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So it's my first fic here. Feel free to comment, critisize and everything else Hope you like it. Sorry for mistakes.
Everything begins with a thought
This story takes place approximately 7 months after Zoe‘s death.
Las Vegas was always known as probably the nosiest city in whole world. And it is true. It doesn‘t really matter if it is day or night.
Although the most famous fetish club was in a quite silent area, it never fell asleep. Men and women, screams, whips, chains- and no silence. Of course the days in this club were much calmer, but to say that there were no clients who liked to enjoy the provided pleasures during daytime- that would simply be a lie.
This night was just as any other. Screams- pleasure or pain- Rammstein- all noises that are necessary for a good fetish club. But in the higher floor, in the workroom, a beautiful, green-eyed brunette was sitting behind a large, antiquarian oak table. Her face was calm, various contracts on the table and in her hands, but it had been obvious that her mind was somewhere far from them…She was the owner… Lady Heather.
(Lady Heather’s POV)
“It finally feels as always. I guess I will always feel at least a little bit of pain because of Zoe’s death, she was my daughter after all. I wouldn’t be normal if I didn’t feel anything. The thing that I feel stronger than anything now is gratitude for my mother. She was the one who came when Zoe was killed. She understood me, didn’t even offer to go to her house or somewhere else. She knew how destroyed I felt, and understood that the only place where I could regain my power was my dominion. A place where nothing ever happens without my knowledge. A place where I have the power no matter what. Of course, at first I didn’t hold any sessions. It wasn’t safe neither for me nor the clients. But one evening, about a week after Zoe’s funeral, my mother told me:” It is a very bad and not fair thing when children die before their parents. We both understand that. But Heather, honey, Zoe died- not you. Nothing, nobody will ever fill the gap which you feel inside, but that doesn’t mean that your life ended. There are thousands of mothers who lose their children when they’re only babies, and Zoe was already a woman. You gave life to her, you grew her, you had a chance to see her as a gown person. I know that this doesn’t really make you feel any better, but you have to except the truth. Your daughter is dead and you can’t change absolutely anything. Life goes on.”. I guess her words woke me from mourning trance. Step by step I started running my dominion again. Few months passed, I started having personal sessions again. As far as I can tell, clients didn’t notice any difference in me. Of course, my employees still give me strange looks. I don’t judge them. I know that their trust will come back. They just need time. The only person who didn’t act around me differently is Lauren. And I’m not surprised. I have my dominion for almost 12 years now, and she worked for me from the beginning. A professional dominatrix. Every time I can’t handle my personal clients I send them to Lauren. Sometimes I even doubt which one of us is better. Maybe because of that I am higher than her just as her boss. I mean, everybody in this dominion sees me not just as their boss, but as their mistress as well. But with Lauren it is different. We are equal and that I really like about her. Because of that- I can trust her. She was the one who started running my dominion when I was mourning for Zoe. She did it without me even asking her. She understood me… When I felt strong enough to “come back” I thanked her, she simply smiled to me and that was it. My mother once asked me if I’m not afraid that she can try to take over my dominion. And that is not as stupid as it may sound. Long time ago I even asked Lauren why doesn’t she start her own fetish club. She is a perfect dominatrix, smart enough to run her own business. She simply smiled at me and said: “I may be smart enough, and I love working as a dominatrix, but I HATE paperwork.” And it was true. It is obvious that she loves her job the way that it is now. And the thing that I love about her the most is that she never asks me anything. I can still remember that night when Gil Grissom came to talk about my two dead employees and didn’t leave before the morning. Lauren was the one who stopped the gossips by simply telling everyone that Dr. Grissom had already left… I can still remember that night so clearly… I surprised even myself. I don’t give into guys so easily. I’ve burned in the past just enough to understand that it is simply not worth risking. But with him it was different. I guess HE was different. I mean, it took him only one touch, only one look- and I was his. It was one of the most wonderful nights of my life. Yes, he was a little tensed, but I wasn’t the most relaxed ever either. But he was so open for me, so sincere. I could feel him, his desires, his feeling in his every move, every touch, every kiss. I did see his wishes. I knew what he wanted. But I was pleasantly surprised when he gave me just about everything that I wanted. He fulfilled all desires that I had without even a word. That’s why he was so different. He knew exactly what I wanted. And he knew how to give it to me. Even more surprised I felt when he stayed for the night. I believed that a man as reserved as he was should leave me, and go home for the rest of the night, or even go back to work. But he stayed…Only when I woke up I understood how much I missed man’s arms around me in the morning. It felt safe, good. Almost too good. And I was right. During the morning tea he simply hurt me. Not only because he didn’t trust me after the night we spent together, but because he didn’t explain everything to me. Now, after all this time passed I understand that he didn’t really have other choice. But why didn’t he simply tell me what he had to do? Why did he have to look ant me, talk to me in his “professional way”, like I was one of his suspects? As I said earlier, he is an extremely reserved man. He felt that his walls were coming down and got scared. Or at least that is the way that I try to comfort myself…
Across the town, the supervisor of nightshift, Gil Grissom was driving his car to the morgue. He had just finished processing the scene and now needed all possible information about the victim. It was a hard case. Third women found dead under the same circumstances.
