DoreenCSI and csi_fanatic87 and my brother Alexander !! Thank you very much to correct my fanfic !! That was condemned nice of you !!! Because english is only my second language, so I'm not perfect And this is my first story. I hope, you like this... Flack and his mother It was Saturday and Detective Don Flack had a day off. A day without murders, dead bodies, scenes or long interrogations was great. Thus he finally had enough time to buy new clothes like ties and shirts for example. A little later was he in the new store in town and saw the battalion of men clothes all over. Flack suddenly heard a voice coming from the background, which he knew well. It was his mother.....Mrs. Donna Flack. “Shit.” Is what he thinks in this moment. “Honey, I mean Donald, what are you doing here ?” "I could ask you the same, mom.” "I‘m here to buy some new clothes for your father.” “Oh. Is he good ?” “Yes. Like always. He has his good and bad days.” “I know.” "It's good that we meet so could we could do some shopping together. What you think?" Actually Flack didn't feel like shopping with her, but he couldn't say no to his mother. “Sure.” “Great.” An older salesman to them and asked the both: “Can I help you?” “Yes,” answered Mrs. Flack. “I‘m looking for good ties for a couple of decent-looking ties for my young son. You must know, that he a Detective of the NYPD but he can't even dress himself up properly.” “Oh my god,” thought Flack, embarrassed. It was always terrible shopping with his mother and this was one of the reasons why. “Mom, you're embarrassing me,” he muttered, his face red. “OK. I’ll say no more words.” “Thanks.” “And which color are you thinking of?”, asked the salesman to Mrs. Flack. “Oh, good, now that you've mentioned it; did you know that my son is color blind?" “No, I’m sorry," said the salesman, almost smiling in amusement. “Mom!" said Flack, feeling even more embarrassed. "Why? But it's true." “I'm not color blind!" “Just look at your work clothes; they're horrible!” “Why did you say that ?” “Your clothes are so ugly that even your father dresses better. You should take some tips from him.” “Never” “Don’t say that." “Easy for you to say.” “But your outfit is…. I can’t find the right words for this.” “If I wanted to look like Sunny Crockett from the TV show Miami Vice, I could. But I'd rather be an underwear model than be him." “Good idea. Just quit the police and become a famous model.” “Are you kidding me !?” “No. I mean this seriously.” “Oh god , mom ! Have you lost your mind ?” “Not the slightest. Why are you asking me that ?“ "Nothing," he muttered. All this while the salesman stood beside them and listened amusely to the mother and son. “Excuse me. Do you still need my help?” “No, thank you”, said Flack. “I've had enough for today.” ”Don!” said Mrs. Flack indignantly. Now has Flack has had enough of all. “Mom ! Shut up !” ”Donald Flack Junior ! Where are your good manners ?” “I don’t know; must have flew out of the window," said Flack sarcastically. “Excuse me”, said the salesman. “I would say, we have some wonderful ties on sale. I can show you them if you like." Flack couldn’t believe that the salesman was still there trying to sell him something. Since his mother had recently annoyed him because of his outfits, disgracing him up to all bones. He couldn’t remain in the store another second. He was about to loose his temper. “One more word about ties and I’m forced to take you to the police station. There you’ll get a nice cell full of prisoners to who you may sell your ties. Did I make myself clear?“ The salesman winced. He looked at Mrs Flack with a terrified gaze and asked quakily: “Is he serious about that?” “No. Of course not.” “Allright.” “I must apologize for my young son. He didn’t mean any offense.” ,,Donald, tell the gentleman that you are sorry.” ,,No mother, I won’t.” ,,Honey! You shame me!” “And just for you to know: I’m off.” He turned and left the store. His mother stayed behind dumbfounded. Outside he tried to clear his thoughts. He urgently needed a cup of coffee. So he went to the next coffee shop, sat down and ordered a strong coffee. A few minutes later the waitress brought the hot coffee. “Hey, Flack!” He turned around and saw his best friend Danny Messer standing next to him. “Hi Danny! I’m surprised to see you here.” “Me too.” “Take a seat please“ „Thanks.