From the Mouth of High School

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous' started by araSgerG, Sep 18, 2006.

  1. araSgerG

    araSgerG Lab Technician

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    Now that my school's back in session I'm posting more again...I'll post my stuff weekly so it won't look the same as last year's stuff.

    Monday, August 20

    Biology
    -Taylor: Why would you miss more than 7 days of school?
    -Walker: I'll laugh when Taylor misses, like, 20 days.
    -Me: I'll suspect Walker when Taylor misses 20 days.

    Band
    -Mr. Mitchell: Matthew didn't like the trombone. Who does? No one likes the trombone ! Ah! Chad! Chad likes the trombone! David likes the trombone! How 'bout you, Jeremiah?
    -Jeremiah: Uhhhh...heh heh heh....


    Tuesday, August 21
    Algebra
    -Mrs. Perry: You must participate! If you are well enough to come to school, you are well enough to participate!
    -Matt: No.
    -Mrs. Perry: Yes.
    -Matt: I'm sick, I can't do math.
    -Mrs. Perry: Then go home.
    -Matt: I can handle that.

    -Mrs. Perry: Did everyone get 27?
    -Kaleb: If we didn't will we be punished?

    -Matt: I have to have a calculator...it's like breathing.
    -Mrs. Perry: Yeah, breathing is good.

    -Mrs. Perry: Do you remember back in 3rd grade...or 4th grade...or 5th grade, or 6th grade, or 7th grade, when they tried to teach you fractions and they gave up and gave you a calculator?

    -Mrs. Perry: I'll teach this to you some more later.
    -Matt: Good, 'cause I'll be here all year...and probably next year.

    -Mrs. Perry: If I'm planning on teaching you from a book, you'll probably need a book.
    -Matt: Noooo!!!

    -Mrs. Perry: Go to Section 1-3.
    -Matt: But we only have 20 minutes left.
    -Jon: Can't we start next week?

    -Mrs. Perry: Do you need more practice at this?
    -Matt: Yes, let's do more of it...tomarrow.

    Biology
    -Dustin: Are we gonna go back and distroy the lab- I mean, tour it?

    -Mrs. Douglas: Okay, this is the fire extinguisher.
    -Jeremiah: Not the eyewash station.

    -Charlee: You usually play 'Never Have I Ever' with shots of alcohol.
    -Buster: So, what do you play it with? Kool-Aid?
    -Walker: No way! We're hard-core! We play with Mountain Dew! It was like, 'Oh, god, not another!'.
    -Jeremiah: You should play with ammonia...that would last, like, eight seconds.
    -Buster: I wanna play!
    -Charlee: You can't.
    -Buster: Why not?
    -Jeremiah: We don't have any bleach.

    English
    -Mrs. Miers: Don't go to this website, any little 3rd or 4th grader can stick stuff up on it...although I did like the litte cartoon...let's go back to that. OH! It's a Zwinky!...Let's put some clothes on her.
    (Puts the shirt on the Zwinky like pants)

    Spanish
    -Mrs. Hutchings: This is free writing. Write words, phrases, sentances. You can write whatever you feel like. Your options are as open as the sky...I feel like we should all meditate after I said that...

    Wednesday, August 22
    Algebra
    -Mrs. Perry: Fix it!
    -Melissa: I'm trying, but I'm stressing!
    -Matt: Chill, Melissa.
    -Melissa: You'd be stressing, too if you were setting at Mrs. Perry's desk...it eats things.

    -Mrs. Perry: HA! I was organized and I tricked you!

    -Mrs. Perry: We're going to work some equations today. You shouldn't have much of a problem. You worked out 3x+4+13 yesterday.
    -Jon: We're ready for the test!

    -Jon: Mrs. Perry, does this problem come out to an even number?
    -Mrs. Perry: Gosh...I sure hope it does...

    -Beverly: If you put it in your calculator it says 1.9!
    -Mrs. Perry: If you put it in your calculator it says 19!
    -Brooke: If you put it in your calculator it says, 'Give us our homework'!

    -Mrs. Perry: Oh! Important announcment! Please flush the commodes! There's a little handle on the side, if you push it down everything disappears!

    -Mrs. Perry: Students, Open House is this Thursday from 6 to 8, bring your parents. Give me something to do for 2 hours.

