BACK IN TIME!! A ERIC AND CALLEIGH FAN FICTION

belluvsmiami

belluvsmiami

Prime Suspect
OK THIS IS ONE OF MY 3 FAN FICTIONS I HAVE WRITTEN AND IT STARTS FROM WHEN THEY TEAM WERE ALL TEENAGERS ETC ENJOY AND COMMENTS ARE MOST WELCOME !!

Chapter 1

They walked hand in hand down the hall, they were so in sync that each stride was perfectly matching person next to them.
He was the hottest football player in school and everyone wanted to be with him or be him.
She was the prettiest girl in school her hair was long and blonde and she was thin and she was rich.
She was friends with everyone and they all loved her for it.
Jake and calleigh were the best couple at school and no one would ever get in there way.
Jkae had kissed calleigh on the head and then he went off to class.
Calliegh spun around and she went to her classes as well.
Calleigh went and sat with her friends theresa clara graciee and kendra.
T: hey calliegh
C: hey girls
G: so hows jake?
C: jake is good we went to the movies last night and oh my was i nervous
K: so what did he do?
C: hey i dont tell ok then she turned around.
But i will say it was hottttt!!! then she laughed
Graciee theresa clara and kendra all laughed and said
I bet it was.
After class calleigh was wlaking down the hall when she bumped into someone and she said
C: oh im sorry and she helped pick up his books
T-t-thanks i guess
Calleigh smiled and then she got up and walked away.
Her hair was sawying from side to sode and he could smell her scent in the hair then somone else bumped into him and he dropped his books again.
Jake laughed and then he kept walking towards calleigh.
When he caught up with calleigh he swung her around and then he kissed her.
The other guy had just gotten up and he looked at them and had a look of dissapointment on his face.
Later that day calleigh went to class and she seen the guy she bumped into in the hall and he was sitting next to her.
Calleigh smiled and then she looked again but he wasnt looking at her he was just reading.
C: hey im calleigh i bumped into you in the hall i havent seen you anywhere before are you new
Yeah iam i arrived here yesterday the names eric
C: well eric have you got a last name eric? she giggled
He held out his hand and said
E: Delko eric delko
C: well hi delko eric delko im duquesne calleigh duquesne
She smiled at him then he looked up and he seen her eyes and they caught him a little off guard
E: wow how bright are your eyes
Then jake walked in and sat next to calleigh and she turned away.
C: hey jake glad you finally got here
then eric put his head back down and continued to read.
CHAPTER 2
Eric was walking home as he lived a fair few blocks from school.
Rather than catch the bus he preferred to take in the view and enjoyed the walk.
He was only about a block or two from home when he looked up and seen the girl from school.
Calleigh saw him from her front porch and being the friendliest and most cheerful girl in town she put her hand up and in her southern drawl she said
C: heeeeey eric!
Eric lifted his head again and see her and his face brightened up when he seen her.
E: oh uh hey calleigh
Then he stopped and calleigh started to walk down the front steps to the front gate
C: hey whatcha doing she said with a smile
E: uh nothing just walking home
C: what you dont catch the bus?
E: na i prefer to walk and the view is great
C: i guess if your into that then she laughed
E: you should try it sometime he said
Calleigh was nodding her head and was holding in a laugh
C: maybe i wil one day eric maybe i will
Then calleigh and eric smiled at each other and then jake turned up in his pick up truck .
Eric whispered
E: i better go and then calleigh also whispered
C: ok see you eric
And then eric quickly walked off before jake could do anything.
When eric got home he went straight upstairs and into his room
His room had a big tree right outside the window that he could climb into..
As he was sitting down doing his homework his sister marisol came in and jumped on his bed and was laying sideways.
M: hey little man what you doing?
E:im not little he laughed then he spun around on his chair to see marisol.
M: so how was school today?
E: umm yeah it was good for a majority
M: really?????? i thought you would have come home with something at least done to you
E: thanks marisol way to go on making me feel better
M: im sorry its just why do you do chemistry its way off your classes yet
E: because i like it ok is that so wrong?
M: gees sorry i asked
E: im sorry i snapped
M: well you are kinda gorgeous but you hide behinds those nerdy glasses and ....
E: IM NOT NERDY CANT A GUY BE SMART AND KEEP TO HIMSELF?
M: uh yeah eric thats what nerds do!!!!!!
E: nu huh?
M: YUH HUH
E: you lie
M: you deny she laughed
Then eric threw a pillow at her then he said
E: marisol can i ask you a question?
M: sure its not sex related is it???
E: nooo and what would you know anyways?
M: nothing now ask the question
E: what do you know about calleigh duquesne?
M: ah ha i knew there was something else there always is
Well let me see well umm she dates the hottest guy in school umm her parents are rich her dads a lawyer and oh yeah my brother loves her she laughed
E: get out marisol he joked
M: ERIC AND CALLEIGH SITTING IN THAT TREE (pointing to the one outside) KI-SS-ING
E: GET OUT MARISOL NOW!!! Then she walked out and he locked the door.
Eric was having a had time concentrating because all he could think about was how pretty calleigh looked and how green her eyes were and how much he wanted to date her.
 