(Gil Grissom’ POV)
“Another maniac- that is all Las Vegas needs. I’m tired of this kind of things. It is bad enough when children get killed, women get raped, but it is necessary from time to time to throw in a maniac. The last victim- she looked so young. No more than 20. And she looked very familiar. Maybe I have met her earlier? But I would have remembered that… But her face, her hair… Sara’s reaction surprised me. I always believed that she is quite open-minded person, but tonight I was proved wrong. This girl (It’s hard to even call her a woman), she was dress in leather clothes. From top to toe. And Sara’s first thoughts were that she’s either a prostitute or “some kind of gothic maniac”. Her thinking disappointed me. But on the other hand nobody is perfect, and that’s simply her opinion. I shouldn’t think about this kind of things so much. Especially now, I should find beautiful things about her instead of noticing bad ones. I mean, we have been dating for almost 6 months now. And that is a quite long time. She seems so happy, I guess I’m too. It is nice when you have someone to go to after a hard day. But one thing really bugs me. It has been some time now that she started saying “I love you”. I always answer her the same, but one evening as I said so, I caught myself thinking-“really?”. And from that moment I can’t stop. The need to hide this relationship doesn’t really help. But still, as I said we have been together for almost 6 months… Somehow I feel guilty. I’m not even sure why. I know that she loves me. Her love is deep and at some point even obsessive. But with her I’m safe. I understand it’s very bad to talk this way of a woman that you have an affair with, but she simply doesn’t know me. Well she knows the “Grissom”. She doesn’t know the real person inside. Because this is the way Sara is. She sees how I act in work, around her and that is it. It is enough for her. It is enough for most people. I guess that’s way I feel guilt. I don’t “love” Sara. I do feel something, but I don’t think of it as love. It’s more something like safety. With her I’m safe. She doesn’t want to look inside of me. With her it is simple and safe… I can still remember Heather. That day when we sat in her balcony, drinking tea. She told me my biggest fear. We had met only few times for few minutes and she already knew more about me that my friends. It scared me, but I felt so amazed that it is hard to even tell. But then, once again we met. And again in few moments she found out the thing I had been hiding the most. Her ability to see me through, her ability to understand… I know that it’s part of her job, but it still fascinates me. And it did then. In her dominion, I’ve spend the most amazing night of my life. She was so gentle, subtle, and at the same time- strong, powerful and demanding. For that night, for only one night I knew- I was hers completely. But she was mine too… In the morning after, I’m not really sure what happened. She told me that she had diabetes I knew what I had to do. I had to choose. An amazing woman who knew me better than anybody else or the possibility of compromising the investigation. I was quite sure that keeping the case clean and Heather not hurt- wasn’t quite possible. And I chose. Maybe the thought of her knowing me scared me? I understand that now I’m just trying to excuse my actions. And that shows the obvious. I feel sorry for my decision, I regret it… I needed to tell her I‘d been sorry. At least try to do that. Not so much for her, more for myself. So I could tell myself I tried. I knew she wouldn’t forgive me. But her cold tone and empty eyes simply finished me of. I sound like a soap opera character, but it’s true. That moment I knew, I’ve lost the best chance I’ve ever had, and ever will… Then we met on circumstances that I’ve never even imagined. Her daughter was dead and all could do was tell her to keep a distance from man who probably killed her. One of those times when I feel weaker than I should be…She was on my mind all the time. I think Catherine noticed it. I’m thankful for not saying anything to me… It felt so good to listen to her in the parking-lot. She was speaking to me as nothing had ever happened. Her words were filled with love for her daughter. And then she handed me the condom. I felt something that I shouldn’t have. I felt pain. That is how I found out that I still had feelings for her. I wasn’t even sure what should I say to her. When suddenly it occurred to me, the man that she “did” was actually dead… When I’d found that cross something turned in me. Even now I’m not sure what was I scared of-Heather being in danger or Heather doing something stupid? I had found her in the desert. I knew I had to stop her, but all that pain in her eyes, in her voice… The least I could do was processing her. I simply didn’t want a stranger around her when she was in that kind of state. Once again Catherine understood me, but Brass looked very, very strange. I would even say suspicious. Heather was in shock, her eyes were completely empty. Because of her realizing that she can’t bring her daughter back, or because of realizing what she had almost done? It wasn’t really the most important thing at the time. I processed her, few hours after she was released. I fought the temptation to take her home, to comfort her, I realized that her daughter’s death was quite enough to deal with. She didn’t really need another trouble- a guilty man from her past…
Everything begins with a thought
This story takes place approximately 7 months after Zoe‘s death.