    English
    -Mrs. Miers: There's nothing we can do to help the other students, short of hooking them up to an I.V....I shouldn't have said that, should I? That was mean...I feel bad now. Bad teacher!

    -Mrs. Miers: (While the tornado sirens are testing) DUCK!!!

    -Mrs. Miers: I can't get this computer to workl!
    -Maggie: I hear they work if you throww them up against a wall.
    -Mrs. Miers: I've heard that, too.

    -Mrs. Miers: Your reports are due next Friday.
    -Maggie: By next Friday do you mean three days from now or-
    -Mrs. Miers: Your reports are due the Friday after this Friday, except for Maggie, her's is due tomarrow.

    -Mrs. Miers: (To her computer) You had better work or I'm done with you for the day!...I talk to things...Come on, baby!
    -Maggie: It sounds like she's gambling.
    -Mrs. Miers: Come on! Come on! Come on!...Is this it?! Is it it?! This is it! This is it! This is it!...I know what you're all thinking, 'What have we gotten ourselves into?'

    Spanish
    [Mrs. Free's classroom shares a wall with Mrs. Hutching's room]
    (We hear Mrs. Free yelling)
    -Mrs. Hutchings: That's kinda refreshing, I haven't hear Mrs. Free yell since last year.

    Thursday, August 23
    Algebra
    -Mrs. Perry: Melissa, go turn on the projector.
    -Melissa: Okay.
    (Melissa gets the remote to turn on the projector)
    -Kaleb: You have to stand on a desk.
    -Melissa:...No you don't.
    -Kaleb: I know, I just wanted to make you mad.

    -Mrs. Perry: So, half of the Algebra 2 test you have to take with out a calculator.
    -Matt: WHAT!?!
    -Mrs. Perry: Yeah, I know. I e-mailed the test-lady and said, 'You've been teaching us that since these kids were in Algebra 1 to give them a calculator. What's your reasoning?'...She didn't want to talk to me. So, we'll just keep teaching Algebra 2 the same way as always and the state department can just-
    -Matt: Suck on my toe!

    -Mrs. Perry: Why is there no solution?
    -Jeremiah: Because there's no negative outside the x box.
    -Me and Mrs. Perry: X-Box.

    -Melissa:...Do you have to pass a test to get into kindergarten?
    -Mrs. Perry: You have to take a test, you don't have to pass it. They had you, like, draw pictures.
    -Matt: I remember, they made you go out on the playground and do jumping-jacks and crap.
    -Me: They made you skip, I had to practice skipping.
    -Jeremiah: Sounds like an alcoholics' test.

    -Jeremiah: I has no bat'trees.
    -Mrs. Perry: I has no bat'trees...the whole school has no bat'trees.

    -Mrs. Perry: I'm writing your homework on the wrong day, I've wrote it on the wrong day the whole week, why fix it now?

    Biology
    -Mrs. Douglas: Is everybody ready?
    -Ashley: No.
    -Mrs. Douglas: What's wrong?
    -Ashley: I can't find my safety symbols guide in my book...it's, like, it's just not there.
    -Walker: That's your geometry book.
    -Ashley: Oh.

    -Mrs. Douglas: Has everyone found Appendix B?
    -Jeremiah: I can't find the appendix, but I found the brain.

    [Mrs. Louks's room and Mrs. Douglas's room share a wall]
    (Hears someone yelling through the wall)
    -Jeremiah: Wow. Someone got a butt-chewing.
    -Mrs. Douglas: This is Mrs. Louks's planning period.
    -Maggie: Then that was Coach.
    -Josh: Should someone go see if they need medical attention over there?

    -Mrs. Douglas: The girl in the picture isn't wearing a heat-proof glove.
    -Josh: It might be on her other hand.
    -Me: What if she only has one arm, Josh?
    -Walker: HA!
    -Josh:...Then...I'd laugh at her...

    Band
    -Jessie: It sounds like a song!
    -Mr. Mitchell: It is a song.

    Friday, August 24
    Algebra
    -Kaleb: I bet he's gonna fill his boxing gloves with mercury.
    -Jon: You saw that on CSI, I saw that episode.

