Everything begins with a thought (Gil/Lady Heather)

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So it's my first fic here. Feel free to comment, critisize and everything else:) Hope you like it. Sorry for mistakes.:)



Everything begins with a thought

This story takes place approximately 7 months after Zoe‘s death.


Las Vegas was always known as probably the nosiest city in whole world. And it is true. It doesn‘t really matter if it is day or night.
Although the most famous fetish club was in a quite silent area, it never fell asleep. Men and women, screams, whips, chains- and no silence. Of course the days in this club were much calmer, but to say that there were no clients who liked to enjoy the provided pleasures during daytime- that would simply be a lie.
This night was just as any other. Screams- pleasure or pain- Rammstein- all noises that are necessary for a good fetish club. But in the higher floor, in the workroom, a beautiful, green-eyed brunette was sitting behind a large, antiquarian oak table. Her face was calm, various contracts on the table and in her hands, but it had been obvious that her mind was somewhere far from them…She was the owner… Lady Heather.

(Lady Heather’s POV)

“It finally feels as always. I guess I will always feel at least a little bit of pain because of Zoe’s death, she was my daughter after all. I wouldn’t be normal if I didn’t feel anything. The thing that I feel stronger than anything now is gratitude for my mother. She was the one who came when Zoe was killed. She understood me, didn’t even offer to go to her house or somewhere else. She knew how destroyed I felt, and understood that the only place where I could regain my power was my dominion. A place where nothing ever happens without my knowledge. A place where I have the power no matter what. Of course, at first I didn’t hold any sessions. It wasn’t safe neither for me nor the clients. But one evening, about a week after Zoe’s funeral, my mother told me:” It is a very bad and not fair thing when children die before their parents. We both understand that. But Heather, honey, Zoe died- not you. Nothing, nobody will ever fill the gap which you feel inside, but that doesn’t mean that your life ended. There are thousands of mothers who lose their children when they’re only babies, and Zoe was already a woman. You gave life to her, you grew her, you had a chance to see her as a gown person. I know that this doesn’t really make you feel any better, but you have to except the truth. Your daughter is dead and you can’t change absolutely anything. Life goes on.”. I guess her words woke me from mourning trance. Step by step I started running my dominion again. Few months passed, I started having personal sessions again. As far as I can tell, clients didn’t notice any difference in me. Of course, my employees still give me strange looks. I don’t judge them. I know that their trust will come back. They just need time. The only person who didn’t act around me differently is Lauren. And I’m not surprised. I have my dominion for almost 12 years now, and she worked for me from the beginning. A professional dominatrix. Every time I can’t handle my personal clients I send them to Lauren. Sometimes I even doubt which one of us is better. Maybe because of that I am higher than her just as her boss. I mean, everybody in this dominion sees me not just as their boss, but as their mistress as well. But with Lauren it is different. We are equal and that I really like about her. Because of that- I can trust her. She was the one who started running my dominion when I was mourning for Zoe. She did it without me even asking her. She understood me… When I felt strong enough to “come back” I thanked her, she simply smiled to me and that was it. My mother once asked me if I’m not afraid that she can try to take over my dominion. And that is not as stupid as it may sound. Long time ago I even asked Lauren why doesn’t she start her own fetish club. She is a perfect dominatrix, smart enough to run her own business. She simply smiled at me and said: “I may be smart enough, and I love working as a dominatrix, but I HATE paperwork.” And it was true. It is obvious that she loves her job the way that it is now. And the thing that I love about her the most is that she never asks me anything. I can still remember that night when Gil Grissom came to talk about my two dead employees and didn’t leave before the morning. Lauren was the one who stopped the gossips by simply telling everyone that Dr. Grissom had already left… I can still remember that night so clearly… I surprised even myself. I don’t give into guys so easily. I’ve burned in the past just enough to understand that it is simply not worth risking. But with him it was different. I guess HE was different. I mean, it took him only one touch, only one look- and I was his. It was one of the most wonderful nights of my life. Yes, he was a little tensed, but I wasn’t the most relaxed ever either. But he was so open for me, so sincere. I could feel him, his desires, his feeling in his every move, every touch, every kiss. I did see his wishes. I knew what he wanted. But I was pleasantly surprised when he gave me just about everything that I wanted. He fulfilled all desires that I had without even a word. That’s why he was so different. He knew exactly what I wanted. And he knew how to give it to me. Even more surprised I felt when he stayed for the night. I believed that a man as reserved as he was should leave me, and go home for the rest of the night, or even go back to work. But he stayed…Only when I woke up I understood how much I missed man’s arms around me in the morning. It felt safe, good. Almost too good. And I was right. During the morning tea he simply hurt me. Not only because he didn’t trust me after the night we spent together, but because he didn’t explain everything to me. Now, after all this time passed I understand that he didn’t really have other choice. But why didn’t he simply tell me what he had to do? Why did he have to look ant me, talk to me in his “professional way”, like I was one of his suspects? As I said earlier, he is an extremely reserved man. He felt that his walls were coming down and got scared. Or at least that is the way that I try to comfort myself…