Las Vegas was always known as probably the nosiest city in whole world. And it is true. It doesn‘t really matter if it is day or night.
Although the most famous fetish club was in a quite silent area, it never fell asleep. Men and women, screams, whips, chains- and no silence. Of course the days in this club were much calmer, but to say that there were no clients who liked to enjoy the provided pleasures during daytime- that would simply be a lie.
This night was just as any other. Screams- pleasure or pain- Rammstein- all noises that are necessary for a good fetish club. But in the higher floor, in the workroom, a beautiful, green-eyed brunette was sitting behind a large, antiquarian oak table. Her face was calm, various contracts on the table and in her hands, but it had been obvious that her mind was somewhere far from them…She was the owner… Lady Heather.
(Lady Heather’s POV)
“It finally feels as always. I guess I will always feel at least a little bit of pain because of Zoe’s death, she was my daughter after all. I wouldn’t be normal if I didn’t feel anything. The thing that I feel stronger than anything now is gratitude for my mother. She was the one who came when Zoe was killed. She understood me, didn’t even offer to go to her house or somewhere else. She knew how destroyed I felt, and understood that the only place where I could regain my power was my dominion. A place where nothing ever happens without my knowledge. A place where I have the power no matter what. Of course, at first I didn’t hold any sessions. It wasn’t safe neither for me nor the clients. But one evening, about a week after Zoe’s funeral, my mother told me:” It is a very bad and not fair thing when children die before their parents. We both understand that. But Heather, honey, Zoe died- not you. Nothing, nobody will ever fill the gap which you feel inside, but that doesn’t mean that your life ended. There are thousands of mothers who lose their children when they’re only babies, and Zoe was already a woman. You gave life to her, you grew her, you had a chance to see her as a gown person. I know that this doesn’t really make you feel any better, but you have to except the truth. Your daughter is dead and you can’t change absolutely anything. Life goes on.”. I guess her words woke me from mourning trance. Step by step I started running my dominion again. Few months passed, I started having personal sessions again. As far as I can tell, clients didn’t notice any difference in me. Of course, my employees still give me strange looks. I don’t judge them. I know that their trust will come back. They just need time. The only person who didn’t act around me differently is Lauren. And I’m not surprised. I have my dominion for almost 12 years now, and she worked for me from the beginning. A professional dominatrix. Every time I can’t handle my personal clients I send them to Lauren. Sometimes I even doubt which one of us is better. Maybe because of that I am higher than her just as her boss. I mean, everybody in this dominion sees me not just as their boss, but as their mistress as well. But with Lauren it is different. We are equal and that I really like about her. Because of that- I can trust her. She was the one who started running my dominion when I was mourning for Zoe. She did it without me even asking her. She understood me… When I felt strong enough to “come back” I thanked her, she simply smiled to me and that was it. My mother once asked me if I’m not afraid that she can try to take over my dominion. And that is not as stupid as it may sound. Long time ago I even asked Lauren why doesn’t she start her own fetish club. She is a perfect dominatrix, smart enough to run her own business. She simply smiled at me and said: “I may be smart enough, and I love working as a dominatrix, but I HATE paperwork.” And it was true. It is obvious that she loves her job the way that it is now. And the thing that I love about her the most is that she never asks me anything. I can still remember that night when Gil Grissom came to talk about my two dead employees and didn’t leave before the morning. Lauren was the one who stopped the gossips by simply telling everyone that Dr. Grissom had already left… I can still remember that night so clearly… I surprised even myself. I don’t give into guys so easily. I’ve burned in the past just enough to understand that it is simply not worth risking. But with him it was different. I guess HE was different. I mean, it took him only one touch, only one look- and I was his. It was one of the most wonderful nights of my life. Yes, he was a little tensed, but I wasn’t the most relaxed ever either. But he was so open for me, so sincere. I could feel him, his desires, his feeling in his every move, every touch, every kiss. I did see his wishes. I knew what he wanted. But I was pleasantly surprised when he gave me just about everything that I wanted. He fulfilled all desires that I had without even a word. That’s why he was so different. He knew exactly what I wanted. And he knew how to give it to me. Even more surprised I felt when he stayed for the night. I believed that a man as reserved as he was should leave me, and go home for the rest of the night, or even go back to work. But he stayed…Only when I woke up I understood how much I missed man’s arms around me in the morning. It felt safe, good. Almost too good. And I was right. During the morning tea he simply hurt me. Not only because he didn’t trust me after the night we spent together, but because he didn’t explain everything to me. Now, after all this time passed I understand that he didn’t really have other choice. But why didn’t he simply tell me what he had to do? Why did he have to look ant me, talk to me in his “professional way”, like I was one of his suspects? As I said earlier, he is an extremely reserved man. He felt that his walls were coming down and got scared. Or at least that is the way that I try to comfort myself…
Across the town, the supervisor of nightshift, Gil Grissom was driving his car to the morgue. He had just finished processing the scene and now needed all possible information about the victim. It was a hard case. Third women found dead under the same circumstances.