    -Kayla: Is that a strawberry-o on your finger-o?
    -Sara: Yeah, I'm married to Strawberry Shortcake's brother.
    -Brooke: Does she have a brother?
    -Kayla: She does now!

    -Blake G.:...But you don't have to do 33.
    -Jon: It's every third problem...how do you figure that you don't have to do 33 if we do 30?
    -Blake E.: Blake does ancient Chinese math.
    -Jon: Hey, Blake, wanna teach me this 'ancient math'?
    -Blake G.: Sure, stop at 30.

    -Blake E.: What did you guys get on number 30?
    -Kaleb: 18.
    -Blake E.: How?
    -Kaleb: Black magic.

    -Mrs. Perry: You'll have an end-of-course test in May.
    -Beverly: Well, I'm a Senior, so it doesn't matter.
    -Blake E.: Well, Beverly, you're a Senior in a Junior class, so...

    Biology
    -Dustin: Who was it that got their hand caught in the shark they were disecting's mouth?
    -Mrs. Douglas: I don't know, there've been so many.
    -Maggie: What happened?
    -Mrs. Douglas: Someone got their hand caught on the shark's tooh. I don't even think they were in it's mouth. they probably did it on purpose.
    -Maggie: Yeah, 'I got bit by a shark in Arkansas.'.

    -Jeremiah: If your name was Constantinople would you rather be called 'Constance' or 'Opal'?
    -Me: Hmmm...Turkey.
    -Jeremiah: What about 'Istanbul'?
    -Me: Yeah.

    Spanish
    -Mrs. Hutchings: Jeremiah, you're not supposed to be standing up.
    -Jeremiah: I'm looking for my pencil.
    -Mrs. Hutchings: You can do that setting down.
    -Jeremiah: This is true.
    -Kayla: Nuh-uh! Only a professional pencil-finder can find a pencil while setting down.

    -Kayla: I'm gonna be trained as a terrorist so I can find the terrorist.
    -Walker: I'd like to be trained as a terrorist...

    (Mrs. Hutchings plays a Cuban folk song)
    -Kayla: Ooh...this music moves my soul to dance.
    -Mrs. Hutchings: This version has two verses we don't have the words to.
    -Kayla: It could mean anything, it could mean, 'The rat runs through the room, runs up the tree...and gets eaten by a rabid squirrel!'

    -Mrs. Hutchings: What does encantada mean?
    -Walker: Enchanted.
    -Mrs. Hutchings: We're more likely to say, 'delighted'.
    -Walker: I say enchanted....like, 'That's enchanting'.
    -Mrs. Hutchings: How sweet!
    -Kayla: Yeah, and I eat flowers for breakfast.
    -Mrs. Hutchings: What?
    -Kayla: No, no, no, no...I don't eat flowers for breakfast and Walker doesn't say 'enchanted'!

    -Kayla: You make me giggle.
    -Walker: You make me Google.
     
  2. assumenothing

    assumenothing Rookie

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    My school isn't back in session yet, but people have been saying some amusing things around band camp...

    (I missed most of this conversation, but I walked into the band room the other day and heard this)
    Eric: It doesn't sound like anything that couldn't be solved with Pepto Bismol!

    (Someone in the flute line makes an odd noise)
    Caitlin: That sounded like Pikachu!
    Mindy: Pika-Pika!

    Eric: Where did all the clouds go?
    Joe *highly dramatic*: They died, Eric! They died!

    Chris, drum major: I just wanted to say something. Now, marching band is like a sandwich...
    Entire Rest of Band: No more analogies! Please, we're begging you!
     
  3. babylon5girl

    babylon5girl Hit and Run

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    This was last year at my school

    (In class we were talking about how we couldn't get enough reception on our cell phones to text in the luch room)

    Alex:....Wait does that mean that text go like...through the air? (At this point she waves her hand over the top of her cell phone like she is trying to feel the text come out) :rolleyes: :lol:

    Mind you I go to a private school...a private school that gets awards for academic excellence :rolleyes:

    Second story:

    On some of our school t-shirts this year they spelled the name of the school wrong, the school did, not the printing company.
     
  4. araSgerG

    araSgerG Lab Technician

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    Okay so my right hand is slightly out of commision, so forgive me of any spelling error.