Across the town, the supervisor of nightshift, Gil Grissom was driving his car to the morgue. He had just finished processing the scene and now needed all possible information about the victim. It was a hard case. Third women found dead under the same circumstances.


(Gil Grissom’ POV)

“Another maniac- that is all Las Vegas needs. I’m tired of this kind of things. It is bad enough when children get killed, women get raped, but it is necessary from time to time to throw in a maniac. The last victim- she looked so young. No more than 20. And she looked very familiar. Maybe I have met her earlier? But I would have remembered that… But her face, her hair… Sara’s reaction surprised me. I always believed that she is quite open-minded person, but tonight I was proved wrong. This girl (It’s hard to even call her a woman), she was dress in leather clothes. From top to toe. And Sara’s first thoughts were that she’s either a prostitute or “some kind of gothic maniac”. Her thinking disappointed me. But on the other hand nobody is perfect, and that’s simply her opinion. I shouldn’t think about this kind of things so much. Especially now, I should find beautiful things about her instead of noticing bad ones. I mean, we have been dating for almost 6 months now. And that is a quite long time. She seems so happy, I guess I’m too. It is nice when you have someone to go to after a hard day. But one thing really bugs me. It has been some time now that she started saying “I love you”. I always answer her the same, but one evening as I said so, I caught myself thinking-“really?”. And from that moment I can’t stop. The need to hide this relationship doesn’t really help. But still, as I said we have been together for almost 6 months… Somehow I feel guilty. I’m not even sure why. I know that she loves me. Her love is deep and at some point even obsessive. But with her I’m safe. I understand it’s very bad to talk this way of a woman that you have an affair with, but she simply doesn’t know me. Well she knows the “Grissom”. She doesn’t know the real person inside. Because this is the way Sara is. She sees how I act in work, around her and that is it. It is enough for her. It is enough for most people. I guess that’s way I feel guilt. I don’t “love” Sara. I do feel something, but I don’t think of it as love. It’s more something like safety. With her I’m safe. She doesn’t want to look inside of me. With her it is simple and safe… I can still remember Heather. That day when we sat in her balcony, drinking tea. She told me my biggest fear. We had met only few times for few minutes and she already knew more about me that my friends. It scared me, but I felt so amazed that it is hard to even tell. But then, once again we met. And again in few moments she found out the thing I had been hiding the most. Her ability to see me through, her ability to understand… I know that it’s part of her job, but it still fascinates me. And it did then. In her dominion, I’ve spend the most amazing night of my life. She was so gentle, subtle, and at the same time- strong, powerful and demanding. For that night, for only one night I knew- I was hers completely. But she was mine too… In the morning after, I’m not really sure what happened. She told me that she had diabetes I knew what I had to do. I had to choose. An amazing woman who knew me better than anybody else or the possibility of compromising the investigation. I was quite sure that keeping the case clean and Heather not hurt- wasn’t quite possible. And I chose. Maybe the thought of her knowing me scared me? I understand that now I’m just trying to excuse my actions. And that shows the obvious. I feel sorry for my decision, I regret it… I needed to tell her I‘d been sorry. At least try to do that. Not so much for her, more for myself. So I could tell myself I tried. I knew she wouldn’t forgive me. But her cold tone and empty eyes simply finished me of. I sound like a soap opera character, but it’s true. That moment I knew, I’ve lost the best chance I’ve ever had, and ever will… Then we met on circumstances that I’ve never even imagined. Her daughter was dead and all could do was tell her to keep a distance from man who probably killed her. One of those times when I feel weaker than I should be…She was on my mind all the time. I think Catherine noticed it. I’m thankful for not saying anything to me… It felt so good to listen to her in the parking-lot. She was speaking to me as nothing had ever happened. Her words were filled with love for her daughter. And then she handed me the condom. I felt something that I shouldn’t have. I felt pain. That is how I found out that I still had feelings for her. I wasn’t even sure what should I say to her. When suddenly it occurred to me, the man that she “did” was actually dead… When I’d found that cross something turned in me. Even now I’m not sure what was I scared of-Heather being in danger or Heather doing something stupid? I had found her in the desert. I knew I had to stop her, but all that pain in her eyes, in her voice… The least I could do was processing her. I simply didn’t want a stranger around her when she was in that kind of state. Once again Catherine understood me, but Brass looked very, very strange. I would even say suspicious. Heather was in shock, her eyes were completely empty. Because of her realizing that she can’t bring her daughter back, or because of realizing what she had almost done? It wasn’t really the most important thing at the time. I processed her, few hours after she was released. I fought the temptation to take her home, to comfort her, I realized that her daughter’s death was quite enough to deal with. She didn’t really need another trouble- a guilty man from her past…
 