CHAPTER 3
Over the weekend eric kept bumping into calleigh everywhere in the fruit shop at the drug store at the markets at the cafe and then in the mall.
E: ma im going to have a look over here ok
EM: ok ill meet you back here in an hour
E: ok
Then eric started to look around the shop for a new pair of pants and shoes and then he took the pants and went to try them on.
As he was getting changed he saw something in the mirror reflection
In the curtain it was calleigh getting undressed in her change room.
Eric was leaning more to his right to see more better and then he fell out of his change room and out infront of everyone his pants still half down and you could see his boxers showing.
E: CRAP eric jumped up and quickly and got back into his change room.
Calleigh giggled from her change room and then eric got his pants and left.
Eric was siting on a bench eating ice cream waiting for his mother when someone came and sat next to him
E: sorry
C: dont be you havent done anything
Eric looked up and it was calleigh
E: hey calleigh
C: eric that was too funny back there
E: oh yeah you seen that did you?
C: i know you were looking at me
E: there now theres something i can say sorry for he laughed
C: its ok i was looking at you too those curtains always do leave a little open she giggled
There was a photo booth infron of them and calleigh said
C: hey you wanna go in?
E: arent those for couples?
C: no its just fun eric come on
E: i dont know what would jake say
C: i dont need jake to tell me what i can and cant do come on and she grabbed his hand and took him in and she sat on his lap
Eric was beginning to get worried as calleigh got him so excited.
They put their money to get 2 lots of printouts and then calleigh grabbed his face and they pulled funny faces for the first six then eric and calleigh did a serious face and then calleigh went to kiss eric on the cheek but he misinterpreted it and kissed her on the lips.
Calleigh didnt do anything so she kissed him back.
Then the camera took the last picture and it was of them kissing and then they pulled apart and she soflt said
C: WOW
E: did you just say wow?
C: uh yes i mean wow look at the time i better go before my dad gets worried and then they got their photos and looked at them and then they laughed at the funny ones and then they left.
Eric met up with his mother and then they went home.
When eric got home he went up to his room again and he was looking at calleigh and his pictures.
Eric knew calleigh was fun and there was something that she did to him when they were together they had a spark that made both of them do the most spontaneous of actions.
Eric stared at the picture of them kissing for ages.
Then marisol burst into his room and she jumped on his bed and snatched the pictures.
E: MARISOL GIVE THEM BACK!!!!!!
M: NU HUH!!!! oh my god eric this is you and calleigh what did you do?
E: nothing we were shopping at the mall i seen her she suggested we get the pictures done and then by accident
M: what you stuck your tongue down her throat?
E: hey hey im not like that
M: oh thats right sweet nice little romeo eric she laughed
E: you better kept this quiet marisol
M: whats in it for me?
E: you keep it quiet and i wont tell ma that your sneaking out to see that policeman horatio whats his name he laughed
M: hey how did you know about that? and hes not that much older than me only 5 years
E: you know ma or dad wont see it that way
M: ok fine then deal
E: and what exactly are you doing with him anyways?
M: nothing just fooling around now shhh before anyone else hears.
Then marisol left and gave the pictures back to eric which he put under his pillows.
 