    Monday, August 27
    Algebra
    -Melissa: I don't think there's any lead in my pencil...there isn't! That's sucky!

    -Blake E: ...so I told 'em to go to the Waffle House-
    -Melissa: Why would you suggest Waffle House when there's an IHOP right down the road?
    -Blake E: Hey! Hey! Hey! Waffle House is cheap, fast and friendly...like certain people I know.
    -Mrs. Perry: Blake!

    -Blake E: Why were the answers to these problems written so funny?
    -Mrs. Perry: I'll explain later.
    -Blake E: No! Don't explain it if we don't have to know it!

    -Mrs. Perry: Oh, I put the decimal point in the wrong place.
    -Kaleb: But we already wrote that whole thing...
    -Blake E: ...in pen.
    -Mrs. Perry: You're not supposed to use pens in my class.
    -Blake: Mrs. Perry, how many times do you think you have to tell me stuff for me to get it?
    -Mrs. Perry: Maybe this will make you get it.
    -Matt: D-Hall would work better.

    -Blake E: But, Mrs. Perry aren't we supposed to love everyone equally?
    -Mrs. Perry: ...You don't have to love all numbers equally.
    -Blake E: What about when thay throw letters in there? Are they the red-headed step-child of math?

    -Beverly: Mrs. Perry, why did we do that? I didn't think you needed to.
    -Blake E: Well, that's what you get for thinking, Beverly.

    Biology
    -Mrs. Douglas: Sign your lab contract.
    -Josh: How do we know that we're not, like, signing our souls over to you?
    -Me: That's why you learned to read, Josh. But you'll never have a real job or be a movie star so this is the only conract you'll have to read.
    -Josh: I'll laugh when I'm President. I'll be, like, 'Ha!'.
    -Me: Yeah, president of DENSA.
    -Charlee: Or McDonald's.

    -Charlee: I won the science fair is 6th grade. I did an experiment on probability that I got off The Price is Right. It was like a Plinko board, but I used jellybeans.
    -Me: You won the science fair with a Plinko board...I made a model Doppler RADAR and got beat by some little 5th grade that shined a flashlight through a prism!

    (About a frozen corpse)
    -Josh: That's a dead guy?
    -Walker: No, it's not.

    -Jeremiah: Here's our new Quiz Bowl slogan since we all blew off Chess Club for Quiz Bowl, 'Chess is the sport of kings, but Quiz Bowl is the sport of geeks which is a more accurate discription of us'.

    -Katie: 300 times 2 is around 600, right?
    -Dustin: Try, is 600.

    -Taylor: Walker, are you feeling okay? You looked really bad during 1st period.
    -Walker: Yeah, I'm fine now that I've puked everything up.

    -Josh: Wait! What?!
    -Me: Go back to sleep, Josh.
    -Josh: Okay.
    (Lays his head down on his desk)

    English
    -Katie: Can I use your hole-punch?
    -Mrs. Miers: If I can remember your name...is it Shelby?
    -Katie: I'm Katie.
    -Mrs. Miers: I was just testing to see if you knew it.

    -Mrs. Miers: I'm so tired of 7th graders. You have to tell them everything, 'Sit up. Now, breathe!'.

    -Mrs. Miers: Remember that Friday your book- your book dilly-whoppers are due.

    -Jeremiah: Five Star makes their note books out of weird materials.
    -Me: Like what?
    -Jeremiah: Paper.
    -Me: As opposed to?
    -Jeremiah:...Rock slab.

    Tuesday, August 28
    Algebra
    -Matt: Mrs. Perry, I called you last night at 11:30.
    -Mrs. Perry: I was awake then and I didn't get your call.
    -Blake E: Well, I was outside her window singing.
    -Jon: Really? Me, too. What time were you there?
    -Blake E: Twelve.
    -Jon: Oh, I had already left by then.
    -Mrs. Perry: Wow. I was reading then and missed the whole thing.

    -Mrs. Perry: The state gives us tests to see if you're doing your job.
    -Kaleb: Well, maybe I'd do it better if I got paid.
    -Mrs. Perry: You do get paid...in the future.
    -Kaleb: Well, I'd be more compelled to work hard if I got paid now.