Thanks, but something strange happened. I guess I didn't copy the ending of the story.:) So here it is. The original endeng of Grissoms POV.


And now I’m with Sara. She is so different than Heather. But who knows. Maybe eventually I WILL be happy with Sara. Maybe I will marry her and live happily ever after? But there will always be the age difference and my doubt. I just hope that I’m not making a big mistake. I truthfully hope…


I'm not sure, I'm thinking about second chapter, but as I said I'm not sure yet, so I can't promise you anything:)
 
Ok, I know that with this chapter I'm going "deeper" than I planed...But I just find it fun writing this so..:)
(I will remind you that Grissom was on his way to the morgue:))


Chapter 2


(In the morgue)


Catherine was standing over the dead body, waiting for Grissom.
“You could have started with out me, you know. I wouldn’t take it personally” Grissom finally arrived and now was smiling.
“What am I seeing? Are you in a good mood? Doc. You should really check him up. I think something is wrong” Catherine answered teasing. Grissom just smiled and gave her a shy look.
”You know Gil, she’s right. This kind of case usually would really get to you.”
”And I thought we’re here for the victim-not me” said Grissom with a serious look “ Al, tell me everything”.
And Doc. started “Well, she’s around 24, we’re not sure though. We don’t have her ID. Cause of death- single shot to her head. I’ve sent the bullet to Bobby, but there are few quite strange things about her. Gil, Catherine, look at her. What do you see? Her hair is dyed, but not “weak”. It means her dye is expensive. I found various jewelry on her, all looked quite pricey, her make up is exclusive. But her body…Look.” Coroner rolled her over. There were small, almost invisible scars all over her upper back.
“They all are few years old. The only thing fresh is the marks around her wrists. I’m not hundred percent sure, but I think they were made with handcuffs. And they look exactly the same as on the other two victims.
“So, it looks like our killer handcuffs his victims and then shoots them?” Catherine looked a little confused “But there are no other signs of torturing… So what is the point?”
“I always find it hard understanding maniacs” Grissom sounded really worried “Where are all her belongings?”
“I’ve sent them to Warrick. He’s on this case as far as I know.”
“Yeah… We’re all on this case” answered Grissom and headed for the door” Thanks Al.”
He and Catherine left to see what Warrick have found.