CHAPTER 4

The next week at school calleigh and her friends were watching everyone walk in and calleigh saw eric and he smiled then he kept walking.
Clara: Hey calleigh i think the new boy has a thing for you
C: dont be silly she said
Then another guy walked past and kendra smiled and said
K: hey you
He looked at her then smiled
Then he looked at the girl standing next to her and smiled as well then he put his head down and kept walking.
He yelled out
R: hey eric isnt it?
E: yeah umm ryan right?
R: yeah you got me How was your weekend?
E: great i embarrassed myself at the mall infront of everyone and then i just studied the rest of the weekend.
R: what is that it? you didnt let loose?
E: let loose how??? he shook his head
R: well ok me and the girls went out on the water with the boat and then we took the jet skis out
E: jet skis wow are you as loaded as they are? pointing at calleighs friends
R: well yeah kinda but i dont like to tell everyone thats my difference they do tell hhow much they have i dont
E: WOW thats great we have a summer house with all our boats and stuff in it but i scuba dive not much of a boater
R: scuba boat they all got something in common ....water this weekend im taking you out ok?
E: ok thanks ryan
R: oh hey call me wolfe please
E: ok wolfe then
In class eric and calleigh and jake were all sitting next to each other and then the teacher split them up with the person to their left
J: sir umm whats the rule?
TEACHER: First row third row look at the person to your right thats your partner for this assigment.
Eric looked to his left and seen it was calleigh and jake looked to his left and seen kendra.
J: great
K: yeah nice to see you too jake she said sarcastically
Eric was happy that he and calleigh were working on the assignment together and jake wasnt.
The assignment was each handed out to everyones group and each was different and they had to research something.
Calleigh and eric had to research the school and its history whereas jake and kendra had the towns history.
The teacher said it was due in 4 weeks and he expected only the best.
It was time for sport and they were playing dodgeball.
Eric was always good at dodgeball as was calleigh.
Once they got inside the hall jake was with his friends coop and stetler and they were looking at eric and then laughing and eric knew it.
Eric went and sat down and they waited for the teacher
T: WHAT ARE YOU LOT WAITING FOR LINE UP COME ON
They all lined up and jake and calleigh were on one team and eric and ryan were on another.
The started throwing the ball and eric was surprisngly good he caught all the balls that were thrown his way and always got an opposing player.
Then it weas down to eric ryan and kendra and clara and jake calleigh and rick and theresa.
Ryan got rick and then theresa got clara and then ryan got theresa out and then rick and it was down to two each.
Calleigh had one ball and she threw it at ryan and he caught it and then eric had the ball and he went to throw it at calleigh but for some reason he couldnt.
He froze and then as he was standing still jake hit eric and he was out.
Then ryan had the ball and hit jake and then it was ryan vs calleigh.
Calleigh threw the ball and it missed ryan and then he threw it and calleigh and missed but then she threw the ball again and got him out.
Then calleigh was jumping around and saying
C: we won we won we won
Jake ran in and kissed calleigh making sure eric was watching
Then eric looked at jake and the he walked of into the locker room.
Jake walked in after him and said
J: hey do you have something on my girl or what?
E: i - i dont know what your talking about jake
J:calleigh thats what
E: oh right jake we are just doing an assignment together thats it
J: mmm hmm it better be
E: let go of me jake or else
J: or else what?
Then eric hit jake really hard in the chest with both palms of his hands and jake fell over
Jake got up and went to charge eric but ryan and coop jumped infornt of him and stopped him
J: im watching you he said to eric and pointing at him
E: ok jake it was just a game get over it
J: OH I SEE WELL GAMES ON THEN DELKO
R: eric what is this all about?
E: i dont know gees im just playing dodgeball and trying to get through school.
R: that better be all your doing he said and then eric got changed and went to his next class.

