"Holding You, I've Held Everything"--H/Y fic

H

Hummer

Lab Technician
*******

Yelina Salas pushed open the door to the Miami Dade Crime Lab. It was hard, returning there, and facing the life she had left behind. The memories that fled back to her were strong and unrelenting. None more prominent than that memory of the last time she had exited those doors. With Horatio. Nearly two years before.

Despite the time that had passed, her recollection of him had not dimmed. At certain times, while she was away, there had been moments when she thought that he was near. Whether it is a sensation that he was standing near, the faint smell of him on a sudden breeze, or the echo of that voice. The voice that had haunted her. Always seeming to be in her thoughts or just inches from her ear.

It is all strange, how she had arrived at those moments. From the instant she had gotten on the plane, she had felt incomplete. Part of her wanted to tell Horatio all of this but knew she couldn’t. He was doing it all for them. She had to realize that. For the safety her family. Besides, as he had said, there wasn’t enough time. So, feeling helpless, she watched from the window as he walked solemnly along the side of the plane as it rolled down the runway. Knowing that her life was not the same without him.

Now, she enters the elevator and sighs. It calms her greatly that she is in the same building as him. Outside she had seen his hummer in the parking lot. It had been a welcome sight. As she had walked alongside it she had ran her hand along the length of it. She could’ve sworn that, as she walked past, she could smell his scent.
 
Very nicely written Hummer. Looking forward to the next installment! :)
 
Horatio walks thoughtfully out into the hallway. He is on his way to a court hearing to present evidence on a case his team had worked several months ago. This part of the crime solving process is always the drudgery part.

Despite all of the work, his thoughts had been elsewhere all day. Two years ago that day, he had taken Yelina to the airport. It was a date and moment in time he could not forget—even if he wanted to. His own heart had left Miami that day, leaving him deficient. He was alone and left in a shadowy place. His beacon was gone and he had let her go.
Since then, he had spent every moment spent trying not to remember her. There was no use in dwelling in the past. He wanted to move on, let her be happy. It was better that way.

This he failed miserably at. There was no erasing that feeling he had experienced with her: that electric touch whenever he was lucky enough to come in physical contact with her, that rapid acceleration of his heart beat whenever their eyes met, the silence of words gone unsaid.

Just knowing that she was married hurt deeply. It always had. However, his love for her had only grown over the years. Just when he felt his degree of love could not reach a more stupendous height—it did just that. He knew that he should move on and he had tried. Yet, nothing and no one compared to her. As much as it wounded him to accept, she was…is…his everything.

Now, Horatio walks slowly down the hallway. Staring only at the floor below him as he painfully recollected her. The afternoon sun is just coming out from behind a cloud and shines cheerfully through the windows. However, the sun could never lighten the dimness of his heart—only one light could do that.

He stops and turns towards the sunshine and raises his sunglasses to his eyes. Such sad eyes. He stands there for a moment, faintly hearing the elevator doors open. With a heavy sigh, he looks at his feet.

“Why so glum?” she asks.

Slowly he raises his head, his pulse quickens, and he fears that if he looks towards the voice there will be no one there. Perhaps just his imagination…but he knows there is no mistaking that voice. The world seems to stop and he can almost vow that there is distant music playing.

“Yelina?” he asks, removing his sunglasses.
 
There was a long silence before either of them could move or even speak. So many days had passed since they had been able to exchange such gazes. Both of them had counted the moments—the seconds—with such held breath that the relief they were feeling then, was almost too much to stand. In truth, they were indeed able to breathe again. For each is the others’ life force. Their raison d'être.

The world around them seemed to blur slowly by. Neither had felt this way for two long aching years. Indeed, for their time apart, each had sought comfort elsewhere. Both had wanted a release from the hold the other had on them. Yet there was no substitute for something so real. A love that was wrong on so many levels, yet so right.

“Yelina,” Horatio repeats, trying her name out again on his tongue, he hadn’t said it in so long. “When’d you get back?”

Yelina smiled. Her eyes just couldn’t get enough of him. Perhaps she was dreaming after all. Yet, there he was, just standing there, those blues eyes no longer harboring the same sadness she had seen a moment ago. The scars in his eyes no longer present. He was a changed man and she had caused it. If this was indeed a dream, she didn’t want ever to awaken from it.

“A few hours ago. I would’ve called you but…” she began.

The two of them let the distance between them slowly erase. It had been such a long time with so many miles of separation that any space left between them was painful. When they embraced this time, it wasn’t a farewell or a greeting. The light kiss they left on each other’s lips hadn’t been hesitant or planned and neither seemed regretful it had happened. It just came so natural.


“I’ve missed you,” Yelina mummers into his collar as she wraps her arms around his neck.

Horatio had dreamt of this moment for the last two years, the sensation of having Yelina close to him again and in his arms. That had been one of the hardest parts of letting her go. When, just before she left, they had embraced in a similar fashion. It was excruciating to have her so close and have to ignore what his heart was telling him to say: to tell her how he felt—how he’d always feel. He did not know how long Yelina was back. Perhaps all this would lead to him letting her go again physically, and stumbling to let her go emotionally.