*******

(On the way)

“So you’re really fine or just acting so?” asked Catherine.
“I guess I’m just getting tired of worrying. I just feel angry that we can’t find anything” answered Gil. His voice was so tired that Catherine new- he was being honest.
“What about everything else? How’s Sara?”
“Well, you know. It always gets to her when victims are women. Especially when there are more than one. She takes it personal and it makes it only harder.” Grissom once again answered in his tired voice.
“Gil, you know that I wasn’t asking about the case. Do you really think I’m that stupid? I mean I’m an investigator too you know” Catherine smiled.
“What do you mean?” Grissom tried to sound as casual as it was possible in this situation.
“Oh come on! I know that there is something between you two. I don’t ask me what do I mean by that. Stop acting like a child and admit it to me. You know that I’m your friend and I would never judge you. Well… almost never”
“Ok, so we have been seeing each other for some time. Happy now?” acting irritated asked Grissom. But in heart, he felt relieved, it has been some time that he wanted to tell someone. He just didn’t know who he could trust. She is his subordinate after all. And now, he felt so good, a little guilty for lying, but good.
“You should have told me earlier. I think Brass knows too. Or at least suspect something. But Gil. Are you sure about this? You will get into serious trouble if Ecklie finds out. “
“Guess why we hide it?” Grissom said ironically.
“Yeah, well… Honestly? I never saw you as a couple, but hell- if you’re happy together, I will be happy for you too. Just be careful Grissom. Not only for Ecklie.”
“What do you mean?” Grissom was seriously confused.
“You know what I mean. It’s Sara. It has been quite some time since she fell for you. Be careful with what you offer her. She can misunderstand you. And I don’t think that you want to hurt her?”
“What do you mean misunderstand?” Grissom was actually getting irritated.
“Yeah, like you’re really going to marry her and spend the rest of your life with her?” Catherine said almost laughing.
“And why not?”
“I think you’re not being completely honest with yourself. I know you pretty good. Kill me if you want, but I don’t see you married. And even if you two get married, are you really going to be happy with her?”
Grissom stopped in the hallway. Confusion was evident in his eyes.
“As I said Gil, think, really think about it and please- be careful”.


**********



“Well, Doc. was right. Not every woman can wear this kind of things.” taking one of her rings said Catherine.
“Yeah, her stuff is pretty impressive. How old did you say she was? 24? Not bad… What do you think, rich parents?” going through her things asked Warrick.
“Maybe… Oh, her wallet- Prada- and doesn’t look like one from a trunk in the alley.” Catherine smiled.
“I already checked it. No ID, no credit cards, just some cash, few personal cards” Warrick stated bitterly. They haven’t even identified first two victims. They were going deeper and deeper every night.
“OK… I don’t think that you were too attentive Warrick. Grissom you have to see this” taking three cards from the wallet said Catherine. All three of them looked exactly the same. They were completely black, only few things written in silver letters-address, a phone number and the most important one:


Lady Heather’s Dominion
 
Sorry it took me so long to post this.


Chapter 3

Grissom wasn’t really sure how should he react to that. He stared at the card for some time without saying anything.
“Finally, we might have something” Warrick filed the awkward silence.
“Yeah, I guess she was a client there. That would explain the scars on her back. Maybe we will get her name there. We should check it out. I’ll call Brass. Grissom, you’re coming?“ asked Catherine.
“Yes...I…I am”
“I’ll stay here, work on her clothes” answered Warrick.

