew gives him the evil eye. “Number two, why are you here?” “this is just where I ended up.” “Ask her a question Horatio.” “Where would you take me on a date? Sir I really must protest.” “Answer her question.” “The Lab, I suppose, I see you there everyday anyway.” “Continue Horatio.” “Number three, tell me how you would help me relax after a long day at work.” “I would have the butler draw you up a bath and the maid massage you afterwards as she fed you jams on biscuits.” “Well that’s all the time we have for today. Pick a contestant Horatio and we will send you to an all expense paid dinner at Larry’s Lobster Shack in Miami.” “That’s it, I don’t get to ask them more questions.” “Nope. That’s it. You shouldn’t have complained so much in the beginning, you could have asked more questions then.” “I refuse to pick a date from a selection which includes two woman, and the Queen of England.” “Tough luck. Actually, you have to marry one of them.” “Sir I really must protest.” “Oh well, come on, pick already.” “I suppose I will have to pick the bullet girl Calleigh.” “What an excellent choice! Ladies and Gentlemen join us next week when we meet our newest victim. Thank you and goodnight.” Horatio is lead(dragged) off stage by a giggling, ecstatic Calleigh, followed by a grim face Natalia and a clueless Queen The End