update anyone?
The days passed quickly. Catherine set up an appointment to confirm which man was Lindsey’s father. Gil cancelled their breakfast because he was working over, never bothering to set a new date. He just confirmed their appointment with the doctor. They weren’t consciously avoiding each other but they didn’t seek each other out. The nature of their new cases kept them from working together.
Thursday morning they both left work early for their appointment, each in their own vehicle. They waited in an unnatural silence in the lobby of the clinic. When they were called back they were greeted by a man who looked younger than Greg Sanders.
“Hi. I’m Dr. Everett. Please sit down.” Catherine and Gil obliged. Dr. Everett observed their defensive body language before continuing. I see we are here for a paternity test for…” he looked at Catherine, “…your daughter. Is she not here with you?”
“No. We don’t want her to know about this yet.”
“Well, it is hard to do this without a proper…” Catherine pulled a swab and a vial of blood from her purse and handed it to him, “…sample.” He took the items from her. “While I appreciate your enthusiasm, we need to make sure this is done properly.”
“I work for the Las Vegas Crime Lab and I am a trained medical technician. The sample was done properly.”
“Ah, I see. Do you have samples for yourselves?”
“No.” Gil spoke for the first time.
“OK. We’ll get that taken care of shortly. I’m going to need a little background information.” He looked at the file. “I see your daughter is thirteen. Usually we run these tests for parents of young children. What prompted you to do this?”
Catherine explained the situation, including the study that Wendy was doing.
“Mr. Grissom, it says here you also work for the same employer.” The doctor shuffled through his patient history forms.
“Yes.”
“So I’m assuming you both are in the system?”
“Yes.” Dr. Everett wondered if this man ever said more than one word.
“You could have your results much faster if you just used your lab.” He took his glasses off as he spoke.
“This is personal.” Catherine knew better than to suggest using the office lab after Gil’s reaction to her having Greg run her DNA against Sam Braun’s.
“Did you not suspect Mr. Grissom could be your daughter’s father?”
“There was no reason to think he was her father…” Dr. Everett cut her off.
“I disagree. If there was no reason you wouldn’t be here now.” He looked at both of them. Gil flashed a look of anger at Catherine, which was not missed by her or the doctor.
“Gil, I’ve already told you that Eddie and I didn’t have sex till after I had cycled.” She then looked at the doctor. “It’s that simple. I had a period, the universal sign for not pregnant. We’re doing this here because our lab has messed up samples somewhere.”
“Miss Willows, did you spot any during your pregnancy?”
“A little, yes.”
“Was it limited to the first trimester or did it continue throughout your pregnancy?” He checked off a box on his paperwork. Catherine thought for a moment before answering.
“Throughout my pregnancy.” She wondered where he was going with his questions.
“Have you had any other pregnancies?”
“No.” Gil spoke.
“Um, yes. One.” Her voice was low and reserved. Gil looked at her in disbelief.
“I had a miscarriage at 10 weeks.”
“During that time did you spot at all?” The doctor looked up from his paperwork.
“Actually, I didn’t know I was pregnant until I had the miscarriage.”
“So you were bleeding during the pregnancy?”
“Yes. I don’t see what this has to do with a DNA test.”
“Most women who are pregnant find out because they were late. This applies to both wanted and unwanted pregnancies. However, there is a percentage of women who actually continue to bleed for part or even all of their pregnancy. I believe you are one of these women. As for the paternity of your daughter, we’ll have to wait on the results to come in, approximately two weeks.
“I didn’t know you’d had a miscarriage.” The two of them left Dr. Everett’s office together. Gil walked Catherine to her car.
“It was a long time ago.” She opened the door. “I need to go if I’m going to get any sleep before I need to pick up Lindsey.” She started the engine and pulled away leaving Gil standing alone in the parking lot.
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“How was school?” A very sleepy Catherine picked Lindsey up from school. She’d managed to get almost two hours sleep.
“Great. I busted my knee when I fell down the stairs, tripped and spilled spaghetti on my clothes at lunch and I failed PE.” Her delivery was dry.
“Failed PE?” Lindsey cut her mother off before she could finish.
“Oh and I have detention for a week and you have a parent-teacher conference on Monday.”
“Lindsey!” Catherine was too tired to deal with another discipline issue right now.
“It was just a little PDA.”
“What?”
“Public Display of Affection.”
“I know what it means. What were you caught doing?”
“It was just kissing Sean.”
“Between classes?”
“Well it started between lunch and music.”
“Started?”
“We only frenched a little.”
“You are so grounded again.”
“And he did feel me up.”
“What?”
“Oh please. That’s when Mr. Carradine busted us in the bathroom.”
“What were you doing in the bathroom?”
“We were in a stall.”
“Oh my God.”
“Don’t worry. I had my clothes on.” Catherine relaxed just a bit.
“Sean was missing his pants though.” Lindsey rubbed at a stain on her shirt. “Mom does this stuff come out?”
Catherine slammed on the brakes and turned to confront her daughter only to see her laughing like a madwoman.
“I’m kidding. I wouldn’t do that. Besides Sean’s face is covered with acne and he has braces.”
“Then?” Catherine’s face was red and puffy with anger.
“I’m failing PE. I just wanted to put things in their proper perspective.”
“Well, you are still grounded.” She pulled back into traffic. “How can you fail PE?”
“I suck at volleyball.”