(In the car. Grissom’s POV)


Now Catherine knows about me and Sara. I should ask Sara if Catherine told her anything. Maybe it will be better if she doesn’t know. In that case she won’t start acting differently. Catherine was right. If somebody finds out, I will be in a big, BIG trouble. I’m getting paranoid. At some point I’m happy that Catherine knows. I felt really bad lying to her every day. I guess I can call her the closest friend I have, she always helped me, always understood me. But instead of feeling relieved by her knowing everything, I feel fear. If she knows, there is a possibility, a slightest possibility that someone else will notice it. Or she can simply let it slip to someone, without intention, who knows what can happen. I have to do something. I’m not really sure what though…
As if everything isn’t complicated enough, right now I’m sitting in a car, going to Heather’s dominion. I think Sara suspects that there was something between us. Thank God she hasn’t been in the room when Catherine found the dominion cards. That would’ve made everything even more complicating. Sometimes I feel really irritated having to work with people who are like one big family. Because this is how it works: Brass had some, ok I’ll be honest, LOTS OF suspicions about me and Heather. He probably told something about it to Catherine, Catherine mentioned something to Warrick and so on. Now every time someone mentions Lady Heather, everybody start looking at me. And Sara does it too. But she never asked me anything about it. Maybe she’s afraid of my answer? Or she simply doesn’t want to know? However, this turn in the case isn’t going to help anyone. But I can’t understand myself. It is like two different Grissoms inside of me right now. The other side is celebrating! That side of me is happy that I will finally find out how’s Heather doing. I had to control that side of me very strongly in order to not visit Heather during these months. I can still remember her as she was leaving the station. She looked so frustrated, dashed. Later that night I went to her dominion. But I once again I stayed in the car. I saw that the dominion was closed. No surprise there. I could’ve come in that night, or even the night few years ago would’ve been fine. But I stayed in the car both times. I don’t even now how to feel. Pathetic or careful. There’s a great chance that she would’ve sent me away both times, but I should’ve tried.
My own thoughts are starting to scare me. I’m with Sara now, but I still have days when I can’t stop thinking about Heather, about how I could give up probably everything to see that passionate, seductive sparkle in Heather’s eyes. I guess Brass was right. I should’ve bought a sports car. No problems, less thinking.

After getting out of the car, walking towards dominion)

“How’s Heather?” Catherine asked Grissom.
“How should I know? I haven’t seen her since her daughter’s death.”
“Well… I just thought… you know… However, we shouldn’t be expecting anything good, it has been only six, no, wait, seven months. Child’s death isn’t the easiest thing to go through.“ Ringing the doorbell said Catherine.

“Good evening. Your command is our pleasure and vice versa of course. “ A very attractive blonde opened the door and greeted in low, seductive voice without even looking at them. Only when she has noticed who was ringing the bell she understood that this wasn’t going to be about “commands and pleasures”.
Grissom recognized her. That was the same woman who came to Heather in the morning after their night together. When Grissom asked who she was, Heather told him Lauren( he even remembered her name) was usually the person who ran the dominion when she was busy. Yes, Grissom was sure that this woman was Lauren.