(Gil Grissom’ POV)
“Another maniac- that is all Las Vegas needs. I’m tired of this kind of things. It is bad enough when children get killed, women get raped, but it is necessary from time to time to throw in a maniac. The last victim- she looked so young. No more than 20. And she looked very familiar. Maybe I have met her earlier? But I would have remembered that… But her face, her hair… Sara’s reaction surprised me. I always believed that she is quite open-minded person, but tonight I was proved wrong. This girl (It’s hard to even call her a woman), she was dress in leather clothes. From top to toe. And Sara’s first thoughts were that she’s either a prostitute or “some kind of gothic maniac”. Her thinking disappointed me. But on the other hand nobody is perfect, and that’s simply her opinion. I shouldn’t think about this kind of things so much. Especially now, I should find beautiful things about her instead of noticing bad ones. I mean, we have been dating for almost 6 months now. And that is a quite long time. She seems so happy, I guess I’m too. It is nice when you have someone to go to after a hard day. But one thing really bugs me. It has been some time now that she started saying “I love you”. I always answer her the same, but one evening as I said so, I caught myself thinking-“really?”. And from that moment I can’t stop. The need to hide this relationship doesn’t really help. But still, as I said we have been together for almost 6 months… Somehow I feel guilty. I’m not even sure why. I know that she loves me. Her love is deep and at some point even obsessive. But with her I’m safe. I understand it’s very bad to talk this way of a woman that you have an affair with, but she simply doesn’t know me. Well she knows the “Grissom”. She doesn’t know the real person inside. Because this is the way Sara is. She sees how I act in work, around her and that is it. It is enough for her. It is enough for most people. I guess that’s way I feel guilt. I don’t “love” Sara. I do feel something, but I don’t think of it as love. It’s more something like safety. With her I’m safe. She doesn’t want to look inside of me. With her it is simple and safe… I can still remember Heather. That day when we sat in her balcony, drinking tea. She told me my biggest fear. We had met only few times for few minutes and she already knew more about me that my friends. It scared me, but I felt so amazed that it is hard to even tell. But then, once again we met. And again in few moments she found out the thing I had been hiding the most. Her ability to see me through, her ability to understand… I know that it’s part of her job, but it still fascinates me. And it did then. In her dominion, I’ve spend the most amazing night of my life. She was so gentle, subtle, and at the same time- strong, powerful and demanding. For that night, for only one night I knew- I was hers completely. But she was mine too… In the morning after, I’m not really sure what happened. She told me that she had diabetes I knew what I had to do. I had to choose. An amazing woman who knew me better than anybody else or the possibility of compromising the investigation. I was quite sure that keeping the case clean and Heather not hurt- wasn’t quite possible. And I chose. Maybe the thought of her knowing me scared me? I understand that now I’m just trying to excuse my actions. And that shows the obvious. I feel sorry for my decision, I regret it… I needed to tell her I‘d been sorry. At least try to do that. Not so much for her, more for myself. So I could tell myself I tried. I knew she wouldn’t forgive me. But her cold tone and empty eyes simply finished me of. I sound like a soap opera character, but it’s true. That moment I knew, I’ve lost the best chance I’ve ever had, and ever will… Then we met on circumstances that I’ve never even imagined. Her daughter was dead and all could do was tell her to keep a distance from man who probably killed her. One of those times when I feel weaker than I should be…She was on my mind all the time. I think Catherine noticed it. I’m thankful for not saying anything to me… It felt so good to listen to her in the parking-lot. She was speaking to me as nothing had ever happened. Her words were filled with love for her daughter. And then she handed me the condom. I felt something that I shouldn’t have. I felt pain. That is how I found out that I still had feelings for her. I wasn’t even sure what should I say to her. When suddenly it occurred to me, the man that she “did” was actually dead… When I’d found that cross something turned in me. Even now I’m not sure what was I scared of-Heather being in danger or Heather doing something stupid? I had found her in the desert. I knew I had to stop her, but all that pain in her eyes, in her voice… The least I could do was processing her. I simply didn’t want a stranger around her when she was in that kind of state. Once again Catherine understood me, but Brass looked very, very strange. I would even say suspicious. Heather was in shock, her eyes were completely empty. Because of her realizing that she can’t bring her daughter back, or because of realizing what she had almost done? It wasn’t really the most important thing at the time. I processed her, few hours after she was released. I fought the temptation to take her home, to comfort her, I realized that her daughter’s death was quite enough to deal with. She didn’t really need another trouble- a guilty man from her past…