    Band
    -Mr. Mitchell: Did anyone hear that line that the flutes played? Ben, do you know what that line's called?...One word...starts with 'm'...ends in 'y'...has 'elod' in the middle.

    Wednesday, August 29
    Algebra
    --Evan's poen #1--
    There once was a man named Phil
    He tried to roll down a hill
    He landed on a stick
    And hurt his FACE

    --Evan's Poem #2--
    There once was a man named Bob
    Who tried to eat corn-on-the-cob
    He bit into it once
    Chomped down like a dunce
    NOW HE'S DEAD!!!!

    -Matt: Where'd we get to yesterday? 20?
    -Beverly: Yeah, but we were just marking them A, B, C, D, Idon'tgiveacrap.

    -Brooke: Mrs. Perry's wearing heels...I'm scared.

    -Melissa: ARRRGH! MRS. PERRY!
    -Mrs. Perry: It's a plastic folder in the drawer labled 'Bible Club'.
    -Melissa: Which drawer?!
    -Mrs. Perry: I was gonna clean out this room over the summer, but-
    -Melissa: It didn't work!
    -Matt: You should just take everything in this room and burn it.

    -Matt: What's that word on your shoe?
    -Katarina(The German exchange student): Adidas.
    -Matt: No, not that word. I know Adidas, what's the word under it?
    -Katarina: It's the kind of shoe.
    -Matt: Oh, do we have them here?
    -Katarina: Huh?
    -Matt: Did you get those in Germany?
    -Katarina: Yeah.
    -Matt: But, do we have them in America?
    -Katarina: Yeah.
    -Matt: Oh.

    -Sierra: Your truck's not ugly.
    -Matt: Blake's? Have you seen it?
    -Sierra: The green one?
    -Matt: Yeah, it's the Screamin' Eagle!
    -Blake E: No...I got the screaming fixed.

    -Matt: No! You can't draw a shark eating my fish!...I'm gonna draw a whale eating your shark.
    -Jon: But, aren't whales vegitarians?
    -Matt: No! Shut up!...Here's my whale. It's got big teeth, and a big body and a giant tail!
    -Katarina: It's a monster.
    -Matt: Yeah, it's Nessie.

    -Matt: There, take that drawing home and put it up on your refridgerator. Then take it back to Germany and tell them this is how the Americans draw.
    -Katarina: It's art.
    -Matt: Yeah, it's art!...From the special school.

    Biology
    -Maggie: Guys, we've got Jr. Play next year.
    -Erin: Yeah, I know.
    -Maggie: We're old people!

    Spanish
    -Mrs. Hutchings: You can't say 'Its Tyler's backpack.' in Spanish. You have to say 'The backpack of Tyler'.
    -Jeremiah: THE BACKPACK OF TYLER!!!

    -Ashley: I was only supposed to work Monday and Friday, but they were like, 'Oh, you get to work Wednesday, too'.
    -Jeremiah: Good for you!

    -Walker: I drew my mom in a belly-shirt with a turtleneck.

    Thursday, August 30
    Spanish
    -Tyler: Okay, I've found a Spanish named for me...it's in the book.
    -Mrs. Hutchings: What is it?
    -Tyler: Like, el jaguar, or something.
    -Walker: Jaguar...that's English!
    -Jeremiah: Is it capitalized?
    -Tyler:...No...
    -Jeremiah: Then it's not a name!
    -Mrs. Hutchings: Thank you, Jeremiah.
    -Jeremiah: You depress me, Tyler.

    Friday, August 31
    Algebra
    (About a drawing of a walrus)
    -Blake E: Hey! That walrus has a nosering! Kick it out of school!

    -Mrs. Perry: Guys, if you know the correct answer and it's not one of the multiple choices then just write the correct answer in the blank.
    -Brooke: What if you're just guessin and you don't know the right answer?
    -Mrs. Perry: Then you're in bad shape.

    -Blake G: why don't these test give you the right answer as a choice?
    -Mrs. Perry: I don't know. They won't all be like that...at least I hope they won't.
    -Blake E: Watch some kid fail this class because the questions on the test don't have the right answers...
    -Mrs. Perry: Yeah, yeah, yeah...
    -Blake E: ...so he fails in life...
    -Mrs. Perry: Yeah, yeah, yeah...
    -Blake E: ...and dies a failure.
    -Mrs. Perry: Yeah, yeah, yeah...
    -Blake G: So, you've already got your life planned out, huh, Blake?
    -Blake E: Yup.