“Good evening Captain Brass, Dr. Grissom and … I’m sorry but I don’t remember meeting you. I’m Lauren.”
“I’m Catherine Willows. Nice to meet you” studying the blonde said Catherine. It was obvious that this Lauren was a dominatrix. Her moves, talking manner were secure, you could actually see how she felt strong and powerful in this dominion.
“Yes, Ms. Willows. It’s a pleasure. How could I help you?”
“We really need to speak to Lady Heather if it is possible.” Answered Brass.
“She is occupied at the moment, but let me see what I can do. Why don’t you take a seat” pointing to the “sitting-room” said Lauren and left.
“I guess she’s pretty ok. I mean if she’s having sessions again.” Looking at Catherine said Brass.
“You think she’s with a client? I don’t think that her employees would interrupt her. This Lauren would’ve simply told us to come back later. I mean, we don’t even have a warrant or something. We just need to talk”
At that moment they heard two people speaking. Few moments later they saw them. It was Lady Heather herself and a young-looking, tall, quite attractive man. They were speaking silently. And when they have reached the door, said their goodbyes in the same silent manner. As the door closed Heather turned to her other guests.
“Did we interrupt something important?” Brass asked without even greeting.
“I’m quite surprised Captain Brass. I don’t remember the last time when your first words to me weren’t sarcastic. But no, you didn’t. This man was already leaving anyway.” Heather answered in her usual calm voice, with a slight smile on her face.
“Don’t underestimate me. We still have time… But I will go straight to the point. We’re here because we found few of your cards in a victim’s wallet.”
“I don’t want to disappoint you, but there are lots of people carrying my card in this town. People who I don’t necessarily know.”
Grissom was surprised by her calmness. He was happy to see that Heather, the real Heather was back. Once again her voice was calm but commanding at the same time. Once again she had this challenging stare in her eyes. This was the Heather that he has dreamed about.
“We simply need you to take a look at the picture. Maybe you will know the victim. We need any possible help we can get.” Without taking his eyes of her said Grissom.
“Mr. Grissom, it is already obvious that you’re quite desperate. I can bet that my card wasn’t the only one in the victim’s wallet, but yet, here you’re at my dominion” Catherine smiled at Heather’s words.
“So, please, show me the picture”.
Catherine took the picture and showed it to Heather. She looked at it and showed absolutely no reaction.
“I take it you don’t know who she is?” asked Brass.
“I actually do. This woman worked for me for around three years. She quitted yesterday.” Heather’s calmness surprised even herself.
“So I guess it’s normal that you don’t seem too shocked. I mean, she had already quit, no loss for you” said Brass in his best sarcastic way.
“I already told you. What you see and what I feel are too different things.”
 
Actually, I was planing to "show" Heather's emotional side in this or next chapter:) You're reading my mind:)
 
Chapter 4


“I sincerely hope it is true” answered Brass. Catherine chuckled to that. Heather raised one eyebrow.
“You’re right. I underestimated you” She smiled.” Her name’s Julie Marchet, as far as I know her mother was French. And yes, she quitted yesterday.”
“Do you know the reason?” asked Grissom.
“No, she warned me about her decision to quit three months ago. I thought she had some kind of problems in her personal life. You see Mr. Grissom for all the people who work for me I’m their mistress here, but to interfere in their personal lives- I have no right. Julie assured me that she’d made that decision not because of her work here. She didn’t tell me the reason and I didn’t push her. As I’ve said- I have no right to do so.”
“But weren’t you at least curious?” Catherine looked a little confused.
“Not really. Ms. Willows, most of the people who work here have “normal” lives out there. They have families, husbands, wives, sons and daughters. Some of these people even have other jobs. As far as I understand one of the minuses of a “normal” life is problems. I just thought that Julie had some. As I’ve said, she assured me that there were no problems with the staff or her clients here.” Heather explained once again.
“And you believed her? Maybe she just lied?” Brass asked.
“Why should she? Every single employee here knows- If something is wrong, they come to me. And they do. They come to me and we fix whatever is wrong.”
“Wrong?” Brass raised one eyebrow.
“Yes, Captain Brass. There are rules even here, and some people don’t follow them. Then I have to step in.”
“And does it happen often?” now Brass sounded a lot more professional.
“No. Before letting anybody to become a client here, at first I speak with that person. I have to make sure that my employees will be safe with him or her.”
“You can see everybody through? Another talent?But really how much can you know about a person after only speaking to him?” Brass sounded as sarcastic as only he could be.
“You wouldn’t believe”. As the words left Heather’s mouth she looked at Grissom with a playful smile.
“Did I miss something?” Brass was obviously faking confusion. Catherine wasn’t able to suppress another chuckle. But Grissom didn’t really notice it. He was simply staring at Heather. He couldn’t stop doing that for one simple reason. He saw the same passionate and irresistible sparkle in her eyes. But suddenly she turned her attention back to Brass.
“So, is there anything else I could help you with?”
“Well” Brass was still smiling” You could give us Julie’s home address, all possible contacts of her family maybe? And the room that she worked in here? We don’t have a warrant, but could we take a look at it?”
“Her room is still the way she left it. And of course, process it as long as you have to. If you excuse me, I’ll get her address and all other information in a minute.” said Heather and left the room.
“It went well… It isn’t even visible that her daughter died.” stated Brass.
“As Lady Heather said. What she feels and what we see are two different things. I sincerely doubt if she’s as calm as she looks. And hell, seven months isn’t seven days. She’s a strong woman. I respect her for not braking down.” said Catherine.
“Yeah well, she almost whipped the doctor.”
“Oh come on Jim. You’re a father too. You should understand. If it was me in Heather’s place, I would’ve finished him.” Catherine was looking at Brass with the most serious look on her face.” You really can’t accuse her of that.”
At that moment Catherine’s pager started beeping.
“It’s Warrick” she explained” He found something new on the second victim’s clothing. He wants me to come.”
“You can come with me. I’ll go back to the station to take Greg. We’ll check out Julie’s place. What do you think?” Brass asked Catherine.
“Sure. And you Griss can stay here and examine the room.”
“Yeah, but….Ah... Sure, why not. But I think that sheriff was going to stop by, so if he does, please be nice and DON’T tell him anything about our cases.” Grissom said.
They all heard oncoming footsteps. Lady Heather came back with a peace of paper in her hands.
“That’s all information I found.” She gave the piece of paper to Brass.
“Thank you. Catherine and I will be going. Mr. Grissom here” Brass motioned to Gil “he will stay and examine the room.”
“Of course” with a playful smile said Heather and started walking the two out.
When the door was closed Catherine looked at Brass and smiled.
“She might be creepy, but at least it doesn’t look like he could be her father” said Brass, making Catherine chuckle.


