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Guest
Guest
Hi all, I haven't written for a while (as in general writing), but I used to write shorts with friends and I always loved it. CSI is always something I love unwinding to late at night, and I thought I'd try my hand at putting something together. It's complete but I'll post it in parts to see what the feedback is like. Any advice would be welcome, although bear in mind I'm not used to writing fanfic for CSI so if I get a mood slightly wrong don't berate me for it The parts are divided up into times and places.
Title: Killers Anonymous
Rating: PG-13 (could probably be lower but I guess there's a couple of adult themes "hinted" at.
Summary: I'm not going to summarise a story this short, there'd be no point reading the details then
Disclaimer: None of the characters or organisations are my own. The situations are, but the way the characters react are my interpretation of the characterisation from the show.
Disclaimer: None of the places mentioned are meant to be real, any similarity to hotel names is purely coincedental. Certain product names are taken from real products, and are used merely as props.
Think that covers just about everything, I enjoyed writing this so I hope you enjoy reading it, if the feedback is good I'll post the next part for you in a few days.
Geek point: I picked the name Gastrono because of its similarity with Nostromo (Google it if you don't recognise the name), just popped into my head, was unintentional.
Killers Anonymous by Iain Cartledge
===================================
09:48, Gastrono Hotel Room 448
The sun pierced through the little tears in the curtains, spiking onto Sally’s bloodshot eyes, looking straight ahead blankly, telling tales of the drinking from the previous night. The room embraced the aura of silence, only the occasional creaking spring disturbing the serenity of the scene.
Sally blinked, trying to flutter away the headache with her pretty eyelashes and to blind out the memories of the party, where she had swallowed too much champagne, and gambled too much money. But it was Vegas, she kept on telling herself, lying to herself that none of it mattered, but since her marriage had collapsed in the wake of Bill telling her about his affair with the gym instructor her life had been a spiral of downward decline, propped up by drinks and every opportunity to turn her wages into chips. What a mire of clichés she thought rubbing away the dust in her eyes and smudging black, powdery mascara onto her cheeks. She swung her hand to the table, flailing wildly as if it was an out-of-control sock, and half-cringed as she heard the glass tumble over and roll across the wooden surface. There was no point trying to stop it, and it would expend well needed energy that she would need to see herself through the day. She thankfully heard it hit the carpet with a dull thud, instead of the expected shattering and recommenced flailing until her hand finally grasped what she was looking for.
God, was it ten o’clock already? She usually woke up every two hours on the dot when she had been drinking, but maybe the champagne still had an effect on her where most drinks failed. Picking up the glass, she wandered through to the closet bathroom and poured herself a much needed glass of water. Her throat felt like someone had been sitting on her tongue sanding away all night. She lit a cigarette and sipped the water, smoke curling up towards the idle ceiling fan. It was time to find out what sort of day awaited her.
The bright light took her by surprise, another fine Nevada morning, basking the entire room in a glow of contentment and giving Sally a ghostly appearance, white, worn skin sagging around her eyes and worry lines clear to all on her forehead, mascara silhouetting her eyes and cheek bones like a movie villain. Maybe this was why she loved rooms several floors up, so that no-one would be able to see her with her early morning demeanour. With that lovely sound that every French door makes when it is opened, ending with a little squeak as the rubber meets the end of the rail, Sally stepped out onto the balcony. She could see all the way down to the Strip from here.
If things had worked out differently, maybe she would have made something with her life, or had a son or a daughter, with a wonderful husband and a big house, but things worked out bad, and now, the balcony looked attractive, the railings beckoned to her, flaking rust-coloured paint drawing her close. Taking a long drag on her cigarette she could imagine it being her last, it would be so easy, just walk to the edge, climb up and then just close her eyes and drop deadweight. What a strange word she thought, what weight was deadweight? She felt almost euphoric now, the early morning cigarette pumping carbon monoxide into her brain and giving her that slightly dopy, high feeling that all smokers love and hate. Wandering to the edge she closed her eyes to squeeze a tear down her cheek, letting it hang on her tired chin before dropping onto the balcony. Looking out she thought about her life and how little it was worth, just a little more now, stepping closer to the edge, looking out and then down. The glass would not bounce on the balcony, it shattered, not fragmenting, just breaking in half, a few shards scattered around the balcony.
Sally looked down again, four floors below at the ground. She gazed, surprise and natural fear shook her as she took in the twisted body below her, the gold necklace glittering in the sunlight, the unstaring eyes gazing back up at her, the arms flung wide and the leg hanging just a bit too far out to be right. The eyes seemed to be staring right back at Sally, daring her to join the cadaver on the ground, but stumbling backwards, Sally half-fell, half-sat on the balcony, not noticing the glass digging into her skin like miniature daggers, not noticing the puddle she sat in from the glass of water, and not noticing the dropped cigarette as it bounced on her leg, leaving a fresh burn before sizzling to rest. She hardly even noticed her scream, but others did, and after a phone call sirens pulled up to look at the girl on the ground with the big gold necklace round her neck, the pendant forming just one word – Jill.