“Lindsey.”
“Well, I do.” It was the truth, no point in lying about it. They made their way home. Catherine prepared a snack for her daughter and headed back to bed.
Three hours later Lindsey went to her mother’s room to wake her. She snickered when she saw the pillow on the floor. Her mom had some sort of grudge against pillows. More often than not when Lindsey came to wake her mother up she would find a pillow lying somewhere in the floor.
She picked up the pillow, put it back in the bed and then crawled in. She giggled as she watched her mother. It didn’t matter where Lindsey crawled into the bed because within minutes Catherine would be moving towards her in her sleep. Lindsey remembered how when she was little she and her dad would play a game. Lindsey would get in bed and they’d let Catherine snuggle up to her. Then Lindsey would squirm out of her grasp and go the other side of the bed and wait on her mom to follow. Eddie used to tell Lindsey that she was her mother’s snugglebug. He would talk about how before she was born Catherine slept like a log. And how after she found out she was pregnant she started abusing pillows in her sleep. He told Lindsey that Catherine had even pushed him out of the bed on several occasions. Then after she was born her mother would rest contentedly whenever Lindsey was in her arms. Every time he told her the story, every time they played their game Lindsey felt as if she were the most important and most loved person in the world.
She felt her mother’s arms wrap around her and she sighed. They were having so many problems and sometimes Lindsey just hated her mother. And sometimes, in spite of what she said and did, she just wanted to be held in her mother’s arms and know how much she was loved. So on those days she would go to Catherine’s room early so that she could snuggle without her mom knowing she needed it. Today was definitely one of those days. Truth be told it was one of those weeks.
She knew her mom dated but she’d never had anyone stay overnight before. The fact that it was Gil made it even worse. Lindsey loved Gil. He was like an uncle to her but her dad had always told Lindsey that her mom and Gil had a thing and that was the reason why Catherine had left him. So even though Lindsey loved Gil she didn’t want him with her mother.
Lindsey snuggled in a little closer to her mother and whispered, “I love you Mom.” Catherine heard her and opened her eyes.
“Hey baby” she said groggily. “This is my favorite way to wake up.” She kissed her daughter softly on her forehead before closing her eyes again.
“Mine too.”
“I miss this. When you were little you woke me up like this all the time.” Her eyes were still closed as she pulled Lindsey to her.
“I’m not a baby anymore.” Lindsey moved slightly as if to get away from her mother’s grasp, but not enough for Catherine to let go.
“I know but I still miss it.” They lay there for several minutes just enjoying each other’s company.
“Mom.”
“Yeah baby.”
“Did Daddy hit you all the time?”
“What?” Catherine’s eyes opened wide at her daughter’s question.
“It’s just…I remember things but they are really vague.”
“No baby. We fought a lot. We’d shove each other sometimes but he only hit me a few times.”
“Why do I remember your screaming and the bruises on your body?”
“I think you are remembering two different things, honey. Your dad and I had this huge fight and things got out of control. He threw punches. I threw punches back at him. We didn’t realize you were watching until after it was over. How on earth can you remember that? You couldn’t have been more than three when it happened.”
“I remember it. I was standing over there and I saw it.” She pointed to the doorway of Catherine’s bedroom.
“Oh, Lindsey. I’m so sorry.” She lowered her head, ashamed that she and Eddie had exposed her daughter to their fighting.
“What about the screaming I used to hear when I was in bed?” Catherine blushed a bright crimson.
“We weren’t fighting I promise.” A small laugh escape despite her attempts to keep it inside.
“Oh that’s gross.” Lindsey pulled away from her mom.
“I’m glad to hear you say that but trust me when I tell you that you’ll change your mind in the next few years.”
“Not THAT! I was talking about you and Daddy.” Catherine let the laughter flow at her daughter’s reaction.
“Well, Lindsey you weren’t dropped off by the stork.”
“Stop. Stop. Stop.” Lindsey covered her ears. The idea that her parents ever…EW! “Lalalalalalalalalalala! I’m not listening.” Lindsey eventually uncovered her ears and the laughter died down.
“Baby, is that memory the reason you though Gil hit me?”
“You and Daddy would lay on the couch like that when you were fighting.”
“I guess we thought you were too little to notice.”
“But I did.” Her voice was full of hurt and confusion. She still didn’t understand her parents’ relationship. She never would. She loved them both and they loved her. Why they couldn’t love each other was beyond her comprehension.
“Look at me. Not everyone relationship is like the one your father and I shared. Life isn’t perfect. People aren’t perfect. Sometimes we hurt the ones we love without meaning to. Sometimes we strike out with our hands. Sometimes it is with our words. It doesn’t make it right but it happens.”
“Is that why you and Daddy got a divorce?”
“Part of it. It’s complicated.” She brushed her fingers through her daughter’s hair. “Love isn’t easy sweetie. Television and movies make it seem like once you declare your love for someone that life will be perfect. It isn’t. Your father could make me feel beautiful. He could make me feel needed and loved, but he could also make me feel like a complete failure. And I probably made him feel the same way.” A wistful smile made its way to Catherine’s face. She had never said this aloud to anyone.
“You know you are my world.” Lindsey rolled her eyes in disgust at her mother. However, inside she was beaming. No matter what, she loved her mother more than she would ever let her know. And moments like this would remain as precious memories for the rest of her life.