Let's Talk Gay

yesterday, like every day, this guy came up to me and kept asking if levon and i were dateing and i screamed YES!!! at him...it was funny because he wasn't expecting that answer . then he kept asking if we were lesbian or straight...hmmm i wonder

 

I just had to pretend I thought my friends boyfriend was hot because she doesn't know I'm gay. Then she kept pointing out weird things and I was like "Yeah, that's cute" and I was like uhhh....:lol:

I mean, I would tell her I was gay but we've had conversations about gay people and I don't know if she really likes them. And most people are saying "don't be friends with her then" But she's a really good friend...and I don't want to lose her.

 

From the sound of it I would say you should just tell her CatherineWillows (sorry I didn't catch your real name). I had a similar fear with one of my friends but she took it surprisingly well. We weren't as close as it sounds you two are though.

If you don't want to tell her you could use the ever brilliant text message/email plan. Tell them over email or text then if they take it badly you can just say your friend stole your phone and sent it. See fool proof!

 

Nice idea, Laetri. Done something similar on a different matter, always fun to confuse people on messenger :lol:

Anyways, I don't believe coming out to a friend is best done over mails or something. It's a personal affair, a good friend might feel mistrusted or offended if you can't even tell them to the face.
I know that my best friend was sort of disappointed in me when I only officially came out to her after she asked me straight on. We had been drunk and she overheard me talking to my girlfriend on the phone. She was like "You could've just told me."
I got the same reaction from another friend, one who I wasn't that close to. I hadn't really been hiding it, it just never really came up. Then she just asked me one day and I told her "yes". She said I should have told her before.
After that I basically came out to most people that I know, it's not like I went all "Hey, I'm gay, just so you know" but I've been more open about comments I made and such.
One thing that I've learned is that if your friends love you and care about you they won't react badly. But if they do, that should be reason to reflect on that friendship and ask yourself how deep and real it was in the first place.

 

I got that same sudjestion when I didn't know how to tell Allie I liked her. :lol: In the end I did end up telling her over a PM, but I wasn't planning to tell her that my friend wrote it. :lol:

I don't know what to do really, it's because like everytime I talk about my gay friends liking me but I don't like them back she always goes "isn't that a good thing?" and one day I brought up a show about lesbians or something and she's like "why do you watch that sh*t, that's sick" but I don't know, I mean I can't keep it a secret for forever...I just wish this was a lot easier...haha, but since when has life been easy?

Hmm, today my friend was like "if you had to pick one of the guys in this class to go out with who would it be" and I was like uhhh...the conversation went on like this:

Me: This doesn't apply to me...
Friend: Yes it does
Me: NO...it really doesn't
Friend: Yes it does...PICK!
Me: I can't...this doesn't apply to me
Friend: PICKK!!!!
Friend that randomly through herself into the conversation: Can I tell her?
Me: Eh, I guess so
Random Friend: She's a lesbian you idiot!
Firend: What the hell?
Other random person that I don't even know that threw herself into the conversation: How is that "what the hell?"
Friend: I don't know...I never met a lesbian before...

That was an odd conversation...and there was a lot of random people in it :lol: Yes, this friend still talks to me, she started talking to me about getting drunk after :lol: (I don't know, haha)

 

Yeah I kinda don't ocme out to people really. The only person I ever formally told was my best friend and I didn't like it very much. It is a lot easier to just assume people already know then act like it is no big deal. It avoids many awkward situations. Just today my sister goes "are you straight" and I'm like "no, are you?" (it took her long enough too, on halloween me and Ceili and Noam were all talking about the stupid people who hadn't figured it out yet) and it was no big deal.

I don't usually use the text/email thing but we actually did it in the same way you did CWs, except we ended up having to send the text for my other friend because he was too scared.

Oh and does anyone know where Jayne is, I haven't seen her here since I got back.

 

It's been a while since i posted... but i've been do did the online thing over the summer- amazing girl, loved her! Anyway, my whole family is gay - well my mother, her g/f's son a.k.a. my step brother, my "real lil brother", and two of my aunts. If i added the extended family this would be a never ending post.