 
CHAPTER 5
Later that week ryan told eric that he would pick him up nice and early to go out on the boats.
On saturday ryan pulled up at 8am and beeped and eric came out.
Marisol was watching him leave and said
M: be careful eric
E: i always am marisol then he waved and said bye
Ryan and Eric and they all headed out to the lake.
They pulled up and they were unloading the boat and jet skis.
Ryan looked over and saw kendra clara theresa and graciee and calleigh laying their towels out on the rocks.
Ryan looked over and they waved and then eric loked away
R: what man?
E: nothing ive just never been to anything like this before
R: like what?
E: guys and girls hanging out at alake bathing and swimming and stuff
R: worried something might happne with the blondie
E: what makes you say that ryan?
R: oh nothing just genereal observation.
Then Jake Coop and Stetler all pulled up with their jet skis and they nodded at eric and ryan.
J: hey coop dont go easy on new boy today will ya?
C: you got it jake
J: i hate how ryan brings theses newbies into our group
S: or is it that you hate how eric gets along with your girl
J: say what stetler?
S: uh nothing ...jake...... yeah ....i.... i .....uh i hate him too
J: thats more like it.
After they all got their jet skis in the water they decided to go grab some drinks and the girls minded their stuff.
Whilst they were gone the girls got on the jet skis and took them for aspin on the water.
Calleigh was always the best at everything and graciee and theresa nearly got thrown back until the learnt not to pull the throttle so hard.
They soon seen the guys trucks coming back so they put the skis back where they found them and headed back to the rocks.
When they got there ryan and eric went right above the flat rocks to the highest point as the flat rocks where the girls were was way below them but close to the water and then they jumped and said
E&R: JERONOMOE!!!!
And then jake stetler and coop followed and they all splashed the girls soaking them all.
Eric and jake came up out of the water and they were watching calleigh who now stood up and she was wearing a black bikini with gold rings on the side and in the center of the bust.
E: WOW
J: HUH?
E: i said wow that was a big jump
Jake knew exactly what eric was talking about.
Then all the girls asked ryan to take them out on the boat and kendra stayed very close to ryan on the wheel of the boat.
Ryan had hooked up rubber tubes and then the girls grabbed onto the bars and ryan took them out on the water .
Eric was on the jet ski behind him so he could catch anyone who may fall off.
Ryan pulled full throttle and then they all took off.
Theresa and graciee and clara held on for the whole time whereas calleigh fell off.
Ryan was about 500m ahead of eric and eric seen calleigh and went to pick her up when jake pulled up and he said
J: i got this one eric and pulled calleigh up on his jet ski
E: ok jake!!!!!!!! then eric took off and then they all headed back for a bbq lunch on the side of the lake.
Coming up to the lake was a regular thing for jake stetler and coop and ryan that they had their own tables and chairs and campfire and bbq built.
Ryan and jake cooked and the eric just went for a walk around the other side of the lake into some bushland.
Eric kept thinking about how good calleigh looked then he seen her in the water.
 
This is actually pretty good for a "Back in time" fanfic. But... I really think you could use a good beta reader. Fanfiction is much easier and much more fun to read if utilize basic mechanics.

PM me if you'd like me to explain more.

-LLK

(Also, as a PS. Using all caps in your titles and a/n's is like shouting at your readers. You don't have to capitalize something to make it intersting.)
 
hi yes i would please like for you to explain as even though i mean no harm i feel a little offended that its not easy to read .
i have this posted on the cbs site and i thought id strech out a bit further and so far this has got 410 chapters so please explain what it is that im doing wrong i always do like to hear and sorry for the caps. bel
 
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