The Rant and I Cannot Say This Out Loud #3

Dear professors,

Would it be so hard to post grades from the finals we took two flipping days ago?! Some of us actually turned in all our work on time and compete. It would be amazing to be rewarded with our grades being posted then you can take care of the people who haven't turned half their crap in. Oh and the perfect attendence better be added in those classes which have it specified in the syllabus...some days that was the only thing driving myself and others to show up...we wanted the bonus points!

 

B:

I love you.
Please be safe and have fun, relax in NOLA. Know that I love you and I miss you desperately and I can't wait til you're back home, and I can't wait to get that text that you're drinking the Hurricane you promised me. I'm sending kisses. <3

I love you with my entire heart.

 

To my oh so lazy co-workers: Yes I understand you as pissy about having the hours cut by the very upper management, I am too. Though you are still in high school and only pay for gas, clothes, and whatever else you buy. I pay for college by myself therefore if I have more hours than you it's nothing to complain about. And that doesn't mean because you are mad about the hours that you can slack off and do nothing while the rest of us bust arse. Next thing you know you won't have a job and cannot afford your precious $85 jeans. So suck it up and deal, the economy is getting better but it's not going to happen over night.

To my friend W: Really do you not get the subtle and not so subtle hints I have been laying out? I do not like you the way you like me, that should be obvious by me not asking if you wanted to attend the last musical I was in. Whenever you came to the show over the summer it was so awkwardly unbearable I couldn't take it. Even though I didn't like D crying because of an unnamed reason at least comforting her took away some of the weirdness. Honestly how many more short answers do I need to give till you get the hint...arg!

 

KL,

It's not funny. To be honest, I never thought it was funny (though of course we all sometimes joke about it). Your puerile antics drive me crazy and I don't want to put up with them anymore. I'm not saying I don't want to put up with YOU anymore, but I AM saying that you need to modify your behavior. You're an adult. You've been an adult (at least in the legal sense) for the better part of 4 years. You can't keep doing this.

No, you can't blame TM for what you did last night/this morning. You came out of the establishment and sprinted in the exact opposite direction of where we needed to go without any provocation from TM or any of the rest of the group. You did it because you knew someone would follow you, would spoon-feed you the attention you want so badly, would chase you down and "save you". Jo did chase you down, and then you sprinted away again. So don't blame TM for the way you took off for a THIRD TIME because I happen to know that you were already in a "sprinting" mood.

Yes, I know TM said something hurtful to you... because he was about 12 shades of drunk at the time. Drunk people are known to say stupid things, so it's generally not wise to react to a surly "f**k off" from a thoroughly inebriated person by heeding the invective they've hurled at you!!!

You know what else you can't blame on TM? The way you dropped all of your possessions in front of us before you took off down the sidewalk and disappeared into the darkness. We had no way to contact you because we had your phone. We had your purse, your ID and EVERYTHING. You didn't even have your damn sweater anymore. You made yourself totally helpless before taking off and leaving SIX OTHER PEOPLE to wonder if we would have to wait all night for you to wander back to us.

Here's the "best" part, though, KL - once you finally wandered back, once we caught up to you, you acted hurt and betrayed when AC and I told you that it WASN'T FUNNY, that this crap needs to stop. You brought up the death of your mother... and I know that the death of a loved one can twist you into knots, that it can leave you hollow and desperate and confused, but there have to be healthier ways to deal with it. You can't keep doing these reckless, dangerous things, expecting us to follow after you, to catch you, to bring you back, to give you an enabling pat on the back, to sweep your unacceptable behavior under the rug. SD lost her mother less than a year ago and I'm sure it's just as painful for her, but she's functioning, she's getting along. I'm not trying to turn this into a competition, a "who-can-be-more-well-adjusted" contest, but you should recognize that people can cope with these tragedies without being self-destructive. You need to recognize your behavior as self-destructive and talk to someone about it! You need HELP! And you can't expect us to continue to suffer your "shenanigans" in the meantime!

It just occurred to me - the "best" part wasn't you acting as though we'd punched you in the gut by confronting you about your childishness. The "best" part was your refusal to get into the car. You insisted on staying on M. Avenue by yourself and waiting for your father, who was at least 45 minutes away, to pick you up (because apparently you had no money left and wouldn't take cab money from us). You insisted that you were disowning all of us as friends and that you never wanted to so much look at us again, and nothing I said, not even my assurance that you could still hate us as much as you liked, would get you into the car. I couldn't bodily drag you into the vehicle (because that'd be kidnapping), so I had to leave you there. It was 3:30am and there were 5 other drunk people who were NOT going to wait patiently for your father to show up.

I had to leave you there. ALONE.

All because YOU did something spectacularly stupid and then didn't enjoy being told as much.

So............. if you need to disown everyone and take a "vacation" from social life, fine. Try to fix your problems on your downtime, OK? Because like I said, I don't want to deal with your little outbursts anymore. I'm not disowning you like you're claiming to disown me, but I am disowning your inappropriate behavior.

Get yourself right and then come back.

 

Castiel's Angel: We should so talk..I have a 'friend' who sounds like the one you described...YIKES. Hope that improves; I had to ditch my friend in order for them to stop their "who's life is worse" competition, and it STILL continues occasionally. It sucks.