“I’ll show you Julie’s room, if you would just follow me” without any emotion said Heather.
Grissom just nodded silently. They climbed to the second floor. It turned out that Julie’s room was very, VERY small. Grissom doubted if he’ll find anything there, but he had to try.
“If you need anything, I’ll be in my office. I take that you know where it is?” Heather woke Grissom from his thoughts bout the victim.
“Yes, of course.”
She didn’t say anything else, simply left the room. Grissom started examining it.


(In her office, Lady Heather’s POV)


“Those eyes. I swear, if Gil Grissom wouldn’t have the most beautiful eyes in the whole world everything would be different. They’re SO blue .Every time I look at them, I drown. Seriously, it feels as if the ground turns under my feet. Tonight, when he showed up he was standing directly in front of me. I had to fight my self so strongly not to touch his face. But at the same time I knew- something is wrong. He never shows up with good news. That’s the irony, If I want to see Gil, someone will have to die .It’s true. But why Julie? I can still remember how she came to me. She was so young, only 18. Usually I send away people who are so young. But with her it was different. She had something that I liked. She told me everything about her childhood. It wasn’t easy. Her mother was a drunk and her father used to beat both her and the mother. Later she started noticing how the pain that he used to cause her stopped being so “painful”. Then she heard about my club, and wanted to try this. So, I let Lauren dominate Julie for few times. And in few weeks, Julie became a submissive in my club. Two years had past, she was still a submissive, sometimes a dominatrix for beginners. And only three months ago, Julie came to me and said that she will be quitting her job. I was rather shocked. I haven’t noticed anything different about her. Of course, at first I asked her if the reason of her leaving was some client. She said no, and even told me that my club was the best place she had ever found. But I still didn’t feel satisfied. I knew, person like Julie would never leave this place without a good reason. Now she’s dead. I guess I was right. (She walks over her desk and sits down) After Zoe’s death I find it quite hard to hold my cold, calm façade in place. Tonight I surprised myself. My voice was even calmer than I wanted it to be. I guess I should be happy. I’m probably getting my shape back… I’m just fooling myself. I will never get in to the same shape. And now, Julie- simple employee but I can already feel this lump in my throat. .(Tears start building up in her eyes) Maybe I should just let go. At least some times. Why can’t I just cry like very other person, cry without any twinges of conscience. It’s only tears. I’m not harming anyone, I’m not causing any damage. On the contrary, crying would help me. Maybe I would feel better?”