    -Mrs. Perry: Blake, Jon, shh!
    (They keep talking)
    -Mrs. Perry: Blake! Jon! I'm about to put you both in d-hall!
    (Blake points at Jon, as if to accuse him)
    -Mrs. Perry: Lay your heads down!
    -Blake E: F'real?!
    -Mrs. Perry: Yeah.
    -Blake E: Sweet!
    (They lay their heads down)

    Biology
    -Erin: You're scary.
    -Taylor: Your face is scary!
    -Erin: Your mom's face is scary!
    -Taylor: Uranus is scary! :lol:

    -Taylor: Erin. your hair is retarded.

    (Mrs. Douglas swings the power cord from the microscope off the stool and it hits the wall, that is shared with Mrs. Louks's room, hard)
    -Dustin: The first thing we will be viewing is Mrs. Louks's class through that new hole in the wall.

    -Buster: What if you were blind, deaf and mute?
    -Me: You'd be Helen Keller.
    -Buster: I wonder if there's someone like that?
    -Me: ...Helen Keller.

    -Buster: What if you were deaf, blind, mute and crippled?
    -Shelby: You'd be a vegetable.
    -Josh: No...vegetables can't pee.
    -Me: A medical vegetable, Josh, not like a tomato or a cucumber.
    -Jeremiah: Medical vegetable? Is that like the carrots they give you at the hospital?
     
  5. AshleyFirst223

    AshleyFirst223 Pathologist

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    Science:

    Teacher: Please take out your notes.
    Everyone gets them out.
    Teacher: Ashley, are you going to do this?
    Me: I'm not planning on it.
    Teacher: Well could you write this all down?
    Me: No, I'm physically unable to hold a pen.
     
  6. babylon5girl

    babylon5girl Hit and Run

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    Math:

    (while wtching Star Wars)
    alex: Was this filmed in space?
     
  7. Lizn8rFoxy

    Lizn8rFoxy Lab Technician

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    school = BLAH!
     
  8. babylon5girl

    babylon5girl Hit and Run

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    NO KIDDING!
     
  9. Calihan

    Calihan Captain

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    First day back today, and I was my normal smart ass self to my teachers.

    Ms S. If you want why don't you all go outside for a bit and socialize and catch up.

    Me. What happend to you over break which caused the 180 degree personalty change.

    Ms S. I'm buttering you up before I bring back my old personality.

    Me. Trust no one.

    (If you can't tell we kid around a lot so I know she wasn't offended)

    As we were having class discussions about the upcoming year.

    Ms D. There were studies done about the effectivness of having a way to handwrite on the same level as the rest of your body.

    Me. There were also studies done which

    Ms. D. (interupting me) Austin

    Writing assignment and all they wrote for our assignment was "Choose a writing prompt"

    On my computer I write "I choose prompt #1"

    Ms B. Austin write a page answering the prompt at your best.

    Scott. Austin remember what your best is, is in your eyes.
     
  10. NicksSexyBabe

    NicksSexyBabe Rookie

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    i'm glad that none of my teachers call me Meagan (kina like how in Fallin' Idols Nick says Megans name) because it bugs me because one of my teachers called me that all last year and i didn't like him as a teacher (not because he called me by the wrong name) but its okay if george says it that way :)
     
  11. sidlewannabee

    sidlewannabee CSI Level One

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    Some of my teachers give us nicknames. On the first day of school, my teacher called me blonde. I got used to it by now.
     
  12. araSgerG

    araSgerG Lab Technician

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    sidlewannabe, I love your icon!
    That's okay because on the second day of school our English teacher told us we all had great literary names ans then proceded to read our full names out loud to the whole class and speculate on what type of book we would be in and what are charicter would be like...it kinda creeped me out because almost everyone's 'book' involved a murder...I might post that sometime.


    Tuesday, September 4
    Algebra
    -Mrs. Perry: Turn to page 56.
    -Jon: Page 56?
    -Mrs. Perry: Yeah.
    -Jon: I can't go past 10.

    -Sierra: Should we write that down?
    -Matt: No. Just look at it.
    -Jon: Really hard.