B:
GOD it's been less than 24 hours and I MISS YOU like insanely! It's incredibly difficult to not hear your voice or to get your emails...I'm missing some part of my heart, baby! Gooood it's torture...I'd rather lose appendages than have you gone for two flipping weeks...It's gonna be the hardest thing I have ever done...being without you. *sigh*
I'm SO glad you emailed from Cincy- just the fact I knew your flight had made it at lesat that far, and that you were still thinking about me, despite the fun you're about to have, made me feel better, and temporarily relieved some of the pain of missing you. And for the record, I do NOT care about our age difference..You've been through so much hell in your life between military and the rest, and I have finally found a man I love...someone who may be several years my superior, and even intellectual superior, but I LOVE you. And I LOVE that I get you next semester and I LOVE that you're in my life. I don't give a rat's a** what anyone thinks- administration, friends, colleagues who work with you, I don't care. I KNOW I love you, and I know you're learning how to love me.
I. Love. You. and don't you EVER forget it. And I'm expecting that text message and/or phone call any day now... I love you, and I miss you.

 

To P.

So we ended up having a few too many drinks. That doesn't change the fact that we had a damn good time. I have absolutely no intention of feeling guilty or bad, and neither should you. We're both adults here, and we did nothing wrong. Plus, we served a good cause, drunk out of our minds or not

To my Literary Theory book:
You're a contradictio in terminis. There's nothing scientific about literature. It's just a bunch of quotes by people who have too much time on their hands

 

To my best friend.

Why do u keep on ignoring me these days? is our friendship doesn't mean anything to you? Okay, I have to admit that I see you more than just a best friend these months. it's been a long time I think. and I consider myself stupid and silly, coz I myself dunno why I'm so patient to face these situations between us. since I texted the wrong message to you and you know about it, you've been ignoring me and we're getting farther away day by day.
And I mad a decision to end this. I try not to be selfish and I really wanna forget all this lovey-dovey stuff for you. Well, you deserve someone prettier, smarter, and more fashionable than me, and someone who can keep up with your lifestyle. I know that I have to forget all this if I want to keep our friendship lasts. and I TRY. I do the 'fangirling' everyday just not to remind me of you. I try to be normal before ur face. though you don't know how much I bleed inside. but I'd rather lose my heart than lose my best friend.
How could you not understand that? Please be the old you. I miss US.

 

B:
Hi, baby!
I miss you, I miss you, I miss you..It still makes me sick to my stomach, although I'm starting to envision you jumping into the Gulf to go diving like you were so anxious to do, and the smile and freedom I know you feel, and I feel a little better.

K's going after us, again...she doesn't know you, she doesn't know anything about you, and she can't trust that, despite the age difference (who the HECK cares!?), you are a good man and that we feel for each other. She's sympathetic that I miss you, but it's like she dosen't accept that we're together..I don't know, I'm not seeking her approval by any means, but it's hard enough to be quiet about this stuff without her being iffy about it. *sigh* I just need your reassuring smile back...and your laugh- GOD I miss your contagious laugh!

I got your Christmas present yesterday- I know how much you adore green tea so I splurged on the good stuff. I'll bring you some with your (nasty) Pepsi One when you come home...in way too long from now. But I'm sure you'll be thrilled

I LOVE you and I miss you.

<3

 

KL,

You "don't want to talk about/can't talk about/won't talk about" anything that happened between the time you ran off and the time you came back, and anything that happened after we left you alone on M. Avenue? REALLY???

You're apologizing to everyone (which is great), you're acknowledging that you did something stupid (which is also great), and oh, yeah, you're still being incredibly dramatic and attention-seeking about it (uh... not great). You're refusing to talk about it because it's CLEARLY far too painful and harrowing for you to discuss, right? Right?

Wow.

You still haven't figured it out.

We're sick of this. We're completely and utterly fed up with this... this... manufactured melodrama. You want to apologize to us, mend fences and all that, but at the same time you want to ratchet up the mystery of the whole incident, make it seem as though you were severely traumatized, so that even after you acknowledge you've done something insensitive and juvenile, we'll treat you as though you're made out of glass.

KL......

STOP IT!!!!!!!!!

It's all the same tired song and dance. You do or say SOMETHING inappropriate to draw attention to yourself. Sometimes it makes us laugh (like when you jumped into a dumpster). Sometimes it makes us roll our eyes (like when you make sh*t up for no good reason, for example your story about "almost being kidnapped" and your story about "getting locked in your trunk"). Sometimes it pisses us off (like when you ran off without your purse & phone and we couldn't find you for the better part of an hour). Sometimes it's supposed to make us pity you (like your pointed refusal to discuss your "alone time" the other night).

You don't have to do this! We really do like you..... when you're not pulling a stunt, embellishing a story, scattering eggshells for us to walk on, etc.

I actually thought your self-imposed vacation from social life would be a good thing for you. I'm disappointed that you're jumping right back into the same undesirable behaviors that got you into this mess in the first place.

And as long as you "don't want to talk about it", I don't really feel like talking to YOU.

 

B:
I miss you more and more everyday. Kate and I had a LONG talk last night, and I'm ready to take us to the next level....a huge commitment, but I KNOW we are both ready. You ARE my forever and I'm ready to show you that.
I love you more than I love everything else and everyone else in my life.
Please be safe...and I love you...know you love me too, and what a precious gift that is.

 

Minus the text I have the exact thing going on... It's NOT fun... I feel your pain dear. *Hugs*

 

Alright, listen up Mother Nature!

I'm tired of this freezing weather! This is the THIRD friggin' winter like this and I'm DONE WITH IT!

I don't want single digit temperatures with a windchill that is below zero degrees fahrenheit. :scream:

Enough already! I suggest you get your act together and warm this place up!!!!!!!

Oh, my dog isn't happy either, because he don't get his walks! When he's not happy he let's me know and that doesn't make me happy either!!!!!

So make it 30 degrees or above, or so help me, YOU'RE FIRED!

 

To whoever stole the salt off of my front porch,I hope you fell on the ice as you left.

blackflag,I love your banner.