Lady Heather was sitting in her chair behind her big table, she was looking through the window, tears were running down her cheeks. Pain was visible in her eyes. She was thinking so deeply that she didn’t even notice the knock on the door. When nobody answered Grissom simply opened the door to make sure office was empty. But instead he saw Heather sitting deep in her leather chair, looking through the window, eyes filled with tears. Seeing her looking like that made something turn inside of him. The view made him remember the night in the desert. Gil wasn’t sure about his next actions. He wanted to help, he wanted to hug and hold her as long as she needed but he simply didn’t have enough courage to do so.
“Heather…”
Only then she noticed him. She wasn’t even sure if she should feel ashamed for her tears, on angry for him walking on her so suddenly. But instead a wave of understanding struck her. She needed him. She simply needed him. Heather had needed him to hold her that night in the desert, and she needed him to hold her once again. She needed him all this time.
Heather stood up. For once in her life Heather had to overcome herself, to overcome her pride. She walked to Grissom. It was visible how he tensed up as she was getting closer to him. When she was close enough she simply put her head on his shoulder. When she did that, she felt how he let out the air the he was unconsciously holding. His arms slowly came to her back. Now Gil was holding and comforting her. She was standing as close to him as it was possible. Gil could feel her every breath, her every move. He wasn’t sure, but it seemed as if he could feel her heart beating.
After some time Heather calmed down. She moved her head from his shoulder, but not very far. Grissom looked into her eyes. Probably because of all the crying they looked greener and shinier than ever. Gil looked at them and understood how hard it must’ve been for her to do so. To come to him like that. He took her face in his arms, just like the first time, and kissed her softly. The kiss was warm and tender. When he moved away from her and opened his eyes, Heather was smiling slightly and looking at him.
“Care for some tea?” she asked.
“Yes…, yes I believe I do” Grissom smiled.

…….

After the fourth cup of tea that Grissom was having someone knocked on the door. And only then he realized that he had spent the whole night with Heather speaking about everything. They both were surprised how easy it was to communicate with each other. Every topic seemed more interesting then ever. At first they both were a little tensed up, but after second cup of tea everything changed, they were talking, laughing. And this knock woke them from their little dream they’ve been having.
“Come in” said Heather loudly.
Some young girl silently opened the door. She looked ashamed for interrupting her mistress’ morning.
“I’m sorry, but Lady Heather, Mr. Bennington demands to see you.”
“Oh… Tell him I will see him in a moment.” Heather smiled to the girl.
She left the room and Grissom smiled.
“I guess I should go. I’m already surprised how Brass or Catherine didn’t call looking for me.”
“Well, they didn’t look too sad leaving you here alone at the first place.”
“I guess you’re right.” Said Grissom and got up from his chair. When they’ve reached Heather’s office’s door Grissom stopped. He turned to Heather to give her a simple, innocent goodbye kiss. And that’s what it was until Heather slightly opened her mouth and traced Gil’s lower lip with her tongue. Then he simply lost it. His goodbye kiss turned into passionate, lustful kiss. He was holding her tightly in his arms when they heard another knock. Heather pulled away from Gil and chuckled slightly.
“I have to go now. But would you like to have some tea… Let say…” Heather didn’t even have a chance to finish her sentence.
“Tomorrow?” Grissom asked brightly. “Right now it is nine in the morning so the same time tomorrow?”
Heather was smiling playfully. Once again Grissom saw that lustful sparkle in her eyes.
“Careful what you with for Mr. Grissom”
“I guess it is time I should stop being careful.”
 
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