    -Blake G.: Someone's knocking at the door.
    -Jon: Again.
    -Matt: This is a lost cause! We won't learn anything today!

    Biology
    -Mrs. Douglas: This next week is going to be crazy on me so it will reflect on you being crazy.
    -Jeremiah: I'm already crazy.
    -Sandra: I've seen crazier.
    -Jeremiah: I am insulted by this for some strange reason.

    Band
    (Ben holds up a tamborine without jingles)
    -Ben: This tamborine's lost all it's tambo!

    -Dustin: I'd leave unless you want to be drumstick girl for eyes.
    -Lindsey: What?
    -Me: Don't you mean 'drumstick for eyes girl'?
    -Dustin: Leave me alone, I'm man backward.

    Wednesday, September 5
    Algebra
    -Beverly: Well, Beverly's gonna be back in here next year.
    -Mrs. Perry: Well, that's okay. I like Beverly, she's good company.
    -Beverly: Yeah, well, Beverly doesn't like...math class.

    -Mrs. Perry: You've been drawing linear equations for two years, this year they'll be easier.
    -Jon: That's a good joke.

    -Blake: Mrs. Perry, did you eat ice cream for breakfast 'cause your heart is cold!

    Biology
    -Jeremiah: Not opening the door for a fellow student is one thing, noot opening the door for a teacher is like a hate crime.

    -Taylor: So, Erin, you'll style the hair and I'll cut it!
    -Maggie: Um...hello! Where does Maggie fit into this?
    -Erin: You can sweep the hair up.

    Thursday, September 6
    Algebra
    -Blake E.: Mrs. Perry, I like your shoes!
    -Mrs. Perry: Thanks, I'll let you borrow them sometime.
    -Jon: I've got a pair just like them.
    -Mrs. Perry: Really?

    -Sierra: I got that question wrong! And I asked Coach Hahn for help!
    -Kaleb: You asked Coach Hahn?
    -Sierra: Yeah.
    -Blake E: He's a basketball coach, he doesn't have to be smart1
    -Sierra: I think he told me the wrong answer on purpose.
    -Kaleb: Think?! I know he did!

    -Blake E: Mrs. Perry, Anthony is feeling discriminated against!
    -Mrs. Perry: Maybe you should stop calling him 'Kunta Kente'...unless you want me to call you 'D-Hall-ey'.
    -Blake E: ...Can I call him 'Toby'?
    -Mrs. Perry: Sure, if you want d-hall.
    -Blake E: Okay, hey, To-oh, wait, you said 'if I wanted d-hall'.

    Biology
    -Mrs. Douglas: It was really cool in here, then it got hot.
    -Josh: 'Cause I walked in.
    -Me: Yeah, you and all that hot air coming out of your mouth.
    -Emily: At least it's not coming out the other end.

    -Dustin: Can you believe that when we were in 8th grade in Mr. Butler's math class and he was standing up there, basically still teaching, and Crockett walked up there and started copying the answers out of the teachers' book! Mr. Butler says, 'Crockett! What are you doing?!' and Crockett's like, 'Gettin' help!' and Mr. Butler says, 'Crockett, I haven't even gave you an assignment!'

    -Josh: Mrs. Douglas, it's a lot easier to do this stuff the way you teach it, Mrs. Louks made it seem so hard.
    -Dustin: Hey, now! You're gonna start a teacher fight!
    -Josh: Yeah, I can see Mrs. Louks bursting throught that wall and being like, 'Whaddid you say?!'

    -Buster: All sailors turn into pirates.
    -Walker: That's an interesting philosphy, Buster.
    -Me: That must be evolution.

    -Mrs. Douglas: So, on question 22 about how you could determine if something is living or non-living you needed to have 8 reasons-
    -Josh: I put, 'Poke it'.
    -Mrs. Douglas: Yeah, that doesn't work.
    ...
    -Mrs. Douglas: So, on number 20 you were supposed to have 'centrifuge' but you can have 'blender'.
    -Josh: I wrote, 'Sharp, pointy thing'.
    -Mrs. Douglas: For some unknown reason I almost let you get away with that one.
    ...
    -Mrs. Douglas: I'll accept 'observation' or 'hypothesis' on number 16.
    -Josh: What about 'theory'?
    -Mrs. Douglas: No.
    -Josh: What if I say please?
    -Mrs. Douglas: No.