I have a point here... you see my grandmother has three gay daughters and to gay grandchildren and even though she says all of us are straight but my one aunt she has welcomed the people we "like or love" into her house. My first g/f i never told my family about... i just recently brought a girl around that i was interested in, my family took to her well... she wasn't over her ex, so ya'll know how that ended. Anyway, my father had got on my lil bro's case about him and girls and told my brother he better not be gay... i sorted it all out and thought i had come out to him at the same time- i think he's in denial. But, my aunt read myspace profile and found out about me and my brother... she didn't freak, she didn't talk about it, but was very civil about it.

For the most part, if you're comming out remember, you are who you've always been and being gay was just something you kept to yourself.

-- i can ramble like the best of them!

Love to those who are having problems

 

That is a good qustion! I wonder where Jayne went...Hmmm

I don't have anybody that's gay in my family, besides me. I guess at one point my cousin said that she was bi...but then decided that she liked guys more. So it's just more difficult for me to tell family. If my aunt would ever return my calls I'd tell her, but she still hasn't returned any of my phone calls!

 

Queer family sounds fun...sort of.

I have a distant relatives who's out (My mother's cousin's daughter), I've never met her but my mother told me after she suspected I was gay, think she was trying to get me to "confess".
She also thinks my cousin is gay...I'm not so sure about her but she might. We're not that close...

My grandma thinks I'm turning my sister into a lesbian with the music I hear and the stories I tell her...as if it would work that way
She's 8 by the way. Just because she was the only one in the family who got to know my (ex)girlfriend (something she let slip some time ago) doesn't mean I'm infecting her with the gay-virus...jesus, my granny has a weird imagination...

 

I think having a gay family would be fun! And a lot easier to tell them that you were gay :lol:

Haha, I wish I could tell my family. To difficult, and then going through the various stages of, ew, I don't believe you, we didn't raise you like that etc. etc.

 

Haha, today I had the most interesting day.

First I was sitting in one of my classes and we were "quietly writing" and this one guy was like "I heard Levon was gay" and then I kept mouthing "I heard that" until I accidently like yelled it :lol:

Then later on this guy that I know like put his arm on his shoulder and said "hey baby" (He always does that) and I turned around said "I wouldn't do that to a gay girl" and then like six people turn around "SHE'S A LESBIAN" :lol: I just rolled my eyes and walked away. Haha.

 

Haha that is funny CatherineWillows.

People in my school are so weird, i cant go a day without being called lesbian or a fag ( what a mean word!) or emo! People in my school (some of them) have no respect. They make fun of people that happen to be my friends just because of there sexuality, it makes me feel sad for them.
What hurts the most is that i get made fun of just because my older brother is gay! But i dont care because i love my brother and i love my friends!

 

Being harrassed b/c you're gay is against the law... i know a kid who suid the local high school b/c no one stopped the harrasment. I'm not sure how college would work... i always figured people grew up a bit more so the "teasing would stop". But if you're still in high school, bring it to the attention of the staff and if it doesn't stop, keep track of everything that happens.

Having a gay family is ok... i'm the oldest kid in the family... and more reserved than the rest of my sibilings when it comes to bringing people home. My step brother brings home a new boy every time he visits- which isn't a good impression on my lil brother.

When i told my mother i was gay the first thing she said to me was "you're never having kids"- i always told her she shouldn't of had me or my brother, but that was b/c of her g/f not b/c she was gay. I still wish my mother would find someone else. My mother is an amazing person, but her g/f likes to control everything, inculding my mother. And i'm an independent chic, so that doesn't fly with me. Yet another reason we never got along, she could never control me.

 

Yeah, I guess it would be discrimination wouldn't it? I mean, it doesn't overly bother me that people like to bug me about it, it's actually kind of funny how pathetic they are. I mean, if that's what you find fun, it just shows you that you're a loser.

Haha, I thought they would grow up too :lol:

I hate controlling people. I couldn't handle that in a realtionship, being controlled, ew.

 

I don't think it's right to control others.

Okay yesterday i was sitting in a class and this guy i sometimes talk to came up to me and was like ' there's a rumor going aroung that you're gay' and i was like 'i don't give a danm' and then he said ' you shouldn't, i don't believe the rumor though because i haven't heard it from you're mouth' i thought it was really nice of him. But he's like the only person who doesn't think i'm gay, i've given up denying it at school, now i just say 'yes' casually and walk away.