Title: Killers Anonymous
Rating: PG-13 (could probably be lower but I guess there's a couple of adult themes "hinted" at.
Summary: I'm not going to summarise a story this short, there'd be no point reading the details then
Disclaimer: None of the characters or organisations are my own. The situations are, but the way the characters react are my interpretation of the characterisation from the show.
Disclaimer: None of the places mentioned are meant to be real, any similarity to hotel names is purely coincedental. Certain product names are taken from real products, and are used merely as props.
Think that covers just about everything, I enjoyed writing this so I hope you enjoy reading it, if the feedback is good I'll post the next part for you in a few days.
Geek point: I picked the name Gastrono because of its similarity with Nostromo (Google it if you don't recognise the name), just popped into my head, was unintentional.
Killers Anonymous by Iain Cartledge
===================================
09:48, Gastrono Hotel Room 448
The sun pierced through the little tears in the curtains, spiking onto Sally’s bloodshot eyes, looking straight ahead blankly, telling tales of the drinking from the previous night. The room embraced the aura of silence, only the occasional creaking spring disturbing the serenity of the scene.
Sally blinked, trying to flutter away the headache with her pretty eyelashes and to blind out the memories of the party, where she had swallowed too much champagne, and gambled too much money. But it was Vegas, she kept on telling herself, lying to herself that none of it mattered, but since her marriage had collapsed in the wake of Bill telling her about his affair with the gym instructor her life had been a spiral of downward decline, propped up by drinks and every opportunity to turn her wages into chips. What a mire of clichés she thought rubbing away the dust in her eyes and smudging black, powdery mascara onto her cheeks. She swung her hand to the table, flailing wildly as if it was an out-of-control sock, and half-cringed as she heard the glass tumble over and roll across the wooden surface. There was no point trying to stop it, and it would expend well needed energy that she would need to see herself through the day. She thankfully heard it hit the carpet with a dull thud, instead of the expected shattering and recommenced flailing until her hand finally grasped what she was looking for.
God, was it ten o’clock already? She usually woke up every two hours on the dot when she had been drinking, but maybe the champagne still had an effect on her where most drinks failed. Picking up the glass, she wandered through to the closet bathroom and poured herself a much needed glass of water. Her throat felt like someone had been sitting on her tongue sanding away all night. She lit a cigarette and sipped the water, smoke curling up towards the idle ceiling fan. It was time to find out what sort of day awaited her.
The bright light took her by surprise, another fine Nevada morning, basking the entire room in a glow of contentment and giving Sally a ghostly appearance, white, worn skin sagging around her eyes and worry lines clear to all on her forehead, mascara silhouetting her eyes and cheek bones like a movie villain. Maybe this was why she loved rooms several floors up, so that no-one would be able to see her with her early morning demeanour. With that lovely sound that every French door makes when it is opened, ending with a little squeak as the rubber meets the end of the rail, Sally stepped out onto the balcony. She could see all the way down to the Strip from here.
If things had worked out differently, maybe she would have made something with her life, or had a son or a daughter, with a wonderful husband and a big house, but things worked out bad, and now, the balcony looked attractive, the railings beckoned to her, flaking rust-coloured paint drawing her close. Taking a long drag on her cigarette she could imagine it being her last, it would be so easy, just walk to the edge, climb up and then just close her eyes and drop deadweight. What a strange word she thought, what weight was deadweight? She felt almost euphoric now, the early morning cigarette pumping carbon monoxide into her brain and giving her that slightly dopy, high feeling that all smokers love and hate. Wandering to the edge she closed her eyes to squeeze a tear down her cheek, letting it hang on her tired chin before dropping onto the balcony. Looking out she thought about her life and how little it was worth, just a little more now, stepping closer to the edge, looking out and then down. The glass would not bounce on the balcony, it shattered, not fragmenting, just breaking in half, a few shards scattered around the balcony.
Sally looked down again, four floors below at the ground. She gazed, surprise and natural fear shook her as she took in the twisted body below her, the gold necklace glittering in the sunlight, the unstaring eyes gazing back up at her, the arms flung wide and the leg hanging just a bit too far out to be right. The eyes seemed to be staring right back at Sally, daring her to join the cadaver on the ground, but stumbling backwards, Sally half-fell, half-sat on the balcony, not noticing the glass digging into her skin like miniature daggers, not noticing the puddle she sat in from the glass of water, and not noticing the dropped cigarette as it bounced on her leg, leaving a fresh burn before sizzling to rest. She hardly even noticed her scream, but others did, and after a phone call sirens pulled up to look at the girl on the ground with the big gold necklace round her neck, the pendant forming just one word – Jill.