    Band
    -Mr. Mitchell: Trombones! I'm gonna poke your eyes out if you play E flat. You'll have to walk around for the rest of your life with one eye and people'll ask you, 'Hey, what happened to your eye?' and you'll have to say, 'Mr. Mitchell poked it out 'cause I played E flat.'.

    Spanish
    -Jeremiah: Mi mejor profesora es...Senora Hutchings. (My favorite teacher is Mrs. Hutchings)
    -Mrs. Hutchiings: Awww...gracias. Muy, bien, Jeronimo! (Awww...thank you. Very good, Jeremiah!)
    -Jeremiah: Yay! I get an A!

    Friday, September 7
    Algebra
    -Jon: Oh, dang. Now we're gonna have a whole class on fractions.
    -Mrs. Perry: No, we're gonna have a short class on fractions.
    -Kayla: Does that mean we get to leave early?!

    -Mrs. Perry: Okay, so today we're writing linear equations.
    -Jeremiah: Booooo!
    -Matt: Can I object?

    -Jon: Okay, I'm already lost.
    -Mrs. Perry: You just wrote the problem and you're already lost? That's pretty bad for you.
    -Matt: She says, 'Bad for you' because it really doesn't matter to her.

    Biology
    -Jeremiah: Protons, electrons, Fig Newtons and morons!

    -Maggie: Mrs. Douglas, your pants have flowers on them! They look so cute!
    -Josh: I have a pair just like them.
    -Mrs. Douglas: I bet you look cute in them, too.

    -Josh: Like a battery?
    -Walker: Psst! Josh!...We're not talking about that kind of charge.
    -Josh: We're not?
    -Walker: We're talking about protons.
    -Josh: What?
    -Walker: Bananas!
    -Josh: Heh, heh, banana...I hate bananas.

    (The intercom announces an all-call that Mrs. Burge has a call on line 3 in the middle of Mrs. Douglas's lecture)
    -Mrs. Douglas: This is actually the Bohr diagram...did everyone hear that?
    -Josh: Yes, Mrs. Burge has a phone call on line 3.

    -Jeremiah: Ions; that's a nice, short word.
    -Mrs. Douglas: Yeah, it's a good spelling word.
    -Josh: Will that be on the test?
    -Dustin: If you can't spell 'ion' you shouldn't be in Advance Placement Biology.
    -Maggie: Crockett!

    -Josh: Oh, I thought we were done with Mr. Boardy-Thingy!
    -Dustin: 'Mr. Boardy-Thingy'? It's a projector screen!
    -Josh: Okay, Mr. Pully-Downy-Screeny-Thing.

    -Josh: Let's talk about something more fun...like sports!
    -Dustin: What about that Michael Vick?
    -Josh: We should send him to the pound.
     
  13. sidlewannabee

    sidlewannabee CSI Level One

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    Thank you araSgerG. Tonks is really awesome.
    Are those actual stories from class? If so I would love to have you guys in my class. Granted I don't think I would learn very much, but I learn a lot from the books anyways.
     
  14. araSgerG

    araSgerG Lab Technician

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    Heck yeah, those are real stories...but I left my notebook of the stuff at school so I can't post any more today...and tomarrow we have tests in algebra and Spanish, so it probably won't be a good quote day...on the other hand my friend, Christy, has been sleep-deprived all week and tends to yell out stuff in band ("TRANCE!!!")which makes Jeremy and Casey laugh and then Mr. Mitchell only gives Casey and Jeremy detention...which makes me giggle...and Kayla's at the fair all this week, so aside from me, Dustin, Walker and Jeremiah teasing Meach and flying paper fighter jets nothing good happens in Spanish...but all our teachers are nuts so it's thrills a minute! Heh heh heh...
     
  15. SpeedsDaughter

    SpeedsDaughter CSI Level One

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    Me: (trying to be this person) OK... my name is Tatiana Nikolaevna... and I'm about to be murdered.
    Tov: How?
    Me: I... get pushed into the flowers.
    Tov: OOH! Death by petals! *random ninja sounds/actions)
     

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