“ He sat down and ordered a coffee. “Why are you here?” “Because of the coffee. And you?” “I wanted to buy new clothes.” “So?” “I met my mother. It was the most terrible day of my life. She’s so crazy and awkward. You wouldn’t believe what I’ve been through.” “The way you look, I can imagine” he said and laughed. “I don’t find this funny.” “I know. Don’t take it personally.” “Ok, just go on making fun of me. I can still bear it.” “Don’t be silly, I’m only joking.” “I know, but my mother drove me crazy.” “Yeah, I see your point.” “Wait a moment. I need to visit the restrooms.” “Ok.” He got up and went towards the bathroom. When he returned to Danny a short while later, he almost jumped out of his skin because the front door opened, revealing his mother. She took a brief look and saw her son sitting in a back corner with another man. “Donnie, I’m back again.” Danny turned his head a saw the old lady, who was approaching them directly. ,,Hey, Flack. You know that woman? Maybe it’s your girlfriend?” “No! It’s my mom. Damn!” Now she was there again. It was an endless nightmare. “Hi Honey! Finally I’ve found you. No big deal.” “Great.” As Danny heard Flacks nickname, he couldn’t help himself but to grin. It was too funny. “And who is the other man here?” “That is my best friend and colleague Detective Danny Messer.” He got to his feet and they shaked hands. “Good afternoon, Mrs…..” “Flack, Donna Flack. I’m his dear mother.” “I am pleased to make your acquaintance. Sit down please.” “Thanks. You are so nice.” Flack was short of a mental breakdown, his mom knew no mercy. “You know that Donald is quite vain?” “No”, Danny answered. “Because it’s not true”, said Flack. “What about the contacts you prefer over glasses because of your wonderful blue eyes? “Mom, please don’t!” “Oh.” Danny was surprised. “You carry contacts? I didn’t know about that.” “Yes, it’s true.” “But why?” “I’m very short-sightend.” “A long time already?” “Yes. My whole life.” “That’s right”, said Mrs. Flack to Danny. “I remember well. He got his first glasses at the tender age of seven, when he came to school. Before I forget, I still have a photo of him in my purse from his first school day. Do you want to see it?” “Of course.” “Please don’t, not that photo”, lamented Flack. “I look so ugly on the picture.” “No, my son. I find you so very sweet on this. Your friend may see it.” She took the picture from her purse and handed it over to Danny, who bursted out laughing. “Flack, I must say, you are really cute on this photo. And with glasses look you so honest. Thanks for the picture, Mrs. Flack.” “No matter. And did you know that he always had a doll with red curls to play with. I mean, when he was still a child?” “No.” He looked over Flack inquiringly. Only the Imagination of him playing with a doll was funny. “Yes”, she said. “Her name was Cindy and he took the doll with him all over the place. He even washed her hair, because his greatest wish always was to become hair-dresser one day.” “What must I hear about you? You never wanted become a detective?” “Danny, you must not believe everything what my mother tells you.” “Why”, Mrs. Flack answered somewhat offended. “I only said the truth.” “Yes, of course, mom…” he rolled his eyes. “Donnie!”, she admonished him. “Don’t talk to me like that. If your father would hear that! I’m still your mother. “Unfortunately.“ “What is that supposed to mean?” “Just what it means.” “And that is?” “You are incredible. Whenever we meet with other people you have to disgrace me in front of them. I hate that.” “I don’t see it that way.” “But I do. And that’s quite hard.” “Hard for you?! You’re nuts! I think you urgently need a psychiatrist.” “You, too.” “Donald!” Before he could say anything further, his mobile rang. “Flack…. Hello Mac. Yes, I understand. I’ll come with Danny immediately. See you later. Bye.” “Danny, that was Mac. He needs us both. A murder in the hotel.” “Okay, Flack. Then we should hurry.” Even though it was his free day, he was happy about the call. It was the only way he could get away from his mother. “Sorry, mother. Duty calls.” With these words they left before Mrs Flack could add anything. She stayed behind and scowled. FIN
Thanks so ! At the moment it's a oneshot story, but maybe I write more... I need at first a few new good ideas...
OH! wow, that would be totally embarassing, poor Flack. That was very very good, you are a good writer! I couldn't tell that you were ESL, it was really that good!
Yay! You finally posted it! :lol: Glad to check it out for you though I was rather slow in doing it... Anyway, good job. Keep it up.
No, Doreen. You was not to slow... It's all perfect and you was condemned good in the correction ! Thanks so.