“I’ve missed you too,” he sighed closing his eyes.

The entire time she was away, there had always been the thought of her looming. No woman he had tried to have a relationship with could touch the depth to which he loved her. There had been a hint of care for them but he had always felt that, in some way, he was betraying her and that had confused him greatly.

“How long are you staying?” he asked voice thick.

Yelina sniffled and closed her eyes. It felt so good having him so close and it was hard to concentrate on anything else other than the feel of him. As she inhaled it was fully realized how much she had even missed the scent of him. Surely if there was a heaven, this was it.

“Um,” Yelina started wiping tears from her eyes over his shoulder. “I don’t know.”

Horatio exhaled deeply, still holding her. There are no to eloquently describe the emotions that he was feeling then. Neither rhyme nor reason could express the way he felt at that very moment. The passion, the relief, the profoundness, and the willingness he had to express, unabashedly, his love for this woman. However, logic told him this was not the time.

“I really don’t know how safe it is here,” she continued. “But we needed to come back.”

Horatio took a moment to process her words. Did she mean that Raymond and Ray Jr. were there in Miami with her? Ah yes, the reminder that the only woman he had ever truly loved was married—and to his brother. Horatio felt his gut wrench as he pulled away.

“Um, our house—we’re selling it. I know my Mother could’ve but…I wanted to see Miami again,” Yelina continued a smirk on her face. “So did Ray Jr.”

Horatio stood less than an arms length away from her. It was too soon to get any farther away and it ached too greatly. It was all he could do not to pull her to him. Everything was just so surreal he half expected to blink and she’d be gone. Wild horses couldn’t drag him away from her then.

“I see,” Horatio nodded. “And how’s Raymond?”

Yelina swallowed hard and tore her eyes away from his.
 
Brilliant. I absolutely love it. :D I've made some other comments in the H/Y thread. ;)
 
WHAT HAPPENED TO RAY!?!?! DID HE DIE!?!?! :devil: IS HE GONE!?!?! Sorry. I love this story! it's awesome and i love how you wrote them! :D
 
A very magical fic. So very well written and the imagry is amazing! I think the title goes perfectly with it. isn't it a line from a Garth Brooks song?
 
Horatio watched her closely and a frown found its way onto his face. There was something she was hesitant to tell him and he could tell this immediately. They knew each other like this. Knowing someone for so long did that and these two had certainly had their share of history.

“Raymond,” Yelina scoffed. “I don’t know how he is.”

Horatio frowned at this. He was concerned as to where his brother was and what else he did to cause her unhappiness. Right then, he felt as if they were repeating history. Little brother back on the wild wagon. He was not going to stand for it to happen again. Already he regretted that he could not stop it before.

“What do you mean?” Horatio asked, shifting his weight.

The two still were very close standing there in the hallway. They had moved even closer now. One had only to move an inch to erase all of the air between them. Neither cared what others thought as they walked by; neither noticed. It was not important and their world was all their own. They not only wanted the closeness—they needed it desperately.

“He left. Now before you say anything let me explain,” Yelina spoke quickly, watching Horatio’s expression change drastically.

Horatio looked away for a moment and swallowed hard. The expressions on his face spoke volumes. He was upset with his younger brother already without this news. After all, the man had not contacted Suzie and Madison at all. When he had talked to Suzie a few months before, she had expressed no knowledge on the news that Raymond was alive.

“I’m listening,” Horatio sighed, looking back to her.

Yelina nodded and wasted no time in telling him. She could sense the intensity in his voice as he said this. Telling how he felt about a subject had never been very hard to figure out. Not even his emotions towards her.
 
omg! i love it. i love horatio and yelina and really wanted them to get together. you are an amazing writer, please update soon i can't wait!
 
“Raymond wants to clear his name,” Yelina begins.

Horatio raised his eyebrows. How could a man, who’s supposed to have died, going to clear his name without getting himself killed? He couldn’t possibly clear his name with the US government. Could he?

“Yelina, I don’t think I have to tell you how crazy that is,” Horatio swallows.

Yelina nods rapidly and looks anywhere but his face. It is hard to think with him looking at her like that. His expression is soft and warm. The face that she had missed dearly and it was breaking her heart every time she looked at it. It is just too beautiful.

“I know. I know. I tried to stop him but he wouldn’t listen. I don’t even know where he is. I’m just sick of it. It’s as if the past is repeating itself. He leaves and we don’t know where he is,” Yelina frowns.

Horatio holds out his hand. Yelina stared at if for a moment then looks up at his face. There is another tinge of sadness in his eyes.

“Come on,” he says.

Yelina gives a brief smile and places her hand in his. His skin is cool and welcoming. They both welcome the contact and feel relief. It has been so long since these two had touched hands. It felt so pleasing that for a long moment they just stood there with their hands clasped.

“Let’s talk somewhere else,” he speaks finally.

Yelina blinks back tears and nods. She willingly follows him to the elevator, finding a smile on her face and his. Neither had ever felt such a burden lifted than they did now.

“Where are we going?” Yelina questions.

Horatio walks with her to the elevator.

“My place,” he nods.
 
OMG keep writing i need to know what happens at his place before the suspense kills me! :)
 
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